Chapter 28 Shade
SHADE
I’m sitting on our new sofa, the one that was delivered earlier today, when I hear both a bike and a car engine. And those two sounds reassure me that the gut decision I made to insist Kai buy us an extra-large and extra-wide sofa was the right one.
Because this thing is big enough to fit all three of us in just about any combination of positions.
And lord knows I want to hold Isla and Kai.
I worked like a dog in my physio session because I want to be back to fighting fitness so that I can look out for Isla, and so that Wild doesn’t have to do it all by himself.
And, while I’ve used the time wisely to pull together the plans to upskill everyone with a view to starting on it as early as next week, it’s not the same as putting rubber to the road and conducting club business.
I also want to get fit again because I have other plans. Plans that interrupted me periodically throughout the day. Possibilities of sexual acts the three of us can try. Ninety percent of them aren’t currently possible with this busted body.
The door opens and slams, and I hear the shuffle of feet in the entrance hall as they remove jackets and coats. It’s followed by the heavy thud of Kai’s boots.
“Hey, honey, we’re home,” Kai shouts.
“I’m in the front room.”
I have my back against the arm of the sofa, a couple of pillows behind me, but I put my arm over the back and twist to see their faces when they walk in.
“Oh my gosh, what a great sofa,” Isla says. And it makes me wonder if we should include her in future furnishing decisions. Maybe I’ll leave it to the two of them to decide how our house looks together. I don’t really care what it looks like, as long as we’re all in it.
Wild knows my three rules: Big. Comfortable. Practical. I don’t want one of those show homes where you’re scared of leaving a footprint or sitting on a cushion.
I point to the windowpane that got replaced this afternoon. “And we have a view again instead of a sheet of plywood.”
“Looks good,” Kai says, stepping in behind her. “The window, the couch, and you.”
Isla kisses me softly. “How are you feeling?”
I raise an eyebrow. “How am I feeling? Noah’s lucky he’s still breathing, today. How are you?”
Kai playfully musses her hair. “I don’t think you need to worry about Isla. She just stood her ground against Karlie.”
I glance back at Isla. “Karlie upset you?”
She comes and flops down on the sofa by my knees. “I think she’s jealous. But she was just so…mean.”
“I told her to keep our names out of her mouth and banned her from the clubhouse for a month,” Kai says.
“Good. If you hadn’t, I would.”
Isla smiles softly. “You don’t even know what she did.”
“Don’t need to. I’m on your side.”
Isla’s forehead gets lines. “But I could be in the wrong, for all you know.”
I shrug. “Really doesn’t matter. If you’re wrong, we talk about it behind closed doors, but out there”—I point toward the window—“we’re on one side.”
“That,” she says, putting her hands either side of my shoulders on the chair arm, “is very sweet.”
When her lips reach mine again, I slip my good arm around her and grip the back of her neck, holding her here.
All day, I’ve been having more spontaneous erections than I think I had when I was a horny teenager. My thoughts kept circling two things: The way it felt to share her with Kai. The way it felt to share my Wild with Isla.
When Kai told me he caught Noah one step from sexually assaulting her, I felt like my whole world was about to implode.
The idea that she could be taken from us any minute has been like the persistent chirp of the deathwatch beetle, all fucking day.
But now she’s home and safe and…
Home.
“Someone’s feeling better,” Wild mutters. He closes the curtains, given it’s going dark, and drops down onto the other end of the sofa with a grunt. Then, he stretches his legs out like he owns the place.
Which, to be fair, he does.
And so do I.
And, philosophically, so does Isla, because she belongs here with us. I flash ahead to a future where maybe she lives here, and we keep her house across the street so Kai’s huge family can stay there when they come visit.
“That massage stretched me out good,” I say, my eyes never leaving hers.
I feel her smile against my lips, and that action alone does something steadying to my chest. It seems Isla has that effect on me. Somehow, she reaches into the noisy parts of me and turns the dial down in a way only Kai has ever been able to do.
But while Kai does it by anchoring me, by standing unshakably by my side, Isla does it with a softness and quiet assurance that makes the world feel less sharp.
She pulls back just enough so that she can see me. There’s a tenderness in her eyes as she fixes my hair, and I know deep in my gut that she sees who I am and accepts me anyway.
There’s only one other person on this planet who has shown me that kind of unconditional love, and I shift my eyes to his, for a second. He’s lying with his head back on the sofa, eyes closed, but I see his chest lift and fall in a contented sigh.
“I missed you today,” Isla says.
“You were only gone for eight hours.” I don’t know why I still feel the need to deflect rather than accept the compliment, that she thinks of me during the day in a way that leaves her keen to get home. So, I rethink my answer. “I missed you too.”
She leans in again, slower this time, and I let myself sink into her. My body registers familiar things. Her warmth and the way she smells faintly like some fruity soap. How we fit, even though there’s a tension in her arms to make sure she doesn’t hurt me more.
“I should go get changed out of these scrubs,” Isla says, pulling back, her fingers lingering as they drag across my collarbone. “I smell like dogs.”
“You do not,” I say.
“You’re being kind. But I’m going to get changed.”
Kai opens one eye. “Come back wearing nothing but one of Garrett’s T-shirts.”
The cutest stain of pink touches her cheeks. “Five minutes,” she says.
“If you’re wearing just my T-shirt, you’d better bring the condoms with you,” I add.
Kai grins. “And the lube from my bedside table if you want us to use it.”
I guess being around Isla is bringing out a different side to him. In some ways, I thought he would be the same with Isla that he is with me, but their dynamic is going to be different to ours.
What he has with me has been forged over years of knowing exactly how hard to hold on to me. With Isla, there’s more room for being softer, for stepping forward as opposed to being pulled in. Different dynamics with love at the center, and it settles something in me that I can’t give a name to.
Yet, strangely, I’m not jealous, because I treat Isla differently to Kai. With Kai, I know he can withstand all that I am and not worry about breaking anything. With Isla, I slow down more and want to uncover her softness…or maybe give her a safe place to let it grow.
She heads down the hall, and I watch the sway of her hips as she goes. I don’t look away when Kai sees me staring. He simply raises an eyebrow and chuckles.
“Is she okay?” I ask.
He nods, scrubbing a hand over his stubble. “Shaken. Pissed, maybe. Don’t think the Karlie thing helped. She saw the two of us making out. I think it’s time for us to tell the club, because Karlie’s got a fucking mouth on her, and even though I threatened her, I think she might spill.”
There’s a quiet stretch where I think about what Kai suggested. I shift a little on the sofa, testing my ribs, my shoulder. Everything still aches, but I think I could manage a truck ride.
Then, I think about the thing I’m avoiding. “My experience of coming out has never been like yours. I’m happy with who I am and accept it fully, but, fuck, the horror of telling the world and the world not…”
I let the words run off.
He reaches for my calf and squeezes it. “I’m ready to let the club surprise us with their response. I’ll stand by your side, unwavering in my acceptance of who you are. They don’t like it, we roll.”
I look around at the living room in the house we just bought, but I’m already falling in love with. “What if I don’t want to leave here?”
“Then, we retire our cuts, invest in some laser work for our club ink, and live a fucking good life. We get jobs. Mechanics. Or we start our own shop just over the border of the town limits so we don’t piss Grudge off.”
While laser is preferable to the way Paltrow lost his ink with a blowtorch, it still doesn’t sound like my idea of fun and I wouldn’t want Kai to have to go through that. “You’d quit. For this place?”
Kai shakes his head. “No. I’d quit for you.”
“Come here,” I instruct.
Kai huffs playfully as he moves closer to let me kiss him. Both of us sigh, breath against each other’s lips.
“We’ll go to the clubhouse and we’ll tell them,” I say. “But can we wait a few more days? I need to get my head straight about it, and I want to feel physically stronger when I do it.”
Kai nods. “Whatever you need. I’m excited.”
“I’m scared shitless.”
He touches my face. “Whatever happens, we’ll still be together at the end of the day. And that’s enough for me.”
Together.
It’s one of the only words that can ease my racing pulse.
“So, we tell them all of it,” I say. “You and me. Isla. Why you suspended Karlie for a month.”
Kai shrugs. “Might take some heat for that, given Isla isn’t officially our old lady.”
“Yet,” I add.
“You’re really happy?” Kai asks.
The footsteps on the stairs tell me I don’t have long to answer. I can only fall for Isla now because Kai patiently showed me how to fall for him, but that would take too long to explain. “More than I knew I could be.”
Then, I slide my hand over Kai’s cock, tucked hard and tight in his denim, and he breathes deeply as I squeeze firmly. “Love the feel of your dick in my hand.”
“Let me take your jeans and underwear off so you can have some privacy when it hurts,” Kai says.
“I don’t mind her seeing. I mean, if we do this, those things should be shared equally, not kept from her, right?”
Isla takes that moment to reappear. She’s barefoot and glowing in that way that makes something sharp and protective flourish in my gut.
The fact she’s wearing her hair up in a cute, messy bun, is draped in my T-shirt that dwarfs her, and doesn’t hesitate to join us when Kai reaches out his hand for her doesn’t help.
For some reason, I find her fascinating.
Slim fingers with short, polished nails.
Long eyelashes. The feel of her hips in my hands, so much less sturdy than mine and Kai’s frames.
Then, I look at Kai and realize that I’m still fascinated by him.
The way that dark, thick hair slips through my fingers, his slightly pointed canines that make him look so youthful when he smiles.
She frames Kai’s face with her hands and kisses him.
From this angle, I can see the way their tongues meet, the way his hands slide up her back and hold her tight.
I wonder if I could ever convince the two of them to let me take some photographs.
God knows I’ve got enough photos of Kai’s cock on my phone already, but I wonder whether that openness stretches to letting me photograph it in use.
My cock aches at the thought of the very best kind of porn…between two people who love each other as much as I love them.
It’d be so fucking hot.
I loosen the belt on my jeans and open the button and zipper to give my cock some room. Sliding my hand beneath my underwear, I reach for it and stroke it firmly.
“Can I?” Kai asks as he slides his hand between Isla’s thighs but hovers by the hem of the T-shirt.
Isla nods. “Please.”
Kai smiles at whatever he finds there. Wetness, I assume. A sign she’s into this as much as we are. Isla places her hands on his shoulders, and her head dips forward. Her face is pretty on the worst days, but watching her like this? When she’s open and safe and aroused?
When she stops worrying about who she is and her place in the world?
She’s beautiful.
And her joy reassures me that what is happening right here and now is enough to keep her anchored with us.