Chapter 12
“Oh, How They Pound, Raising the Sound”
“Coming!” Wren rushed to the front door as someone’s pounding fist shook the snow off the awning of her house.
She flung open the door and Greyson stood there, fist suspended in midair. His narrowed glare snapped to her face as he thrust the check forward. “What the hell is this?”
She rolled her eyes, leaving the door open behind her. “You Hawthornes sure know how to make an entrance. Did you ever hear of a phone?”
“Cut the crap, Wren. I went to grab a coffee in town this morning, and several busybodies told me you put on quite the show last night at Jocelyn’s event. Mind filling me in?”
She picked up her mug, hiding behind it like a shield. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, you don’t? Well, let me clue you in. Apparently, you and a horny elf got into a bidding war for my brother last night at Hook, Wine, & Sinker. You put on quite the spectacle and ended up mopping the floor with her.” He leaned close and growled, “You severely overpaid, by the way.”
“Actually, I didn’t pay. You did.”
“Yeah, about that. It’s not fucking happening. Soren can buy his own sorry ass.”
“I’m afraid there’s no way out of it now. I told Jocelyn you’d endorse the check, and you know how she is. She takes her town fundraising very seriously.”
“I’m not using my paycheck to buy my brother so you can date him.”
“Technically, it came from an unclaimed paycheck. You said you didn’t want it, so why do you care what the money goes toward?”
He took a menacing step forward, then stilled as if catching himself. “You’re not baiting me today.” Tossing the check on the counter, he said, “Tear it up.”
“Can’t.”
“Wren.”
“Greyson, just because you growl at me doesn’t mean you get your way.”
They held each other’s stare for an excruciating few seconds as the threat in his eyes darkened. “You know the rumors aren’t gonna stop. This is just the beginning. You ready for that?”
Her stomach twisted. As much as she hated being the center of Hideaway Harbor gossip, there was no avoiding it now. Not only did Soren come with a ridiculous price tag, but he kissed her like he was claiming territory. Greyson got his brother’s message loud and clear.
She shrugged. If he planned to act unaffected, she could also pretend. She played it off as if the attention didn’t bother her. “Soren does what Soren wants.”
“Oh!” he laughed. “Is that what you think they’re talking about? That’s not how I heard it. No one’s talking about Soren.”
Her shoulders fell. “What do you mean?”
“They’re talking about you, how aggressively you bid on him, how you wouldn’t let the other women have a shot, how your bid was, by far, the highest of the night.” He cocked his head. “You made a public claim, Wren, and that’s how they saw it.”
She looked up at him in panic. “No. On some level, they all knew it was a joke—”
“Maybe they would have, but not after…” His words faded away as he searched her face. “Did you do it? Did you kiss him?”
An avalanche of shame swept over her as hurt flashed in his eyes. “Soren—”
“Did you fucking kiss him, Wren?” he snapped, wanting only the truth. “You either shoved him away or…” His jaw ticked as the air crackled with tension, as if he couldn’t bear to even finish the question. “Did it mean something to you?”
“It was a joke, Grey. We’re just friends.”
“That’s not what you said yesterday.”
“That’s because you pushed me away, and I wanted to push back.”
“I told you I don’t play games.”
“Then be direct with me! What do you want?”
The air sparked with a mixture of tension and aggression. He appeared upset but also angry.
“Answer me, Greyson. Everything you’ve ever asked of me, I’ve given you, yet you can’t even give me an explanation about what we’re doing. What is this?”
He closed the distance, quickly rounding the counter. She took a step back and looked up at him. Shaking under his hard, punishing stare.
“I deserve the truth, Grey.”
His nostrils flared, and his mouth formed a flat line. “Fine. I can’t be your friend anymore.”
His words cleaved through her heart like a blade, knocking her off balance as her vision blurred with unshed tears. “Get out.”
He caught her arm. “No. I warned you. Once crossed, some lines can’t be uncrossed.”
She did this. She ruined everything. Looking down, she nodded. He needed to leave before she completely fell apart. “Please, just go.”
His laugh turned cold. “You think you’re getting rid of me now? You made me your problem.”
Her stare jumped to his, confused. “I thought—”
He sealed his mouth to hers, demanding and possessive, tasting of coffee and desperation, his stubble rough against her skin as if trying to erase the memory of all other kisses that came before. Tears sprang to her eyes, but now for different reasons.
Was this really happening? Had Jocelyn’s advice actually worked?
She pulled back in shock, afraid she was reading him wrong. “Are you sure?”
“No,” he admitted. “But I don’t have a choice.”
She frowned, confused by his answer.
Tinsel peeked out of his coat collar and meowed. “Not now, Rat.” He stuffed the kitten back into the shelter of his jacket.
“You’re still calling him that?”
“It’s his name.”
She untangled herself from his hold. “I think we should talk.”
“I don’t want to talk.”
“Well, I do.”
He yanked her close again. “I’m through talking.”
“Greyson, stop. You can’t keep distracting me with kisses whenever I ask for a real explanation of your feelings.”
He released her to pace the tiny kitchen. “I’m not Soren. I don’t perform.”
“I’m not asking you to perform. I’m asking you to be honest about your feelings for once and have a real conversation with me.”
Tinsel climbed out of his coat, using his body as a jungle gym.
Wren wasn’t going to be distracted. She’d waited him out for fifteen years. After everything that happened, he owed her an explanation. Soren was willing to open up. The least Greyson could do was admit he cared on some level.
Several minutes passed in unmoving silence as she waited for him to talk.
“Say something!” she finally snapped.
“Are you into him?” he barked, his anger startling her. “Honesty, Wren. I want the truth.”
“So do I.”
The hard glint in his eye told her he wouldn’t confess anything unless she talked first. But what if she confessed her feelings and he rejected her all over again. She wouldn’t be able to bear it.
“You know I like you, Grey—”
“Do. You. Like. Soren?”
She swallowed around the lump in her throat. “I don’t know.”
For once, Greyson didn’t look unaffected. “I see.” He only took a small step back but it felt like an uncrossable abyss forming between them.
Tears rushed to her eyes. “You’re the one who told me to date whoever I wanted.”
“I did.” He scooped Tinsel off his shoulder and subdued him with a scratch between his ears. “Soren’s a good guy.”
“Don’t do that!” she snapped. “If you don’t want me to date him or kiss him, then make me a better offer. You know you have an advantage.”
“Yeah, right.”
She scoffed. “You say you want the truth, but you’re too afraid to give it back. You know there’s a difference, Greyson. Everybody knows. And if you’re really going to stand here and deny it, then you’re the one lying.”
“You have no experience with these things—”
“Why?” she snapped. “Because I’m a virgin?
This isn’t about fucking, Greyson! This is about honesty.
It’s about communication.” The word love rested on the tip of her tongue, but she couldn’t bring herself to say it.
“I’m literally right here, waiting for you to admit how you feel, but you won’t.
I’ve waited a lifetime for you to confess you care about me, but you just keep pushing me away. ”
“Because you’re you!” he yelled. “I’ve been protecting you from assholes all my life.”
“You’re not an asshole!”
“I am! If you knew what lived in my head—”
“Oh, please, Greyson. I know you better than anyone. You’re not a bad guy.”
“I’m not a good guy either. What you want, Wren, what you deserve, I won’t be able to give it to you.”
“You don’t know the first thing about what I want.”
“I know you as well as you know me.”
“Well, you don’t know the future. You’re so afraid of disappointing me, you won’t even try.”
“Because I know enough.”
“So, what? You want to fuck me but not be with me?”
“No. That’s the exact opposite of what I want.”
“You do want to be with me? But not have sex?”
He raked a hand through his hair. “No one’s having sex.”
“Well, I’d like to.”
He glared at her, and she scoffed.
“I’m sorry if that’s upsetting for you to hear, Grey, but I’m tired of being alone. I want someone to come home to, someone to ask me about my day. I want to be kissed and touched and treated like a woman deserves to be treated. You have this delicate image of me that just doesn’t exist anymore.”
She crossed the kitchen, needing to touch him. “Your dad got it wrong, Greyson. Loving someone or showing emotion does not make you weak.”
“This isn’t about that.”
“Yes, it is. Magnus is sick. All those feelings you had when you lost your mom, they’re starting to repeat.” She squeezed his arms. “Salting the roads won’t save him, Grey.”
His brow creased as he looked away.
Their mothers would still be alive if the salt trucks had shown up that night. Since then, Greyson made it his job to keep everyone in Hideaway Harbor safe. But no amount of salt could save his dad, and there wasn’t time to fix the parts of their relationship that were broken.
“You always took care of me, Grey, even at the height of my grief. I let you in. I let you see the ugliest sides of me, and you didn’t run. Do you think I would abandon you? All I’ve ever wanted was for you to let me in. Let me help you with everything you’re feeling.”
His tense, pensive stare averted hers, but by the way his shoulders moved with every breath, she knew he absorbed every word.
“Let me in, Greyson. Let me be there for you so you don’t have to go through this alone.” She gently rubbed his back as the kitten played on his shoulder. “I want to comfort you, to be everything you need, but first you have to be honest about the things you’re feeling.”
As always, silence followed.
“Please, Grey. Just talk to me.”
He looked ready to shatter, every muscle coiled with the effort of holding himself together, and then something shifted. That ever-present mask of composure slid back into place. “I have nothing to say.”
He broke her heart. “Go home, Greyson. You don’t get to be jealous and still shut me out.”
She stepped back, and he caught her hand. “Wait.” Something desperate flashed in his eyes. “I’m trying, Wren. But I honestly don’t know what you want me to say.” His hand tightened around hers.
“What do you feel for me, Greyson?”
His breath turned labored as he tried to find the right words. “Everything! Too much.” He pressed a fist to his chest. “You touch me, and I forget how to breathe.”
It was the first time he ever honestly gave her any sort of confirmation. Relief left her shaken, her knees threatening to buckle under the weight of fifteen years of hoping. “It’s the same for me.”
Waiting for Greyson to think through his feelings felt like waiting for the glaciers to shift from one side of the ocean to the other, but when he finally found the right words, they hit a million times harder than all the painful silences.
He shook his head, still unsatisfied with his words. “I forget how to stop myself.”
“Then don’t.”
“You deserve better—”
“I don’t want better.”
“One day you’ll need it though, and I’ll let you down.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I do.” He looked at her then, his eyes desperate to get through to her, but his mouth unable to speak the words he wanted to say. “You’re perfect, Wren.”
“I’m not—“
“But you are. To me, you are.”
She looked down and untied the sash of her robe, letting it drop like a whisper to the floor.
“What are you doing?”
Standing in only a linen nightgown, she looked up at him. “I’m giving myself to you.” She pushed the straps of her nightgown off her shoulders, and down it went.
“Wren...” He made no move to touch her.
She took the kitten, gently placing him in a laundry basket with towels that needed to be folded. “Now, it’s your turn to tell me to stop.” She cautiously removed his coat. When she reached for his belt, he caught her wrist in an unbreakable grip.
“No.”
She hadn’t expected him to actually stop her.
“I mean, leave it.” He pulled her hand to his chest. “That can wait.”
“I’ve waited—“
“Trust me.”
She nodded, backing off, and his grip loosened.
She ran her palms over his chest, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, pressing her naked body into him.
Slowly, she rose on her toes and brushed her lips to the corner of his mouth, breathing in his familiar scent of cedar and winter air.
“You can’t scare me away, Greyson. I’ve seen you at your worst. And I know, at the core, you’re a good man. ”
“You haven’t seen all of me.”
“Then show me.”
He backed her into the wall, cupping his hand around her throat where her pulse beat wildly. His hand slid high enough to show her he wasn’t messing around. “You’re already shaking.”
“You’re holding my throat.”
“Are you scared?”
“No.”
“You should be.”
“Then you’re going to have to do better than that.” She relaxed into the wall, letting all the resistance melt out of her muscles.
His mouth slammed against hers, hard and punishing. His tongue swept into her mouth with dark promise, commanding control, as she surrendered to his lead. When he grabbed her breast, he wasn’t gentle. He tried to shock her, but he couldn’t.
His clothed body pushed against her naked one, grinding into her, showing her how much she affected him.
He dragged her hand to the bulge in his pants. “This is what you do to me.”
He bit her lip, as if to punish her. She gasped and covered her mouth. “Ouch.”
His hand tightened in her hair as he kissed away the pain. “This is my mouth, Wren. Do you understand? No more Soren, or anyone else. No one kisses you but me.”
“Okay.”
“Promise me.”
“I promise.”
“Good.” He released her and shivers chased over her skin.
“Why did you stop?”
“I’ve dealt with you. Now, I have to deal with my brother.”
“Grey—”
“Don’t. This is between me and Soren.” He picked her robe up off the floor and handed it to her, then adjusted the bulge in his pants. “Come to my place tonight.”
“When?”
“Seven. We’ll finish this then.” He scooped Tinsel out of the basket.
When he grabbed his coat, she quickly slipped back into her robe and followed him to the front door. “Grey, you can’t fight with Soren over this. You’ve won.”
“That doesn’t erase what he did.”
She caught his arm. “Greyson, please! Don’t turn this into a scandal.”
“It’s only a scandal if no one backs off. He’ll back off. You’ll see.”