Chapter 16
HARLOW
Ashrill sound penetrates the deep sleep I’ve been in.
“Ugh,” I groan, tossing my arm over my face. “Make it stop.”
I don’t know whether Jameson listens to me or if maybe God himself has heard my plea but it does stop.
Rolling over, I pull the covers up to my chin. Before I have a chance to doze back off, the ringing starts up again.
“What is that?” I push against Jae’s shoulder. “Turn it off.”
He yawns sleepily. “It’s your phone.”
The sound cuts off again before starting back up.
Finally, reality infiltrates my sleep addled brain and I sit straight up, the covers pooling at my waist. “Oh my God.”
For my phone to keep ringing like that, something must be wrong. Nobody ever calls me back-to-back like that. My mouth parts with fear.
Monroe.
Tumbling out of the bed I get a peek at the clock on the nightstand and see that it’s after eleven in the morning.
Grabbing one of Jae’s shirts I tug it over my naked body—stupid, I know, but for some reason I can’t fathom the idea of answering the phone completely naked.
Locating my phone, I answer just before it cuts off again. “Hello?”
I realize I didn’t even look at the caller ID to see who it was, but I’m unfortunately not surprised when Spencer speaks. “Thank fuck, why weren’t you answering your phone?”
“I—”
“That’s not important,” he interrupts my explanation. “You need to get to the hospital.”
“Hospital?” It feels like all the blood drains from my body. “What’s wrong? What happened?” When he doesn’t respond in zero-point-two seconds I scream into the phone, “Tell me, dammit!”
Frantically, I scour the drawers for clothes I keep here. Pulling out a pair of cotton shorts I yank them on, not bothering with panties.
“I was right there with her—”
“Spencer”—I cry, panic overloading me— “is she okay? What the fuck, of course she’s not, you’re at the hospital.” I slap my forehead and go back to searching for clothes. I need a bra and a t-shirt and … shoes. Shoes are important.
By now, Jameson is sitting up in bed and he looks as scared as I do.
“I was teaching her to skateboard, and she fell—I swear it was a small fall, Harlow, but she landed on her arm wrong and—”
“And what?” I nearly shout. “What happened?”
“It’s broken. She’s going to have to get a cast.”
Air leaves my body. “How bad?”
“She doesn’t need surgery.”
“Dammit, Spencer. How did you let this happen? You have to be more responsible!” I know later I’ll feel bad for berating him, but right now I’m livid and scared. “Did she cry?”
He gives a laugh that entirely lacks humor. “No, not at all, but I noticed it didn’t look right and brought her here. She’s a tough cookie.”
“Which hospital are you at? I’ll be there as fast as I can.”
He lets me know and I hang up to put on a bra and switch to one of my own shirts. Stuffing my feet into a ratty pair of sneakers I left here a few weeks ago, I find Jameson standing there ready to go, keys in hand.
“Thank you,” I mouth.
He nods toward the door. “Let's go.”
Running up to the reception desk in the ER, Jameson on my heels, I grip the sparkly stone counter in my hands and force a smile at the lady working there.
“Hi, my daughter is here. Monroe Shaw.”
She scans something on the computer screen and nods. “Here’s a pass.” She hands me a sticker to affix to my shirt.
“He needs one, too.” I toss a thumb at Jameson.
She gives a forced smile. “Sorry, only two people at a time with a patient.” She points to the sign that’s practically right in front of my face.
I groan, opening my mouth to argue but Jameson grips my arm. “It’s okay. Go.”
“Room six,” she tells me, knowing what’s coming next.
I leave Jameson in the lobby and rush down the hall of glassed rooms and stop outside of six.
“Daddy, it’s so cool. It’s pink. Can I put stickers on it? Can you sign it? Should I have mom sign it? What about my friends?”
Shaking my head, I slide the door open the rest of the way and step around the curtain. Monroe sits on the end of the bed with a pink cast wrapped around her left arm.
“Mom! You’re here!” She jumps off and rushes over to hug my legs. “Look how cool this is!” She holds up her cast like it’s a trophy.
“Are you okay?” Bending down, I wrap my arms around her small body, hugging her properly. She smells like coconuts and saltwater. Her familiar scent brings me a small level of comfort, but it doesn’t change the fact that she’s not whole. My little girl has a broken bone.
“I’m fine, Mom.” She rolls her eyes, stepping away from me. “I didn’t even cry, but Daddy did.” She gives a giggle, smiling up at Spencer.
“Stop ratting me out.” He gives a half-hearted smile and ruffles her blond hair.
“Are you ready to go?” I eye her freshly casted arm.
“We’re waiting for the discharge papers.” Standing up, Spencer’s eyes narrow on my neck.
I open my mouth to ask him what he’s staring at, but before I can say anything realization comes over me. Blushing, I tug my shirt over to hide the discoloration from the bite Jameson gave me.
“Why didn’t you answer the phone when I called?” It’s a question, but the way he’s looking at me I think he already knows.
“Sleeping. It was a long night.”
“Hmm.” His jaw clenches and a look of pain contorts his face. “Great.” He looks away, his chest expanding with a sigh.
When Spencer first called and explained what happened, I felt angry that he’d let our daughter get hurt like this, but now I feel resigned more than anything, because I know this could’ve just as easily happened on my watch.
Pulling out the chair, I sit down while Monroe hops back up on the bed.
“The nurses keep asking for pictures with Daddy.” She giggles, her blue eyes swinging between the two of us.
“Sounds professional,” I gripe, stifling the urge to roll my eyes.
Spencer crosses his arms over his chest, leaning against the wall. “I told them no,” he mutters under his breath. “And to pay attention to her.” He flicks his fingers to Monroe. “Because that’s why we’re here.”
“I think it’s funny.” Roe gives a tiny shrug.
Spencer’s eyes slide to my neck again, his jaw pulsing in irritation, but he doesn’t say anything because he can’t. It’s none of his business and he knows it.
“I can’t help it when people recognize me.” His tone is defensive whether he means for it to be or not.
I pinch the bridge of my nose. The last thing I want to do is argue with him when Monroe has been injured and is in the fucking hospital.
“I know you can’t, but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s completely unprofessional especially when our daughter has been hurt. This was one of my fears, you know.”
A look of pain crosses his face; one I can’t understand or decipher.
“It really doesn’t hurt that bad, Mom. And this is super cool.” She holds up her casted arm. “I can’t wait to have people sign it and decorate it.”
I spare a smile for her. “I know you can’t.” I tuck a piece of hair behind her ear despite her trying to scoot away from my touch. Only six and she’s already trying to dodge me.
I’m sure by the time she gets home from school tomorrow that cast will be loaded with half of her school’s signatures.
Looking between her dad and me, she says, “Can we go now? I’m tired of this place.”
We both give a chuckle, exchanging a smile between us. “We’re still waiting on the doctor, princess.”
She turns her big blue eyes to me. “Who am I going with? You or Daddy?”
I hear a tiny sound of pain come from Spencer and give him a peculiar look. “Doesn’t matter to me, but it’s your dad’s day with you.”
“Who do you want to go with?” Spencer asks.
She looks down at her knobby knees, her fingers skating over the blankets at her side. Indecision is written all over her and I feel like I’ve been kicked in the gut.
Spencer and I might have a good relationship, but it doesn’t change the fact that we’re her parents and not together, which forces her to choose between us.
Speaking up for her, I say, “Why don’t you finish your day with your dad, and I’ll see you tonight like we’d already planned?”
Relief is evident on her face and in the slope of her shoulders. “Okay. Dad, can we get ice cream on the way home?”
He laughs, ruffling her hair. “Whatever you want, princess.”
His eyes flick to me and we exchange a look, one full of pain and regret for our daughter, because she’s going to spend her whole life having to choose between us and that’s not what either of us ever wanted for her, but when you’re not together that’s inevitable.
The door to her room opens and the curtain slides back a moment later, revealing the nurse. “I have the discharge papers here. I need your signature here and you’re good to go.”
She bats her eyes up at him, tucking a piece of scarlet hair behind her ear.
She’s completely oblivious to me standing beside my daughter, who as the patient, she should at least spare a glance to.
I try not to be too judgmental because maybe if I met my favorite celebrity I would fangirl too, but Spencer is just … Spencer to me.
He signs the sheet of paper and passes the clipboard back to her.
“Um.” Her cheeks pinken. “Some of the nurses and I were wondering if we could get a group photo with you?”
I bite my tongue to hold back a sassy retort I’d probably regret later.
Spencer’s eyes fall to me before he answers her, pain etched clearly into the lines of his face because he knows how much I disapprove of this, but he’s a nice guy and we both know he isn’t going to tell her no now.
His eyes implore me to understand as he opens his mouth and utters, “Sure, not a problem.”
I look away, not wanting him to see the anger on my face, but I know he’s aware of it anyway. It infuriates me that because of the path he’s taken in life we can’t even take our daughter to the hospital without someone recognizing him and wanting something from him.
Stuffing down my feelings, I turn to Monroe. Her legs swing back and forth as they dangle off the edge of the bed. The bright pink cast wrapped around her small arm nearly blinds me with its brightness and its clear reminder of our failure as parents to protect her from everything.
Even ourselves.
“I’m going to go.” I hope she can’t hear the quiver in my voice and how I’m barely holding myself together for reasons unknown to me—or at least reasons I prefer to think don’t exist. “I’ll see you tonight.”
“Okay.” She smiles up at me, her innocent mind completely unaware of the storm of thoughts brewing in my mind. She holds her arms up for a hug and I’m more than happy to oblige.
I squeeze her tight and kiss the top of her head before letting go.
“See you later, Mom.”
I stop at the doorway and look back at her, marveling at how grown up she already is. “I love you.”
“Don’t get all mushy on me. It’s gross.”
“Monroe.”
She giggles and rolls her eyes playfully. “I love you, too.”
In the hall, it’s impossible to spot Spencer in the sea of nurses and other medical personnel trying to get a photo with him. Still, I swear I feel his eyes following me as I walk down the hall back to the waiting area where I hand in my badge.
Jameson immediately stands up from the seat he was lingering in and pushes his dark hair back from his eyes. “How is she? Is she okay? Do I need to bring the car around for her?”
I shake my head. “She’s going to stay with her dad until tonight, but she’s fine. She thinks it’s cool. I’m sure she’ll make you sign her cast and draw something for her.”
Jameson doesn’t draw often anymore, but he’s good, really good. I once found his high school portfolio stuck in the back of his closet. I asked him why he’d never pursued art, but he said it was just a hobby for him, and he loved numbers and computers more. Weirdo. But my weirdo.
“You ready to go then?” He arches a brow in wait for my reply.
I nod, my stomach heavy at the fact my daughter is hurt and I have to leave her behind. But I know she’s in good hands with Spencer.
Jameson wraps his arm around me as we head for the exit. “Ice cream?”
I laugh because he knows me so well. “Absolutely, and coffee too.”
He grins down at me. “I would never forget your coffee.”