Jameson
Winter break is over, and it’s the last semester of high school. I walk through the hallway, feeling a little nostalgic about that. Despite the way I feel about this town and even the school, I’m going to miss it.
All of it.
I know I don’t want high school to be over. Once it is, it’s a harsh reality I know I’m not ready to face yet.
I see Dixon, with his goofy-ass grin, but I veer to the other side of the hall, seeing Travis by his locker.
I head that way because I’m not sure I can keep my hands off Garrison if I go over there. Yeah, it’s getting that bad.
“Hey, Trav. Good break?”
His eyes meet mine, and I instantly know something is wrong. He has dark circles under his eyes and no hint of happiness there. “Not really.”
“What’s wrong?” My own smile drops, worried as hell about him.
“I didn’t get the scholarship.” His locker door slams, and I feel nothing but a dull ache in my gut for him. I know how damn bad he wanted that.
“I’m sorry.”
He just shakes his head, looking like he’s in a daze. “I’m never getting out of here, J. Never. That was my one hope.”
I place a hand on his shoulder, trying to look him in the eyes, but he avoids them. “Hey, it’ll be okay. You’ll get another scholarship. You’re so damn smart. There’s no way you aren’t going to college.”
He steps away from my hold, anger swirling in his eyes. “No. This was it. And I’m smart for Kensley but not the rest of the world.” That’s not true. His IQ alone says that’s a lie, but I know he’s hurting right now.
“Trav . . .”
“Don’t,” he says, his voice laced with agony. “I’m stuck. So damn stuck here. There’s nothing I can do.”
“Maybe your dad will—” I try to argue, but he cuts me off again.
“You know my dad. He won’t. He doesn’t understand college.
He doesn’t like it. He wants me to work hard for a living.
As if you can’t do that at an office job.
” I hear the disgust and disappointment he’s feeling, and I hate it.
He didn’t deserve this. He deserves to go to college and get out of this town.
He deserves his nerdy twink.
“I’m sorry.” It’s all I can say.
He just shakes his head solemnly. “It was my only hope.”
“That’s not true,” I say, wanting to comfort him but coming up short because I know how suffocating this town can be. I may not have applied to college or for any scholarships, but I still know.
I know the finality he’s feeling right now because I’m starting to feel it too.
“You know it is, just as much as I do. We’re both stuck here, J. And we always will be. I should have known better than to fucking dream.”
My chest hurts with the desperation to make him feel better, but there’s nothing I can do, and we both know it. He heads off to class, and then I feel Dixon behind me before he even speaks.
“No need to be jealous,” I say quietly, and I feel a soothing hand on my shoulder that makes me jolt alive but not pull away.
“Is he okay?”
I shake my head, not turning around to look at Dixon. I can’t right now. “No. He’s really not.”
“I’m sorry.” He sounds sincere. I used to think he was so shallow, maybe even a little bit dumb, but he’s neither of those things. When it comes to people, he’s good at picking up on cues.
Well, sometimes.
“Anything I can do?”
I shake my head slowly from side to side, but then stop and turn. “Make sure your window’s unlocked tonight.”
The slow grin taking over his face is so goddamn sexy, I want to risk it all and drag his ass into the bathroom right now. But I still have a little self-preservation left. “I can do that.”
“It’ll be late. I have to fix a fence tonight. Fucking goats broke it, and they’re in a temporary pen.”
“Sounds complicated. Need help?”
I snort at that because it’s not rocket science. It’s just fixing a damn fence. “I’ll definitely need help after. I’m sure I’ll be sore. Maybe even need a neck rub.”
He grins, and then when I realize that we’re in the middle of school with so many people around, I back up, my eyes widening. He must catch on because he clears his throat quickly, punching my shoulder and actually making me stumble. “Yeah. We’ll see about that, Bates.”
His cocky tone reinforces the farce that we were giving each other shit and not flirting with each other in the middle of school. “You’re on, Dixon,” I say loudly, and I hear a couple of chuckles as Oakley comes by, stealing Dixon away.
I hope no one sees it, but Dixon shoots me a wink that makes my heart flutter in my chest because it’s so full of promises.
Promises of tonight.
Because we don’t really have a future, but we have the night.