Chapter 10 A Heartfelt Re #3
His silent encouragement conferred strength, and I raised my chin to observe my uncle Barton.
“I have a clear memory of a conversation we had ten years ago. You told me that I lacked a dowry because my father had made an unfortunate investment. You went on to characterise Uncle Gardiner as a disreputable man from whom I needed to be shielded. Why did you tell me these falsehoods?”
Uncle Barton rubbed his temple. “Much of my past conduct is regrettable, but at least I may acquit myself with regard to your family’s loss of funds.
Some months after Rebecca’s death, I searched her desk for any documents of import.
I found a letter from a London bank stating that the account that had been opened for your late mother had been liquidated of the entire sum of five thousand pounds six months before the illness struck your family.
Rebecca had several other papers pertaining to a barren silver mine in which your late father had invested. ”
“You cannot hide from the facts.” My uncle Gardiner ground his teeth.
“Yes, my late brother-in-law made a foolish investment or two over the years, but he did so with money he inherited from an elderly uncle. Your late wife possessed documentation of the investments I made in Elizabeth’s name.
After her death, I sent annual summaries of the funds to you.
My niece has more than fourteen thousand pounds to her name. ”
Cassie gasped and raised a hand to her mouth.
“No, that cannot be true!” Despite the force of Uncle Barton’s response, a shade of uncertainty coloured his words.
“I thought you might persist in denying the truth.” Uncle Gardiner removed a piece of paper from his coat pocket and unfolded it. He stood and held the document before Uncle Barton. “This account statement shows the current value of Elizabeth’s funds.”
Uncle Barton paled as he perused the paper. He sank lower in his seat. “Upon my word, I…I had no idea.”
“I have provided you a statement of Elizabeth’s funds each year.”
“Nevertheless, I never opened anything you sent. No doubt my wife kept the records you furnished her with, yet my search of her belongings focused upon notices from banks or solicitors. I never read any of her personal correspondence.”
My uncle Gardiner returned to his seat, glowering at Uncle Barton. “Your statement, if true, reveals you to have been preposterous and irresponsible.”
“You must believe me, Lizzy.” Uncle Barton met my gaze. “I had no knowledge of this money. If I had, you would have been made aware of the funds, and I should never have accepted Mr. Darcy’s offer for Lily. I agreed to that sale for you, so you would have a source of income.”
“Under the circumstances, I cannot accept that money.”
His head lowered. “For all these years I have wronged you. I am heartily sorry.”
“Did my aunt Barton never mention the funds I inherited?”
“No, she…um…understood that I did not want to be bothered with such details.”
“Why should that be?”
He shook his head. “To my shame, I did not welcome the news that Mr. Bennet wanted my wife and me to be your guardians. Rather, I tried to convince Rebecca that we should refuse the responsibility. At the time, I thought the added burden would detract from the attention my son and daughter would receive from her.”
A gasp passed my lips as the verity of his statement impressed upon me. Had I not suspected as a child that Uncle Barton had resented my presence?
“But my wife would not hear of anyone else taking you in, and I could never deny her anything she truly wanted. So, you joined our household, and I…” He recoiled and his shoulders hunched. “I avoided you as much as possible. Rebecca knew my perspective, and she almost never mentioned you to me.”
To her credit, Aunt Barton had shielded me well from her husband’s animosity. She would make excuses for his lack of attention to me and often stated how much she loved and appreciated me.
“My concerns proved to be false, and Rebecca was never happier than in those final years of her life—the time she spent as your guardian. Even I could not help but notice how well you got on with Cassie and Noah. Yet my obstinate nature and my pride would not allow me to acknowledge your presence as an advantage. Two years after Rebecca’s death, when you began riding on horseback, I finally paid attention to you and recognised your sweet nature.
And then I realised that having you here has been a gift to all of us.
” A shimmer of moisture flickered in his eyes.
“Why did you cause this estrangement from my uncle Gardiner? What made you turn so decidedly against him?”
“I cannot excuse my behaviour, but I shall attempt to explain how this came about.” Uncle Barton tugged on his cravat.
“Since the early years of my childhood, my parents had instilled in me the importance of preserving the separation of classes. Many in my circle concurred with this principle, including my first wife. Yet Rebecca insisted that the boundaries need not be stringent. When she first broached the subject of inviting your uncle to our home, I refused her. But she would not relent. She argued that we needed to do this for your sake. Despite my misgivings, I could not continue to deny Rebecca. I should have done anything for her.”
Uncle Barton brushed his hand over his chin.
“But everything changed when Rebecca and our baby boy died.
I succumbed to grief, anger, and self-pity.
I left for town, drank away the nights, and slept during the days.
In a rare instance of sobriety, I wrote to Mr. Gardiner, informing him that he would not be welcomed in either of my homes again.
“One night I wandered into a gambling hall on Bond Street, and for a few hours, I found an escape from the relentless pain that plagued my every waking hour. Before long, I became a gamester. Then one evening I entered the street after hours of liquor and cards and stumbled into a man known to me.”
He turned towards Uncle Gardiner. “I was utterly ashamed to have been seen in that state by you, of all people, for I believed you to be beneath me. Although I attempted to explain that I had been to the nearby inn for a meal, I knew I had not fooled you. After that humiliation, my resolve to keep you away from Lizzy became stronger than ever.”
My uncle Barton’s gaze returned to me. “I told myself that I acted in your best interest. I believed you to be penniless, and I thought your connexion to a tradesman would harm your future prospects.”
With a convulsive inhalation, my entire body grew rigid. This is why he estranged me from my uncle Gardiner? “How could you have been so arrogant—so selfish?”
“I am disgusted by your deception, Father.” Noah’s harsh inflexion drew my gaze. Fire raged in his brown eyes. “You have dissembled to all of us for years and deprived Lizzy of her uncle, all to preserve your inflated sense of pride!”
My uncle Barton lowered his head. “My conduct is indefensible, so I understand why you all must be disappointed in me. Instead of honouring my dear wife’s wishes, I acted to preserve my own comfort and ensure no one would challenge my decision.
” He sent me a brief look. “I withheld Mr. Gardiner’s letters to you for the same reason.
I did not want you to press me for permission to see him. ”
My hands curled into tight balls. “You had no right to keep those letters from me!”
“No, I did not. I am heartily sorry.” Uncle Barton glanced at Noah and Mr. Hayward.
“Over the years, I have felt enormous guilt over these falsehoods. I wanted to reverse my mistake and yet…” He blinked, his eyes shiny.
“The truth is, I lacked the courage. But it is a relief to dispense with this mendacity. My apology extends to you all.” His sight shifted to my uncle Gardiner.
“And most especially to you, Mr. Gardiner.”
Seconds elapsed, and the harsh glint in Uncle Gardiner’s irises dissipated.
With his crumpled posture and the slight quiver that affected his hands, Uncle Barton appeared defeated.
The stark and wretched nature of his confession eroded my energy—along with the majority of my ire for him.
Despite his abhorrent actions, I could not bring myself to view him with contempt.
This man had taught me how to ride and shoot, encouraged me to read and learn a variety of subjects, and allowed me to pursue the activities that interested me. Despite everything, I loved him.
With a cough, I found my voice. “As a child, I often wished for someone who could tell me about my mother, father, and sister. This past week, my uncle Gardiner has patiently answered my many questions, providing a description of their natures I never had before.” My sight veered briefly to the others present.
“I am grateful to Mr. Darcy and to Mr. and Mrs. Hayward for the steps they took to allow me this time with the Gardiners, and I have accepted my aunt Gardiner’s invitation to stay at their home in town and meet my young cousins.
I have not yet decided whether I shall travel to London with them or go there at a later date. ”
With my vision fixed upon Uncle Barton, I steadied my attitude. “Now that the truth has been revealed, I hope we may all begin anew and put this unpleasantness behind us.”
Uncle Barton raised his eyes to me. “That is most gracious of you, Lizzy.” A quaver hindered his words. He beheld my aunt and uncle. “Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner, I want to extend an invitation to you both. On this or any future visit to the area, you are welcome to be guests at Knight’s Manor.”
Aunt Gardiner placed a hand on Uncle Gardiner’s arm. “Thank you for the offer, Mr. Barton.”
For a long moment, my uncle Gardiner stared at Uncle Barton as though pondering an enigma. Then he drew in a slow breath. “My niece is correct. There would be no benefit in holding on to rancour, and my priority has always been to act in her best interest. I am willing to disregard the past.”
“I thank you.” Uncle Barton reposed in his chair. “How long do you plan to remain in the area?”
“We must return to town on Tuesday.”
Uncle Barton rested his folded hands upon his chin. “It is a shame you will depart so soon. With your approval, I should like to hold a party at Knight’s Manor tomorrow in your honour. I shall inform my neighbours that my former opinion of you was faulty.”
“Thank you.” Uncle Gardiner spoke in a measured cadence. “My wife and I should be pleased to attend.”
“That is splendid.”
With the tension in the room abated, Mrs. Hayward asked Uncle Gardiner whether he and his wife had seen the latest production at the Covent Garden Theatre.
A general conversation ensued on the merits and weaknesses of several popular actors and actresses.
I followed the good-natured discussion until Mr. Darcy lowered his head near mine, and a pleasant shiver distracted me.
“I hope today’s discussion has unfolded to your satisfaction.”
“Indeed, I could not have foreseen a better conclusion.” I moved to fully face him. “I cannot thank you enough for all you have done to make my reunion with my uncle Gardiner possible.” When he grimaced, my abdomen tensed. How had I displeased him? “Pray tell me, what is wrong?”
“I should do anything in my power to assist you, for any service I may render you is a rewarding endeavour. Yet the last thing I want is for you to feel an obligation to me. No matter what you may decide with regard to us, you owe me nothing.”
His intent gaze stole my focus, delaying my response. “Very well. I shall keep that in mind.”
“Furthermore, I should not want Lily to influence your decision in any way. Once you reach your majority, you will have the funds to purchase her.”
“Yes, I shall be able to afford the one thousand pounds in May.”
“No, I shall sell her to you for a more reasonable sum—forty guineas will be sufficient.”
Forty guineas? My eyebrow arched. “That would be a most regrettable investment for you. Buying high and selling low is not a sound way to conduct business.” I used a soft tone lest he take offence at my little gibe.
“In general, that is true, but not in this instance, for I have received more than my money’s worth with Lily. She has allowed me to spend many priceless hours in your company.”
Under his ardent gaze, my first instinct—to protest his statement—faded away, and a rush of warmth flooded my person. “That is the finest compliment I have ever received.”
His lips raised at the corners, diminishing the fervour in his expression whilst increasing his allure. “Since I lack the talent and eloquence to impress you with fine speeches or pretty verses, I am well gratified.”