Series Epilogue #3
Aria tossed me a dark, sexy look over her shoulder. “You had to be loud, didn’t you. Caveman.” She pushed up off the desk, shoving her skirt back down. “If I lose my job for unprofessionalism, I will lose my mind at you.”
Feeling too satisfied and smug to engage in another argument, I shrugged. “Worth it.”
Hurt flickered over her face. “I can’t believe you think I’d flirt with someone else.”
Groaning, I tried to reach for her and she rounded the desk, putting it between us. “Gorgeous,” I pleaded. “I’m sorry. Look, I know you wouldn’t. I’m just tired.”
She crossed her arms over her ample chest. “Not good enough.”
Frustration gnawed at me. I was home for only a few weeks. I didn’t want to spend that time arguing. “I wasn’t thinking clearly.”
“Still not good enough.”
“Fine.” I threw my hands up. “I am sick and tired of missing my family and feeling like they don’t give a shit I’m never here.
You tell me you miss me, but I don’t feel it.
I miss you, Aria, like I’m walking around without a fucking limb.
But you act like everything’s fine and dandy, that life goes on just the same whether I’m here or not.
And Maddox has plenty of men around him, he barely even notices my absence. ”
“What do you want me to say?” She shook her head in disbelief. “I knew this was your job when I married you.”
“That’s it. That’s all you have to say.” Crushing disappointment had me staggering back.
“No.” Tears filled her eyes. “No. But if I said what I truly wanted to say, then you’d make changes and resent me for them. And I don’t want you to make changes because of me. I want you to make changes because that’s what you want.”
“So we’re playing games? After almost two decades of marriage, we’re playing games?”
“You’re the one playing games.”
“I miss you. I want to be home more. But not if I’m not needed.” There. I’d said it. My worst fears. “Distance doesn’t make the heart grow fonder, gorgeous. It makes it insecure and lonely.”
“You think I’m not?” She gestured to herself. “When we got married, you chose roles that kept you close to home. Then we got Maddox and we had you all to ourselves for a while. But we weren’t enough for you.”
“What?” I glowered.
“We weren’t.” She shrugged. “You needed more. And that’s fine.
But you were the one who said yes to bigger roles that took you away from us for months out of the year.
You did, North. And I agreed to go along with it because I knew what I was signing up for when I married an actor.
But you don’t get to come marching back after months of being away and accuse us of not missing or needing you.
I’m raising our child on my own while holding down a full-time job.
So the people around me who love me are stepping in to support us while you’re gone.
Of course we fucking need you!” she yelled, pain etching her features.
Seeing it was like a knife in the heart.
“But I will not be the one who asks you to give up something you love. I don’t want to have to.
As for your son, he talks about you every day.
He’s just a resilient kid, and he’s making the best of not having his dad around. ”
Longing constricted my chest. “You and Maddox are what I love. The most important thing. This was my mistake. These last few years, they were my mistake. Thinking I could have my cake and eat it too.” I shrugged as tears blurred my vision. “I’m not happy without you. I miss you.”
Aria licked her lips and asked tentatively, “What does that mean?”
Almost two decades this woman had been mine. I knew her inside and out. So I knew that her tone and that careful expression on her face was her trying not to hope.
Fuck.
She was trying not to hope that I might want to stay home.
That killed me. “Theo wants me to consider a role on his and Eilidh’s show. It would mean at least a season of work.”
Her lips parted, and I could see the excitement building in her eyes. “They film that forty minutes from here.”
I nodded, smiling. “Aye, they do.”
The light dimmed in her gaze. “But is that what you really want?”
“Aye.” I rounded the desk now, done with it being between us. “It’s absolutely what I want.” I pulled her into my arms, peppering her cheeks with kisses before cuddling her against me. Her fists tightened in the back of my shirt as she hung on. “I’m sorry for being such a bastard earlier.”
“When? When you accused my security guard of flirting with me or when you bent me over the desk and had your wicked away with me?” she teased.
“Should I be sorry for the latter?”
“No,” Aria grumbled. “It was hot.”
I shook with laughter, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead. “I am sorry. I’ve just … all of that shit has been building over months, and it spilled out in the least mature way I could think of.”
It was her turn to laugh as she pulled back to grin up at me. “It’s okay. But just so you know, we will always need you, North. When you leave, you take a piece of me with you, and that empty place that’s left inside aches until you’re home again.”
“Fuck,” I murmured, clasping her beautiful face in my hands. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too.”
I brushed my lips over hers and we sighed into each other’s mouths. After a few moments of just soaking up each other’s presence, I said, “Do you think we can take Mad out of school early today?”
“No,” she replied instantly and sternly, making me chuckle. “But you can be there to pick him up after school. He’ll be so over the moon to see his dad.”
“Aye?”
“You’re kind of his hero, you know?”
“Really?”
“Yes.” She squeezed me. “He thinks you are very cool. And I’ve been told by those in the know that you should enjoy this time, buddy, because in about five years, he’s going to think you and I are the definition of not cool.”
Chuckling, I nodded. “Got it. Enjoy the cool while we can.”
A few hours later, after unpacking my luggage, a quick shower, and food, I drove to Ardnoch Primary.
The place was packed with parents picking up their kids, and I ignored the wide-eyed looks of recognition and made my way through the crowd toward familiar faces.
My best mate, Theo Cavendish, stood at the school gates with my sister-in-law, Allegra McCulloch.
He and Allegra were also related by marriage as Theo was married to Sarah, Allegra’s husband’s cousin.
Theo’s daughter, my pseudo niece, Rose, was six years old, and Theo or Sarah collected her and Mad from primary school every day to help us out. Ally’s son, my nephew Collum, had just started school, and Allegra was about four months pregnant with her and Jared’s second child.
“Look at these two troublemakers,” I announced my presence.
Ally whirled around, eyes wide, and then immediately threw her arms around me. I gave her a tight hug and pulled back to note her slight bump.
“How are you feeling?” I asked. “Doing well? You look happy.”
“I am doing well and I’m extremely happy.” She nudged me. “So … are you sticking around for a while?”
My eyes met Theo. “My friend here offered me a part I couldn’t refuse.”
His lips curled. “I take it that’s your way of accepting the role?”
“Aye, if you still want me.”
“I’m not sure anyone wants you, old boy, but yes, you are rather perfect for the part.”
I shook my head at his drollness, my attention moving to the school as the bell rang. My pulse picked up speed. “How is my boy?”
“He’s great.” Allegra rubbed a soothing hand over my back. “Mad will be so excited to see you.”
“Aye. I can’t wait to see him.”
Conversation passed between my friend and sister-in-law, but I wasn’t paying any attention. I strained to see Maddox.
Then there he was.
Strolling out of the building, his backpack too big and bouncing off his back as he skip-walked while chatting with one of his wee pals.
The day we picked him up, he’d been shyly hiding behind his social worker.
I’d held out my hand to him, at once terrified of being a parent, but also determined to love him as hard as any father had loved a son.
Our eyes had met and at that moment, I’d claimed him. My wee boy.
Maddox had looked warily at my hand for a second and then, as if he knew I was his too, he released his hold on his social worker and slowly reached for me. As soon as my fingers curled around his tiny hand, I’d promised to never let go.
All that love swelled up in me, and I pushed past parents so Mad could see me.
His friend saw me first, hitting Mad’s shoulder as he pointed at me.
Maddox’s head jerked around.
His entire face lit up with surprise and delight. “Dad!” he yelled.
I swear I had to stop myself from bawling like a baby as he ran through the other kids to get to me, beaming from ear to ear.
I didn’t care if he was eight and too old for it. I swooped him up into my arms, mine slipping beneath his backpack to hold him close. Maddox wrapped himself around me like a monkey, laughing with joy that I was home.
“When did you get home? Are you staying? Can you cook the chicken wrap thingies I like? When do you leave?” He blurted out all his questions at once as I carried him back toward his aunt and uncle.
“I just got home. Aye, I’m staying. Aye to the wraps and I don’t leave for a few weeks. But I won’t be long this time. When I come home again, I’ll be sticking around. How does that sound?”
He clung to my neck, bobbing his head with excitement. “Good, good. That means we can start a tournament on this new fight game Uncle Fyfe bought me. It’ll take us weeks!”
Grinning as I lowered him to the ground, I said truthfully, “Sounds fun, pal.”
He grabbed my hand, clutching tightly as he turned to Theo and Ally. “Dad’s back!”
“So we see.” Ally laughed at his exuberance.
“Sorry, Uncle Theo, but I don’t need a lift with you and Rose because Dad’s back.” He shrugged like he wasn’t sorry at all.
“How easily I’m replaced,” Theo drawled, eyes dancing with amusement.