CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Blair
Then
I’d finally had enough. There had been plenty that took me to the brink with Scott.
But after the way he’d treated me at the Orchid Ball, I’d talked to Gam, not really wanting to share with anyone, even Carrie, what I was beginning to contemplate.
Mainly because I was scared I would back down.
Again. I wasn’t sure I wanted any of my friends holding me accountable if I wasn’t able to follow through with what I’d been thinking seriously about doing.
Gam said the best thing I could do, was figure out what the hell he’d really been doing.
I figured out quickly that it wasn’t anything good.
I’d researched how to catch cheaters in a very depressing Reddit room. I’d learned all sorts of horrible things and hoped Scott wasn’t doing some of the heinous things those men and women were doing to their spouses.
I shuddered.
But I already knew I had a problem. The case against Scott boiled down to long days at work, texting constantly, spending a long time in his home office, and taking Scarlett to conferences with him without asking me if I wanted to go first.
That, of course, didn’t count other damning evidence, like him not coming home from a conference when I had just given birth, going to a conference anyway when Sutton broke her arm, lying to me about why he was going to miss Sutton’s soccer game, treating me like utter crap at the Orchid Ball, and more.
Then I called Lana and found out about the daily lunches. It had become a standing arrangement that Scarlett and Scott would eat lunch together. Every. Single. Day.
What the hell?
I wasn’t even the slightest bit okay with that.
Then Gam had heard that he went out with Scarlett on Tuesday and Thursday nights to nice restaurants around Halliwell. That had been a kick in the stomach. He was dating her. I couldn’t look at it any other way than that.
Then I’d learned about hidden apps from that Redditt room, and my stomach sank. I knew it was more than a little sus that Scott seemed to be constantly texting and calling Scarlett but when I checked his phone, only the calls showed up. No texts whatsoever.
He always left his phone on his nightstand, face down of course, while he took a shower. One night, after I was sure he was in the shower, I lurched for his phone. I almost fell off the bed diving for it in my haste to get into his phone, check for hidden apps, and get out.
I righted myself just in time before crashing to the floor and bringing my spying session out in the open.
I held my breath as I looked for hidden apps. My heart broke a little when a text messaging app showed up. “Fuck,” I breathed. Even though I’d suspected it, it still hurt seeing that I was right.
Then I clicked into it.
The only texts there were between Scott and Scarlett, and they weren’t reassuring to say the least.
I knew I only had time to skim, so I just tried to scroll and stop every now and then to read a text or two.
Scarlett: I’m just saying—someone with a husband like you should take better care of herself.
Scott: She’s still beautiful. She just doesn’t care how she looks most of the time.
Ouch.
I scrolled some more, constantly afraid I was going to see naked pictures. So far, I hadn’t.
And then I saw a message that stopped my heart.
Scarlett: So, if she hadn’t gotten pregnant you wouldn’t have married her?
Scott: I don’t know. Probably not. I mean, I love her now. But I probably would’ve split things up in another week or so if she hadn’t gotten pregnant. Marriage and kids weren’t in my plans at that time.
Scarlett: You deserve more than settling, Scott. You deserve to choose someone after you’ve fallen for them, not before.
Scott: Well, we just have to make do with what life gives us.
I gasped out a sob, then. He had felt trapped into marrying me.
He’d never loved me. He was ‘making do’ with me.
My whole body was shaking. I needed to cry, to let my emotions out.
Instead, I had to send screen shots of the texts to myself, close out the app, and put the phone back where I’d found it.
I did it hurriedly. I knew he’d be back out of the shower any minute.
Part of me wanted to confront him right now.
The other part knew it would be better if I was calmer.
I heard him come into the room and felt him stop in front of the bed. He was looking down at me. I could feel his eyes on me. But I did my best to pretend I was asleep. I let out a sigh of relief when I heard him go back into the bathroom and do whatever else he needed to do before bedtime.
I rolled on my side, facing away from him. I could feel tears coming, and I didn’t want him to see them.
Apparently, he hadn’t had much left to do. I’d just gotten situated comfortably when he came out.
“Blair,” he whispered, shaking my shoulder slightly. “Are you okay?”
“Fine.” I made my voice sound normal.
“It’s just… you always wait to go to sleep so that we can fool around.
” He bent down and started kissing down my neck.
“Don’t you want me to make you scream, baby?
” he asked between kisses and sucking. I tried not to notice the instant pull, the wetness already growing between my legs.
I was still so damn attracted to him. But I had to be strong.
Plus, if I tried to have sex right now, I’d end up sobbing through it.
He’d want to know what was wrong, and I wanted to be more prepared when I confronted him about the texts.
For only about the fifth time in our entire marriage, I pulled away from him. I heard him suck in a breath. He was shocked. We always had sex before bed. Always.
“Too tired,” I got out. Tears were running down my cheeks, but I didn’t want him to hear it in my voice.
“Alright then.” He patted my shoulder. “Just get some rest.”