Chapter 45 Azahara
Azahara
Throughout the next several weeks, Karver was at her side whenever no one else was. He had become her shadow, and while she was most irritable about it, both Illyan and Kaed were happy about the arrangement.
Honestly, she couldn’t tell who was more elated by the situation.
Kaed had personally shaken Karver’s hand and pressed him to thank Commander Latimer for thinking of her protection.
The urge to remind Kaed that the same Commander had tried to kiss her in the Idle Fox reared its ugly head.
She stifled it, knowing that it made Kaed feel safer that someone was always watching over her who wasn’t interested in tasting what was between her thighs.
Illyan, on the other hand, well, they were happy to have something sweet to drool over.
Kaed was also exuberant that Illyan had eyes for another now.
Azahara had been far from thrilled, experiencing a sensation akin to a child being excessively nurtured and monitored.
The absence of Zhal was keenly felt, as Azahara longed for her presence.
While she had a protective nature over Azahara, it had never meant she was restricted from pursuing her endeavors.
Now it was all about “Where are you going?” “Don’t stray too far from camp” “Don’t do this” and “Be careful of this.”
It was exhausting, to say the least.
She truly enjoyed Karver and his company just as much as she hated it.
He had shared that her company wasn’t so bad when she wasn’t trying to run away from him.
They shared details of their lives, Azahara less than him, but he never pried.
That stood out to her, and she wondered if it had been a command of Jayce.
She had also wondered if it had been strategic to send a male not interested in women to protect her. That thought irritated her more for some reason.
Nevertheless, as time progressed, she and Karver got closer. After week three, he had shared with her that he had been commanded to send updates to the king through Jayce, but slipped a few minor details, like the fact that she had healed the broken nose caused by the General nearly overnight.
Again, he didn’t press to know why.
Azahara was happy about that, more than he could have known.
Jayce never made an appearance, even with several notes. Two of them which she physically wrote:
He hadn’t responded back through a note or through Karver. The only time that she had ever received a response was after her most recent letter:
When Karver handed her the piece of paper addressed to her, she looked at him in surprise, only to find a devilish smile spreading across his face. “I have never seen someone rile up the Commander like you do.”
She opened it quickly to read:
With a groan, she folded the letter and put it into her pants pocket. That had been the last communication she had gotten to and from Jayce. The following day, there had been word of movement coming from Helgum.
It had been ill-timed, as Illyan had left back to Howl just days before to reconcile with his grandfather and try to convince him of Jaakobai’s true intentions.
They still seemed reluctant to think their father would be the mastermind behind all this, and she understood.
Never had she heard of a Fae killing another unless it was out of self-defense. It was unheard of.
Yet, she knew the truth. Jaakobai was part of this, and something told her that Thall was just a pawn in some game he was playing. What the game was, she was unsure, and it made her sick to think of what he might be up to.
That night, a mixture of anticipation and excitement filled the camp. They had waited over three weeks for this, yet some felt it was too quick. The ones who were excited decided to bring out the ale early, and a band that sounded oddly familiar began to play in the middlemost point of the Outpost.
Azahara stood against a stack of unopened boxes, one of her legs crossed over the other.
Karver was beside her, fidgeting with his cloak, an unamused expression on his face.
They had shown no interest in celebrating before the battle, but when she couldn’t sleep, the next best thing was watching them be fools.
They had already transported all those incapable of fighting up to the kingdom and beyond the gates, which included Zhal.
Despite her strong desire to resist their decision to take Zhal away, exposing her to additional danger made no sense if the fighting were to reach the camp.
Kaed found them then as her mind wandered to where exactly Zhal was at that moment. His arm snaked around her waist and he pressed a kiss to her lips. “Good evening, Red.” Then he looked to Karver. “Officer Cross.”
Karver nodded toward him. “Evening, Ranger Blackfyre.”
Her eyes went between the two of them. It was strange, their formality. Hadn’t they just been on a first-name basis a few days ago? She shrugged off the creepy-crawly feeling running up her spine.
“Evening.” Her arm rested on his back as she leaned against his shoulder.
“Done with the prep work?” A few hours before sunset, he had departed to meet with the Eagles, assuring her they would reunite later.
However, she had not anticipated that it would be hours later until she laid eyes on him once more.
“Yeah, looks like we are going to move south just before the sun begins to rise. Early reports say they are crossing the border between Shubae and Meadows Crossing on foot. We will intercept them before they make it a few hundred yards past Sunfall.” He placed a kiss on her forehead, pulling her close to him.
She looked over at Karver, noticing him staring down at her, and turning his attention quickly to Kaed. “Azahara and I will fall within the middle, not with the Order’s soldiers, but with the backline.”
Kaed nodded, and she furrowed her eyebrows. “I won’t be with you?” She didn’t like that thought in the slightest.
“I’ll be covering the front line with the other rangers from the backline.” He smiled down at her. Suppose that did make it better. He would be furthest from the actual fighting.
She looked back at Karver, who was not looking at her this time, but instead at the crowd of soldiers now drinking and dancing to a rhythmic folk-like sound.
“Just promise me, Red, at the first sign of trouble, you leave. Come find me. Officer Cross will know where I’ll be.”
“We will.” Karver answered for her. “On my honor, nothing will happen to her.”
She shifted her head down, her eyes digging holes into the dirt below. It was then that fear began to sink in. Her throat closed, her heart ready to explode from her chest, making her head swim.
“Let’s head to bed,” Kaed said, seemingly missing her body’s cues. “We should get some sleep.”
“I’ll be there shortly. Karver, are you okay taking a walk with me somewhere quiet?”
Karver stood straight. “Yes, of course.”
Kaed pulled his brows together. “I can come with you.”
She smiled and placed both of her hands on his chest. “No, it’s okay. I don’t need to talk to Karver... I want to walk, is all. You get to bed, and I’ll join you before you even fade to sleep.”
That act seemed to suppress any reservations he had about imposing himself on her, and he bid her farewell with a kiss before walking away.
With Karver in tow, they moved away from the noise of the camp, weaving in and out of the tents that were either quiet, or filled with the sounds of familiar pleasures.
She should be taking advantage of this opportunity to spend the last night with Kaed before they went into battle, but she only wanted to sit under a tree and hear nothing.
Which is exactly where she found herself.
On the outskirts of the Outpost, beyond the forged steel walls, were beautiful willow trees with yellow catkins hanging from them.
They smelled of spruce, and the wet grass around her filled her senses.
The sky was clear of clouds, allowing the crescent moon to shine down on her, casting a light shadow across the plain.
Karver stood a few feet away, allowing space for Azahara to breathe without hovering. She appreciated him more than ever at that moment.
The blinding fear, which had begun to consume her, crept upward from her toes, starting as a mere tingle and transforming into a monstrous force poised to engulf her at any instant.
She curled her knees to her chest, enveloping her legs with her arms. How could she have displayed such bravery mere weeks before, only to transform into a timid mouse today?
“May I provide words of comfort?” Karver spoke, his deep, strong voice gentle in its attempt to sound soothing.
“Sure.” Her voice was all too soft.
He approached. “A battle is like dancing with a stranger.” He kneeled down in front of her.
“That stranger could be really good at dancing, or really bad at it. Either way, you’ve made the commitment, and putting your all into it can cause the dance to be better and end quicker, or you can let the fear of embarrassment sink in and take hold of you. ”
She looked at him with condemnation. “That was terrible, Karver.”
A sheepish expression crossed his face. “I suppose it is. I’m a bit rusty at my cryptic poems.”
It made her laugh slightly, a smile crossing her lips.
“I just mean to say, we are in it now. There isn’t anything we can do about it. Either commit and fight like hell, or give up before it begins.”
The look of determination on his face was comforting, and she felt her heart rate beginning to slow.
“Thank you, Karver, truly.” A nervous laugh escaped him, and she looked at him warily. “What?”
“Don’t thank me too soon.” He stepped back, and for the briefest moment, she wondered what he was up to.
“You are pretty bad at that, you know, metaphors, Officer Cross.” She was on her feet quicker than her mind processed the voice that came from behind the tree she had been sitting against.
“I get it from you, Commander Latimer.”
Opening her mouth, she bore her eyes into Karver, and he visibly retreated. His eyes widened, and he put his hands up. “I didn’t do anything, I swear.”
“Don’t hurt him; I just came to get my boots dirty before heading back up to check on the sleepy king.” Turning back toward the shadows, she leaned her head around to try and find him.
“No, I’m not meant to be here, remember?” he commented, staying hidden, ensuring she wouldn’t see him.
Rolling her eyes, she took a deep breath and sighed. “Then why are you here?”
“Just checking in on Officer Cross, making sure you haven’t turned him against me.”
Karver laughed behind her. “She’s a charmer. I’m quite fond.” He stepped back and turned from them. “I’m going to use the privy. I’ll be back soon to take you to your quarters, Azahara.”
Suppressing the impulse to plead for him to take her along, she directed a piercing glare into the darkness. The only indication of another presence was a faint, elusive shadow stretching across the ground.
“Seriously, Commander Latimer—”
“Oh, so formal now?” He cut her off, and a soft chuckle rumbled from his throat. The sound made her heart thrum against her chest.
“What is it?” He had a peculiar ability to provoke her anger for reasons unknown to her.
“A few things, but first, I want to apologize for that night at the Idle Fox.”
Feeling her body begin to burn, she quickly responded, “We were all drinking.” Although he hadn’t drunk that much and was likely very aware of what he was doing, there was no point in getting worked up over it. “It’s fine.”
Jayce laughed then, and she took a deep breath to steady herself.
“I also wanted to tell you, more of a request, really.” He paused, and she watched his shadow, seeing him rest against the tree. “To be careful tomorrow.”
“You could have commanded Karver to tell me that.” She crossed her arms under her chest.
“I could have, or even sent a letter.”
She felt her cheeks flush. Ugh, the letters.
“You have beautiful handwriting.” Her eyes widened at his comment. “I’d like more, even if they are to tell me how bad my dancing is.”
Overwhelmed by guilt, she sagged her shoulders and cast her gaze downward, consumed by introspection. Jayce was genuinely nice, and here she was, being an asshole.
“If I survive—”
“When.” He cut her off. “You survive.”
She swallowed roughly. “I’ll write Karver’s resignation so he can come home with me; I’m sure I’d treat him better, anyhow.”
That got a hearty laugh out of Jayce, and although she couldn’t pinpoint the reason, it made her smile.
“Do me a favor, okay?” The tone in his voice changed, and it pulled the smile from her so quickly it surprised even her.
“Sure.” She stepped towards his shadow, her hand pressing against the tree. There was no explaining it, but it felt as though his hand was slipping through the trunk and holding hers. In the silence, she allowed for the moment of strange safety it provided.
“Give them hell, Azahara.”
There was a smile that lined her lips, and she felt her eyes burning with tears that threatened to fall. The scent of the night clung to him, a blend of worldliness and peppermint.
It reminded her of home.
“I will,” she whispered.
“Officer Cross is coming back to save you from me,” he said with a resounding sigh.
Azahara craned her neck to look over her shoulder, seeing that Karver was coming back towards her.
“In all seriousness, lean on him,” he said as she stepped away. “Be safe, please.”
Pressing her lips together, she nodded her head. “I promise.”
A chuckle was all she received before she felt him walk away.
It felt as if that would be the final conversation she would ever have with him, and it gnawed at her.
She wondered whether regret would consume her if something happened and she hadn’t forced him to come into view.
At the very least, she wished he would confront her face-to-face as he demanded her safety.
“Goodbye, Jayce.” A soft breeze whispered through the air, gently catching her hair and swirling it around her face, causing her to smile.
Placing her hands by her side, she walked back to camp alongside Karver while the sense of dread she had experienced began to resurface gradually.
Tomorrow, she would not awaken to a day filled with uncertainties.
Instead, it would be a day defined by certainties, a day of battling for a kingdom that held no significance to her.
She would shed blood for a king who slumbered in his bed, oblivious to the impending struggle on the morrow.
This battle would be fought solely for them: for Kaed, Broan, and all the people of the Idle Fox. It was fought for the family that had taken them in after Howl, for the kind-hearted people of Shubae who had shown them kindness, and above all, for Zhal, who was fighting for her life.
Thall would pay with his life, and she would be there to collect the debt.