23. Saturday, July 7, 2012
SATURDAY, JULY 7, 2012
J ulia spent the next few days discerning the next chapter for her business – starting with a quick day trip to Point Reyes on Saturday.
As usual, she brought the kids, hiking up to a bluff that overlooked the Pacific. Today, like most July days, fog swallowed the view. Between that, the chilly wind, and the strenuous hike, almost no one else was there. But Julia and the kids were used to strenuous hikes, and in preparation, they had stopped in Point Reyes Station for smoothies.
Now, Julia placed an envelope with her semi-annual letter to Rob and Tim on their bench, beneath the shade of a coastal cypress. The engraving on the beautifully carved seat back dedicated this bench to the memory of her uncles, with their dates of birth and death.
Twenty years ago, Julia, Rob, and the rest of their family scattered Tim’s ashes over this very bluff. That honor and duty fell to them, since Tim’s family had disowned him for being gay. The following year, Rob’s ashes joined Tim’s.
This bluff was where Rob and Tim fell in love. Julia still had the old photo of them from 1969, smiling in this very spot, their whole lives ahead of them. The ocean vista at their backs.
This was where Rob returned on Halloween, nineteen years ago, knowing his own death wa s imminent. This was where strangers found him, collapsed but still clinging to life, and to his memories of Tim.
The sacrifices Rob and Tim had made to be together were worth it, to them.
That night, over dinner, William was unusually quiet, even for him; but Julia knew he had as much on his mind as she did. He and his mother had spent Friday with Kelly and Pilar, sharing their conflicting feelings over how to support Mike without enabling his destructive tendencies. At the same time, William had respected Mike’s privacy by not breaking the news of his diagnosis. He would leave that to Mike.
“I made it clear I want no part in the enabling and codependency that used to play out in our family,” William reported, sitting beside Julia in the den after tucking Robert in. “I told them I’m happy to connect Mike with resources to support his sobriety. I’d even help him look for a job. But I won't give him money or pay his bills. I won't babysit him, ever again. I sure as hell won’t live with him. And if they allow him to move in, I wouldn’t support that – especially if Kelly lets him move in with her kids.”
Julia caught herself gaping and clamped her jaw shut. After a few moments to assess, William added, “It may sound harsh, but that’s what I grew up with – my parents letting Jimmy and Mike to turn our house into a meth den. Then, my parents and Kelly pressured me to babysit Mike when we were both grown-ass adults. That’s what you stumbled into in 2006 when we reconnected – remember?”
How could Julia forget? William and Mike lived together back then, and even played in a band together, just so William could keep an eye on his brother. It was William who made sure Mike took his meds every day; William who tried to ensure Mike stayed on the straight and narrow. And still, despite William’s best efforts, Mike wound up in the ICU after OD’ing and going into cardiac arrest.
“We’ve all been through a lot of therapy since then,” William added quietly, interrupting her unwelcome memories, “so luckily, they agreed.”
Julia blew out a breath of relief and disentangled one hand to stroke his bare forearm – the one with the compass tattoo. “I’m proud of you. Of all of you. ”
His eyes softened. “Thanks. Me too.”
“So what’s next?” she asked gently. “With you and Mike, I mean.”
Dragging his hand over his beard, William studied Paige’s latest painting, still drying on her easel. It was a bioluminescent moth, glowing in vibrant shades of jade, pink, and yellow against a field of midnight stars.
“I guess I'll meet with the asshole,” he sighed, and Julia couldn’t suppress her resounding guffaw.
Clapping her hand over her mouth, she barked out a muffled, “Sorry!”
He turned back to her with a smile. “Your daughter’s artistic talent reminds me of Mike’s. He’s so much more than his addiction, and in spite of everything he’s done, I love him.”
Melting at William’s vulnerability, Julia drew him in for a chaste kiss. When they pulled apart, a lock of hair escaped from her messy bun, and he tucked it behind her ear. Her heart tripped over itself, like it always did from that simple gesture.
“What about you?” he murmured. “How was your visit with Rob and Tim?”
“Good.” She leaned into the warm palm cupping her cheek and closed her eyes for a moment. “They already answered me.”
“Answered you?”
She nodded. “I always leave Rob and Tim a letter when I visit. This time, I asked them for some sign of what I was supposed to be doing at work. You know – what we talked about the other day.”
“You mean whether to hire an employee?”
“And how to expand the aquarium servicing side. I brought the watermelon tourmaline with me,” she added, reaching absently into her cardigan pocket to slide her thumb over its polished surface, “and I told the kids about it. What it meant to Rob, and to me. It reminded me all over again of everything Rob and Tim sacrificed to be together. I mean, Tim sacrificed his teaching career and even his whole family to be with Rob.”
William’s brows lifted in surprise.
“Not ‘sacrificed’ in some Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom way,” Julia joked. “Tim was born and raised in Fresno. His family was very religious and conse rvative. They disowned him. They even declined to claim his body when he died, so we handled everything. Thinking of all that reminded me of everything Rob taught me: don’t settle for anything less than everything. Believe that you deserve it. If it’s meant to be, the details will work themselves out. So on Monday, I’m dumping Chad the Fuckwad, to borrow your eloquent phrasing.”
“Aw, you mean I don’t get to piss on Fuckwad’s golf visor? But I was looking forward to it!”
“I’m pretty sure Rob would rise from the dead and slap me if I kept taking Fuckwad's money. And since I’d like Rob to keep resting in peace, I’m dumping Fuckwad and hiring an employee for the shop.”
Smiling, he brought both of her hands to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “I’m proud of you, too, Julie.”
“Look at us, growing older and wiser!”
“Speak for yourself. I’m just growing wiser.”
She laughed, but when his grin abruptly straightened, so did hers. She rubbed his shoulder, and it seemed to snap him out of whatever zone he had entered. He kissed her hand again. “I’m okay. Just, you mentioning an employee reminded me – Stephen handed in his resignation, effective immediately.”
“What?! Why?”
“He claims it’s because he got a new sous chef job. But honestly, I think it has more to do with Izumi.”
Julia blinked. “Izumi?”
“They’ve been trying to hide it from me, but they’ve been dating. I mean, he showed up with her to Kelly’s wedding, for Christ’s sake. Did they really expect me not to notice? But he was way more into her than she was into him, and I think he got his heart broken.”
“So he quit without notice because they broke up?”
Grunting in confirmation, William leaned forward, rested his elbows on his knees, and pinched his mouth and nose between his palms. “And now I have no deckhand for my trip tomorrow.”
A jolt of inspiration straightened Julia’s spine. “Sure you do. Me. ”
William lifted an eyebrow. “You?”
“Don’t sound so skeptical,” Julia laughed. “I hate to bring it up, but Kevin’s parents own a virtual fleet of boats. Between that and my college internships, I practical ly lived on boats during my twenties. Plus...” As if answering a summons, she raised her hand. “Marine biology major? I can back up Izumi on interpretation.”
But William shook his head. “No, I can’t subject Izumi to yet another awkward situation after she just escaped from one.”
“Did you just call me an awkward situation?”
“Absolutely.”
She snickered. “So you acknowledge I was right – Izumi’s got it bad for you.”
William gave a sheepish wince. “After the way she ran out of Kelly and Pilar’s reception when she saw us holding hands? I’ve definitely been keeping my distance from her.”
Julia pondered his dilemma. “So what are you going to do about tomorrow, if you don’t use me?”
His stumped silence spoke volumes. Finally, he admitted, “I guess I’ll have to cancel the trip. And every trip this week until I find a new deckhand.”
With a gasp, Julia’s face lit up in inspiration.
“Oh, no,” William groaned. “I can just hear your gears turning.”
“Hear me out, okay?”
“Against my better judgment? Okay.”
Steeling herself, Julia said, “Kevin.”
William frowned. “What about him?”
“He’s in the Bay Area right now because he had an appointment with a new GI specialist at Stanford.”
“Oh – no way.” William shook his head and lifted his hands, as if to ward off the idea.
“What? I told you, his parents have their own private navy. He practically grew up on boats. And again – marine biology major.”
“What part of ‘awkward situation’ did you not understand?”
“Oh, stop,” she teased. “Are you going to sue yourself for creating a hostile work environment?”
“I might. And if not, I’m sure Kevin will.”
Julia tsk ed. “I thought you two hugged it out.”
“Are you psychotic?”
“Yes. ”
“I know, because you’re hallucinating.”
“But they’re visions for good, not evil.”
He actually guffawed. “I have not, nor will I ever, ‘hug anything out’ with Kevin.”
Julia sucked her teeth again and rolled her eyes in mock disdain. “Fine, but still, just hear me out, okay?”
He crossed his arms over his chest and shot her some world-class side-eye. But amusement twitched at the corners of his mouth.
“Look,” she continued, “if he’s available and willing, maybe Kevin can fill in tomorrow so you don’t have to cancel on your passengers and lose that income. Then you’d have all day Monday to search for a permanent replacement.”
“I’m sure Kevin is eminently qualified, but even if I felt comfortable hiring him, my liability insurance won’t allow me to take someone on who isn’t fully vetted and trained. I could lose my captain’s license and my whole business.”
“But that’s what I'm telling you – Kevin is fully vetted and trained. He has a bona fide deckhand certification.” When William still hesitated, she added, “Surely you can suck it up for one single day?”
Still, he shook his head. “It will take more than a day to hire a permanent replacement.”
Sighing, she gently cupped his cheek in her palm. “Just let me talk to him. That way, at least you’ll have the option. You don’t have to hire him if you still don’t want to.”
After another moment’s hesitation, he gave a reluctant nod, and she kissed him.
Then, after walking him to the door and kissing him goodnight, she drew a deep breath for courage and placed the call to Kevin.
The first words out of his mouth were, “Is everything okay?” Julia rarely called him unexpectedly unless something was up with the kids.
“Yes, everything's fine. I just have a rather unusual question for you. Hear me out, okay?” she added, for the third time that night.
“Okay?”
Squeezing her eyes shut, she dove right in. “Are you available and willing to fill in tomorrow as a deckhand on William’s boat?” When Kevin barked out an actual lau gh, she blurted the rest out before she lost her nerve. “And maybe also all of next week?”
“What field, besides the left one, is this coming out of?” But his tone was placid. Amused, even.
“His deckhand quit on him today with no notice. Not because of William,” she added hastily. “It was... personal stuff. But the end result is, Will needs someone to fill in immediately, or he’ll have to cancel his excursions for the next week. Maybe longer.”
“Starting tomorrow,” Kevin said flatly.
“Yes, and since you’re already in town, and you have a certification... I mean, even if it’s only for tomorrow. I know you have to fly back to Santa Barbara after tomorrow.”
A two-beat rest. “Actually, I don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Have to be back in Santa Barbara next week. Any loose ends I need to tie up on my dissertation, I can do from Atherton.”
Julia’s mouth fell open. “So you’d actually consider it? Helping William?”
“As long as William is cool with it, too, it might even be fun.”
Julia gave a single, incredulous laugh. “William hasn’t decided for sure if he wants to bring on a temporary deckhand, but if he does, he’s cool with it being you.”
“Just let me know the next steps.”
“Of course,” she rushed out breathlessly. “I’ll give William your contact information, if that’s okay. And... thank you.”
“You’re welcome, Julia. Have a good weekend.” And for the first time in years, he sounded truly at peace.