Chapter 23 #2
“Uh, sorry?” he shook his head. “How would you like me to do this? Seriously. I’m going to need some hand-holding through this one. I’m not used to getting in trouble for good news.”
I sighed. “You aren’t in trouble for the efforts you’ve put in to locate my friend, Caz. I am eternally grateful for that.”
“What’s wrong then? Why are you upset?” His eyes were thick with confusion.
“I’m upset because you’re treating me like an outsider when you should have been including me in your planning to go rescue my friend from the start!” I shuddered, holding back heavier emotions. I didn’t want to start crying right then.
He just frowned. His hands twitched, likely trying to come wrap me in one of his fantastic hugs, but they stayed at his side. He knew now wasn’t the time.
“Caz, this is my friend,” I said. “One of the only two people I’ve had in my life. My entire life. Did you think I was just going to sit around and wait, sipping on tea and bread while you fetched her back here to me? No way in hell.”
“But …”
“I’m going with you. End of story.”
I started for the door, but Caz didn’t move. He stayed put, blocking my way.
“Caz, think about it,” I said. “Say it is Milly or Ella. When you arrive, how is she going to know that you’re there to help her and not do worse? How are you going to get her to trust you? To her, you’re just more elites, breaking her out of one prison to go to another.”
The wrinkles on his face deepened. “Uhhh.”
“You didn’t think about it from her perspective at all. Did you?” I asked, shaking my head. “Not that I can blame you, I guess. It’s hard to assume a perspective you’ve never lived.”
Caz looked away unhappily.
I didn’t enjoy it. At all. Regret welled up in me at the harshness of my pointing out the truth to him. He didn’t deserve it. Caz was trying. Trying hard. I had no idea the number of resources he’d expended trying to find them, but it had to be far more than I could ever have possessed on my own.
Not only that, after finding this lead with his own money and efforts, he’d been ready to charge off and storm the gates himself to bring her back, regardless of any consequences to himself.
He was trying. His heart was true. He just didn’t understand what it was like to be a clippy in his world.
“Hey,” I said in a much softer voice, closing the distance to him. “Thank you, Caz. Thank you for finding her. Thank you for being willing to go get her. That means a lot to me.”
I grabbed his collar and, much to his surprise, pulled his lips down to mine. I kissed him, soft and tender but without reservation. For an instant, I let myself go and showed him an intimacy of the moment. To let him know I meant my words and that also he meant something to me.
My dragon roared its agreement at the move. It liked being close to him. Pressed against him. On top of him.
My jaw abruptly tightened mid-kiss with unexplained tension. I pulled away sharply, my mouth open in shock.
“Uhhh,” I mumbled under the scrutiny of his furrowed brow. “Sorry about that. That’s never happened to me. My dragon must have really enjoyed the kiss.”
I ran a finger over my partially descended fangs as I spoke. Caz, meanwhile, wiped a single drip of blood away from where I had poked the skin.
“Mine too,” he growled, smiling broadly to show his own pointed teeth.
“I’ve never had fangs before,” I said in a tiny voice. “How do I make them go away?”
Caz chuckled. “Just calm yourself. Maybe shake your head, sometimes that helps to clear things up. When your dragon subsides, they will too.”
I did as he said, and after a few moments, they slid back up. I ran a finger over my teeth. They were smooth once more. But that didn’t change what had happened. I had fangs now.
“That’s going to take some getting used to,” I said, focusing hard to stay on topic and not be distracted by the changes happening to me. “But I’m still going with you, Caz.”
He nodded. “I’m gathering that.”
His eyes darted all over the place but never quite met mine. Meanwhile, he was rocking slightly from side to side.
“Yes?” I prompted.
“How?” he asked, clearly uncomfortable. “You, ah, you can’t …”
“Shift?” I asked, sparing him the embarrassment, as much fun as it might have been to see him wallow in it for a bit longer.
He shrugged.
I laughed. “Caz, I know what I am. I know my limitations. You aren’t hiding some big secret from me by whispering about it.”
“I know that,” he grunted before looking away again. “I’m still learning how to say it right. I never want you to think I’m doing it from a negative or judgmental place. I don’t want to hurt your feelings by saying it wrong.”
“Oh, Caz,” I said, half melting into him at the sincerity in his voice. “You don’t have to worry about that. I’m tougher than that.”
“I know.”
“Do you?” I peered up him. “Do you really? I don’t have any memories from before twenty-three years ago.
I don’t know how old I am. I woke up in a ditch, and since then, I’ve been hunted nonstop, running from a life of being some elite’s slave, or worse.
No peace. No safety. Ever. Then I was rejected by you in the middle of a slave market.
Trust me when I say I can handle the truth. I know what I am.”
I’d meant the jab about the market to be lighthearted, to ease things as I spoke, but it had the opposite effect. Caz’s face tightened and dark green thunderclouds grew in his eyes.
“I know you’re trying to brush that off, to make a lighthearted comment,” he said. “But I am going to undo that, Anna. I will show you, prove to you on every level, that I care. That I will do anything for you, give you anything I can. I don’t care what it takes. I will do that.”
His eyes started glowing silver-green as his dragon echoed the sentiment.
“But I’ll do that after we go get your friend back.”