Chapter Twenty-Five
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
SEBASTIAN
I tuck Leena into my side and follow Luke and Colton out of the elevator and into our penthouse. I hear Luke laugh at something Colton said and I can’t help the fucking smile on my face when he does. It’s been a shitty few days for him too.
I glance down at Leena, and that same understanding passes between us. Because we both care about this man in the same way. Well, Leena is in love with him and I’m… I don’t fucking know anymore.
With Leena, it’s easy. I know I’m in love with her, so is Luke, and we make it our business to give her all the love she never had. The love she fucking deserves.
The part I can’t fucking figure out is what I’m feeling about whatever this thing is between me and my best friend.
Fuck. This is getting too goddamn messy. And way too fucking emotional. I don’t like it. I liked it when things were simple. When we were just fucking.
But was it ever really simple? I’m afraid of the answer to that question. It’s all fucked up and doesn’t make any sense to me.
I have to stop thinking about this.
“I’ll make drinks,” Luke says.
“I’ll help!” Colton chimes in, as we follow them toward the kitchen.
“I should take a shower,” Leena says, pulling away from me, but I don’t let her go that easily.
“I’ll help!” I say, grabbing her and throwing her over my shoulder before turning back to the guys with a not-so-subtle gloating expression.
Luke looks jealous as hell, but he lets me have this one. Colton, well, he just flips me off. I slap Leena’s ass, smiling at her laughter as I carry her down the hall.
“Make it quick!” Luke scolds, clearly upset that he volunteered to make drinks and entertain the kiddo rather than fucking Leena in the shower like I’m about to do.
“That wasn’t very nice,” Leena scolds when I set her down in the bathroom and close the door behind us.
“I know.” I don’t regret it, I just want her to myself for a few minutes.
“You’re going to have to make this up to him,” she says, crossing her arms over her chest, which only accentuates the breasts that are barely peeking out of her silk collared shirt. As much as I love our woman in her normal clothes, or… no clothes at all… there’s just something about her when she’s all dressed up for dinner. Must be those damn high heels. It makes me want to fuck her with the heels still on.
“Don’t worry about Luke, maybe we can make it up to him later… together.” I smirk. Leena’s eyes darken, and I know she likes that idea. I don’t think that the two of us have ever gone down on Luke together. But holy fuck does it make my dick hard just thinking about it.
Rock. Hard.
“Alright. Clothes off. Now,” I growl.
She smiles and tugs at her ponytail, letting her long black hair loose before starting on the buttons of her blouse. I grab the bottom of my shirt and quickly tug it over my head. I love the way she looks at me every time I do that.
I’ve always worked hard for this body, it’s kind of nice to have someone appreciate it the way she does.
“Keep. Going,” I tell her when she pauses to stare.
“Yes, sir ,” she snarks, but I’m not even mad about it. Because her shirt is off, and she’s sliding her pants down her perfect legs.
Of course she’s naked under there.
And now I’ve stopped moving, wondering how often throughout the day her piercing rubbed on the fabric unhindered. I make some sort of noise deep in my chest from the thought and Leena laughs.
“Clothes. Off,” she says.
I smirk, keeping my eyes on her as I slowly lower my pants then step out of them. She stares.
“Come on, darling,” I say, stepping into the shower and dragging her with me.
I immediately take her mouth with mine, letting the water run down our faces as I pull her body up against me, my lips frantic. She kisses me back, but all too soon she pulls away, holding my face between her hands and looking up at me with some disapproving look I can’t figure out.
“What’s wrong?” I ask, concerned.
“You can’t just fuck me every time you want to avoid whatever it is you’re upset about,” she whispers.
“I’m not upset,” I say quickly.
“Seb,” she says, looking up at me with those big eyes, the water lingering on her long lashes. I stare at her, then narrow my eyes, wondering how she could have known I was upset. I haven’t even admitted that to myself yet.
She’s right, as usual.
“Should I not have invited Colton over tonight?” she asks.
“No, no. He’s… well, he’s alone. And I…” I trail off, looking for the words.
“You know how that feels,” she finishes for me.
“Yeah, I do. I’m glad you asked him,” I say. And I mean it.
“Then what is it?”
I lean my forehead against hers, close my eyes and take in a breath.
“I’m just… confused,” I say. But I know that’s not really an answer.
“You’re allowed to be,” she says softly and her words hit me somewhere unexpected.
I am? I’ve worked my whole life to be sure of everything. To make quick, solid decisions and to stick by them. I’ve never been… confused about anything. So why the fuck would this be any different?
“You’re also allowed to be with Luke officially, if you want to be,” she continues.
“Leena, I don’t think it’s a good id–”
“I can see how much you want to be near him. How much it hurts you not to be. How much it hurts him . You can be whatever you want to be in public, or keep it private, I already told you I’ll support you both either way. But what I’m not okay with, is seeing you like this. Whatever decision you make needs to be the one that makes you happy.” She runs her fingers lightly over my cheek and I lean into the touch. “You don’t have to tell the whole world, you know. You don’t even have to tell the team. Maybe just start with one person?”
I take in her words. Every. Single. Fucking. One. Of. Them.
Am I really hurting Luke?
I suddenly feel this pressure in my chest, as if someone is pressing down on me and won’t let go. Was I really so fucking caught up in my own shit, so busy avoiding my feelings, to think for one goddamn minute about what this was doing to Luke?
Thinking about letting everyone see what we are when I don’t even know is fucking terrifying.
Not the whole world . Just start with one person.
“I don’t know how he would react,” I find myself saying to her, closing my eyes as the water pours over our bodies, her hands still grasping my face. Good. I need them.
I need her to hold me steady.
“Do you think he would judge you?” she asks honestly. But that’s an easy answer.
“No, he wouldn’t. But he might… look at me differently,” I say the last part slowly.
“He will look at you differently.” I pull away to stare at her, surprised again by her words, but she continues, “Because for the first time, he would be looking at you. All of you. And that’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
I stare at her. Those big eyes looking at me with all the love and care in the world. And I don’t know what I did to deserve this woman.
“Leena?” I ask, taking a deep breath.
“Sebastian?”
“Can I fuck you now?” I plead, grabbing both her ass cheeks in my hands and giving them a hard squeeze, pulling her tighter against me. She laughs, then runs her hands down my wet body, tracing my tattoos with her fingers, which has my dick immediately responding.
“Yes, sir.” She laughs as I quickly lift her up by that perfect ass and turn to slam her body into the tile wall beside us, her legs wrapping around my waist as our lips find each other’s again.