18. Chloe
“ L ook at McCall strut his stuff.” Gabe leaned against the door jamb of the engine bay, arms crossed, a huge grin on his face as he watched Travis walk Judah through the most extensive pumper tour a five-year-old ever got at the Fernandina Beach Fire Department. “You’d think he was Chief instead of just off his probation year.”
Chloe laughed and shared a look with Rose, who stood next to her husband, watching Travis and Judah with the same interest and amusement. “I’m so glad I stopped by to see this,” she said. “Is Chief Keating around today?”
“Oh, he’s here. So’s Hutch, who believes it’s the Captain’s job to personally soak the little guests with a fire hose.”
“No!” Chloe said, narrowing her eyes at her brother-in-law. “You will not soak Judah with a fire hose! That’s dangerous.”
“Don’t worry, Mama Bear. It’s on the lowest setting. And so’s that siren he’s about to let Judah turn on.”
Chloe turned to the pumper truck, seeing Judah joyfully perched in the driver’s seat, his legs swinging with excitement, his eyes wide as he took in the array of dials and gadgets on the massive dashboard.
“Ready?” Travis asked him, leaning in with one hand protectively on the child’s back.
“I ready, Uncah Man!” he called out about as loud as any siren.
“You sure?”
“I sure!” His sneakers fluttered wildly.
“Flip that switch. Right there. On three. One…two…three!”
A siren screeched, not much louder than a noisy phone and not nearly enough to even get the attention of any of the firefighters milling about the station on a blessedly slow day.
Travis was off today, but Judah had wanted to see the station so much, they decided to make a trip here.
“You just going to let that slide?” Rose asked, stepping away from Gabe to whisper to Chloe.
“The siren?” she asked with a frown.
“The reference…Mama Bear?”
“Oh, yeah.” Chloe gave a laugh. “I didn’t even notice.”
“Because it’s a natural role for you, darling.” Rose tenderly slid a lock of Chloe’s hair behind her ear, giving her wise big-sister smile. “You three are like a family already.”
“Not exactly.” Chloe watched Travis hoist Judah out of the seat and let him scamper to the gear wall, holding his hand as he guided him to the hook that said “McCall.”
“That’s my name!” Judah announced loudly.
“Oh, he can read his name?” Rose asked. “That’s awesome for a kid who just turned five.”
“He knows every letter, can spell simple words, and can count to fifty.” Chloe beamed. “I know I sound like a proud mother, but the credit goes to his late parents, and I suppose Travis’s dad, though he’d never say that. I don’t think Pops was exactly evil—he taught Judah to say grace.”
“Is Travis still struggling with all that?” Rose asked.
“He doesn’t seem to be. Judah has become a person to him now, not a symbol of Dale’s shortcomings as Travis’s father.” She smiled as she watched Travis let Judah put on his jacket and stick a whole leg into his boot. “Wait, I have to get a picture of this,” she said, reaching into her purse.
But before she found her phone, she sensed Gabe standing a little straighter. Not exactly at attention, but she wasn’t surprised to see Chief Keating come into the bay.
“Who do we have here?” the silver-haired boss asked, bending over to look at Judah, swimming in the oversized jacket and boots.
Slipping her phone out, she took a few steps closer, a smile pulling at the adorable sight as she snapped pictures.
“Is this Firefighter McCall Junior?”
Judah looked up, eyes wide, silent.
“This is my nephew, Judah, sir,” Travis said, his voice rich with pride. “And I do think he’ll make a fine firefighter someday.”
“Then he’ll need this.” He brought a hand out from behind his back, and presented a small plastic firefighter helmet. “Do you want to wear it?”
Judah nodded enthusiastically, grinning while the Chief put the helmet on his curls, carefully placing it over the elastic band that held his glasses in place. Then Judah looked over to Chloe and practically danced on his toes, his joy arcing across the bay.
“Aww.” Rose cooed next to her.
“I know, right?” Chloe laughed while she snapped about a hundred shots.
Behind them, Gabe put a hand on Rose’s shoulder. “Don’t get any ideas just because your twin sister had two babies,” he joked to his wife. “Four and done for the D’Angelo family.”
She turned and smiled up at him. “No fears, Lieutenant. I’m done. But my baby sister here…”
“It’s not up to me,” Chloe said. “I’d give up everything for that kid. But Travis…”
“Give him time.” Gabe put his other hand on her shoulder. “He’s coming around, Chloe. We talk about it every day. He’s made major strides and just needs time to process and accept. Not you, obviously. The guy’s a goner for you, which I knew he would be when I set you two up.”
“Set us up?” Chloe threw him a look. “I ran into him on the street.”
“Yeah, but when he came into the station asking everyone about a girl named Chloe, I, uh, might have made sure you were at our house alone the night he needed to pick up some gear.”
“It’s true,” Rose said. “We made the match.”
Chloe grinned at both of them. “Well, thank you. You know how I feel about Travis. He’s…”
“He’s the one,” Rose said, dropping her head back to land on Gabe’s chest. “Just like my guy, here.”
Chloe groaned. “Nobody is as perfect as you two, or your four angelic children.”
“Families come in all shapes, sizes, and colors,” Gabe said. “And speaking of colors, I’m going to be the one to give that kid the fire station coloring book and crayons or he’s going to forget I’m here. And Uncah Gabe arranged the tour.”
They laughed as he disappeared, while Judah trotted closer with his new red helmet askew on his head.
“We’re going to play with the hoses!”
“And he’s going to get a little wet,” Travis said, right on his heels after he thanked the Chief for his kindness.
“Consider it a bath,” Rose said. “I can’t tell you how many nights my kids have been here for hose fun and we called them clean.”
“I have dry clothes in a bag for him,” Chloe said. “Go have fun. Travis, will you take pictures?”
“I’m on hose duty. And we don’t need pictures, we’ll get them next time we’re here.”
As they took off for the lawn outside in the back, Rose turned to her.
“Next time? See? I’m optimistic about this, Chloe.”
She let out a sigh and admitted the truth. “So am I. In fact, if this kid slips through our fingers, I don’t think I could stand it. But it’s not up to me, Rosie. Travis has to want it as much as I do.”
Rose put a hand on her shoulder and guided her toward another back door that led to a patio and a view of the grassy area. There, they could see Travis gently chasing, teasing, and soaking Judah, and then letting him hold the hose and do the same in return.
Their laughter—one deep and from a masculine chest, one like musical giggles from a wee body—echoed over the space and completely filled Chloe’s heart.
“I know what I want,” she whispered to her sister. “I just don’t know how to convince him to give it to me.”
“Don’t worry, Chloe. Judah’s doing the heavy lifting.”
Watching the uncle and nephew laugh with abandon, she had to believe that was true.
Long ago, Chloe realized she hated saying goodbye. But this one? Oh, she despised leaving Judah after a long day of fun.
This evening, they’d delayed the inevitable with a stop at Cracker Barrel, treating Judah to chicken fingers and Travis’s legendary “mashed taters.”
The meal filled the boy’s belly, but not his heart, which looked like it might be aching as Travis took the exit to Mandarin off the Interstate.
Storm clouds with a threat of tears filled his eyes as he recognized it was time to go back to the group home.
Just as she was about to say something cheery and optimistic, Chloe caught sight of the look in Travis’s eyes—just as stormy, just as foreboding, same tears on the horizon.
What was stopping him? The next step, according to Mae, was to take over guardianship, then they’d file paperwork that established the blood relation for a “kinship” adoption. All of it would be easy as pie. At least legally it would be.
Emotionally? She couldn’t say.
As she’d mentioned to Rose, Travis didn’t seem stuck on his issues about his father anymore. Sometime in these weeks—between ice cream cones and dirt-lifting toy trucks, after bath time and over late-night grilled cheese sandwiches, and, of course, today’s insanely fun tour of the fire station—Travis stopped mentioning the man who had broken his spirit as a child.
In fact, he more and more frequently referred to “Pops,” because they agreed it wasn’t fair to just let the man’s memory disappear for Judah, who’d now lost a mother, a father, and his beloved grandfather. But there were no more pained expressions on Travis’s face, no more anger over his late father’s shortcomings, no more resentment toward Judah.
But something still stopped him from going all in.
Travis turned and pulled into the group home, which looked even drearier than the first time they were here. Now they knew Kelly and Ron, the “home-keepers,” as they were called, were lovely but stretched to their limits.
Simple things—a manicured lawn, a neat garage, or a desperately needed fresh coat of paint—were ignored as the middle-aged Christian couple put their hearts and souls into making this temporary stop for so many boys as pleasant and safe as they could.
As far as Chloe was concerned, she had one goal, and that was to stop coming to this place and leaving Judah behind.
Before they were out of the car, the front door opened and they saw Kelly step out, pushing back hair that probably hadn’t seen comb or brush in hours. Next to her, and deep in conversation, was the now-familiar face of Mae, who’d become a lifeline for Chloe.
Stopping their discussion, the two women looked at Travis’s truck with a mix of expectation and worry in their expressions…and Chloe’s heart sank.
He’d been placed for adoption. It was bound to happen again, and soon.
She shook it off and turned a happy smile to the only person who mattered in the mix—the sweet angel whose glasses were crooked as he stared down at the red plastic helmet on his lap.
“There’s Miss Kelly,” Chloe said with a high-pitched voice of excitement. “You can tell her all about how you sat in a fire engine today, Judah!”
He gave a half-smile, which she interpreted as, “If Miss Kelly has time.”
“Oh, buddy,” Travis said on a heavy sigh as he pulled into the driveway. “Guess it’s time to say so long.”
Judah’s lower lip quivered and protruded, instantly making Chloe reach into the back seat to his booster chair. “But we’ll see you again soon. I promise! On Travis’s next day off from being a fireman!”
The lip just came out a little more.
Oh, yeah. The goodbyes were getting hard for everyone.
He looked down and gripped the helmet, then reached for the coloring book with a netted bag of crayons that “Uncah Gabe” had given him. As his fingers rubbed the gold firefighter seal on the cover, he shuddered, fighting tears.
Oh, good gracious, this was no way for a child to live!
“I’ll get your stuff, buddy,” Travis said, already out of his seatbelt and pushing open his door.
Chloe climbed out of the passenger side and waved to Mae and Kelly. Immediately, Mae beckoned her closer. While Travis got Judah, Chloe walked over, noticing that neither one of them looked happy and with each step, her heart dropped, expecting the worst.
“Wait until you hear about the day he had,” Chloe said first, hoping to delay the bad news. “The personal one-on-one fire station tour—”
“He’s going to be leaving here,” Mae said quickly and softly.
She knew it. On a sigh, she nodded. “He was placed for adoption.”
“Actually, no, not yet,” Mae replied.
“Oh, really?” And back her heart went chugging up the Judah rollercoaster. “But…where…”
Kelly’s shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry, Chloe. We’d love to keep him but Ron and I have got to thin down the population at this home,” she said, glancing at Mae to give the impression they’d just been talking about this. “My husband and I love helping the ‘in-betweeners’ as we call them—the kids who are on the cusp of a new life but fresh out of their old one. It’s a challenge, but it’s a blessing, too, as I’m sure you understand.”
Chloe nodded, but she didn’t understand a thing. What did they mean he was leaving?
“Judah is the last boy I want to let go,” she continued. “He’s a good, good child. But we’ve got three teenagers at the moment and desperately need the space.”
“There’s another home that can take Judah,” Mae said.
“Oh, okay.” Did they hear the total relief in Chloe’s voice? There was still a chance for them. If only Travis…
She glanced over her shoulder to see what was taking him so long and caught sight of Travis crouched down, his hands on Judah’s shoulders, clearly calming the little boy down. Time was all they needed—she was certain of that.
“Then we can see him at the new home,” she said.
Mae and Kelly shared a look that spoke volumes, but nothing Chloe could decipher.
“We can’t?” she asked.
“It’s not in Jacksonville,” Mae said. “But it will be in Florida, of course.”
Which was a massive state. “Where?”
“Near Fort Myers Beach and it’s so pretty—”
“The west coast? And that far south?” Southwest Florida was a good six-hour drive from Amelia Island. They’d never see Judah! “When is he going?”
Mae made an apologetic face. “I’ll be driving him down in a couple of days.”
A couple of days ?
“But it’s a good home,” Kelly said, reaching out her arm because Chloe was probably doing a terrible job of hiding her feelings. “I know the people and they’re terrific. Plus, I promise you he’ll be adopted in no time. The babies and toddlers go first, but Judah is special.”
Chloe swallowed against a growing lump in her throat. “I know. He is. He’s…”
“Hey, Judah!” Kelly interrupted her by bending over and smiling at the little guy who shuffled over to them. “Is that a fireman’s hat you’re wearing? You look like you could climb a ladder and put out the blazes!”
He offered a half-hearted smile, then took off the hat and turned to Travis, arms up. “Ride, Uncah Man?”
“Aw, bud, we can’t do a piggyback now. You’ll get all sweaty and you had a hose bath! Wait until you tell everyone about that.” He held out the small bag that contained Judah’s change of clothes to Kelly. “Probably not officially clean, but…”
“Clean enough for a woman with seven kids in one bathroom,” she said, taking the bag. “Did you get dinner, Judah?”
“Oh, he visited his first Cracker Barrel,” Travis announced proudly. “Chicken fingers until he bawked!” He imitated the bawking chicken, complete with flapping wings, but the stunt didn’t get the cascade of giggles it had while they’d been in the restaurant off the highway.
“Come on, now, Judah,” Kelly said, reaching for his hand. “I bet Mr. Ronald would like to hear about your trip to the fire station. We have a lot to do to get the house ready for lights out, so say goodbye to your friends.”
Friends ? Was that what they were to him? The thought sucker-punched Chloe.
Judah hung his head from one side to the other. “Bye,” he whispered.
Travis put out both hands for a double high-five, their standard way of saying hello and goodbye, but Chloe had to reach down and squeeze his little body with love. She added a kiss on his cheek, which was probably against some dumb foster kid rule, but she didn’t know when she’d see him again.
And he didn’t even know he was leaving, which would destroy him.
Still holding him, she looked up at Mae, who gave an infinitesimal shake of her head, which Chloe interpreted as an instruction not to say anything just yet. She’d let Kelly break the news, and wipe the ensuing tears.
“Bye,” Judah repeated, patting her back like he was the one giving comfort.
She straightened slowly and backed away with another wave, watching Kelly take him inside.
They stood with Mae, and Chloe waited for her to tell Travis the news but she just took a deep, slow inhale, silent.
“He’s being moved to another home in Fort Myers,” Chloe finally said softly. “Sometime this week.”
Travis’s jaw loosened as he blinked and processed that.
“So, we may not see him for a while,” she added. “Or you, Mae. Thank you for all you’ve done for us and for Judah.”
The woman nodded, clearly emotional. “Judah loves you two. You’d make great—”
Travis held his hand up to stop her. “Wait. Wait. What ? He’s moving?”
“This house is jammed and Kelly is ready to break, so we’ve done some shuffling and we’re moving him,” Mae said. “There’s nothing we can do unless he gets an adoption placement or a foster family opens up.”
For a long moment, Travis just stared at her, his face growing pale and the small vein in his neck throbbing.
“We need to go,” he said gruffly, reaching for Chloe. “Right now.”
A little stunned by that, she leaned in and gave Mae a quick hug. “We’ll be in touch,” Chloe promised, and let Travis hustle her back to the truck.
She climbed in the passenger side, waiting as he settled behind the wheel, staring ahead, his Adam’s apple rising and falling like he was fighting the same sob threatening to come out of her.
“One caveat,” he said.
She shook her head. “Excuse me?”
“I have one simple requirement before we go in there and declare that kid is ours. Foster, adoption, forever, whatever. One condition.”
And it didn’t matter a lick what it was. “Yes,” she rasped, her eyes stinging with hope and the sense that they were truly turning a corner.
He turned to her. “I haven’t told you what it is.”
“I don’t care, Travis. I don’t care if I have to fly to the moon and bring back a rock. I don’t care if I have to run through Times Square naked. I don’t care if we have to move, change, empty our bank accounts, or stand on our heads. I don’t care! I love that child and I want to—”
“Marry me.”
She gasped.
“We can’t raise him separately. We have to be his parents, a unit, a family. I won’t let history repeat itself with single parents and…instability. I want to be the father to Judah that mine wasn’t to me and there is no way in heaven or hell I can do that without you, so we have to get…Chloe?” He lifted his hand, swiping a tear she didn’t know had fallen.
“You heard me,” she said in a hushed whisper. “Yes.”
His face lit up as he threw his arms around her and pulled her closer and both of them let go of the tears they’d been holding in since…well, since the moment they met the boy who would become their son.