Chapter 19 Azahara
Azahara
Azahara’s eyes gradually fluttered open, revealing the world around her in a slow unfurling. The familiar gray walls of the cave surrounded her, where she had spent who knew how long in.
The only sound that echoed was the distant rumble of thunder, indicating that the rain had ceased and she was alone in the cave. The scent of damp earth and grass permeated her senses as her body gradually reawakened.
Physically, she was healed, with everything in its proper place, but mentally, she felt broken and battered. The dimly lit room still seemed too bright, and a part of her yearned to retreat back into the comforting darkness of death.
Feeling adrift like a leaf in the wind, she rose to her feet. Her body moved without conscious direction, as if guided by an invisible force. Like a compass, she felt a pull to move forward and let her subconscious lead the way.
“Starlight...” Her voice sounded unfamiliar, as though it hadn’t been used in hours, or perhaps even days.
Yet, it wasn’t just the passage of time that caused this.
The tone seemed incongruent with her usual self.
“Come,” she whispered, calling to her steed.
They were acres apart, and it was strange how he would know where she was and how he would hear her.
While she lacked the answers, she simply knew that he would.
As she exited the opening of the darkened cave, it was likely early morning. The sun had begun to rise in the east, but the thick layer of storm clouds made it feel like night. She wondered then just how long she had been gone.
Another crackling of thunder was accompanied by the pounding of hooves on the muddied ground. There was a dual set, and while she knew Starlight would come, she had least expected to see Moondancer.
They both slowed their pace, their heads bobbing up and down, displaying emotions that she longed to reciprocate. Her lips formed a faint frown, even though she felt overjoyed to see them. However, witnessing Starlight still marked with her blood caused a pang of pain in her heart.
Her arms came up and wrapped around both of their snouts while they leaned against her shoulders. She had always been able to feel Starlight’s emotions, but she’d never felt them this strongly before. As if the dam that had restrained it had finally burst.
Azahara could’ve just stayed there, holding them both like that for hours, but she knew she had to reach Kaed and Illyan. And it was like Starlight sensed it too, without her having to say a word. He shifted his body, lowering himself for her to mount.
With a handful of his mane, she hauled herself up and over, giving a little nudge to his side.
Then, they were off, the chilly wind rustling through her hair as she leaned into her trusty companion.
She couldn’t help but murmur, “Thank you.” And in response, Starlight let out a gleeful cry, almost like he understood her perfectly.
In no time at all, they raced back to the house, effortlessly traversing the meadow and weaving through the trees with no obstacles in their path.
The door stood wide open, casting a warm, inviting glow into the surrounding area.
Along the stone walkway leading to the entrance, the once-beautiful flowers lay in ruins, crushed and torn.
And then, right before them, in the illuminated doorway, stood Illyan and Kaed, both alive.
Starlight gracefully lowered himself, allowing Azahara to dismount.
They both sprinted towards her, and she let out a breathless whimper, her emotions surging like a tidal wave.
Blood, resembling dried mud, stained her mouth and neck, cracking as she finally broke into a heartwarming smile.
Her mouth opened to speak, but she found no words.
As they closed the distance between them, Azahara observed Illyan slowing down, allowing Kaed to crash into her with an unstoppable force. It was a collision that conveyed an unbreakable bond, one that whispered to her that not even the gods themselves could separate them.
She melted into him immediately. His strong arms wrapped around her, fingers threading through her hair and cradling her head against his chest. It was only when she felt him trembling beneath her touch that she realized she had wrapped her arms around him as well.
He lifted her off the ground, burying his face in her neck, his body enveloping hers, leaving no room for anyone else.
After what felt like all-too-brief a moment, he gently set her down and brought her into his view. His hand brushed her hair aside, revealing the tears streaking down his face.
A deep ache settled in her bones as she realized the extent of their pain, with the events that had transpired now coming into sharper focus.
Seeing tears in both of their eyes made her choke back her own. Kaed, unashamed, blinked and let himself cry. “Don’t you ever do that again! Do you hear me?” His voice cracked, his teeth clenched as he pressed his forehead to hers.
She wanted to promise him at that moment she wouldn’t, but she knew that would be a lie. Because despite the pain they all felt, it was because of what she had done, they were alive, and the three of them were together.
“Kaed—” His kiss silenced her, their lips meshing together, their bodies fitting perfectly. Her arms left his side and encircled his torso once more. A sob escaped him, perhaps as he finally grasped the reality that she was indeed there with him.
He didn’t press her to promise anything, and likely it was because he knew deep down that she couldn’t.
After pressing another kiss to her lips, and forehead, Kaed reluctantly stepped aside.
He was moving for Illyan, who was patiently waiting with tearful eyes. “Oh, Illy…” A deep breath was all the time she had before they were holding her. Her head against their chest, while their lithe form held her tightly.
Illyan sobbed harder than she had ever seen before. Dread, sorrow, it all drowned them. “I’m so sorry, Ladybug.” Barely able to speak words, they hyperventilated through them, and it broke her heart. “You were so brave, and I was not. A weak excuse for a—”
“Stop, Illy.” She pulled away from them. “Your strength was doing what was hard. For that, I thank you.” They tried to gather themselves but to little avail. She took their hand and placed it over her heart. “I’m here.”
She looked at Kaed, her hand reaching for his. “I’m here.” He took it without hesitation. Illyan leaned down and pressed his forehead to hers. Their tears spilled down her cheeks. “I love you, Ladybug.”
She smiled up at them. “I love you, Illy.”
Illyan stepped away, brushing away the tears from their face. Without saying a word, they made their way back toward the horses, who had remained still since her return.
Kaed pulled her back to him, his voice filled with sincerity. “I was only going to let you go for them.” His arm encircled her shoulder, drawing her close against him. As he took a deep breath, his chest rose beneath her, and the rapid heartbeat reverberated in her ear.
“I know you must have so many questions,” she said, gazing up at him, his eyes filled with intensity as they locked onto hers.
His hand reached up to caress her cheek, his thumb lightly brushing against her skin. “Is this your blood?” he asked, his nail gently scraping over it.
“No,” she replied softly.
“Good. I don’t have any more questions for now.” He leaned down and planted another tender kiss on her lips, his hand slowly sliding around her neck. “You are home,” he whispered, his words a mere breath against her lips.
He slid his arm under her legs and effortlessly lifted her off the ground. She melted into his embrace, resting her head against his shoulder.
Noticing that he hadn’t cleaned himself up, she asked, “How long was I gone?” As he closed the door behind them.
“Close to half a day,” he replied, his gaze locked with hers. “And not that I wasn’t already worried, but after a few hours, it was only getting worse—for both of us.”
“I’m so—”
“Are you really going to apologize?” He gently lowered her to the floor, his eyes filled with hurt. “I should be the one apologizing...” His voice quivered with emotion, the pain in his words palpable.
Her head dropped as she stood. She shouldn’t apologize, but neither should he. The attack by the Vaeragi was unwarranted, but what violence in this world was, especially to the degree that it had happened.
Kaed wrapped his arms around her hips, which caused her to gasp in surprise. His face pressed against her stomach, and he took a deep breath. He had got to his knees so quietly that she hadn’t even noticed.
Her fingers brushed through his uncombed hair. He didn’t say anything, just held her to him.
“Kaed—”
After taking several deep breaths, he raised his head to meet her gaze. “I’ve never been more terrified in my life,” he confessed, his eyes filled with vulnerability. “Never felt more hopeless.” She pressed her lips together, feeling bumps line her arms as a chill ran down her spine.
“Watching you fight so hard, alone, it was... I’ve never felt such rage.” His grip on her remained unrelenting, but she didn’t mind. Her hand moved to cup his cheek, and he embraced her touch.
“I wasn’t alone.” Her voice was soft. “Nor did I die alone.” Kaed tensed under her, and she gently placed her other hand on the opposite cheek.
“If they had taken you from me. If your heart had stopped instead of mine. Nothing in this world would have mattered.” Her jaw clenched.
“I knew you wouldn’t come back, and I would not have survived that. ”
“I am supposed to protect you.”
“Why?” She was gentle and understanding.
“Because I should protect what is mine.”
Azahara felt her lips part, not in protest, but in quiet realization. “Yours?” she whispered.