19. Resist
~ YILAN ~
“WHAT?”
Melek growled and pulled me hard against him, but his eyes were darting, searching, as if he sought answers and couldn’t find them.
What the fuck? What the actual fuck?
“Melek,” I said, grabbing his chin and making him look at me. “I am not doing anything with a fucking Fallen Angel!”
“I know,” he muttered, taking my hand from his chin and pulling it down, but not letting it go. “But clearly the Fallen wants to do something with you. And what other explanation is there?”
“I don’t know, but it’s not that.”
“They need women. To my knowledge they haven’t bred in thirty years or more. Gault was the last Fallen descendent that I know of.”
“But… they’d just take any woman they wanted, surely?”
Melek raised one brow again. “Would you let them?”
“No!”
“Then what makes you think—”
“I assume that some women want that, or… or are too weak to fight, or… I don’t know. But stop looking at me like I’d do that!”
“I’m not,” he growled. “I’m just… this is fucked up.”
“You’re telling me!”
Then he went still and his eyes cut to mine.
“What?” I breathed. “Melek, what— ”
“He’s not having you, Yilan.”
“That’s what I just said!”
“No, hear me,” he graveled, then he turned and raised his head, shouting to the room. “He’s not having you!”
His tension and distrust made me nervous, but my heart leaped because after listening carefully, obviously waiting to see if the Fallen would return, he looked down at me, and I could see the heat in his gaze—and feel it in the bond.
His hunger was back, his eyes blazing not just with rage, but with need. And even though I sensed that he struggled with it, I also could tell he wanted to lose.
I swallowed hard. “You’re mine , Melek. Only mine.”
He nodded, but still didn’t speak, looking around the room suspiciously again, his fingers tightening at my back.
“How do we fight him?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
“Resist,” he said immediately—then his eyes cut back to mine.
“How do we resist?”
“We… unite,” he said flatly.
The darkness in his tone made my heart sink. “That’s all I’ve wanted,” I said quickly. “That was my goal for this night—this day, Melek. I’ve put my whole Kingdom and crown aside to be here. Ordered them not to interrupt us, because… because I can’t stand being so far from you anymore.”
He inhaled sharply, but he didn’t relax, even when I put my hands on his chest.
“Melek. I don’t want him—or anyone else. At all. I want you. What can I do? How do I make you want me too?”
“I told you, the wanting has never been the problem. But the trust… God, Yilan. Half of me wants to bury myself inside you so deep you can’t walk, and the other wants to snap your neck.
” His tone was so tortured, and that fire in his eyes blazed higher…
I felt the bond respond, and I bit my lip and let my fingers trail into the hair at his nape.
Goosebumps rose on the back of his neck.
“If resistance is what you need…” I whispered, putting a hint of suggestion in my tone.
Melek growled, but reached for me again and I felt him leaning in. Wanting.
“I want resistance in your body, not your mind,” he growled. “This is… I am torn, Yilan. At war with myself over what I want with you.”
“Then let me fight with you,” I breathed. Then I took a risk and dropped one hand down to stroke him through the cotton of his shirt, almost weeping with relief and joy when I felt him stiffening. Neither of us moved. I held my breath, staring at him, pleading.
Then he exhaled heavily and clearly something in him snapped, because with a low groan he dropped his gaze to look down, reaching for the buttons at my leathers. He traced it with one finger first and I pressed into his touch.
Then, finally, he took the button between thumb and forefinger and flicked it open. Then the next one, his breath whooshing out of him as he did it.
His touch when he pushed my leathers open gave such a rush of goosebumps and sensation, that I sucked in audibly, my heart pounding when he got my buttons undone and slid his hands into the waistband, then down, sliding the pants down my legs.
I was so grateful we hadn’t found trousers big enough to fit him yet.
Unable to resist, I dropped one hand down to the thick steel of his thigh muscle, then dragged it up, under the hem of his sleep shirt, letting my fingers trail along that flat plain under his navel.
I swallowed. “My mother always told me that when I bonded it was important to… work through hard problems together.”
A low, warning rumble began in his chest, but he slid a hand down to cup my ass and pull me against him so I could feel his arousal against me.
“What else did she say?” he rasped.
I swallowed. “She said…never go to bed angry.”
He grunted. “Then the bed is out.”
My stomach dropped as he picked me up and whirled me around. In two strides he had me pressed back against the wall next to the window so hard I gasped. But now we were eye to eye and his thick, broad chest heaved, pinning me so tightly I could barely breathe.
I reached down for him, but he held me so snugly, there was no way to get to him. So I unbuttoned the top of my jacket instead, pulling the sides apart awkwardly because he gave me no room to move.
His eyes glowed in the dark as he dropped them to look at my bared breasts pressed against his chest, then he snapped his eyes back up and watched my face as he rolled his hips, rubbing himself against my stomach.
I yearned for him, but he was still fighting. So I kept my fingers curled into his hair and didn’t drop his gaze as he drew himself up and down against me.
Aching to have him inside me, I used both legs that were hooked around his waist to pull myself against him harder, rubbing myself on him, and chuckling breathlessly when his pupils dilated even further.
I thought he’d kiss me, but he nipped instead—my lip, my chin. A low, rumbling growl began in his broad chest, vibrating deliciously against my nipples.
Then one hand came up to grasp the back of my hair that I’d drawn up into a top knot, and he pulled my head back so my chin was high and I was forced to look down my nose to meet his gaze.
“I don’t know if I can be gentle, Yilan,” he said, his voice a dark husk.
“I don’t need you gentle, Melek. I just need you.”
His breath grew shorter. Louder. Then he groaned and dropped his head to latch onto my throat, mouth open, sucking.
I clapped a hand to his broad shoulders, gasping as he started rocking, his chest rubbing against mine, his tongue laving my throat… and his thick length sliding against me so hard it made me shudder, riding the cusp of pain.
I was helpless in his arms, pinned hard against the wall, head held back, and body trembling with need, while Melek’s groan became a growl.
Every inch of my skin pebbled, every sense screaming more, even as my heart feared he still might stop. But then he tilted his hips and almost took me, drawing over my core in a way that made my lungs stop.
He came off my neck with a rush of breath, but didn’t let me lift my head. Lifting his, instead, to stare down at me with those blazing eyes.
“Are you certain, Yilan? Certain that you want me? That you’ll take me forever—no matter how this shitshow might play out?”
“I’m certain,” I gasped, keeping my eyes on his even though they wanted to close with the pleasure he was already wringing from my flesh. “You’re my mate, Melek. My One.”
With a tormented howl, he let go of my hair, gripped the back of my neck with one hand, the back of my thigh with the other, tipped his hips and thrust into me, his entire, massive body shuddering.
My mouth dropped open and I stopped breathing as he filled me so fast and full, I felt him in the soles of my feet.