Chapter 9
CHAPTER NINE
NATALIE
Best. Kiss. Of. My. Life.
Of course Maddox Holiday could kiss. He’d barely kissed me after the party and I’d thought about it all day yesterday. That had been nothing more than a touch. Whatever expectations I’d had were destroyed with one sweep of his tongue across my bottom lip.
Maddox’s hands stayed firm on my face, holding me against his mouth as I melted into a puddle.
My knees weakened. A moan escaped my throat.
He took advantage and slid inside, his taste exploding on my tongue. The heat from his mouth was heady. A dizziness washed over me as his mouth slanted over mine. So lost in the feel of him, I just stood there. Motionless. Stupefied. A woman on the verge of becoming goo.
Was this a dream? Maybe I was dreaming. Kiss him back. Why wasn’t I kissing him back?
Before I had the chance to tangle my tongue with his, he pulled away, dropping his forehead to mine.
No, I was just getting ready to kiss him back .
“Natalie, I?—”
“Kiss me again,” I blurted, then rose up on my toes and tossed my arms around his shoulders, holding on tight.
He didn’t miss a beat. He slammed his mouth down on mine and whatever sweetness had been in that first kiss morphed into sinful, delicious lust. Maddox devoured me, his tongue dueling with mine.
My fingers dove into the thick strands of his hair, tugging and toying while I poured everything I had into this kiss.
If this was all I’d have of Maddox Holiday, damn it, I was going to make an impression. For us both.
Maddox’s arms banded around my back and he picked me up off my feet, carrying me to the nearest wall.
My legs wrapped around his narrow hips as he pressed my spine against the surface. I clung to him, my mouth never leaving his. We kissed for what felt like hours, until my core throbbed and I ached for more.
He arched his hips, digging his arousal into my center for one blissful second before he tore his mouth away. “Fuck.”
“Yes, please.”
Maddox shook his head. “I wanted to kiss you on Saturday. But this... damn, you can kiss, Nat.”
Oh, thank God. If the only thing I achieved in this life was Maddox thinking I was a good kisser, I’d die a happy woman. “I used to practice on my arm when I was a teenager.”
He grinned and set me down on unsteady legs. “What else did you practice when you were a teenager?”
“That’s for me to know and you to find out. Though let’s just say it involved a banana.”
“Natalie,” he groaned. “You’re killing me here.”
“What? I make excellent banana bread. Someone told me once that men loved banana bread.”
He threw his head back and laughed .
What a sight he was when he laughed. It transformed his face from the stoic businessman to this blindingly beautiful man.
When he looked at me again, he was still laughing, the dimple on full display. Because I might not have another chance, I reached up and touched it with a fingertip.
Maddox’s fingers threaded through the hair at my temples. “Why didn’t you come today?”
“Because as much as you wanted to kiss me on Saturday, I wanted it ten times over. I couldn’t do that to Violet. She needs you. And...”
The truth was so freaking embarrassing. I didn’t really want to tell Maddox about the past, but I didn’t want him to find out from any other person.
“And what?”
“I’ve made this mistake before,” I admitted with a cringe. “I can’t do it again.”
“Again?” His forehead furrowed. “With a father?”
I sighed and walked past him, leading the way to the living room couch.
He followed, sitting beside me.
“When I was eighteen, I started working for a single dad. Deacon,” I said, keeping my eyes trained forward on the coffee table. Not many knew this story because it was humiliating. “He had twin boys who were seven. His divorce was new, or so I’d thought. Deacon’s ex-wife wasn’t around much but the boys talked about her all the time. I didn’t think a thing of it because I never saw her at the house. I assumed she just lived in town.”
When it came to the twins, I’d only ever dealt with Deacon. He’d been at the house to greet me each morning before leaving for work, and he’d been home every night at five-thirty so I could go home before dinner.
“It was just for the summer. It was more like babysitting and my first full-time job before I’d gone to work for Cathy. I was watching the twins while school was on break.”
“He wasn’t divorced, was he?”
I shook my head. “No, he wasn’t. His wife was a journalist and she’d been given an assignment in Italy for the summer. I didn’t know.”
Maddox put his hand on my shoulder. “Nat, this isn’t on you.”
“I know.” I gave him a sad smile. It had taken me years to realize that I’d been Deacon’s prey. He’d been a handsome, older man who’d known exactly what to say to lure me into his bed. I’d slept with that man three times before learning that his wife had been out of town but very much still his wife.
I’d kept the affair a secret for a few years, finally admitting it to Judy after she’d married Dad. Cathy knew too because I’d wanted to be completely up front with her when I’d applied to work for her agency.
Otherwise, no one knew and I was certain that Deacon wasn’t gossiping. Last I heard he was still married.
“When I found out about his wife, I quit immediately. The worst part was knowing that I’d betrayed those boys. They’d trusted me, and I’d gotten wrapped up in their father. He was a bastard for lying to me, but I should have known better. And that’s on me. I can’t go there again. Certainly not with you.”
“With me?”
“I like you, Maddox. I’ve always liked you. I don’t know if you want to explore this or not?—”
“I do.”
Relief coursed through my veins. “Then I can’t be the nanny. Violet needs someone who’s only about her. She deserves that.”
“Agreed.” He took one of my hands. “You’re fired.”
I laughed. “I already quit. And I have an apology aloe to prove it.”
“Go on a date with me.”
“But what about Violet?”
“She can find her own date.”
I swatted his arm. “You know that’s not what I mean.”
“I know.” Maddox shifted, inching closer. “But hear me out.”
“Okay.”
“Violet is and will always be my priority. Everything you just said about her needing someone that’s only about her is right. And it’s sexy as hell that you care enough about my daughter to walk away. But...”
He straightened, sitting taller. His gaze locked with mine and sheer determination was written on his face. This was the Maddox who led a billion-dollar company. This was the man in charge, ready to make his case.
Talk about sexy as hell.
“Violet doesn’t have a lot of positive female relationships. She’s had some great teachers. My mom. But thanks to Cece and her other nannies, she’s seen a lot of women walk out of her life.”
My hand pressed against my heart, aching for his girl. “I hate that for her.”
“I hate that for her too.” He gave me a sad smile. “I want her to know there are kind, caring women in this world. That you’re one of them. So go on a date with me and spend time with Violet. It doesn’t have to be one or the other.”
“You are extremely convincing.” A smile tugged at my mouth. “Do you always get your way?”
“Usually.” He chuckled. “Is that a yes?”
“Yes.” A date with Maddox. My heart skipped. “When?”
“Is tonight too soon? ”
“Not really.”
“Good. I’ll pick you up at six.”
“Actually, what if I came over? I feel awful for ditching Violet today and I have a present for her too.” It was candy and a coloring book.
“Whatever you want.” Maddox brought my hand to his mouth, kissing my knuckles. Then he stood. “I’d better get back. Make sure Violet hasn’t chased Cathy out of the house. See you tonight?”
“Yes.” I escorted him to the door with a smile so wide it pinched my cheeks.
“One more.” He pulled me into his arms, kissing me again and giving me one more taste before leaving to go home.
I waited, watching from the threshold until his Audi was out of sight. Then I closed the door and screamed. “Ahh!”
Maddox had kissed me.
Maddox Holiday, the hottest man I’d ever known, had freaking kissed me.
I ran around the house screaming with my hands waving above my head. I was in the middle of a happy dance on the couch when the front door opened. My heart dropped to my feet as I shoved the hair out of my face, hoping above all hope that Maddox hadn’t forgotten something and had decided to come back.
No, it was just my father. He didn’t believe in knocking.
“What are you doing?” Dad gave me a sideways look. In his arms was the potted houseplant I’d left at his place yesterday.
“He kissed me.” I hopped down from the couch. “I had to celebrate.”
“Judy!” Dad bellowed over his shoulder.
“I’m right here, Garrett.” She scowled at him as she shoved past him and stepped inside. “Do you always have to shout? ”
Dad had two volumes. Loud and super loud. But his deep, boisterous voice always made me smile.
“She’s talking about kissing,” he said. “That’s not my department.”
I rolled my eyes. “You pretend like you didn’t give me the sex talk when I was twelve.”
“And I still have nightmares about that, so if we’re celebrating you kissing someone, I’m out.” Without another word, Dad set the plant on the tiled entryway beside my potted aloe, then backed out of the door, closing it behind him.
“We’re celebrating a kiss?” Judy asked, taking off her coat.
“Yes.” I jumped back up on the couch and did another shimmy. “Maddox kissed me.”
I spent the next thirty minutes telling Judy everything, from my crush in high school, to being hired as Violet’s nanny, to the party, to the kiss. When I was done, she texted Dad and told him it was safe to come inside—he’d been hanging out in the car, listening to a true crime podcast.
“So is he the reason you were in a bad mood yesterday?” Judy asked.
“I wasn’t in a bad mood.”
“Okay, not exactly bad. But you weren’t yourself.”
We’d spent Christmas together yesterday, per our tradition, eating and watching movies. I’d lazed the entire day away on Judy and Dad’s couch. Maybe there’d been a little sulking too over Maddox and the phone call I’d had to make to Cathy to quit.
When I’d finally peeled myself off their couch at midnight, I’d trudged home, leaving my gifts behind—the snake plant Dad had brought over and a personalized recipe binder Judy had filled with her favorites. She was still holding out hope that one day I’d become a fantastic cook, like she was. She failed to forget that I’d once exploded a hot dog in the microwave .
“What are you wearing on your date?” Judy asked.
“I don’t know yet.”
“Do I know this guy?” Dad asked.
“Maddox Holiday.”
He raised his eyebrows. “As in Madcast, Maddox Holiday?”
“The one and only.” This was a fantasy. This was a dream.
“What’s he like?” Judy asked.
“Nice. Smart. Sofreakinghot.”
“Do I need to leave again?” Dad asked, hooking a thumb over his shoulder toward the door.
I smiled. “Maddox has a seven-year-old daughter and she’s a spitfire. I sort of love that she isn’t an angel.”
Judy put a hand on Dad’s leg, looking up to him with a smile. “I sort of love that your daughter isn’t an angel either.”
“What are you talking about? I’m an angel.”
She scoffed as Dad studied a speck on his jeans.
“I’ve always been a good girl.”
“Sweetheart, do you not remember how we met?” she asked.
“We met at dinner. In this house.”
“Technically, yes. We had dinner. But the first time I saw you was when you were toilet papering the neighbor’s yard.”
“Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.” I held up a hand. “You can’t prove that was me.”
Dad pulled his lips in to hide a smile.
In all the years since Judy had been a part of Dad’s life, I had yet to, and would never, admit guilt of that night. Besides, it wasn’t like I’d actually toilet papered Mrs. Henderson’s yard. I’d simply ensured that she’d had an adequate TP supply since she’d kept sending her puppy over to poop on Dad’s front lawn.
I’d been living at home at the time, saving money for when I decided to quit nannying and enroll at Montana State. Dad had brought Judy home after one of their early dates, wanting to introduce the two of us. An hour before they’d showed up, I’d come home and walked to the front door, texting and not paying attention. It had been dark and I’d been in my favorite pair of tennis shoes. My foot had splattered in a huge pile of fresh puppy shit.
That had been the final straw.
So I’d gone inside and decked myself out in head-to-toe black. Then I’d waited for the Hendersons’ light to go off before staging my attack. It hadn’t been your typical toilet papering. No, I’d scooped up every pile of puppy poo and made a little mountain of it in Mrs. Henderson’s yard. Then I’d built a pyramid out of toilet paper beside it.
Because I was an angel.
The only actually toilet papering had been done to a shrub. The smallest shrub in her yard because I was nice like that. I’d been winding down that single roll when Dad and Judy had pulled into the driveway.
Dad had been talking about Judy nonstop for days, and the moment she’d stepped out of the car, laughing at something Dad had said, I’d panicked and raced down the block. I’d killed two hours in the elementary school playground waiting to make sure she’d gone home.
Two days later, when Dad had arranged a do-over introduction, Judy had showed up with a pack of Charmin Ultra-Soft.
The next day, she’d come back, this time bearing homemade chocolate cake and I’d instantly given Dad my approval.
He’d married her four days later and they’d moved into Judy’s house. Instead of selling this home to a stranger, he’d rented it to me so I wouldn’t have to move.
Mrs. Henderson still lived next door. As far as I knew, she had no idea it was me who’d left the toilet paper. I’d cleaned it up the next day because I’d felt bad. Her dog still pooped in my yard. And I still piled it in hers.
“Any word on Magdalena?” Dad asked. He didn’t love the bus, because it had been Mom’s, but he also hadn’t sold it because after Mom had abandoned me, I’d used Magdalena as my childhood fort. Then when I’d been old enough to drive, we’d gotten her working.
“No.” I sighed and collapsed on the couch by his side. “I’m worried, Dad. What if they can’t resuscitate her?”
“She’s a car, kiddo.”
I gasped and shot him a glare. “How dare you talk that way about Magdalena?”
“Do you need money for Magdalena ?”
Yes . “No.”
I’d planned to use the money made from watching Violet for the mechanic. But now that would have to wait. I could dip into my school savings, but I’d made myself a promise years ago when I’d started saving never to raid the college stash.
“I’ve been thinking about school.”
Judy sat straighter, looking past Dad to my face. “And?”
“I think it’s time. As much as I like watching kids, it’s not the long-term goal.” And maybe telling my dreams to Maddox, a man who was wildly successful, made me want to finally start chasing them.
To afford it all, I might need to sell Magdalena. An older-model Subaru like Dad’s would be less expensive to maintain and more dependable in the winter.
Dependable. Blech.
“We’re here for you.” Dad smiled. “Whatever you need.”
“Thanks.” I rested my head on his shoulder.
“What time is your date?” Judy asked.
“Six. ”
“We’re going to Costco,” Dad said. “Want to come with us?”
“No, I’d better stay and get ready.”
He checked his watch. “You have hours.”
“There’s a lot that needs to happen before a first date. I’ll need to take another shower and wash my hair. Exfoliate. Shave my legs in case?—”
“Come on, Judy.” Dad bolted off the couch and strode for the door.
“You torture him.” Judy laughed, standing to follow.
I giggled. “He makes it too easy.”
We hugged goodbye, and then I did another victory lap around the house, dancing and cheering, before I spent the rest of the day on my laptop, going through the application for school.
When I had an hour left, I took my second shower for the day so I could wash my hair and shave my legs. Then I collected the aloe plant, Violet’s bag of jellybeans and her book to take with me as I headed across town to meet Maddox.
The honeybees in my stomach swarmed when I pulled into the driveway. “I can’t believe this is happening.”
This was happening.
I was going on a date with Maddox.
I smiled as I walked to the stoop, reaching for the bell only to have the door yanked open before I could touch the button.
“Hey.” Maddox was a vision, his dark hair finger-combed. He was dressed like he had been earlier in a pair of jeans and a black sweater. The dark color made the piercing blue of his eyes pop.
“Hi.” I handed over the plant and came inside, shedding my coat. I’d opted for jeans too and high-heeled boots with a caramel sweater .
“You look beautiful.” He kissed my cheek, lingering for a moment with his lips by my ear.
“Thanks.” I leaned into him, dragging in the spicy scent of his cologne.
“Hi, Nat.”
I pulled away from Maddox as Heath came striding through the entryway. “Hi.”
“How’s it going?”
“Good.” I studied his face, wondering if he remembered that I’d caught him sucking Stella’s nipples at the party.
If he did, we weren’t going to talk about it, which was fine by me. “So are you here for game night?”
“Uh . . .”
“Slight change in plan.” Maddox gave me a pained look. “Mom and Dad declared tonight family game night.”
“ Mandatory family game night,” Heath said, raising a half-full tumbler. “But there is alcohol.”
“You don’t have to stay.” Maddox’s hand dragged along the back of my arm. His featherlight touch left a trail of tingles in its wake. “But if you’re up for it...”
“I’m very competitive. And I show no mercy.”
He grinned. “Bring it on, Buchanan.”
An hour later, I was officially dominating the Holiday game night.
“Who invited you again?” Heath asked as he shuffled the cards.
“Me,” Maddox grumbled, rearranging his short stack of chips. It was clear he was just as competitive as I was, and the fact that I’d just won a huge poker hand was grating on him.
After surveying the massive collection of board games, we’d all decided on a Texas Hold’em tournament so we could all play the same game. Hannah and Keith. Maddox. Heath. Violet. Tobias was nowhere in sight but I hadn’t wanted to ask why he’d shirked the attendance mandate.
“How are we doing?” I asked Violet. She’d declared herself my teammate early on in the game. According to Maddox, she’d had a nice day with Cathy. Though she’d told me I was funner .
“Seventeen, eighteen”—the clay chips clinked together as she stacked them—“nineteen blue ones.”
Blue chips were worth one hundred fake dollars and there were only thirty in play.
“Excellent.” I sent Maddox a malicious grin.
He glowered as Heath dealt the next hand.
Hannah had lost out early and was perfectly content to be the cheerleader for Violet and me. Judging by chips stacks, Keith was in second place. Heath had a similar stack to his father’s. And then there was Maddox, dead last.
“Where did you learn to play poker, Natalie?” Hannah asked.
“My dad and I love playing card games. He taught me how to play when I was a kid.”
“He did a good job.” Keith picked up his cards, then tossed them back to the table. “I fold.”
I showed my cards—a two and a seven—to Violet. She shook her head and I tossed them down. “We fold too.”
“Why are we even playing?” Heath asked. “We should just declare Natalie the winner and move on to something else.”
“Agreed.” Maddox tossed his cards down. “I vote for any other game besides poker.”
“Can I pick, Nana?” Violet asked.
“Sure.” Hannah took her hand and the two of them went to the cupboard, browsing the massive collection of board games.
Maddox stood from his chair and nodded for me to follow him into the kitchen .
I hurried after him, checking over my shoulder that we were alone.
He walked without hesitation to the pantry. Hannah had brought out an enormous spread for us to graze on during the games, so I had no idea how he could be hungry after all of that but I followed.
“What are you?—”
He snatched my hand and tugged me into the tiny room, gripping the back of my neck with one hand while the other pulled the door shut. Then his mouth was on mine, his lips greedy. His hands threaded into my hair while mine roamed his chest, my palms dragging against the hard lines of his body.
A groan escaped his lips.
A mewl came from mine.
He pressed me against the pantry’s shelves, his arousal digging into my hip. “Fuck, I’ve wanted to do that all night.”
“Good, then do it again.”
He obeyed, wrapping me in his arms as his tongue twisted and tangled with mine. I was practically climbing him when he tore his mouth away just as the door whipped open.
Please don’t be Violet.
“There’s someone here for you,” Heath said quickly, then slammed the door shut.
“Damn.” Maddox sighed. “This was not how I wanted our first date to go. Sneaking around in my parents’ house. Sorry.”
I laughed and stood on my toes to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. “Don’t be. I’m having a blast.”
“I’m glad you’re here. But tomorrow, let’s try this again. Dinner. Just the two of us.”
“It’s a date.” I smiled as he dragged his thumb across my mouth before stalking out of the pantry.
I followed behind him, almost through the kitchen when a laugh carried through the house. A laugh that made Maddox freeze midstride.
“What?” I asked, nearly colliding with his back.
He closed his eyes and his jaw clenched.
“Maddox.”
The carefree, fluid grace in his body disappeared. When he took off for the living room, his shoulders were bunched, and his hands fisted by his sides.
I followed, not sure what the problem was until I heard a word that made my heart stop.
“Mommy!”
No. My stomach plummeted.
We walked into the living room to see Hannah and Keith glaring at their newest guest—their anger barely contained—as Violet threw her arms around a beautiful brunette.
The woman straightened when she spotted Maddox, keeping one hand on Violet’s shoulder. “Hey, Mad.”
Mad.
Yes. Yes, he was.
“Cece,” he clipped.
“Merry Christmas.”
“Christmas was yesterday.”
She smiled, oblivious or purposefully ignorant to the tension in the room. But when her gaze drifted past Maddox to me, the smile vanished. “Who are you?”
I opened my mouth to answer, but Violet beat me to it. “That’s Natalie. She’s my nanny.”
Cece huffed. “You always loved the nannies, didn’t you, Maddox?”
Ouch. Well played, Cece.
So much for game night.