Chapter 26
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Nate
“It’s the third publishing house to come knocking since I turned fifty. I’m taking it personally now.”
Dad bursts out laughing at the end of Chase’s outraged monologue, and all I can do is shake my head at both of them as an identical chuckle escapes me.
“You’re ridiculous,” I tell Chase.
“I am not. I swear they think I’m on my deathbed or something. Who the hell would want to read the autobiography of a fifty-year-old dude who’s not famous?”
“But you are famous,” Dad points out. “In certain circles,” he adds in a quieter voice. Chase just pffs at him and goes back to his steak.
The smile stays firmly on my face as they keep discussing their old age, and I’m having a better time than I thought I would when Dad told me about the dinner.
He hadn’t come to England to have dinner with Chase, but to check on a few things for Aunt Shirley. The invite came right as we were finishing up lunch—one where Dad showed his true colors and let his inner old lady out for a spectacular tea-spilling session.
It was funny when he finally let his awe show at Ru being a lord. Then hearing all the news from back home kept me in a great mood, right up until Dad got Chase’s text.
I didn’t want to come all the way to London only to have to go back to Oxford late at night, but now I realize that this dinner makes me feel like I’m back home.
Could have something to do with hearing two accents as American as mine, or it could have something to do with Dad, but I’m enjoying it.
“Actually, I made a friend who’s in the book business. Or well, he will be.”
“You made a friend?” Dad asks suggestively, and I have to roll my eyes at him. I warned him that Chase knows who Ru is, and to not say shit about him because Ru isn’t out, but he can’t help teasing me a bit more about my wooing ways.
“Yes, my first day at Oxford. His name’s Noah and he’s getting a masters in publishing this year because he wants to become a literary agent. He’s been working around books for years and years now. So,” I say, looking at Chase now. “If you ever do decide to write your autobiography or take all that damn money those people are offering you, then I recommend Noah. He’s smart as hell, hardworking, and a good person.”
“I doubt I’ll ever go for it,” Chase says in a grumble.
“You really should. In fact?—”
Dad gets cut off by the ringing of my phone.
I frown as I fish it out of my pants, but then I have to smile when Ru’s name appears on the screen. I don’t even care about being polite, I hit answer right away.
“Hey,” I greet him, trying to infuse the joy I feel into that one word.
“Nate.”
The tortured tone of his voice has me on alert right away.
“What’s wrong?”
“My father, uh—” He stops and I can hear his big intake of breath through the phone. “He collapsed before dinner.”
“Oh my God,” I whisper.
“He’s stable now. I don’t know what’s going to happen next, but he’s stable now and we got him transferred to Wellington Hospital, but I need—I want you here, please.”
It takes me a moment to grasp onto what his request must mean. It’s not something I’m going to talk about with him over the phone, though. “Are you sure?” I ask, just to make sure.
“Please,” he says simply, sounding so unlike the man I woke up with this morning.
“All right, give me the name of the hospital again please. I’m in London having dinner with Chase and Dad,” I add, just to warn him, then listen intently. “The Wellington Hospital, okay, I’ll let you know how fast I can get there?—”
“It’s only five minutes away,” Chase interrupts me. My gaze shoots up to him and I see he’s worried. He doesn’t even know who I’m talking to, but he’s worried that someone I know is in the hospital. He’s such a good man. “I know the head of cardio. I can make sure whoever it is, is comfortable and taken care of.”
“Did you catch that?” I ask Ru.
“I did.” I can’t know what he’s thinking from those two words, so I stand and walk a few feet away from the table.
“I can come alone. I’m sure they’re already taking great care of your dad,” I whisper.
“No,” he says resolutely. “It’s fine, bring them. I just need you here as soon as you can get here.”
“Okay, I’ll see you soon,” I assure him.
“Thank you,” he whispers and the line goes dead.
When I get back to the table, Dad’s already paying the bill and Chase is whining about paying and being dismissed.
“Shut up and call your doctor friend.”
“I texted like a normal person,” Chase points out. “It is Saturday night and not everyone’s a workaholic, you know?”
“We need to go,” I tell them, feeling the urgency deep inside me.
“Yes, and Dr. Brotherton told me he’s in there already.”
As promised, we’re walking into the hospital only five minutes after walking out of the restaurant, and Ru’s right there, looking disheveled and more tired than I’ve ever seen him. His eyes open wide when he sees me come in, and they shift to the men at my side.
I hesitate then.
Yes, he told me it was fine to bring them along, but now...
He closes the distance between us in five long strides and throws his arms around me. I hug him back when he buries his face against my neck. I feel him let out a shuddering breath and strengthen my hold on his back.
“I’m here,” I murmur. “I’m right here—Ru.”
I was just about to call him my lord, but considering the circumstances I thought better of it. I hope he didn’t hear it, though, because that’s the last thing he needs right now.
“I’ll go up to see Dr. Brotherton,” I hear Chase say from behind me.
Ru doesn’t react in any way, so I don’t either, but he doesn’t let himself be comforted for much longer.
His eyes look sad and worried and I fucking hate that.
“Ru,” I murmur, and cup his cheek, but he shakes his head and composes himself before looking to my left.
“I’m sorry to interrupt your evening, sir,” he says, so fucking politely I wanna smack him over the head.
Dad frowns at him.
“No need to apologize. This is more important. We’re here to support you.”
“There’s a quieter waiting room upstairs. We should go there.” His eyes shift nervously around the entrance of the hospital, and that’s the only reason why I don’t take his hand when we walk to the elevator and don’t say a word until we’re in the little room. Dad hangs back by the door.
“I’m going to go get us all coffees. Be back soon.” He offers us a small smile and then closes the door behind him.
“What can I do?” I ask immediately, and lead Ru to a two-seater sofa that’s less uncomfortable than it looks.
“I don’t know,” he whispers and looks down at his hands. “He collapsed because I finally admitted I’m gay and not bi, and because I told him I wouldn’t marry a woman because I have you. He told me he wouldn’t have a gay man as head of the family and... Well, I was walking away when he—when it happened.”
He reaches blindly for my hand while my heart stutters and stops for a full beat. Between his beats and starts I get the full picture.
“Ru.” It’s all I can say for a long moment. “You’re so fucking brave.” He scoffs and shakes his head. “You are?—”
“If I were, I’d’ve told him ages ago,” he cuts me off, and I have to sigh.
“You were very fucking brave today , and that’s what matters.”
“Yeah, and I almost put my father in an early grave,” he snaps at me, but I let it go quickly. This isn’t about me, it’s about him and the voice inside his head that’s still telling him he can’t be his true self.
“No.” The simple denial is hard enough to have him snapping his head up and looking at me—finally. “What made your father collapse is probably a life full of stress, some bad eating habits, and fear . Prejudice, archaic fucking beliefs, and unwillingness to change and get with the fucking times. You didn’t do this. He did this to himself. Don’t you dare blame yourself for his fucked up head and heart, you got me?” I demand, ragged puffs of air leaving my lips.
I won’t let him blame himself. I won’t .
“I got you,” he says quietly, looking at me like I’m some alien or something.
And okay, this is probably not how I should be speaking to him when his dad’s in the hospital, but?—
“I love you.”
The words come out softly, in his beautiful tender voice that melts my insides.
“That’s a reaction I didn’t expect,” I tell him for some fucking reason. I don’t know why those were the first words out of my mouth, but I hope my smile clues him in to what’s coming next.
He laughs, looking less heavy and apparently not at all bothered by my reaction.
“It’s the truth.” He shrugs and looks away for a second, but I know he’s waiting for it now, and I’ll give it to him. Whatever he wants.
“I—”
“They have a great coffee shop downstairs.” Dad bursts in, not caring at all about what was about to happen inside. “I swear they offered me like ten different blends?—”
“Dad, get out!” I shout.
He frowns at me, clearly put out, but then seems to realize some of what’s happening and turns right around with the carton of to-go cups still in his hand.
I turn right back to Ru and cup his cheeks.
“I love you too. Maybe more. Maybe I’ll become one of those saps that always has to tell you, because let me tell you, it feels good to tell you I love you. I do. So, so much it?—”
I groan in relief when he shuts me up with a hard kiss. It’s simply perfect.
We get lost in it for a while, enjoying this bubble we created where the world can’t barge in.
And when he’s ready he pulls back and looks at the door. I know what that means.
“Come in, Dad,” I shout again.
“Sorry ’bout that,” he says sheepishly and offers us the coffees.
“So how is he now?” I ask Ru. The he doesn’t need an explanation.
“Mother told me he’s stable, but I haven’t seen him. Considering everything that happened right before, I don’t think he wants to see me.” He looks down gloomily at his coffee.
“I don’t know,” Dad muses. “I don’t know your dad, of course, but you won’t know unless you ask. I think he would like to see you.”
Ru looks out the window and contemplates that in silence for a minute. I’m not gonna tell him what to do. Personally, I’m not a father, and I don’t know his father, so I don’t know how I could have any type of wisdom to share here.
“Will you come with me?” he asks me, then surprises me when he looks toward Dad as well.
“Of course. We’re here for you.”
“Thank you,” he sighs, the relief visible all over his face.
I walk next to him and press the back of my hand to his for a long moment when he slows down a little. Just up ahead in the hallway, I hear a door open, then an incredibly put together woman comes out. I know she’s Ru’s mom instantly. They have the same lips, the same eyes.
But then I hear him .
“Get him in here,” he shouts. “He needs to stop all this queer nonsense.”