Chapter 10
ten
. . .
HONOR
“Want to get a drink?” Blake asked and I glanced up from my book.
Blake had delivered on his promise to get us an afternoon off from wedding party activities to spend some downtime just the two of us. It had come a few days later than expected, but after so many days of group fun, it was nice to slow down and unwind for a few hours.
I squinted at the other end of the pool deck where the bar was packed with guests.
“But the bar is so busy. And so far. And so hot,” I whined, all but pouting at Blake.
He chuckled and I just about fell off my chair.
“Excuse me, was that a laugh?” I tossed my book on the table between our sun loungers. Blake had booked us a semi-private cabana for our day poolside so we could stay out of the heat. A small apartment was a better name for it. There was a double day bed at the back, cushioned bench seats lining the three walls and two separate loungers in the middle, one of which I was currently laid out on like the queen I was.
“I laugh,” Blake said with a frown.
He looked just as drool-worthy today, opting for red shorts instead of blue, like something straight off the set of Baywatch with his sculpted abs and perfect shoulders. Spending the day with him by the pool really wasn’t helping with the crush I was clearly developing.
But it wasn’t my fault he was so damn hot. I had eyes. Ones I evidently couldn’t tear away from him for more than ten seconds, which was why I’d tried to bury my head in my book.
It hadn’t worked.
I’d read the same sentence nine times while trying not to glance over at him.
“I’ve heard you laugh, like, twice ever,” I said, picking up the sunscreen to rub some into my shoulders.
“That’s because I only laugh when something is really funny. Maybe you should get better jokes.”
I dropped the sunscreen to the lounger and pushed to my feet. “I’m sorry, did you just make another joke?” I glanced around the cabana. “Who are you and what have you done with Blake? Is this some kind of body snatching thing?”
He chuckled and the sound nearly knocked me off my feet.
“Wow, don’t do that again.”
“Do what?”
“Laugh like that. I think I just got knocked up.”
He shook his head, clearly amused, which meant I was slowly but surely wearing him down. Down to what, I didn't know.
What the hell was my end-game here? Tanking my professional reputation by hooking up with a client for one steamy vacation romp that would end the moment we boarded the plane home? It wouldn’t be worth it, no matter how hot the sex might be with a guy like Blake.
If only I could get that message through to all the parts of me that were lusting after him.
He tilted his head towards the pool. “Come with me, I want to show you something.”
I followed him out of the cabana, stopping at the edge of the pool as he waded in.
“Blake, I’ve seen the pool. We’ve been here for half the day already, I’ve been swimming in it twice while you answered emails on your phone.”
He gave me a flat look. “Would you just get in?”
I waded in, stopping in front of him. “Okay, now what?”
His hands landed on my shoulders, strong and warm, and turned me around, his arm coming over my shoulder to point to the far end of the enormous pool. My body lit up at the feel of his front brushing against my back.
“Is that a lazy river?” I asked over my shoulder, startling when I realized how close our faces were.
He glanced down at me and didn’t move away. If I leaned in even the slightest amount my lips would brush his. Whatever I was feeling right now went against everything I stood for in this job, and yet I couldn’t stop myself from wanting it just a little.
His hand landed on my hip under water, sending a spark of desire through me. We were partially naked, in water, with our bodies pressed together. I wanted to spin around and throw myself against him so badly.
Put your lust away, you desperate horn dog.
“So do you want to?” he asked, his voice low and deep.
I stared at his perfect mouth.
“Do I want to what?”
Get naked with you and have hot pool sex without anyone seeing us? Yes.
“Go floating with me.”
Oh. That.
Tearing my eyes away from his mouth and biting my lip, I nodded. His fingers slid off my hip as he moved around me, the loss of contact instantly deflating.
We waded to the far end of the pool and grabbed two of the white floating rings stacked at the edge, before slipping into the current. We floated lazily along, the lush green gardens of the resort moving past us.
“So where does this go? Will it dump us out in the ocean at the end to be eaten by sharks?”
He smiled. “Not quite.”
We floated on in silence for a moment.
“How did you end up working as a…” he stopped, clearly trying to work out what to politely label my profession.
“A companion for hire?” I offered.
“Is that the term for it?”
I shrugged. “I mean… it doesn’t really matter what I call it. People will always think I mean escort anyway.”
A lot of men didn’t care to ask about the technicalities of my job when they found out. They just wanted to know if they could pay me to sleep with them or not.
“But you don’t…” Blake started, stopping before actually asking.
I snorted a laugh at his awkwardness. It was so out of character for him. Sure, I hadn’t known him for long, but in everything I’d seen from him he was usually so confident and self-assured. Sometimes arrogantly so, like the day we met in the airport lounge.
“No, I don’t sleep with men for money,” I said, lightly splashing him. “My clients hire me for different reasons. To accompany them to events, to boost their egos by having a pretty woman on their arm. Or sometimes it’s just about company. As you’d know, high-powered men don’t have a lot of free time, which means they don’t really have the patience for pretense or games. With this, there’s no wooing, no need to take an interest in anything about me if they don’t want to. They get my undivided attention and guaranteed company, even if it’s just for a night or a week or a month.”
Blake studied me. “Have you ever wanted to sleep with any of them?”
What was the point in lying? Especially when I wanted to sleep with him and had wanted it since I first saw him.
“Yes.”
His brown eyes were locked on mine as we floated along, and I could see his mind at work. He wanted to know if I ever had, but didn’t want to offend me by asking.
“I’ve only ever crossed that line once,” I offered quietly.
My college best friend was the only person I’d ever talked to about it. “I was young and in college. I was new to the business, and I didn’t understand the repercussions of sleeping with a client. It was totally consensual, and no money was involved, but it made things messy. Once you sleep with someone it becomes hard for them to pay you for a date after that, because why not just date for real if you’re that attracted to each other?” I skimmed a hand through the water as we floated on. “But how do you date someone who dates other men for a living? It’s hard to maintain a normal relationship in this job. It would never work with someone who was the jealous type, that’s for sure.”
Blake nodded like he understood, and I was surprised at the lack of judgment in his expression. I’d hidden the fact that I owned my company from him when we’d first met because I’d judged him as the type most likely to judge me . But maybe I’d been wrong.
I keep talking to fill the void.
“If someone did book another date after we slept together, was I then expected to sleep with them every time because I’d already done it once? Too many lines get blurred and suddenly it’s impossible to see things clearly. I didn’t like the way it made me feel and it was just never what I wanted this job to be for me. I’m happy being a pretty thing on a rich man’s arm, but nothing more than that.”
His gaze locked with mine. “You’re so much more than a pretty thing on a man’s arm and you know it.”
I tried to cover the flush in my cheeks at the compliment because it wasn’t the reaction I’d expected from him. The more I got to know Blake, the more he showed me what a great heart he had. Yes, he was practically married to his career, but what highly successful person wasn’t?
And the more time we spent here, the more I witnessed the love he had for his parents, and the connection he had to Hudson and Spencer and Kelly was so evident. He cared about people; he cared about good people, and they cared about him.
The river slowed, opening into a deep pool with a hut running alongside it, and I was grateful for it, because it put an end to a conversation that was far too tempting. One that was making me question all the preconceived ideas I’d had about Blake.
I didn’t need any more reasons to like him. I was already more attracted to him than I was allowed to be, and if I let myself discover that he was a genuine guy beneath it all, I’d likely find myself falling in a way that could ruin everything.
“We’ve made it to the bar for that drink,” Blake said, taking my hand as our feet brushed the bottom of the pool, and we stood. The hut was set into the side of the pool, with stools in the water attached to the floor so we could sit and enjoy our drinks without getting out. We left our floating rings on the stack on the side of the pool and took a seat, our bottom halves still submerged in the water.
“What can I get for you?” one of the bartenders asked with a smile.
We ordered frozen margaritas complete with curly cocktail straws and mini umbrellas.
“Here’s to a solid day,” Blake said, raising his glass in my direction.
“A solid day? Wow, don’t flatter me too hard with how much you’re enjoying my presence,” I teased, knocking my glass with his.
Our gazes locked, the intensity burning there making me want to squirm in my seat.
“There’s never been a time on this trip that I haven’t enjoyed your presence.” He took a sip of his margarita, eyes never leaving mine.
Heat rushed my cheeks, and I bit my lip, averting my eyes and taking a sip of my own drink to cool myself down. The fact that was even required when I was still half submerged in a swimming pool proved how much he affected me.
“Not even when I’m making up ridiculous nicknames just to irritate you?”
A smile twitched at the corner of his mouth, and he shook his head once. “Not even then.”
A happy silence filled the space between us, each of us sipping our drink as we watched the other. This man was like a Rubik’s cube I was trying to solve while blindfolded. It was unlikely it was ever going to happen, but I could have fun trying for a while.
“So,” Blake said, picking up our conversation from the lazy river. “How did you get into the companion industry? Sounds like there has to be a story there.”
Not much of one, given it involved my fractured relationship with my parents. “I wanted to study creative arts at college.”
He frowned, clearly confused. “And in order to get in you had to let someone pay you to go on a date with them? Make that make sense for me.”
I laughed and shook my head. “My parents were totally against it. My father especially. They refused to pay for a degree they didn’t believe I could turn into a viable career. Said they wouldn’t allow a daughter of theirs to become a vagabond artist living in squalor.” I leaned closer like I was revealing a secret. “There’s nothing worse than poor people in my parents’ eyes.”
Blake studied me carefully, the scrutiny making me fidgety again. “I have friends who are writers and artists and all of them are wildly successful.”
I grinned back at him, knowing I’d caught him out. “Says the man who told me his family would never believe he’d willingly date a creative-type?”
He coughed on the sip he’d just taken, pulling a laugh out of me.
“I was an asshole. I shouldn’t have said that.”
My eyes widened. “Wow, did it hurt you to admit that?”
He rolled his eyes skyward. “We’d just met. I was trying to set professional boundaries between us. If you thought I was an asshole, it was easier for both of us to keep our distance.”
I bit my lip, trying not to smile. “Boundaries, huh? How’s that working out given we’ve been on top of each other covered in mud?”
He lifted his drink to his lips, pausing to give me a teasing grin that could melt the bathing suit right off me. Somebody needed to paint that expression and hang it in a gallery. He’d put the Mona Lisa out of business.
“Not well.” He took a sip of his drink, another charged silence hanging between us.
He gave me a rueful smile. “I’m sorry for the things I said when we first met. I’ve changed since then.”
I quirked an amused brow. “Really? And what brought on such a big change?”
His eyes locked with mine again. “You.”
More heat-fueled silence.
Blake cleared his throat. “So how did your parents take your creative ambitions?”
I sighed. “I tried to explain the merits of the arts to my parents, but they didn’t have a lot of respect for the opinions of an eighteen-year-old. So I told them to shove their money, I’d pay my own way. I enrolled in poetry classes a few months later.”
“Used those exact words, did you?” Blake asked teasingly.
“Definitely not, I never would have been brave enough to say that to my father’s face, especially back then, but the story sounds better that way.”
He laughed and I could get high off the sound. “That doesn’t get us to how you became a companion-for-hire though.”
I shifted in my seat, the water rippling around my waist. “Oh right, well, turns out college is really expensive.”
Another laugh from him. I was on a roll today.
“I had student loans coming out of my ears and needed to make some extra money once I was basically disowned, so I…”
This was the perfect moment to tell him that I owned the company he’d hired me through. Or that I hadn’t been out on an actual companion job in years now that the company had taken off the way it had.
But something held me back. Maybe it was my own insecurities and hurt from my past that had me clinging to my secret. My asshole of a father had really done a number on me the day he’d labeled me a “whore” and stormed out. Now it felt like no matter what I did, no matter how successful I became, I’d never be good enough or respectable enough.
Good enough at my degree.
Good enough with my business.
Good enough to prove my father wrong.
Good enough to stand beside someone like Blake, without pretending.
I didn’t need to unload all my insecurities and hangups on the sexy billionaire all at once. That was just about guaranteed to kill the tentative friendship that was forming between us.
And the fact I owned the company only made whatever I had started to feel for him so much worse. My professional reputation was at stake. I couldn’t throw it all away for him.
“So I joined the companion industry,” I finished. I took a hasty sip, hating the lie but telling it anyway.
“Well, you excel at it.” Blake raised his glass in my direction, downing the rest of his drink. “You’ve been amazing this whole trip.”
I blushed at the compliment, running a finger along the rim of my glass. “Thank you, I appreciate that.”
And I did.
Because Blake didn’t know that his specific requests had stumped both me and my talent coordinator. Or that his demanding attitude had scared off half the women who worked for me, and brought me out of retirement in order to meet his needs.
I’d believed at the time that I was taking one for the team. Yet sitting here under the Antigua sun, sipping cocktails and staring into the eyes of this gorgeous man who wasn’t at all put off by my job or creative ambitions, I realized that maybe the universe had done me a solid.
Maybe Blake and I were meant to be friends so I could learn that not everyone who came from my parents’ world was going to judge me harshly or reject me in an instant.
“What about you? How did you get your start?” I crossed my legs, turning fully to face him.
“The usual boring story. Harvard Business School. Bought my first property at twenty and expanded from there.”
I tucked my lips between my teeth to stop myself from laughing. “Would we say buying a property at twenty is ‘the usual’?”
Blake blinked. “Yes.”
I laughed. “Maybe in your world.”
He shrugged.
“Did you always want to be a property mogul?”
The hint of a smile played at the corner of his mouth again. “Not sure I’d describe myself that way, but no I didn't always want to be in property development.” He gave me a wry smile. “When I was younger… I wanted to be a dinosaur.”
A laugh burst out of me. “Wow… a dinosaur? What stopped you?”
“I’m a vegetarian.” He lifted his drink to his lips, giving me a wry smile. “Not really.”
Another laugh burst out of me, Blake’s eyes raking over me as I did.
I sobered under his gaze, stirring my drink with my straw to give me something to do with my hands.
“Well, you’re clearly successful and it’s not hard to see why,” I said.
That hint of a smile from him again. “Is that so?”
I shrugged, feeling anything but casual given the way he was looking at me. Or the way we’d been looking at each other since we sat down. The margaritas certainly weren’t helping the situation. I was always more frisky when tequila was involved.
“You’re ambitious and passionate.” I gave him a sideways glance. “I can imagine you’d be formidable in a boardroom.”
He shifted slightly, his knee brushing mine under the water, sending a shiver over me. It wasn’t the only room he’d be formidable in. Just from the way he walked, and held himself, or the confident way he put his arm around me at dinner or placed a hand on my back to guide me into a room, it was clear that he’d be amazing in bed.
Confidence was sexy. And Blake had it coming off him like smelling salts for horny women everywhere.
The bartender appeared on the other side of the bar in front of us. “Another round?”
Blake glanced my way, but I shook my head.
He stood tall, offering me his hand. “Should we float back?”
I accepted his hand, sliding from my seat. “Let’s do it.”
We grabbed our rings and slipped back into the flowing water to head to the main pool.
The water flowed fast around us and, a little clumsy from our cocktails, Blake and I kept bumping into each other. The third time it happened, he grabbed onto my ring, towing me closer. Our inflatables bounced together, sending me floating away from him and pulling a laugh from me. We couldn’t get close to each other right now, even if we wanted to.
The universe was definitely looking out for me.
Splashing and laughing, we made it to the end of the floating river where it dumped us around the back of the main pool overlooking the beach.
Discarding the rings, we waded to the infinity edge, propping our arms along the wall and taking in the view.
“God, I could live here year-round,” I said with a sigh, more relaxed than I’d been maybe ever.
“You’d get bored,” Blake said matter-of-factly.
“No, you’d get bored.” I nudged him with my hip under the water. “Don’t underestimate my ability to rot on a sun lounger with a good book. I’d be spending my days walking on the beach, reading, and drinking cocktails.”
Blake nodded with utter confidence. “And after three weeks of that, you’d be bored.”
Outraged at the implication that I was a workaholic just like him, I went to nudge him again with my hip. He predicted the move, his fingers closing over my waist, stilling me.
We fell silent, his gaze dropping to my mouth.
Kiss me, I want you to.
The thought was already running through my mind before I could stop it. It was my slightly buzzed brain talking, not my rational mind. But even without a daytime drink, I wanted it. There was so much more to him than I’d realized when we first met. Under all that stoicism and the surly billionaire bravado, he was genuine and loyal. Funny, even.
And hot as all hell.
I wanted to know what his mouth would feel like on mine.
Blake’s gaze dropped to my mouth, mesmerized for a moment. Then he blinked, pulling away, his fingers sliding off my waist under the water to leave me floating on my own once more.
I inwardly chastised myself. How many times did I need to be reminded that he was a client . I shouldn’t be silently begging him to cross a line that was impossible to come back from.
“We should get back to the room and get ready for dinner with my family,” Blake said, frowning down at me.
I nodded and together we waded towards the pool steps. Climbing out, we headed for the cabana, gathering up our sunglasses and room key from the lockbox.
I bit the inside of my cheek. Things had shifted between us since the bar, and it was making everything so much more complicated. If we’d kissed, I’d know exactly how to play it. Instead, we were left with an awkward kind of tension hanging over us.
“Thank you for today. I loved it. The river and the bar and the view, it was amazing,” I said as he held the gauzy curtain of the cabana open for me to walk through.
He stared down at me, his proximity making my stomach somersault in a way I didn’t consent to.
“What about the company?” he asked.
I smiled up at him, surprised he even had to ask.
“The company was the best part.”