Chapter Nine
I START PACKING AS soon as I get home. I know I’m being irrational and impulsive, but I just need...I just need to go somewhere that won’t remind me of him. My tears start falling as I struggle with the zipper of my beaten-up luggage, and the moment they do, they just won’t stop.
Jolie gives me a call, and I answer it, but all I end up is blubbering out words that even I myself don’t understand. All I want is to just get away. And beg for God to help me forget him. For good.
But instead, someone starts knocking on my door just when I finally manage to zip my luggage close.
“Thea?”
My heart stops.
Please, God.
Let that be my imagination.
Please.
“I know you’re in there.”
But it’s not, and my tears start falling faster at the roughness of his tone.
“I know you’re in there. Your car is outside."
I'm frozen. Hand halfway to my mouth. Breath caught in my throat.
"Please. Open the door."
I can't move. Can't think. Can't do anything except stare at the door like it might explode.
“I know my actions have made you think that I’m ignoring you.” His voice is different now. Stripped. Raw. Like the mask is completely gone and this is just him. Just Santino. "Or worse that I’m ashamed of you.”
Because it’s true.
“But I’m not.”
Liar.
“You probably didn’t notice them earlier...but the reporters were right outside Gail’s, and I didn’t want them to know about us.”
Because he’s ashamed of me.
“Because I love you.”
A sob catches in my throat.
Why is he lying like this?
Why?
“I asked you for two weeks, but it turns out...I only needed to see you running out of the cafe, and I just knew what my decision should be. So please.” The hoarseness of his voice makes my heart hurt so bad. “Please open the door and let me explain.”
My mind begs me to play it safe, but instead I find myself walking shakily until my fingers are turning the knob, and as soon as the door opens—
I don’t even have time to catch my breath.
His arms wrap around me like chains, and he’s holding me so tightly that he makes me feel he’s about to drown the moment he lets go.
“If the press found out about you, and you chose not to be with me...it wouldn’t matter to them, Thea. They’d still make your life hell, and that’s what I wanted to avoid. And the reason why I needed time to think about my decision...”
He slowly steps back. And his hands are shaking noticeably as he cups my face and makes me look into his eyes.
“It’s because I know choosing to be with you is selfish on my part.
Life with someone like me isn’t going to be easy.
Even if I retire, I won’t stop being in the spotlight.
The press will still want to find ways to make headlines and they’ll try to tear you apart even if they can see for themselves you’re not like all the others.
You’re all that’s good in this world, and—”
I can’t help it any longer.
I throw myself back into his arms.
Because all of those words he’s saying only mean one thing, and it’s what making my own heart feel like it’s about to burst.
“Santino...”
His powerful body stiffens upon hearing me whisper his name, and I realize that a part of him is expecting me to turn him down.
“I know I could’ve explained things better,” he grits out. “But I’m not good at this, and I need you...I need you to give me another chance. I’m going to be better at this, so just—”
His words disappear as I stand on my toes so I can reach up and cover his mouth with mine.
I love you, too.
And I know he’s heard this because he’s suddenly kissing me back, kissing me more deeply and fiercely than ever, and his kiss...
It’s saying the same thing, too.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.