Chapter 18
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Flick had cried so many times that morning and it wasn’t even nine o’clock. Every time she thought she had stopped, she’d find herself thinking about him and the tears would start all over again.
It all seemed so final, so quick. One minute she had been head over heels in love with Luke and the way he had been looking at her she felt sure he felt the same.
The next moment he was buying her the house which had put paid to any tentative thoughts she might have had about moving to Scotland with him, telling her it was just great sex and then leaving.
Yes, he’d be back in a few weeks, but only for a few days to pack up all his stuff then he’d be gone for good.
Had it really all been one-sided? Had she seen what she wanted to see? Somehow, she didn’t believe that. Tabitha was right, buying the house for her was an incredibly generous gift, Luke obviously cared for her a great deal to want to do that .
Maybe they should have had a conversation earlier about where this was going and if it had a future, then she wouldn’t have been so disappointed when it came to an end. But dating for such a short time seemed too early for talks of the future. She thought she had more time.
Maybe she should have taken the bull by the horns and told him she loved him.
Even if it had never led anywhere, at least he would have known he was loved.
He deserved that. After his last relationship where Martine laughed at him then dumped him when he told her he loved her, and with Sophie telling him she only saw him as a friend, he thought he was unlovable when nothing could be further from the truth.
Flick loved him, completely and utterly, and she should have given him that.
She sat up from where she was flopped on the sofa. She wanted him to have that. Even if it changed nothing, even if he didn’t feel the same, she wanted him to know he was loved, even if it was nothing more than a goodbye gift.
She grabbed her phone to call him before remembering he’d probably be on the plane right then or at least driving the five hours from Edinburgh to Skye. Besides, something like that should really be done face to face.
Making a snap decision, she decided she would book a flight and go and see him.
She certainly didn’t want to wait a few weeks to have this conversation.
She did a quick search for flights and, while there wasn’t one from Newquay that day or the next, there was one from Exeter that night, which would be a bit more of a drive but it was doable.
She quickly booked it before she could talk herself out of it.
After today there were no more workshops until next week, she could fly out tonight and fly back the next day.
The gift shop would just have to close for a couple of days. This suddenly felt too important.
Having made the decision, she felt a little better. It probably wouldn’t have the outcome she wanted, but at least he’d know.
She quickly had a shower, got dressed and went downstairs to help Rose with her painting workshop.
She bumped into Quinn as he was heading towards his own studio.
He frowned when he saw her. ‘Hey, you OK? You look like you’ve been crying.’
The tears she thought had gone filled her eyes again. ‘Luke left. We’re basically finished. He’s going up to oversee the renovations on his new house and then he said he would just be popping back to pack all his stuff and then leave for good.’
‘Yeah, he told me.’
‘Everything was so perfect between us, I’m not sure what went wrong.’
‘Yeah, he was pretty smitten with you, I thought he’d end up staying here but then…’ he trailed off.
‘But then what?’
Quinn chewed his lip as he studied her. ‘He heard you, on the phone last night, saying it was just great sex, just a bit of fun. He was heartbroken, he thought this was something more for the two of you.’
‘Wait, what? I never said that.’
‘That’s what he heard.’
She frantically tried to remember her conversation with Tabby the night before and what Luke could have heard to make him think that.
She gasped. ‘No, that’s what I told my friend I thought he thought.’
‘What?’ Quinn said in confusion.
She sighed. ‘As the house was going to be sold, I offered to come to Scotland with him and then he bought the house. I was chatting to my friend Tabby saying, well he clearly didn’t want me to come to Scotland with him, and I said, maybe he thinks all this was just great sex, just a bit of fun.
That’s what he heard me say and thinks that’s how I feel. ’
‘Christ, you two really need to talk to each other.’
‘I know, I wanted to, but I thought we had more time. It didn’t feel right bringing up a future so soon after we’d met.
And last night I asked him about seeing him again, I said I would come up and see him in Scotland and he said there was no point going all that way just for great sex. God, that’s why he said that.’
Her heart broke that she’d hurt him in that way.
‘Call him, explain that he was wrong,’ Quinn said. ‘I bet he’d be on the next plane home. He… adores you.’
She shook her head. ‘I’ve booked a flight, I’m going to see him tonight. I thought if it was going to end, he should at least know that I love him. I wanted to tell him to his face. I didn’t know if it would change anything but I wanted him to know.’
A huge smile grew on Quinn’s face. ‘You love him?’
‘Yes, so much.’
‘And you’re flying to Scotland to tell him that?’
‘Yes.’
‘A big gesture, he’s going to love that.’
An idea suddenly formed in her mind. ‘Yes, a big romantic gesture.’
She smiled as she came up with her plan and suddenly tonight couldn’t come soon enough.
After making a quick phone call, she hurried into Rose’s studio ready to help with her painting workshop.
They had three people coming today, Chloe, Amy and Michael.
The three of them were friends after meeting each other at other local brain injury support groups a few years before.
While their recovery and rehabilitation meant they were able to continue living the lives they had before their injury, to a large extent, the impact of their injuries had left them with other problems.
Because their issues were mental rather than physical, Rose didn’t need any help today, but she wanted Flick there as moral support. Flick joined her in her studio a few minutes before the guests arrived.
‘So what do you have planned for today?’ Flick said, taking a seat at the large table Rose had set up in the middle of the room so they could all work together .
‘We’re doing finger painting,’ Rose said, a big smile on her face.
Flick cringed. The last thing she wanted to do was patronise them, especially not with something so childish. ‘Isn’t that a bit simplistic?’
‘I tried it last night and as someone who has been painting professionally for nearly twenty years, let me tell you, I loved it. It was so freeing, and the feel of handling the paint with my fingers was wonderful. It also puts us all on a bit more of an even keel. My expertise as a painter largely comes from the skill of handling a brush. Without that I’m pretty much useless.
I think it will be a good way to help express their emotions about how their injury has affected them. ’
Flick still wasn’t so sure and that must have shown on her face.
‘Why don’t you try it today for yourself before you’re so quick to judge? Also I’ll give them the option, they can use brushes if they prefer.’
‘I think that’s a good idea and yes, I’m happy to join in with whatever you have planned. Right, I’ll go and meet them.’
She stood back up and walked down the hall towards the front door, trying not to look at Luke’s empty studio in case she started crying all over again.
She opened the door just as three people and a dog were walking up towards it.
‘Hello, are you here for the workshop?’
‘Yes hello, I’m Amy, this is Chloe, Michael and this handsome chap is Charlie,’ Amy said, referring to the black labrador.
Flick knew Charlie was Michael’s emotional support dog and went everywhere with him.
‘Hi, I’m Flick, I’m sort of in charge here. You’ll be working with Rose today doing some painting.’
They all said hello.
‘Is it OK to stroke Charlie? I don’t want to disturb him if he’s working,’ Flick said.
‘Oh no, you can stroke him,’ Michael said. ‘He’d be most offended if you didn’t.’
Flick laughed and gave Charlie some ear scratches.
His head was velvety soft and stroking him made a little of the pain she was feeling ebb away.
Maybe she needed to get herself a dog. He could join her on her morning and evening walks around the town and clifftops and it would be nice to have someone to talk to so she didn’t feel so alone. She pushed thoughts about Luke away.
‘I’ll take you down to Rose’s studio,’ Flick said.
She walked back down the hall and they followed her. Rose was waiting nervously and smiled when she saw them.
‘Hello, come in, I’m Rose.’
Flick did the introductions, making sure to include Charlie who seemed to be constantly wagging his tail.
They all sat down and Flick took coffee and tea orders and then phoned them up to Polly who was going to come down shortly with cakes, biscuits and Danishes.
‘So before we start, I wonder if you might feel comfortable talking about what you struggle with just so we can have a better understanding of what you’re going through,’ Rose said, gently. ‘No worries if you’d prefer not to.’