13. Blake
BLAKE
I’ve been hungover before, but I’m pretty sure when I crack my eyes open, I’m experiencing death. Or pre-death. Or maybe it’s just torture—this dull, aching torture that’s radiating throughout my entire body. The kind that makes you wish for death.
Groaning, I slowly roll over, taking in my surroundings and realizing I’m not in my bedroom.
Oh shit!
Who the hell did I hook up with?
I bolt upright, instantly regretting the move.
My stomach roils while my head barks at me to be more fucking carefully.
Cradling my forehead, I squint at the room and… Hey, I know this place. I’ve been in here before.
Spying the corner of a little pink bed tucked behind a half wall, my eyes then track to the basket of toys and building blocks, then across to the drawers, framed pictures of Zander and Sienna littering the top. There’s a big image of Zoey hanging on the wall above it, and …
Why am I in their converted garage?
For a harrowing microsecond, I have the ugly thought that Zander and I got up to something we shouldn’t have and?—
No, no. He’s not a cheater, and I…
I was so fucking out of it last night, I can’t remember a thing.
I don’t know how I got in here.
I don’t know whose T-shirt I’m wearing or where any of my clothes are.
Sniffing my hair, I grimace and can’t even remember when I threw up, but I must have because I reek, and the taste in my mouth is vile.
My brain is dredging up memories from the day before.
There was nearly getting caught in the pharmacy. A shudder rolls through me until I remember the way Grady came to my aid. Shit. I would have been screwed without him.
Did I thank him?
I must have.
Please say I did.
We walked down the street for a little bit, and then I left him. I was antsy and…
A party.
I went to a party.
Some guy invited me in, and I walked through the front door, and it was all so familiar.
It made me miss Cleo, and when those guys smiled at me, I walked straight toward them.
There were some girls there, playing a drinking game, and they invited me to join.
I can’t remember what the game was, but we threw back shots, and I was laughing.
And…
And that’s it.
I don’t remember anything else, and now I’m here and… How did I get here?
“Shiiiiiit.” I groan, running a hand through my hair and hoping like hell that I didn’t call Wily.
He’s never seen my party side. I’ve tried to keep all of that carefully hidden away. I need to maintain my sweet-girl persona when I’m around my family. They’d be so disappointed if they knew.
I mean, Wily knows I’ve got some sass. We hassle each other relentlessly, but I’m pretty sure he’d be gutted if he knew what I’d been getting up to in Chicago.
Fuck. I didn’t give myself away last night, did I?
Dammit!
Shuffling to the edge of the bed, I swing my feet over and give myself a little minute, gripping the mattress as I sway and swallow.
Don’t throw up. Don’t throw up. Don’t throw up.
I’m pretty sure if I tried, there’d be nothing left in me anyway. I feel empty. Depleted. Pathetically weak.
Glancing to my right, I notice a glass of water and some Advil.
Is that for me?
It must be.
Thank you, sweet Sienna!
I’m assuming she was the one who got me changed and tucked up in bed. Why’d she give me her bed? Seriously, I’m so confused right now.
Downing the meds and forcing myself to drink the entire glass of water, I then wipe the drips off my bottom lip and slowly walk to the door.
Oh shit. I need to get my game face on before sneaking into Football Frat. I’m gonna try and make a beeline for the bathroom. I’m desperate for a shower. To wash off whatever I got up to last night.
I hate it when I can’t remember.
It’s so unnerving.
It’s happened to me a couple of times before, and the worst was when I woke up naked next to Simon and had no fucking clue what we’d gotten up to the night before. Nico and Cleo were in the bed beside us, and I had no memory of how we’d ended up in that room or where the room even was.
Some seedy motel.
Clothes were scattered all over the floor, and we were all as naked as the day we were born.
We’d obviously gotten down and dirty, but I couldn’t recall when or who I’d done it with, and… and I’d never felt so filthy in my entire life.
I tried to get back on track after that. I really did.
I pulled away from Cleo just a little and tried to focus on my studies, but I was so far behind on everything, catching up was impossible. And trying to avoid someone when you share a room—also impossible. Within a week, I was being pulled back to another party, and I had no willpower.
Shame shimmers through me, my shoulders twitching as I peek my head out the garage door and check that the coast is clear. All seems quiet as I count the cars in the driveway. Shit. Looks like everyone is home… and who does that camper van belong to ?
I frown, wrapping my arms around myself as I shuffle toward the back door. I’m in bare feet, which is the stupidest idea ever because the ground is fucking freezing!
Rising to my tiptoes, I dart up the back steps and into the warmth of the house, hoping to sneak up to the bathroom, but of course luck decides to give me the finger.
The second I close the kitchen door and spin, I’m greeted with two curious sets of eyes.
Sienna and Zoey are sitting at the small kitchen table. Zoey’s in her booster chair thingy, her face smeared with syrup as she messily devours her pancakes. Sienna’s adjacent to her, smiling up at me while I bulge my eyes and try to tame my wild curls… as if she hasn’t already seen me at my worst.
Her grin grows a little bigger. “It’s okay. Wily’s in the living room talking to my parents. You’re clear.”
I keep smoothing down my hair and force my good-girl smile into place, feeling pale and shaky as I pad across the kitchen floor.
“Good morning.” Ugh, my voice sounds so croaky. “Hey, Zoey. How are you, kiddo?”
Zoey nods with a grin, holding up her breakfast. “Pancake!”
“I can see that.” My stomach revolts at the sight of that sticky sweet mess, but I manage to keep my smile in place. I think. My teeth are clenched pretty tightly.
Sienna’s watching me, mercifully not saying a thing, although her gaze feels like judge and jury. I dart my eyes at her, and she’s not glaring or anything. Maybe it’s just me who feels like I deserve a hammer loudly falling, smacking down on the wood with a clear verdict .
You messed up last night, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
Shit, I want to ask just how bad it was. Who brought me home?
But my courage fails me, especially when Zander saunters in. The second he spots me, his face lights with a teasing smirk. As he brushes past me, he softly whispers, “Morning, party girl.”
I bulge my eyes at him, spitting out my usual defense. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, so you’re gonna play it like that? Okay.” He nods, moving around me to lift Sienna up so he can take a seat beneath her. She flops back onto his lap, feeding him a bite of pancake before grinning up at me.
I frown at their all-knowing expressions, hating how clueless I feel.
How bad was I? What did they see? Where did they find me?
Zander’s playful smile starts to fade as he obviously waits for some kind of explanation on my part. Maybe an apology?
With a soft sigh, he gives me a pointed look. “You know you spent the night in our bed, right? And we had to creep up to the room you’re sleeping in?”
I swallow and softly rasp, “W-why? Why didn’t I just go up to my room?”
Sienna winces. “Not sure you could have made it up there.”
“You smelled like a brewery and had puke all over your clothes,” Zander adds, driving that knife all the way in.
Shit! I can feel myself going pale. I must look translucent right now. Or maybe just a dull shade of gray or that puke-green color.
“Grady didn’t want to have to carry you up the stairs, right past the living room, and risk waking your brother,” Sienna explains.
“It didn’t help that you started singing sea shanties when he pulled into the driveway.” Zander laughs. “That’s why he came to us for help.”
Grady helped me? How did he even know where I was?
I glance at Zoey, wondering how much of this she’s absorbing. We probably shouldn’t be talking about this in front of her, right? She might run and blab to my brother.
She probably doesn’t even understand what you’re talking about. Just wrap this up and get to the bathroom already!
“Thankfully, this little one was with my parents last night, so moving up to your room wasn’t a big issue.” Sienna gives me a reassuring smile, but I don’t feel any better.
I’m so embarrassed.
Sea shanties?
Really?
And Grady had to carry me because I was so wasted I couldn’t even walk?
I don’t remember any of this!
Oh shit! Did he see me puke?
Humiliation washes through me in a wave so thick it nearly bowls me over.
I want to buckle under the pressure of it all, drop to my knees and wail my apologies before crawling into a dark corner and just sleeping the day away.
But I don’t get that chance, because before I can say anything else, a middle-aged couple with bright smiles and loud voices stroll into the kitchen.
“He is such an amazing young man,” the woman is saying.
“Yeah. He’s certainly coping well with what’s happened,” the man replies, smiling down at the woman before glancing up and noticing me. “Well, hello there!”
His voice is like a friendly boom box, but it still hurts my ears.
“Oh, you must be Blake,” the woman gushes, pulling me into a hug before I can stop her. “Sweet girl. Wily’s told us all about you. He’s so proud of his baby sister.”
The woman laughs right in my ear, and I pull out of the hug, fighting the urge to cry.
He shouldn’t be proud of me.
I’m a fucking train wreck.
“Blake, these are my parents.” Sienna starts the introductions, and I nod and smile the way I’m supposed to.
“You can call me Al.” Her dad winks at me, laughing, then starting to sing some song I don’t know.
“Dad, stop,” Sienna softly complains. “She doesn’t even know it.”
That only makes her father sing louder, and she starts to laugh and roll her eyes. Zoey claps along, giggling at her grandpa when he crouches down and starts singing to her.
“Doooo, do-do, do, do,” he sings. “Can you do that, lil’ bug?”
“Do-do-do-do-do,” she sings, and I back away from the cacophony, my head threatening to split right open.
My brain is pounding, its swollen edges bumping against my unforgiving skull .
I think I’m gonna be sick again.
“Need a coffee?” Zander points to the counter, indicating the mugs, but I shake my head.
What I need to do is get the hell out of this kitchen.
“I’m just gonna…” I point to the hallway, my slow-ass brain trying to figure out the quickest path to escape, but it soon gets blocked by my giant brother.
He fills up the frame, leaning on his crutches and smiling down at Zoey.
“How’s my cowgirl?”
“Hey, Wywee!” She waves her sticky little fingers at him. “Pancake!”
“Oooo, yum. I’m gonna have to get me some of those? Are they a Grady special?”
“They are.” Zander nods, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Then I’ll have to get a whole stack.”
I try not to react to the sound of Grady’s name.
He brought me home last night.
He didn’t tell Wily.
How did he know not to tell?
How did he know where I was?
“Hey, sis.” Wily finally notices me, beaming brightly as he hobbles into the room. “Haven’t seen you all morning.”
“Oh yeah, I just…” My voice trails off when his eyes narrow at me.
“You okay? You’re looking kind of pale.”
I blink, scrambling to come up with a good excuse. “I didn’t…” Sucking in a breath, I let it out in a rush, along with my lame-ass explanation. “Sleep very well last night. I’ve got a bit of a headache now.” I rub my forehead.
Wily frowns, giving my chin a soft, affectionate little nudge with his knuckles. “You’re working too hard, sis. I didn’t even hear you get home from the library last night. Did you Uber?”
“Uh-huh.” I nod, my chest squeezing so tight it hurts to breathe.
“You should have called me. I could have sent one of the guys to come get you.”
“I didn’t want to be a bother.” I cross my arms, my eyes darting to Zander, then flashing back to my big bro. Shit, is my face turning red?
“Look, why don’t you take the day off and chill?” Wily rests his huge hand on my shoulder. “Stop studying every spare second and just relax.”
“Yeah.” I punch out a croaky laugh, glancing at Sienna, who’s giving me a pained frown. “I’m gonna go… take a shower.”
I move around my brother and make a beeline for the hallway, cringing when I hear him say, “What am I gonna do with her? She’s working so hard to be here and look after me. How do I get her back to Chicago where she belongs?”
His questions make me shudder.
Shit! He has no idea, and I feel like crap keeping him in the dark this way.
But how am I ever supposed to tell him what a fuckup his perfect little sister has become?
No one can know about my academic suspension. I couldn’t face it and decided to withdraw before shit really hit the fan. Like a coward, I quietly exited the school, and no one can ever know why.
This is my shame to bear.
But something is gonna have to come out eventually, which means I need to fabricate a plausible story for why I’ll never be returning to Chicago.
Reaching the top of the stairs, I walk into my room and gather up some fresh clothes, bundling them against me before spinning toward the bathroom.
But I don’t even make it out my bedroom door…
Because a tall, sexy-ass Grady is blocking my way. His brown gaze is dark with concern… and a knowing look that makes my insides writhe.
Shit. I so cannot deal with this right now.