Kingston
Lucy is a really cute princess. She cracks me up as she twirls through the living room of her house, holding her Halloween basket and commanding Camden to pick up her toys because she’s the princess.
“Yeah. That’s not how this works,” Cam says, perched on the couch, his feet kicked out and resting on the coffee table.
His mom, Tracy, as she makes me call her instead of Ms. Prescott, comes into the room, dressed in a tavern t-shirt and tight jeans.
His mom is really pretty. Young, too young to have an eighteen-year-old, and tired from so many years of doing it all by herself, but she is pretty.
And really nice. “Hey, sweetie,” she greets me with a kiss on the cheek.
“Thank you for watching these two for me.”
She winks playfully as Camden climbs up off the couch. “Yeah, right. He’s the responsible one,” he jokes, and his mom laughs, grabbing his shoulders and planting a kiss on his forehead.
“Thank you, baby.” She turns to Lucy, her eyes sad. “I’m so sorry I can’t take you trick-or-treating tonight, sweetie.”
I hate the sadness in her eyes, the desperate longing. She’s a good mom. No one can say she isn’t. But she works a lot just to keep afloat. She misses out on so much because she has to. And it’s really not fair.
Lucy looks a little sad, but then she brightens up—tough kid that she is. “It’s okay, Mommy. Kingston and Camden are fun.”
Tracy puts on a brave smile too, running her finger over her daughter’s cheek sweetly. “I know, and you better save me some peanut butter cups.”
Lucy giggles. “Of course.”
Tracy moves back to Camden. “Do you need anything? Thank you for grabbing pizza.”
Camden waves that off, not at all bothered about springing for pizza for dinner tonight so she doesn’t have to cook. “It’s not a problem, Mom, and we’re good. We’re going to take her out and then come back here for a spooky-movie marathon.”
“No! Caamm . . .” Lucy looks horrified, shaking her head. “No scary movies.”
He laughs easily, ducking down to pick up his little princess and hold her up in the air. “Not for you. Kingston and I are going to watch some after your little butt is in bed.”
She squeals happily in the air before struggling and making him put her down. “Okay, fine. But not while I’m still awake. I’m little.” She says this so damn adorably that we all laugh.
“Sure thing, kiddo,” he says and then hugs his mom. Lucy and I do the same before we head out to walk around the neighborhoods, begging for candy.
Luce is super cute and knows how to work a crowd to earn extra candy at nearly every house, I swear. When we finally drag our tired asses back to their house, it’s nine o’clock and way past her bedtime, but she’s still pretty hopped-up on candy.
I catch Camden’s eyes several times as we try to get her to sleep by reading stories and talking about all the houses we hit tonight, and finally—fucking finally—she’s out. I mean, I love the kid, but I need some best-friend time.
We make popcorn and flop down on the couch, finding an old horror movie. But I can’t stop staring at him instead of the screen. “You’re staring.”
I am. “I know.”
He smiles easily and turns to look at me. “Didn’t you get enough last night?”
Sex with him—or fooling around since we haven’t had actual sex yet—or have we?
I don’t know. I’ll have to ask him at a different time.
We both come, that I know, so it feels like sex.
Anyway, it’s been amazing, but I keep finding I want more and more.
His touch. His kisses. Just plain him. We’ve always been close, but now that his secret is out, and there’s no barrier between us, it feels even better.
Like he’s the one and only person that I can trust, and vice versa.
I’ll carry his burdens, and he carries mine.
“I don’t think so,” I answer honestly. “I’m not sure I ever will. ”
He looks surprised, his mouth dropping open as worry crosses his face. “Of course you will. This is just,” he waves his hand between us flippantly, “gay practice and confidence building.” He keeps his voice down to a low whisper, but he’s dead serious.
I wasn’t talking about the sex—or kind of sex.
Although I don’t think I’ll ever tire of that either.
It’s him I’ll never get enough of. “Yeah, I know.” I shrug it off, even though my stomach clenches uncomfortably.
My chest does too. “But it’s still really fun while it lasts.
” I don’t like the way the word “lasts” feels on my tongue, leaving a dirty taste in my mouth.
I know school will end soon. I know he’ll likely move away and go to college. That I won’t see him every day, and it’s killing me.
He turns his whole body to look at me. “You okay?”
“It’s almost over,” I say honestly, letting sorrow drip from my words. He knows I don’t want it to be.
He sighs deeply and then brings a hand up to cup my cheek carefully. “School is almost over. We aren’t. We’re friends forever.”
It’s a lie though. I can feel it. Because what is he going to want with me when he escapes this town and I stay behind? He’ll be off, living this big life, and I’ll be here in this small town—happy, except for not having him.
“Yeah, I know, Cam.” I lie too, moving to lay my head on his shoulder as he settles back into the couch.
Suddenly, I’m not as horny as I was. Not wanting to get off or do anything but lie here with him in his dark living room, watching a movie.
Knowing he’s destined for so many great things.
That he’ll never be able to thrive here or freely be who he really is.
That this town is truly his cage, when it’s my home.
I want to keep him forever, but I don’t know how.