Chapter 37
thirty-seven
. . .
Violet
“Alright Vi, I think it’s time that you call it.” Mason gives my knee a small squeeze before moving his hand to rest higher up on my thigh.
“Probably for the best, I was getting a little motion sick trying to grade assignments in a car.” I slam my laptop shut and place it back into my bag. “I did manage to get through most of them though. How much time do we have left?”
“I’d say another two-ish hours depending on traffic.”
I scrunch my nose, “Gross. Has New York always been this far?”
“Yup. Is Eliana feeling better by the way?”
It had been about week since our makeshift date at the MRI center. “Mhmm. She was back in the lab on Wednesday and apologized to me like ten times even though I told her she didn’t need to.”
“That sounds familiar.”
“We are a Type A dream team.”
He pauses and shoots me a quick look. “Did you know Jake is taking another psych class next semester?”
“That’s surprising.” While he had managed to bring his grade up in PSYCH101 I never got the impression that he enjoyed the material.
“I thought so too.”
“So, we will be co-parenting our problem child again next semester?”
“I don’t think so. He already has a tutor lined up.”
“Oh? Anyone I know?”
“Eliana. I guess he hasn’t scared her off yet.”
“Or, she likes the fear. She was definitely getting some pleasure out of torturing him.”
There had to be an explanation as to why she didn’t tell me. Maybe she was worried I would scold her about spreading herself too thin. Probably because she was. As a chronic people-pleaser I could spot another one from a mile away.
“Well just so you know, when the semester ends and I’m no longer Jake’s TA, I don’t have to be impartial anymore. If he steps one toe out of line with my girl, I will break his kneecaps.”
“Could you at least wait until the end of my coaching season to do that?”
I deliberate for a few seconds. “Sorry but, no. Girl code is not bounded by hockey seasons. I act immediately. Your coaching season be damned.”
“Noted. If it makes you feel any better, I don’t think you need to worry too much.”
“Why? Because you’ll keep him in line?”
“No, because I know she will.” He lets out a small laugh. “Plus, I have a feeling he’s a lot more like his coach than he likes to lead on.”
“I’m not entirely sure I’m following.”
Mason gives my thigh a small squeeze before leaning over to give me a kiss on my cheek. “I’m sure you’ll find out soon enough.”
Two hours later, we arrive at our hotel in the center of the upper east side. It’s not until we are standing in line to check in that I realize the last time we spent a night together in a hotel ended with us…ending. I’m staring at nothing, recalling the feeling of my heart breaking— completely oblivious to the line of guests moving until Mason gently pulls me forward.
“You okay?” He whispers into my ear and wraps an arm around my waist.
“Yeah.” I say this knowing he can tell I’m lying.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, I’m just having a moment and being dramatic.”
“Vi.” His eyebrows knit together as he rubs a soothing hand up and down my back.
“Really. Please ignore me.”
“I know you’re really stressed right now. You can totally stay in the hotel room and work while I go to Connor’s award ceremony. I’m sure he would understand.”
I shake my head. “No, I want to go.” He waits patiently as I decide if my melodrama is worth speaking aloud.
“Violet, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. But I am here for you if you need me.”
“I just don’t want to hurt your feelings,” I mumble.
“You won’t. And even if you do that’s for me to worry about.”
I shake my head. “That’s not true. We’re in a relationship so of course if you’re upset that impacts me.”
“Fair enough. So how about you share your feelings and then I’ll share mine, and we can figure it out together?”
I blink once, then twice as I realize how smart that suggestion is. “Wow. You’re good. Are you sure you’re not the psychologist in the relationship?”
“Violet.”
“Okay fine. It’s just now occurring to me that hotels make me sad. Because of, ya know, Chicago.”
His face falls, and I can tell I’ve brought his mood down with mine. I should have just kept my thoughts to myself.
“I’m sorry, Vi. I hate that you have that memory of us. Hopefully we can replace some of those bad memories with good ones with weekend.” He winks in an attempt to lighten the mood.
“I feel like it’s so hard for me to move on from things. I just want to live in the moment but there’s a part of my brain I can’t turn off that always brings me back to times I’d like to leave buried.”
Mason wipes away a stray tear from my cheek that managed to fall without me noticing. “It’s okay if you can’t fully let go of the past Violet. All of what we went through brought us here. I just hope you know that I wouldn’t trade a single bad day of mine if it meant I had to give up a good day with you.”
I lean my head up to place a soft kiss on his lips. I want us both to shake off our hotel history and kissing his lips usually does a good job of wiping my mind’s slate clean. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring the vibes down.”
His face softens and he rests his forehead on mine.
“We’re here together now Violet, which is all that matters to me. Having you by my side is all that matters to me.”