Chapter 25
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Ozen felt a little like he was swimming against the current. He knew the week would be long with Taron away. He just forgot how much his friend took off his plate. He would need to send Taron a gift once he was back, because Ozen wouldn’t be able to run this company without him.
He was so busy, he was forgetting things. Usually, he had to get Collette to bring him whatever he left behind, but thankfully this time, he remembered before he got into the elevator. He went back for his phone, grumbling to himself. It was something he couldn’t leave behind. Collette looked amused, raising an eyebrow at him.
“Forget something again?”
“Taron’s return can’t come quick enough,” he said tersely in reply.
She chuckled, turning back to her computer as he stepped into his office. He came to an abrupt halt, his eyes landing on Avery. His feeder was scrubbing at his face, trying desperately to hide the fact that he had been crying. All thoughts of meetings were wiped away in an instant, and Ozen hurried to his side, kneeling by the couch.
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” Avery insisted, though his chin trembled and he couldn’t stop the tears from slipping down his cheeks. His continence broke, and he sobbed again, dropping his face into his hands.
Ozen was unsure of what to do. Avery seemed fine when he left. Tired, but that was to be expected. It was unfortunate how many quick feeds he’d needed this week. No matter how many times he tried to make himself stretch out the time between when he saw Avery, it never seemed to work. It wasn’t easy on the feeder when quick feeds happened, but Avery didn’t let on that it was bothering him. Ozen didn’t realize he was putting on a brave face.
“Is everything alright?” Collette asked from the door. Ozen had been in such a rush, he hadn’t closed it behind him. Good, that would make this easier.
“Cancel my meetings for the rest of the afternoon.”
“N-No!” Avery wailed. “I-I-I–I’m fine!”
Ozen ignored him, scooping him off the couch and into his arms. He headed for the bedroom so he could at least get Avery more comfortable. Now that he was paying attention, he could see how low Avery’s energy levels were. He was exhausted, and Ozen was at least partially, if not fully, to blame for that. He would never forgive himself for upsetting such a beautiful soul.
Inside the dark room, Ozen set Avery on the bed, combing his fingers through Avery’s golden curls. His body shook with his sobs and his breath came out in sharp gasps. He wanted to push Avery to talk to him, but now was not the time. Not while he was so upset.
He waited a few moments for Avery to calm down, but his poor feeder seemed beside himself. He sobbed into his hands, hiding his face, until a hiccuping plea finally gave Ozen a clue of what to do.
“I-I can’t stop!”
Ozen climbed into bed, pulling Avery against his chest. He tried using his magic to soothe Avery, but it only set him off more.
“N-No! You just ate! You shouldn’t waste it–”
“Avery… Your comfort is not a waste. Hush now. Let me help you.”
He shook his head rapidly, refusing. Ozen’s chest ached, watching Avery fall apart. He couldn’t handle seeing someone usually so bright and happy falling to pieces like that. It felt wrong. Especially because Avery was his to protect. He promised he wouldn’t let Avery get hurt.
Using the smallest amount of his magic possible, since he knew it’d only upset Avery if he used too much, he soothed Avery’s mind little by little. The sobs slowed and the hiccuping breaths evened out, and eventually, Avery fell asleep with his head pillowed on Ozen’s chest. Ozen got them more comfortable, cuddling Avery close, and he refused to move an inch until Avery woke up. He was disgusted with himself for letting it get this bad. He should have paid more attention. Quick feeds were exhausting, he knew that. He had hoped Avery would rest afterward, but knowing him, he went back to work the moment he was strong enough to stand.
While he waited for Avery to wake up, Ozen watched him sleep, taking in the little details he’d missed this past week. The light from the open doorway was enough that Ozen could see the dark circles under Avery’s eyes, his normally pristine suit rumpled and his tie crooked. How much of that was just from the feeding, Ozen wasn’t sure. He didn’t even think about it. Avery was always quick to tell Ozen he was fine and for him to return to work, and Ozen didn’t question him. He’d been grateful that Avery had understood and rushed out without a backwards glance. Idiot, idiot, idiot.
Trailing his knuckles down Avery’s tear stained cheek, he silently vowed to do better. A busy week was no excuse to treat his feeder so poorly. Avery was the best feeder Ozen had ever had. If he didn’t want to lose him, he had to do better.
Avery was out for several hours. Ozen expected that and didn’t begrudge him. His energy levels were still severely low when he opened his eyes. He woke up with a sharp gasp, so Ozen knew he didn’t wake up because he was refreshed. More likely, Avery woke himself up because he was dedicated to his job.
When he tried to sit up, Ozen pushed him back down with a gentle hand on his chest. “Shh… You’re not needed anywhere. Relax.”
Avery looked confused, his eyes darting around. “But–”
“No buts. You’re exhausted, Avery. There is nothing more important than you getting your rest.”
From the look on his face, Avery didn’t agree. Now wasn’t the time to argue, Ozen knew that, but he had to ask, “Why didn’t you tell me? I never wanted to hurt you. You should have told me I was being too demanding on you.”
Avery’s brow furrowed as he frowned up at Ozen. “What are you talking about?”
“I’ve been demanding too much of you. Quick feeds are rough on a feeder. I should have insisted you take the week off when I knew Taron would be out.”
“But–” Avery protested again.
“No, Avery. I understand you want to continue to be a temp, but you can’t do both jobs effectively, not all the time. Had it been a normal week, I know you would have been just fine, but because I was too busy to care for you properly, you suffered, and for that, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again. However, I have to insist that if I have a need for a quick feed that you take the day to rest and recover. Feedings take a toll on you and I don’t want you wearing yourself out.”
“I…” Avery sucked in a shaky breath, his chin trembling ever so slightly like he was fighting back tears again. “I don’t blame you. I just… Things would’ve been easier if I was up here this week. I…” He trailed off, turning his face away. Something about his sentence made Ozen pause, and he frowned, catching Avery’s chin to force him to face Ozen again.
“What do you mean by that? Why would it have been easier up here? Did something happen?”
Avery’s expression shuttered, and he tucked his chin, defiance barely masking the underlying pain. It wasn’t just the feedings then. Something else had contributed to Avery’s breakdown.
“Avery. I told you, if you ever needed me then–”
“There was nothing you could have done. I’m fine.”
“You’re lying,” Ozen snapped. His brusque response startled Avery enough that his gaze finally lifted, locking eyes with Ozen. His eyes swam with unshed tears, and his face was pale. Whatever upset him, it was bad enough that he was hiding it from Ozen, and that irritated him.
“Either you can tell me, or I can go down to the research floor and find out for myself. What happened that upset you so much?”
Avery looked away again, and a few tears slipped out. Ozen brushed them away gently. He would be patient–for now–and give Avery the chance to explain himself, but the fury was already building. Ozen was already angry at himself for the way he treated Avery. To realize that he had missed something troubling his feeder right under his nose was unimaginable.
“I… I guess I got used to being up here where everyone accepted me. Comments and gossip are par for the course as a human, but… a few people took issue with me being a feeder too. They yelled at me for showing up late, or taking a long lunch, and got frustrated when I didn’t move as quickly as they would have liked. I was trying my best, but between the exhaustion and the comments, I guess I just got overwhelmed. I promise I’ll do better next week. I haven’t had time to figure out my next assignment yet, but I’ll manage my time better and–”
A snarl ripped through Ozen. He felt his control slip, and with it his grip on his glamor. Avery’s eyes went wide, locked on the horns on Ozen’s head. His focus was diverted when Ozen’s tail lashed around, giving away his mood entirely. His skin took on an unnatural hue, and he knew he glowed whenever he released his glamor. Incubi were made to draw people in, especially in their looks. Like moths to a flame.
“You’re beautiful…” Avery breathed.
The compliment drew Ozen’s attention away from his violent mood. He looked down at the man still wrapped in his arms, forcing himself to take a breath. He would not be taking his mood out on Avery. He didn’t deserve that for being honest. Cupping Avery’s cheek, Ozen leaned until he could press their foreheads together, giving himself a moment to deal with his emotions. Once he felt more stable, he opened his eyes, smiling at the dazed look on Avery’s face. He effortlessly brought his glamor back up, tucking away that part of himself that he didn’t show often. He didn't like it. It felt less like consent when people threw themselves at you because of your magic.
Avery blinked a few times, surprised. “Uh… What just happened?”
“An incubus’s true form is… dangerous, in my opinion. It’s like my magic in physical form and can lead to people making questionable decisions to get close to me. I try not to drop the glamor often.”
“But you had wings. And a tail,” Avery pointed out. “Doesn’t it get uncomfortable to hide them all the time?”
He paused. No one had ever asked him that before, and he wasn’t sure how to respond. “How much do you know about glamors?”
“Not much. Most of the supernaturals I know who use them do it to avoid discrimination or hide the things that people might target them for.”
He nodded. That was mostly true. There were only a few minute details he was missing. “They are also used to block certain kinds of magic. Like mine. There are regulations on incubi and their true forms. There are some who assert that an incubus’s true form removes the ability to provide consent. They tried to make laws banning our true forms entirely, but they never passed. There were too many nuances that made the laws difficult to enforce and easy to bypass. It is understood that a true form should only be used sparingly, and most incubi choose to hide it unless they’re somewhere they’re comfortable and all parties involved consented beforehand to its usage. I use my glamor for that reason. But no, it isn’t uncomfortable. I’ve been using the magic for so long, I don’t even notice it anymore.”
Avery looked curious but not at all judgmental. And Ozen’s outburst provided enough distraction for the both of them that their moods settled a little. Ozen chose to take the win for what it was, and for a little while, he laid with Avery and answered the questions he had about magic he wasn’t familiar with. It was a simple thing, cuddling and taking part in pillow talk, but while desire fed his magic, it felt to Ozen that moments like this fed his soul.