Chapter 29
“The Commander stands for the virtues of wisdom, sincerity, benevolence, courage and strictness.”
Four days later, Edmond and I were on our way back from attending the wedding of Sybella and Mr. Marceaux—a hasty affair with an abundance of roses and rumors filling the church.
After the service, everyone celebrated the newlyweds in the Pratts’ garden.
Mr. Marceaux sulked in the corner of the patio, never far from his champagne glass.
He drank deeply every time one of the men from the club congratulated him with a slap on the back.
Sybella, on the other hand, showed off her new wedding band to anyone who had eyes.
She had no idea that the matching gold bands were gifted anonymously by none other than Edmond.
Each was inscribed with the words à jamais liés—“forever bound.”
How fitting.
I stood on the steps leading up to the house, looking up at the familiar pale stone facade and wrought-iron railings that now looked so much like a cage.
But I had a new home now, with Edmond. Before I married, however, I had to sort out one last bit of unfinished business: Mother’s sheet music.
She had written every song for me; it was the only gift she left behind.
Although Father claimed to have sold everything of hers, I had recently learned the sheet music had been spared.
Mrs. Sweete had gone to tea with one of the maids Father rehired, and she reported that he’d kept the sheet music.
Perhaps a part of his heart still ached for her too.
“I feel like the prodigal son,” I said, running my hand along the stone facade.
“Your father is a better fit for that role, considering he squandered his fortune and deserves your forgiveness.” Edmond paused, concern knitting his brow. “Are you sure you don’t want me to accompany you inside? I could ask for your father’s blessing.”
I shook my head vehemently. “There’s no need, considering we are already engaged. I’m sure Father has already heard the news of our engagement. Besides, he does not own my heart. I do. And I chose to give it to you. Nothing he can say will change that.”
Edmond tucked a stray lock of hair behind my ear. “Just call, and I will come running.”
“Don’t worry. If anything goes amiss, I’ll sound the war trumpets.”
I gave Edmond a peck on the cheek, then knocked on the front door. The butler soon appeared, clearly surprised to see me.
“M-miss?” he stammered.
“It’s only been four days, Mr. Brown. You can’t have forgotten my name in such a short time.”
His eyes widened. “Of course not, Miss Weston. It’s just we—I mean, I wasn’t expecting you.”
“I’m here to see Father.”
“Ah.” The butler frowned. “I don’t believe he’s home. Perhaps you could leave a mes—”
“I can see the cigar smoke coming from his window. You know as well as I do that he’s in his study.”
The butler swallowed. “Of course. Follow me, miss.”
“I know where it is, thank you.”
I brushed past him and made my way up the sweeping staircase. I smiled to myself as I passed three maids on the way there. Edmond’s payoff had given them back their jobs. He made a difference in so many lives, and they’d never know it was him.
I stopped at the end of the hall and knocked on the door three times.
“Not now. I’m busy.”
I opened the door. “Hello, Father.”
He stilled, glancing up from his work with a frown. “Helena?”
I strode inside, glancing at the bookshelves with hopes to find what I’d come for. But all that was there was Father’s collection of leather-bound volumes. So I lowered myself in the armchair across from him, not waiting for an invitation to sit.
“Are you well?” I asked, my expression aloof.
Father grimaced, leaning back in his chair and rubbing his hands together. “What are you doing here, Helena? I thought you had run off and eloped with that Hawke fellow.”
“We are engaged, yes. But I’m not here to talk about him. I’ve come for something else.”
He slammed his palm onto his desk. “I won’t be giving you a single pound for a dowry if that’s what you’re after! Not after all you’ve done to our family’s name. I’m treated like a leper thanks to you. Even Pratt is blaming me for his downfall!”
That piqued my interest. “Downfall?”
“Hawke offered Pratt’s mine workers twice their pay for less work each day. Unsurprisingly, they all took the offer, and Pratt will likely have to sell his mines off now that no one will work for him.” He scoffed. “Hawke may have bought you off as well, but I owe him nothing!”
“You owe him everything.” I pulled out the page Mrs. Sweete had torn from his ledger and placed it in front of him. “I know about your gambling debts, Father.”
He didn’t even glance at the page. “How dare you accuse me! I gave you everything, and this is how you talk to me?”
“I also know that Edmond generously paid off your debts, asking for only my freedom in return. Edmond is your savior, Father. But what makes him such an extraordinary man is that he’ll never come to collect.”
Father’s jaw clenched so hard I thought his teeth might shatter. “What do you want me to do, Helena? Grovel at Hawke’s feet?”
“No. Neither Edmond nor I want you to do anything. This isn’t about you. It’s about me.” I stood and looked down at my father. “I will forgive you—not because I wish to release you from responsibility, but because I wish to free myself from the pain you caused me.”
Father pushed himself up, placing both hands on his desk with a menacing sneer.
“The pain I caused you? What about the pain you caused me? If it weren’t for your disobedience ten years ago, your mother would still be here.
She wouldn’t have run through the streets and fallen sick if you’d been the daughter I expected you to be.
You owe me—for her death and for all the suffering I’ve endured as a result. ”
His words were poisonous arrows barraging me all at once, but not a single one hit. He was aiming at an old wound, one that had finally started to heal.
Realizing that I could have flaws and still be worthy of love had helped me see that Mother wouldn’t want me to carry the weight of that childhood mistake forever.
I had—at last—forgiven myself for my mistakes that day.
That forgiveness forged a shield around me that even Father’s piercing words could not penetrate.
“Actually, I’m here because of Mother,” I said. “I want her sheet music.”
Father blinked, clearly stunned his fury had not shaken me. “I don’t have it. I sold it.”
“It’s somewhere in here, isn’t it?” I moved around the desk, pulled out a drawer, and shuffled through its contents.
“Stop it! That’s my private desk!”
I yanked open another drawer and another. Father tried to swat my hand away, but I dodged and moved behind him toward the chest in the corner.
“I demand you stop at once!” he shouted. “This is criminal!”
“She wrote those songs for me.” I flung open the chest’s lid. “They say For Helena on each page. They are mine by right.”
I pushed aside a scattering of letters then paused as my fingers touched the familiar leather portfolio containing the precious sheet music. I clutched it against my chest, tears of relief threatening to spill over. It was like a missing part of my heart had been restored.
I stood a little straighter when I faced him. “Now that I’ve got what I came for, I will say goodbye to you, Father.”
“No! I forbid you to marry that man!” Spittle flew from his mouth, and his face turned an unfortunate shade of red.
I thought back to the man I had grown up with. He was imposing and intimidating. But the man shaking angrily before me now held no such grandeur. All I saw now was a sad man who had earned nothing from his life.
I pitied him.
Father jabbed his finger at me. “You will stay here to face your punishment and repair our family’s reputation. I will see you married when I say so.”
“I graciously decline.”
He simmered. “If you leave now, you are never welcome to return.”
I clung to Mother’s music even tighter. “Goodbye, Father.”
Then I opened the door and walked through it without looking back.
When I stepped outside onto the front step, I tilted my head up to the sun and let it warm my cheeks. I felt lighter than ever, as if the wind could lift me and carry me away.
Edmond appeared at my side. “Did you get it?”
I nodded, untying the leather string of my mother’s portfolio and opening it to reveal the precious pages within.
“It’s all I have left of her,” I said, tracing her beautiful script with my finger.
“May I see it?”
I relinquished the folder. Edmond accepted it gently, as if it were sacred. His gaze darted across the pages for a few seconds, then he closed his eyes and hummed. I stared in disbelief as he effortlessly rendered each lilting note in perfect pitch and rhythm.
When he finished, he opened his eyes and said, “What a lovely melody. Your mother was a talented composer.”
I snatched the portfolio back from him, aghast. “I have been practicing music for years—years—and yet you have the gall to have not only a perfect memory but also perfect pitch?”
“There are many things you have yet to learn about me,” he said with a sly smile.
I blew an incensed breath out of my nose. “I’m sure I will learn them all quickly—quicker than you will learn all there is to know about me.”
“Is that a challenge?”
“It’s a fact.”
Edmond laughed and took my hand, pulling me into a soft embrace.
“You know,” he whispered against my ear, “I had always dreamed of sweeping you away from this place and into my arms. But no dream could have ever prepared me for the joy of truly being yours. I love you more than you will ever know, Helena.”
“Oh, Edmond.” I smiled brightly up at him. “It’s not a contest.”
He gave a playful grin, then leaned in close and kissed me.
I couldn’t help but sigh against his lips, caught in the delicious euphoria of being loved completely.
This season had taught me that my strengths and flaws were two halves of the same whole, like the two halves of the glass bead. Like the heart Edmond and I now shared.
And with every beat of our intertwined hearts, I knew that I had secured the greatest victory of them all—love.