Chapter 16
SIXTEEN
LELAND
“I think that went well,” I say when we reach the car.
“Did it?” Jackson asks, and I have absolutely no idea how he could sound slightly dubious.
“That teamwork you and I showed while we moved that body? Yes, yes, it did. But I’m a bit hung up on the guy,” I say as I put in a call to Tucker.
The man answers right away. “Uh… do you want the bad news or the even worse news?” he asks before I can say anything.
I “hmmm” a bit, like I’m thinking long and hard about this. “Like… is there a third choice of some good news?”
“The good news is you’re both still currently alive.”
“Okay… and maybe some more good news?” I’m fishing here at this point.
“That’s it.”
I sigh. “Hit me.”
“I’d love to hit you. Oh, you mean to tell you. Well… you know Teo Barlow?’
“Quite well, actually,” I say. “We had a rather… uh… unique chat just the other day.”
“Word going around here is that he was killed by the infamous Sandman. That the Sandman came in and slaughtered the whole group of them, including Raul Barlow’s precious son.”
“The son who was hiring me to kill Raul?” I ask, not quite sure how exactly this lines up. “Fuck… so either I was set up or they got wind of me being there, so they assume it was me…”
“Or your ‘biggest fan’ told them it was you,” Jackson says.
“You have to be fucking kidding me,” I growl. “Micah heard my name out and about the other day too. It’s not a coincidence.”
“I don’t think it is,” Tucker agrees. “Many thought the Sandman was dead, since you’ve been quiet for too many years.
So the idea of you coming out of retirement has everyone interested.
And then when they heard Raul Barlow wants you?
You know how many people would be happy to be on Barlow’s good side?
Hell, they’re over here with the idea that he’ll welcome them into the family if they deliver your head to him.
Things are going to get rough for you real soon. ”
“We need to find this guy who really killed Teo,” I say.
“And do what?” Jackson asks as he looks over at me.
“Deliver his head to Raul Barlow? Why kill a man who, as far as we know, has only killed bad people and hand him over to a man notorious for hurting good people? We know Raul is not a good person. This other guy, though? We only know that he killed a group of people who the police would love to destroy.”
“I wasn’t going to cater to Barlow. I just want this mystery man to pay for fucking me over. Tucker, we were jumped by about fifteen people just today. I assumed they were Barlow’s men but now I’m not certain. They’re in police custody now.”
“I’ll look into it, but I’m going to guess they’re for hire.”
“I think we’re going to be going on a road trip to deal with Raul Barlow,” I say. “If I get him off my back, there’s the possibility I can get the rest of the people off my back, and then we could just… dispose of Barlow Senior.”
“Or we could have Raul arrested,” Jackson suggests.
“They can arrest his deceased body,” I promise him. “I’ll even let you handcuff it.”
Jackson oddly doesn’t look thrilled by this idea. “Ha. Ha.”
“Tucker, keep us updated.”
“I actually have a mole in Barlow’s group… I try to keep tabs on the situation in all large groups. I could set you up a meeting with her, but I’m not positive it’ll help.”
“Sounds good.”
Once I’m done with him, I call Henry.
“What shit have you gotten into this time?” he grumbles. It’s almost like he doesn’t believe I’d call him just to wish him a wonderful day!
“You act like we get into that much stuff,” I say. “I’m almost offended.”
“Then tell me there’s nothing going on.”
“There’s not. We were swinging by the department, and I wanted to know if I could get you something for lunch.”
“Maybe some migraine relief for the migraine you’re going to inflict upon me when you tell me the truth,” he says with a sigh.
“I don’t think you can eat that.”
His next sigh is quite overkill, if you ask me. I fear he’s going to run out of air sighing so much, but he definitely doesn’t as he goes, “Lay it on me. Quickly.”
“Like… the sandwich? I usually only place food on Jackson’s body, but for you, I’d do it. You want a cheeseburger?”
“Fine. I’m ignoring everything else you just said.”
“Fries and drink?”
“Yeah.”
“Got it! See you in like ten minutes. Oh, and Raul Barlow has informed everyone that the Sandman killed his son, and now there are people after the Sandman who are convinced they can kill him. And I forgot to mention that we were attacked by a group of fifteen unidentified people at a rage room where Jackson was being his sexy self, and Sophia was also attacked and might have ended up with a code red. That’s when there’s like…
this… human-shaped… mass to take care of, you know?
And Patel waltzed in, and so we had to hide the unalive mass of human while she trotted around. ”
Silence.
“Henry?”
And then the phone beeps, telling me that the call has ended.
“Huh, he must have poor service,” I say.
“Definitely didn’t hang up on you,” Jackson teases.
“I can’t imagine he’d do that. He loves me.”
With burgers in tow, we head into the station and find Henry just standing in the foyer staring at us. It’s an odd kind of stare. One that says, “I have waited for this moment for my entire life” with a dash of “You are going to be the death of me.” Seems like a fun mix.
“You are the most Daddy of all store greeters,” I assure him.
He doesn’t seem to understand it, based on the way his face scrunches up.
Before we get far, Patel rushes onto the scene.
“Good, you two are here,” she says.
“I need them for a moment, Detective,” Henry tells her.
“We got you a burger, though!” I say as I hand her one of the bags. “Just pretend this burger is us. You can ask it all of the same questions, and you will likely get better answers than if you asked us directly.”
She stares at us, unimpressed, but takes the food and tries to hand me a twenty.
“Don’t worry about it,” I assure her.
“Where did all of your money come from, Leland?” she asks, like me buying a burger for her makes me suspiciously rich.
I wave the question off and then stuff a fry in my mouth. “I feel like we had this talk before. It’s just too boring, really.”
She’s apparently a masochist because she goes, “I love boring stories.”
“And I love hot food. Come on,” Henry says as he wanders off.
I hurry after him and link his arm with mine. His arm immediately stiffens, and he tries to cut off the circulation to my arm in the process, but I prevail (I always do). “I think Patel has it out for us. You think it’s because we hid a dead body while she was five feet from us?”
“Possibly,” he says as he takes us into his office and shuts the door. We get out the food and begin to eat while Henry sits there and stares at the wall. “My brain hurts whenever it comes to you two.”
“We’re going to visit Raul Barlow,” I say. “And then if he ends up… gone when we come back… no one will be any the wiser. It’ll be like he’s on vacation.”
“To hell,” Jackson inputs.
Henry strangely doesn’t find us funny in the slightest, even though I think we’re hilarious. “Patel is on your ass.”
I nod, unsure how he thinks that I might not have noticed. “I know she is.”
“If she sees something suspicious, she’s going to latch on.”
“We are never suspicious.”
“You were born suspicious,” he says. “I’m going with you.”
“To deal with Barlow?” I ask, wondering how toting him across the country makes us less suspicious. “Why?”
“To make sure you guys don’t get into any trouble.”
“Have we ever?”
“Every day,” he grumbles.
“How kind of you. But do you really think you should get involved? Your risk is so high, Henry,” I say as I unwrap his burger and guide it toward his mouth. “You might just be hungry and confused. Let Leland feed you.”
He shakes his head, evidently embarrassed by how much he wants me to feed him. “Dammit, I will feed myself.”
I sit down on his lap, grab his head in a headlock and zoom the burger toward him. “Henry, this will hurt so much less if you just comply.”
“You are a sadist, I hope you know that.”
“I’ve embraced it,” I say. “You’re going to stay here.
Actually, so can everyone. I will take Blow-Up Randy.
If he pops, I’ll reinflate him. The rest of you don’t reinflate as well.
I’ve tried blowing on Jackson’s valve, but I don’t think it’ll heal him if he gets hurt.
Does make him inflate, though. That is confirmed. ”
Henry’s entire body stiffens. “Christ. Get off my lap.”
“It’s so warm and comforting here,” I say as there’s one knock. “Come in!”
“Don’t answer for me, dammit!” Henry protests before Patel steps in to see me on Henry’s lap.
Her eyes narrow. She is jealous. She wants to sit on Henry’s lap, I can tell. “Is… there… I feel like I should leave,” she says.
“Leland wasn’t given much affection as a child, so he doesn’t quite understand how to be an adult,” Henry explains as he viciously pulls the burger from me before dumping me on the floor.
Instead of getting up, I lie there.
“Jackson, feed me,” I whisper.
Jackson drops a fry down on my face before carrying his food back to his seat.
“Patel, does your father treat you like this?” I ask her.
“I assure you, I would never be so intimate with my father,” she says.