Chapter Twenty-Four #2
I’m definitely not tan—I’m way too pale to do anything except burn spectacularly—but her smile is contagious. “Hi. I missed you too.”
Yasmin follows behind Rika at a much more sedate pace, hauling a duffle bag and a backpack. “Thanks for coming to get us.”
They turn to Nathan, extending a hand. “I’m Yasmin.”
“Nathan.” He gives Yasmin that quarter of a smile, shaking their hand. “Nice to meet you.”
“Oh, so you’re Nathan!” Rika grins and gives his hand a very enthusiastic shake. “You’re responsible for finally making Harlowe watch Jaws.”
Nathan laughs. “I can’t say I did it on purpose, but yeah, I guess so.”
“He also knows random shark facts,” I say, “in case your Wikipedia dive didn’t provide enough of those.”
“Awesome.” Rika gives him a thumbs-up and turns to me. “So when do we get to visit your adorable cottage?”
My stomach lurches uncomfortably. “Well, um . . . it’s kind of late. How about we just grab some dinner and then take your
stuff to your rental?”
“Yes, please,” Yasmin says. “I’m starving.”
Rika gives them a look. “Babe, I told you to just buy something on the ferry.”
“I don’t need to pay ten dollars for a bag of chips.”
“You regularly pay ten dollars for doughnuts.”
“Yes. Multiple doughnuts.”
“If you want doughnuts,” Nathan says, “I have a really good recommendation in Eastham.”
Yasmin’s face lights up. “I definitely want that.”
Rika rolls her eyes. “Okay, let’s get some food. What’s good and cheap?”
“How do you feel about bar food?” Nathan asks.
“Are there french fries?”
“Multiple varieties, and onion rings,” he says with a smile.
“I’m in,” Rika says. “Let’s go.”
We take Rika and Yasmin to the Old Colony Tap, which Rika immediately announces she’s in love with. Yasmin seems taken with
the old arcade games, which leads to a whole conversation between them and Nathan, comparing favorite old video games. I pull
out the guilt blanket and hand it over to Rika and Yasmin, who are both thrilled with it, and this leads to a discussion of
what “gay spots” the two of them should be sure to hit over the weekend.
I keep stealing glances at Nathan, out of the corner of my eye, as we eat our way through french fries and burgers, Sharon’s
words still sitting in the front of my mind. But the line of tension in his shoulders is gone. He grins and laughs, talking
easily, just like he did the first time I saw him here, with Katy and Marcus.
I move my knee, just a little, until it knocks against his. He doesn’t move away.
The sun is sinking by the time we leave, all piling into my Honda to drive to Rika and Yasmin’s rental on a narrow strip of
land halfway between Provincetown and Truro, with the ocean on one side and a large body of water called East Harbor on the
other. Here, for a few miles, there’s nothing but Route 6, beach, and a bunch of little shacks dotting the shore.
Rika and Yasmin’s rental is right in the middle, with a designated parking spot outside and a baby-blue front door. Inside,
there’s a small living room, a smaller bedroom, and a kitchen that’s so tiny it only has room for a sink, a mini fridge, and
a hot plate. But the shack is cute, decorated kind of coastal chic, with gray flooring and whitewashed walls and pillows printed
with starfish and sea turtles. There’s even a deck in the back, right on the beach, with two Adirondack chairs and a small
barbecue.
“Oh, this is perfect,” Rika says. She glances at Yasmin. “We can totally do it.”
“Yeah.” Yasmin nods. “Especially with the deck.”
“Do what?” I ask.
“Beach bash!” Rika says. “We were thinking it would be fun to invite your new friends over tomorrow night. You know, meet
everyone you’ve been hanging out with.” She turns to Nathan. “You free?”
He shrugs. “I should be.”
“Great.” She opens the single cabinet in the kitchen, revealing exactly two plates and two bowls. “Okay, I guess we’ll need
to get some paper plates. But whatever, we need to go shopping anyway.” She turns to me, eyebrows rising hopefully. “Would
you be up for a shopping expedition tomorrow?”
“Sure. We can go to Wellfleet Marketplace or something.”
“I love that you know everything around here now.” Rika grins. “You’ll have to show us. A grand tour. All your new haunts.”
I promise to drive them around to all the places I’ve been, and we make plans for me to pick them up after breakfast the next
day. And then we part ways. Rika and Yasmin want to take a sunset walk on the beach alone, and I realize, my stomach twisting,
that I’m happy to let them.
All I want is to be alone with Nathan.
“Your friends are nice,” Nathan says, as we leave the shack and head for my car. It feels like a peace offering. “Watching
movies with Rika must be a trip.”
“You have no idea.” I unlock the car. “She can make a queer argument for pretty much anything.”
He smiles at me and pulls open the passenger door.
We climb into the car, but I hesitate, fiddling with my keys. “Nathan, about earlier—”
“It’s fine,” he says quickly. “I get it.”
I want to ask what that means, because I’m not even sure what I was trying to say. But I don’t. Because for right now, we seem okay, and I want us to stay that way. I want to live in this moment with him for as long as I can.
“Do you want to come back to the cottage?” I ask. “Maybe for the night?”
He stills next to me. I’m not sure he’s breathing. I’m not sure I am either.
Then he slowly shakes his head. “Would you . . . would you mind if we just went to my place instead?”
I sink down in my seat, fingers loosening around the steering wheel. It was a ridiculous thing to suggest. I know it was.
My dad and Jackson will be there—for me at least, even if Nathan wouldn’t see them. And who knows whether the younger Nathan
might be in the bedroom.
But even so, I can’t help but feel hurt, though I don’t really know why.
“Sure.” I start the car, mustering a smile. “Let’s go to your place.”