Epilogue
FYFE
In the following nights, Millie slept in the cot I’d arranged at the bottom of our bed.
Both Eilidh and I needed her there. Eilidh canceled her business trip, though I told her not to.
She said she couldn’t leave us. And thankfully the streaming service agreed to rearrange the meeting for next month.
Part of me was pissed off at Eilidh for forging ahead into an unknown situation that could have put both her and Millie at risk.
She insisted she wouldn’t have done it if she’d thought Millie’s kidnapper was truly dangerous.
As I pointed out, anyone who kidnapped a child was in a dangerous headspace.
Thankfully, it turned out Jay was the worst kidnapper that had ever existed.
The police found her running through the gardens at the back of the village and arrested her.
She was charged with kidnapping, child endangerment, and breaking and entering.
She’d smashed open the lockbox where the house keys were stored for my holiday home renters.
In the days that followed, I found it hard to shake the jitters or the need to keep both Eilidh and Millie close. I worked from home all week and promised Eilidh I’d return to my regularly scheduled program after the weekend, and that Millie would need to sleep in the cot in her nursery.
The police kept us informed regarding Jay’s pending case. She had a hearing in a few weeks, but from what they told us, she was going to cop to the charges and we’d probably not have to face a trial. Which was a relief since we already had one of those on the future docket.
Throughout it all, I never heard one word from Mum, though Eilidh was positive she’d overheard Jay on the phone to her.
It was a shock then when an alert on my phone went off and I saw a familiar Nissan park outside.
When I told Eilidh who was pulling up, her features grew taut with concern, but she told me to stay calm.
That all depended on what my mother had to say.
I opened the front door before she could even knock.
The well-put-together woman who’d stood at my door over a year ago now looked a little older, wearier.
A bit bedraggled, even. But sober. Grief darkened her eyes.
“Hullo, Fyfe.” Her eyes moved to my side, and I glanced down to see Eilidh there.
She slipped her arm around me, giving me her silent support. “I recognize you …?”
“Eilidh Adair,” she offered. “Fyfe’s girlfriend.”
“Right.” My mother’s gaze returned to mine. “I didn’t want to call. What I have to say … you deserve to hear from me, face-to-face.”
A familiar dull ache almost made me slam the door.
However, I knew I’d always wonder. And if she was here to do more damage, at least I had Eilidh at my side.
Sliding my arm around Eilidh’s shoulders, I drew her against me and eased her away from the door. “Come in.”
Relief flickered over Innes’s face as she stepped inside.
Millie was in her cot, napping. Next week, we’d get her back to daycare.
She needed her routine and Regan needed to know we didn’t blame her for what happened.
Eilidh’s mum kept apologizing every time we saw her, and it was awful to see her so distressed.
I think we knew the only way to solve that problem was to show Regan we trusted her.
I had no doubt in my mind she would never let anything like this happen again under her watch.
Innes walked hesitantly into the living space, her attention going to Millie. She appeared obviously troubled as she studied me. “I am so sorry.”
“You didn’t do it.”
She bit her trembling lip, glancing between me and Eils. “Could … could we maybe talk in private?”
“No,” I denied. “Whatever you say, I’m going to tell Eilidh, anyway.”
I felt Eilidh’s fingers curl into the fabric of my T-shirt as she leaned more heavily into me.
Innes nodded, exhaling shakily. “Okay. Well …” I noted the bleached white of her knuckles as she gripped the strap of her handbag.
“First, this is the last you’ll see of me.
I just wanted to apologize for what happened with Millie.
But also what happened last year when I came here.
Jay … Jay talked me into it. She was here with me. That’s how she knew about the cottage.”
“I gathered,” I clipped out.
Eilidh soothed a hand over my stomach and some of my bristling tempered.
“I won’t blame Jay for what I did—asking for the cottage.
That’s on me. I … Jen, her daughter, she was in with the wrong crowd.
Doing drugs. And we thought if we could afford to move out of the area, she’d have a chance at starting over.
When she died, Jay …” Innes’s eyes brightened, and she glanced at Millie.
“I’ll never be able to tell you how sorry I am.
I should have tried harder with Jay, to get her some help.
I knew she was plummeting off the deep end.
Please know, it was grief. She’s never done anything like this before. ”
I did know that. The police had told me Jay had no criminal record. And I knew that grief was a strange monster. No one knew how it would affect them. I had compassion. To a point. But my daughter was stolen from me and for an hour, we’d all been terrorized by Jay’s actions. “It’s done.”
“I’m not here to ask you to drop charges or anything,” Innes reassured me. “She should do the time for what she did to you that morning, and Jay is remorseful. She agrees she should do the time.”
“Why are you here?” Eilidh asked suspiciously.
“I’m here to be honest with you and to be honest with myself.
Seeing Jay fall apart after Jen’s death, to see what a mum’s love and losing a child could do to a person, well, it clarified things for me …
I … I wasn’t built to be a mum. And I don’t want you to think I went off and became a mum to someone else.
Because I know that’s the picture I painted.
But the truth is, Fyfe, I fell in love with Jay and she came with a child.
But … I never wanted children.” Her eyes gleamed with apology.
“It’s not that I didn’t love you, Fyfe. I just don’t have it in me to be a mother.
And that would be fine. I truly believe some people aren’t meant to be parents and shouldn’t be and shouldn’t be judged for that …
but the reality is, I did have a child. I had a child, and I was terrible to you.
” A tear slipped down her cheek and she swiped it away.
“If I could do it all again, I would never have listened to my mum. I would have given you up for adoption as a baby so you could have had what you deserved. A loving family. If I’d done that, it would have been the best version of my love. ”
I swallowed hard around the words, feelings, swelling inside.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
I could only nod.
Eilidh leaned her weight into me, her tone uncharacteristically cool.
“Fyfe has a loving family. He’s had a loving family since he was twelve years old.
And he’s had me. Now he has Millie too. For the rest of his life, not a day will pass without him knowing he’s loved.
So if that’s all you came to say, I think it’s time to leave. ”
Innes studied her thoughtfully, then nodded. We followed her to the door. Not another word was exchanged, but I stayed to watch her walk to her car. As she opened the driver’s-side door, she looked back at me.
I lifted my hand and gave her a small wave of goodbye.
She pressed her lips together and got in the car as I closed the front door.
“That woman …” Eilidh trembled with anger beside me.
I pulled her close, pressing a kiss to her hair. “Actually, what she said helped.”
Eilidh jerked back. “It did?”
“It did. It made me understand Pamela better. She told me she wasn’t built to be a mother and that giving Millie to me was giving her the best chance.
Some people shouldn’t be parents, Eils. This …
this is the best way Pamela can show her love for our daughter.
And maybe I can forgive that after all.”
Tilting her head back to stare up at me in awe, Eilidh whispered hoarsely, “You are the best man I know, Fyfe Moray. I’m so grateful I get to do life at your side.”
I cupped her face in my hands and brushed a soft kiss across her lips. “Not as grateful as me,” I promised her.
Nowhere near as thankful as me.
I was the luckiest man in all the Highlands.
THE END … ALMOST …
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