Chapter 4
Chapter Four
Four weeks later, Matilda had almost forgotten about the DNA test when Stella asked her to meet up for dinner. Their brothers were coming too, which was the closest thing to a miracle she’d experienced in years. They were both married and always busy with their own families, and they rarely had time for their sisters. If she was being honest, they’d barely spent any time with their parents before they passed either. But she was trying to be more generous of spirit lately. It made her less anxious. She’d been listening to a podcast that outlined strategies for reducing anxiety over the previous few weeks—one such strategy was to give up expectations around the behaviour of others. It’d been helping, even if she found it hard to do at times.
Grief had done some strange things to her in both her mind and body. She’d expected to feel sad, but there was more to it. An emptiness, lack of purpose or direction she hadn’t felt before, along with an array of physical symptoms—the worst being her anxiety. It was as though she was existing solely on the shots of adrenaline coursing through her veins somedays. And she was so very tired of it.
It didn’t help that work had been manic lately.
“Dr. Berry?” The veterinarian assistant cocked her head to one side. “Did you hear me?”
Matilda focused, glancing up from the paperwork in front of her to give her full attention. “Sorry, Sue. What did you say?”
“Do you want me to keep the chocolate eating labradoodle overnight for observation, or can she go home?”
Matilda smiled. “She can go. I’ll come and speak to the owner in a moment.”
With a nod, Sue pushed back through the doorway to the reception area and was gone. Matilda continued smiling as she finished filling out the timesheet for the previous patient, a cockatoo with a malting problem, and thought about the labradoodle. She was a beautiful little thing, reddish brown with floppy ears and a mop of curly wool. She’d torn apart a box of chocolates meant as a gift, consuming the lot in twenty minutes while her owner was at the shops. But some charcoal and fluids had done the trick, and she was ready to go home and get some rest. Many dogs fretted if they stayed too long, so she preferred to let them recuperate in a familiar environment if possible.
After she’d dealt with the labradoodle, she returned to her office with a sigh. She was done for the day, and her entire body ached with relief. She’d spent most of the past ten hours on her feet. There’d been two emergency surgeries, plus the chocolate-filled and very hyper dog. Along with five different creatures to euthanise. And a litter of puppies to vaccinate. Along with the usual walk-ins. It’d been a busy day. Something that’d been happening a lot more in recent months, since their veterinary clinic was growing in popularity.
She’d wanted this for a long time but now the achievement felt empty. She didn’t even know who she was.
The thought came out of nowhere. Why had those words run through her mind? She’d put the whole DNA test behind her. Forgotten about it. It was a mistake, nothing more. Auntie Flora had said so—she was there when Matilda was born. A living witness to the event. There was no other explanation other than administrative error. And she’d gone on with her life for four whole weeks, pushing the mistake out of her mind. But now it was back, out of nowhere.
Her phone rang. It was Cam, her boyfriend of two years. She hadn’t seen him all week. He’d been less attentive lately. She wondered if there was something wrong.
She answered with what she hoped sounded like enthusiasm. “Hey, Cam.”
“Hi, honey. Sorry I haven’t called lately. It’s been busy at work, and I’m training for that half marathon…”
She interrupted him. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it. How are you?”
“I’m good. My calf muscles are really tight … anyway, that’s not important. I thought we could get some dinner?”
“I’m sorry, I’ve already committed to dinner with my brothers and Stella, which is a pretty rare occurrence. So I don’t think I can blow them off this late in the day.”
“No, of course you can’t. We can have drinks afterwards. Does that work for you?”
“Sounds good. I’m hopeless at staying up late, but I’ll make it work, since I’m dying to see you.” She hadn’t missed him as much as she should’ve, but the past couple of months had taken a toll on her. Maybe her emotions were used up and she didn’t have enough left over for him.
“Let’s drink shots!” Bryce said, eyes gleaming with mischief as he raised a hand to signal the waiter.
The restaurant he’d chosen was loud and packed full of diners. It was a far trendier nightspot than Matilda had visited in years. These days, she preferred to sit on her couch with a cat on either side, eating takeaway, than to go to a nightclub or a popular bar in the city. But Bryce had booked it for them to eat dinner together, and so far, she was enjoying herself. Until he’d said the word “shots”, anyway.
“Shots? I don’t know…” Matilda began.
Stella laughed. “Really, Bryce? We’re not teenagers anymore.”
“I never drank shots when I was a teen…” Todd said with a flare of his nostrils.
Did Todd ever let his hair down? Matilda couldn’t remember the last time he’d relaxed. He was a busy doctor, popular in his field. He had to be responsible, she understood that. But they were family, and he’d caught an Uber to the restaurant, there was no reason for him to be a stick in the mud. Pulling her hairband out of her hair in a symbolic gesture, she shook it free, letting the golden waves fall about her shoulders.
“Okay, Bryce, let’s do shots.”
It didn’t take much convincing to get Stella and Todd on board. And while they waited for the modern Asian fusion food to arrive, they drank shots of Tequila until Matilda’s head began to feel light and her words slurred.
Todd’s voice immediately grew louder as he shouted over the noise of the crowd. “If my hands are injured tonight, I hold you all personally responsible.”
Matilda rolled her eyes. “No one is going to injure your precious hands, sweetie. Relax. I love it when you let go of that stick…” she bit down on her tongue.
“What stick?” Bryce asked, eyes narrowing.
Stella burst out laughing then clamped a hand over her mouth. Eyes wide, she said. “I—ve definitely shoulda n—ot had that last one.”
Bryce giggled silently beside her, his whole body shaking. “You guys, I love you. You’re the best.”
“I love you too,” Matilda replied. “All of you. I’m so grateful for you. But I miss you. We don’t do this often enough.”
“Now that Mum and Dad are gone, we’ve got to make the effort,” Bryce said.
“Definitely,” Stella agreed, nodding emphatically.
Their food arrived and they made space for it on the table, moving the empty shot glasses out of the way. Bryce ordered a bottle of red wine for them to share, and Matilda poured it for them. Then, she spooned food from each of the shared plates onto her own. It was hot, spicy, and looked delicious. Thinly sliced beef, fat, juicy prawns, fried balls of breaded chicken and pork, all made with vegetables, onions and peppers into meals that mixed Australian and Asian cultures together.
She took a bite of the beef and savoured the tangy flavour. “Mmmm … this is good.”
“You’re right, Bryce,” Todd said, picking up the threads of their conversation. “Now that our parents are no longer here, we won’t be meeting up at their house for the holidays. We can’t just bump into each other over a family lunch. We’re going to have to be the ones who stay in touch.” His brow was furrowed. “I guess I hadn’t thought much about it.”
“It’s been easy to let our connection slip a bit over the years,” Stella said. “But I’ll try to call more often.”
They all agreed to do the same.
“We’re all we have,” Matilda said, thoughtfully. Although, the idea brought tears to her eyes.
“You’ve got Cam too,” Stella replied, lovingly patting her arm.
Matilda sniffled into a napkin. “I know, but it’s not the same. I’m not even sure things will work out there.”
“What? Why not?” Stella asked, alarm written on her face. “You two have been together for ages.”
“He’s not right for you,” Todd added, before taking a big bite of pork.
Matilda glared at him. “What do you mean by that?”
“You know what I mean. He’s a bit … I don’t know. Self-absorbed.”
She wanted to point out the irony of Todd making such a statement. But the steam quickly abated when she realised he was right. She couldn’t refute his argument. And even though Todd could be annoying, he was most often right, which was actually one of his more annoying traits.
“You can definitely do better,” Bryce added with a nod. A brown curl fell over his eyes, and he blew it back with a huff of air.
“Which leaves me exactly where I said … alone, apart from you guys. You’re all I have. And what if…?” She choked back a sob. When she drank, she always got emotional and talkative. She couldn’t help it. All the things she’d been burying came rushing to the surface, with nothing holding them back any longer.
“What’s wrong, honey?” Stella asked, with concern etched on her pretty face.
“What if I’m not actually your sister?”
“What are you talking about?” Todd asked as he paused eating, fork halfway to his mouth.
Bryce frowned at her. “Tilly, what’s going on?”
Matilda exchanged a look with Stella, who offered her a wan smile. She drew a deep breath, willing her spinning mind to focus. “I didn’t tell you two about it, but when my DNA results came back from that test we took, it showed that I wasn’t related to any of you.”
Bryce screwed up his nose. “No, that’s silly. It can’t be right.”
“I’m sure there’s a reasonable explanation. Don’t go getting upset about,” Todd added with a nod.
“We went to see Auntie Flora,” Stella said. “And she told us she saw Tilly born. So, I agree—it’s got to be a mistake. You shouldn’t worry about it, Tilly.”
“Why aren’t any of you telling me to call the company? Complain? Get to the bottom of it?” Matilda asked, feeling a lump grow in her throat.
Stella sighed and looked at Todd, who promptly flicked his gaze towards his brother. There was silence.
“It’s nothing, really,” Stella said suddenly with a bright smile. “Only … I don’t really want to know. That’s all.”
“Me either,” Bryce added, reaching over to squeeze Matilda’s hand. “It doesn’t matter either way. Don’t dig into it. We’re fine. We’re a team. I’m certain it’s an error, but if it’s not… — well, I don’t think it’ll benefit us to find out.”
“You’ve got to know.” Todd said, with consternation. “You can’t just hide from the truth.”
Matilda looked back and forth between them. Her siblings all had their eyes fixed on her face with worried expressions. She loved her family so much. “Todd’s right, I want to know the truth. I wasn’t going to pursue it. I tried to get on with my life. But I’ve got to find out if there’s something real behind these results.”
“Oh honey…” Stella said.
“It’s going to be okay,” Todd added. “No matter what, it doesn’t change anything.”
“We’re your family,” Bryce said.
She nodded, the lump in her throat almost choking her now. “I know. But thanks for saying it.”