Chapter 25
Twenty-Five
THEO
“It would just be two episodes. Two weeks in Vancouver,” Miles Cooley coaxed down the line. He was the head writer and creator of a successful US crime series and I’d guest directed a few episodes of the show in the past. He wanted me out there in February to do a few more.
“I can’t commit to it, Miles. I’m sorry. I have a project in development that will probably take up most of my time in the new year. But thank you.”
“Okay. Well, I don’t need an answer for another week, so think on it,” Miles insisted.
I promised him I would, though I knew I couldn’t take the job. I hoped I’d be close to getting Juno into production by February.
We hung up and I turned to look at the tuxedo on my bed.
I’d had it delivered to the castle a few days ago.
With the horror of the Hangman cases lingering in my thoughts, I knew I was courting distraction by asking Sarah to attend the Ardnoch Christmas party with me.
The truth was, I wanted her back. Fully.
And it was better to pour all my attention into winning her back than think about the show or the murders.
There was nothing more I could do, anyway.
Skylark World Productions sent the police the list of cast and crew, and some of them had been contacted.
The production company had their PR team fired up and ready to go as soon as this became real news.
So far, it hadn’t turned into that, but I had a sinking feeling it wasn’t far from breaking headlines.
As such, I was concentrating elsewhere.
On the one thing that was most important to me in the world. In a few hours, I’d pick up Sarah and bring her back to the estate and we’d get ready here together. I’d spend the entire night showering her with affection and attention and proving to her that she was all I wanted.
And maybe, just maybe, she’d let me touch her again.
There was nothing quite like being denied the one thing you wanted more than anything. I longed for her, even though I’d had her. I wanted her more than I’d ever wanted anyone. Because it wasn’t actually about sex. It was about connection.
She had her guard up.
I wanted to smash that guard to smithereens and prove to her she never needed it again.
Fuck, if any one of my acquaintances knew what I’d do for this woman, they wouldn’t believe it. That, I, Theo Cavendish, was at the mercy of an introverted Scot.
Screw them. I’d shed my pride for Sarah McCulloch any day of the bloody week.
A rhythmic thudding sounded on my suite door, followed by, “Theo? Are you in there?”
Recognizing the deep, Scottish-accented voice, I pinched the bridge of my nose.
North.
Well, I suppose this meeting was inevitable. Crossing the room, I grabbed my rental car keys off the side table and pulled open the door.
Sure enough, North stood on the other side, hands in his pockets, a scowl marring his brow. “You’re alive.” He brushed past me, pushing into the room.
“And on my way out.” I turned with a beleaguered sigh, closing the door behind me. “But do come in.”
North faced me, arms now folded over his chest. “I don’t enjoy having my calls screened. Especially after having the news dropped on me that a bloody serial killer found his inspiration from a part I played.”
“A part I wrote, old boy. Imagine how I feel. I dreamed up a twisted, complicated bastard of a character, one I was proud of … until someone brought his wicked misdeeds to life.”
Sympathy gleamed in North’s eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for both of us. We created him together, so you’re not alone in feeling unsettled by this.”
“Don’t you mean guilty?”
“No.” North shook his head. “We made a TV show, Theo. Like hundreds of creators before us have done. It is not our fault some sick fuck decided to carry out those murders.”
Growing agitated because he was distracting me from my distraction, I scrubbed a hand down my face. “I don’t want to think about it today, so if you’re quite done …”
He cocked an eyebrow. “What? Leave? Very nice. Is that it, then? You’re ghosting me like I’m a flexible gymnast you’ve grown bored with.”
Ignoring the jab at my previous sexual exploits, I shrugged with more nonchalance than I felt. “Believe it or not, you were one of the few people in this industry I didn’t mind having around. Thought I could trust you. Until you blabbed like a tween to Sarah’s cousin and sent him after me.”
“I won’t apologize for that.” North shrugged. “I was protecting Sarah. To get involved with her was wrong, Theo.”
“Why?”
Anger flickered over his face. “Because she’s a grieving member of staff at this estate who can barely say boo to a goose, and you shacked up with her when she was at her most vulnerable.”
“Sarah is an intelligent, talented thirty-one-year-old ex-member of staff, and she knows her own mind.”
“She doesn’t know you.”
“Do you?” I asked, losing my patience. “Do you actually know anything real about me, North, other than my work? No,” I answered for him, and his chin jerked back in surprise.
“You don’t know a damn thing about me. But Sarah does.
She knows me better than anyone. And I swear to God, if you try to come between me and Sarah again, I’ll ruin you. ”
My old friend gaped at me, stunned. Silent.
“You can leave now.” I gestured to the door.
“Theo.” North took a step toward me, gaze searching mine. “I’m sorry, mate. I … I clearly got the wrong end of the stick.”
“Yes, you did. A stick that is rammed thoroughly up your arse.”
The corner of his mouth lifted. “I suppose I jumped to conclusions. I’ve just never known you to be serious about anyone.”
I looked away, still not entirely comfortable with the strength of feeling I had for Sarah but willing to deal with it to keep her. “I never thought I’d be serious about a woman again.”
“Again?”
“There was a woman when I was younger. We met at uni and dated for a while. Thought I loved her. She … she had an affair with my father while my mother was dying. Then she married him and stayed with him until he grew bored and traded her in for a younger model.”
North’s eyes widened in shock. “Fuck, Theo … that’s brutal. I’m sorry.”
“Yes, well, never really had much interest in relationships after that.”
“Until Sarah?”
Rubbing the back of my neck, I gave my friend a rueful smile. “She’s rather special. Don’t know what she sees in me.”
North grinned and clapped me on the arm. “No one does, mate.”
“Oh, fuck off,” I said without heat, turning to the door. “Literally. I have to pick up Sarah for the party tonight.”
“She’s coming here?” he asked as we left the room.
“Yes. Problem?”
“Of course not. I just wondered if I could tell Aria about her writing under S. M. Brodie. She was worried when Sarah suddenly quit the estate.”
It was clear from our conversation with Sloane Ironside and Monroe Adair the other day that Sarah had told them about her writing. “I don’t see why not. She’s telling other people now.”
He grinned. “Good. I’m looking forward to seeing you two together.”
“I’m never living this down, am I?”
“You once called me a brain-addled romantic and said that falling in love would end badly for me. Of course, I’m holding this over you.”
“I also, if you remember, was the one who advised you to give Aria your trust. And how did that work out?”
“So, what you’re saying is you’ve been a secret romantic this whole time?” North teased as he took the castle stairs.
“I wouldn’t go that far.”
“I guess we’ll see tonight.”
I rolled my eyes. “Please do not watch over us like we’re the evening’s entertainment. Sarah hasn’t miraculously changed overnight. Though she’s growing in confidence, she doesn’t like being the center of attention. And I want her to enjoy this evening.”
North chuckled. “While it’s adorable you’re looking out for her feelings, Cavendish, you need to get real. You’re bringing Sarah to a celebrity Christmas party at the place of her former employment. People will be curious about this odd match of yours.”
I scowled at the phrase odd match. “Pish posh. Ninety-five percent of this elitist community are too busy drowning in their own bovarism to even know or care who I am.”
“What exactly is bovarism?”
“Sarah would know,” I told him haughtily.
North laughed. “Oh, man, you’ve got it bad.”
I didn’t disagree. Instead, as we reached the great hall, I told him, “I’ll see you tonight.”
“Wait. Theo.”
Turning to him, I raised an impatient eyebrow.
North looked remorseful. “I am sorry. I … I realize now that I was a shitty friend when you’ve been a good friend to me.”
Giving him a reassuring clap on the shoulder, I promised, “All’s forgiven. Let’s forget it.”
My friend nodded and I experienced a rush of relief.
I’d been so busy with Sarah that I hadn’t realized just how much it bothered me to be in a bad place with North.
I didn’t have a lot of genuine friends, and while I liked to pretend I didn’t need them, it wasn’t true.
Having North in my life had been like having a brother I could count on again.
Goodness, I’d grown maudlin since finding Sarah. Shaking my head ruefully, I gave North a gentle shove and stalked away. “See you tonight.”
“Oh, aye, we will! Looking forward to it!” I heard the amusement in his voice.
With a beleaguered sigh at his nonsense, I hurried out of the castle, heading toward the mews where my rental was parked.
“So we discussed all that,” I called to Sarah as she got ready in my suite’s bathroom.
I’d just relayed my meeting with North to her.
“But I have to admit, I didn’t feel like discussing the murders.
Perhaps I should have. I’m sure North is concerned he’s going to make the headlines again for all the wrong reasons. ”
“There’s still time to do that,” she called back. “I’m sure North understands your reluctance to talk about it. But if it’s bothering you, just make it clear when you see him next that you’re there for him if he wants to talk about it.”
“Yes, yes. You’re right.” I tweaked my black velvet bow tie as I stared in the mirror.
The last time I’d worn a tux was at an awards ceremony.
I owned two tuxedos. This one was a burgundy velvet tuxedo jacket with black lapels.
I wore it with black trousers and a white shirt.
A little outlandish but perfect for a Christmas event.
“Well?”
I turned from fussing with the tie and froze at the sight that greeted me.
Sarah wore a green velvet dress. It had thin straps, a fitted bodice, and a pleated skirt that flowed from her waist to her knees.
The green was dark against her smooth, pale skin.
She’d paired the dress with strappy delicate heels that made her already gorgeous legs look fucking fantastic.
Her hair was styled in waves down her back, and her makeup was light except for her eyes.
She wore black mascara that lengthened her lashes considerably, and the green of her irises was impossibly vivid.
I was struck mute.
She was graceful and elegant and sexy as hell.
It was difficult for me to believe that I’d never paid much attention to her before she came to my room all those months ago.
I mean, I’d noticed her, eventually. North and I had bumped into her once, and it was the first time I’d realized she was beautiful.
But … that was just noting something physical about her. I didn’t know her then.
Now I knew her. Now I knew how extraordinary she was. “You are the most stunning creature I’ve ever seen,” I blurted out, the compliment raspy with emotion.
Sarah flushed a pretty pink, the color spreading across her chest. Tenderness and something like possessiveness filled me. “Thank you. You look very handsome.”
I grinned as I crossed the room to her. “Is it perverse of me that I like that I can still make you blush?”
She rolled her eyes as I pulled her against me. “I would expect nothing less.”
I smoothed my hands down her waist, desire heating my blood. “I miss you.”
Understanding softened her expression. “I know.” She caressed my chest. “I miss you too. We’re getting there, though. I promise.”
Determined to respect her wishes, even if the cost was physical pain, I stepped back. “We look like a Christmas advertisement.”
Sarah laughed, taking in the burgundy velvet of my tuxedo against the forest green of her dress. “So we do.” She reached for my hand, drawing me back to her. “Who cares? I think we’re beautiful.”
“You certainly are.” I threaded my fingers through hers, drawing her close before leading her toward the door. “I’m warning you, I’m feeling very thigmophilic this evening. You can tell me to back off whenever it gets too much.”
She blushed prettily again, heat in her eyes that gave me hope. “Maybe I’m feeling thigmophilic tonight too.”
Grinning, I nodded. “Good. I’m open to groping. Are you?”
She smacked my arm, laughing.
“That wasn’t a no, little darling.”
Sarah leaned into me, wrapping her other arm around mine. “No, it wasn’t, was it?”