51. Just a Dream
~ YILAN ~
As Melek’s breathing slowed and evened out, I smiled and lay back, enjoying his weight pressing me into the mattress. But something about that conversation niggled at me.
I’d answered him honestly—I was afraid of his courage.
And I did have moments of sheer terror when it hit me what could come of what we were about to do.
But it was also true that I was eager to walk this road with him.
Only, I wanted to do it in lockstep. To fight the enemy, not my mate.
To give him his due for his strength and cunning, and to have him recognize mine.
Together we made an incredible team. My strengths enhancing his, and his mine.
I had the vision of how this might work if we both trusted each other implicitly…
but his words had echoed in a hollow place.
A spot in my mind and heart that suggested there was a hole in my vision.
In our vision. What were we not seeing? What piece of this journey hadn’t been identified?
There was a way through the darkness. I just needed a glimpse. ..
But it hovered out of sight, eluding me.
Like the word on the tip of my tongue that wouldn’t form, whatever lay at the back of my mind was frustratingly close. And yet, utterly out of sight.
As I sank closer and closer to sleep, I had no choice but to snuggle into Melek’s warmth and pray that God would reveal… whatever it was. Because I couldn’t see what I could not see .
And neither could my mate.
I just had to pray that one of us would catch sight of it over the other’s shoulder in time.
And with that thought I smiled.
Melek’s shoulders were wonderful…
I was back outside the Palace in the forest, staring up at the balcony outside my rooms, and that gap Melek had brutally forced into the steel frame.
I didn’t move, and wouldn’t until I was rested. I couldn’t remember how I knew, but I knew tonight of all nights it was imperative not to move without walking the shadows. So, I would stand here to breathe and recover, then I would begin the hunt again.
Hunt for what though? I couldn’t remember that either, and that made me frown.
When the man stepped out of a thicket just feet away, I pulled the darkness around me to shroud my presence. Even if he’d seen me, I would be invisible now.
He was tall. Even taller than Melek. And athletic—his shoulders as broad, though his frame was leaner.
A man made for speed. He walked with the casual grace that only came with that distinctly masculine strength and confidence.
Yet, his chin was down and he walked with his hands in his pockets, his eyes on his feet.
A posture I usually associated with a lack. A youthful self-consciousness.
I watched him approach, wondering who he was and why he was out here at this late hour.
Then he lifted his chin and my breath stopped.
He was fantastically handsome—a chiseled jaw, bright golden eyes gleaming with intelligence, lips that smiled easily. With his head up he was devastating.
And he was looking right at me.
Once again, something niggled in the back of my mind and my heart raced. I knew this man. Or I should. Yet, his name wouldn’t come.
When his gaze didn’t waver from my face, I checked myself to be certain that I was walking the shadows… and yet when I looked back, he was still smiling at me as if he saw me clearly.
He came to a stop just a couple paces away, his body relaxed, his hands buried in his pockets.
“Good evening, Yilan. ”
I blinked, wondering if it was a trick. If he just assumed I was standing here because he’d seen me when I wasn’t shrouded. But he met my eyes directly and…
“How do you see me?” I breathed.
He chuckled. “I see everything. You can’t walk the darkness out of my sight. The shadows are mine. And eyes are the windows to the soul. Even yours.”
My heart went cold.
But then he turned away and looked at the sky, squinting as if he examined the stars. “Things are changing, Yilan. Every choice narrows the options still left to you.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He dropped his chin and met my eyes again, his expression solemn this time. “Yes, you do.”
“No, I—”
“The potential for power in you is… breathtaking,” he said, his voice hushed for the first time.
His eyes bored into mine and it felt like he studied my soul.
“The strength that I could give you—and Melek—if you make the right choice is… quite stunning. This world is mine to do with as I please. And I am willing to make all of it yours. ”
I was struggling to breathe.
“Who are you? And what—”
“Come now, Yilan. You know who I am. At the very least you suspect. Melek named me the moment he saw me.”
I blinked as it all came rushing back—both of us in the tower and this man crouching in the windowsill that was magiked. He had no way to have simply appeared there, and shouldn’t have been able to enter even if he flew because the power should have thrown him back—
“Lucifer,” I breathed.
He gave a shallow but graceful bow and his smile returned. But he didn’t speak, staring at me instead as if he was waiting for more.
“Leave me. You’re not welcome here,” I said tightly. “I will not agree with you. I will not let you force me into anything.”
He huffed again, like I was a child. “One of the best lies your kind tell themselves,” he said, like it was a joke between us.
I frowned and he watched me, tilting his head, his eyes eager.
“Yilan, I cannot force you to do anything. Your choices are yours. It is why the tyrannical God you serve holds you responsible for them. Rest assured, I am not Him .”
“God isn’t—”
“Save your breath. I know that bastard far better than you do.”
I bristled and pushed away from the tree. “I’m not going to stand here and listen to this—”
“He hides everything from you, Yilan. Holding back, keeping it to Himself, waiting for you to stumble upon it. Did you know you had a mate? No. Or that he was an enemy? No .
“Were you aware that you’d have to kill a King to make your mate one? Also no.
“Did God reveal his soul to you? Of course not. Because your God is an oppressor. He knows knowledge is power, and so he withholds it from you.”
“That’s bullshit—”
“That purpose you’re chasing isn’t even your own.
You know that. So do I. You’d rather be a fighter and a spy than a Ruler.
But because your God made a decree, you are forced into corsets and arguing with men who can’t see what I see in you…
” His gaze grew intense and he leaned closer.
“You don’t have to live that life, Yilan.
That’s the deception. You were made for artifice and to walk the dark.
You were made to be an assassin and a thief, not a Queen. And I will make that real for you.”
My breath rushed out of me as the words he spoke touched something so deep in me I hadn’t ever let myself even think it. His smile grew.
“I can give you Melek. I can hand you the Nephilim without a fight. Think about that… no war.” He took a step closer, his gaze growing more avid. “I can give you safety, a healthy mate, and the most powerful offspring that has ever lived. You could single-handedly change the world for the better.”
“You lying fuck. Leave me alone .”
I turned, intending to storm away, but his voice stopped me cold.
“One more step and your watchers will find you here, alone, and unshrouded—you’ve let go of the shadows because you fear that I’m right, are you aware of that?
I have more power than you can even fathom, Yilan.
It’s mine to give. I’m already using it to protect you.
But one more step…” His voice had been cold with warning, but it softened when he spoke again—almost crooning.
“I know you. I know what you’re capable of—and how stupidly small the men in your life believe you to be. They’re wrong. I know that. ”
I was frozen, scared of taking another step and being found out, but terrified of the Fallen Angel behind me as well. Stuck. And hating that his words rang with truth.
“I will never follow you,” I snarled through my teeth, whirling to face him again. “I’ve seen what your power does to people. I’ve seen the evil of the Nephilim and—”
“All the Nephilim?” he asked casually, his brows rising slightly. I just stared. I wasn’t going to invoke Melek’s name. Not here. Not with him.
Then he sighed like he was sad. “As I said, time grows short. Your options narrow with every step you take. So… just remember my offer. I can fix this. Until you’ve passed the point of no return, if you change your mind, just call for me. I’ll be listening.”
“I will never call for you.”
He shrugged. “We’ll see.”
“No! No, there is nothing to see—you could never say or do anything that would tempt me to want you—”
“Just remember the offer,” he said with a small, patronizing smile. Like I was a child throwing a tantrum that he was choosing to ignore.
He turned away and when his eyes were off me, I slumped. But then he turned back.
“Just one thing I forgot: I am patient. But there will come a time when things grow urgent. At that point, I’ll be back for you or…”
I swallowed. “Or?”
He gave that awful smile again. “Well… you’re a strong and handsome woman.
I won’t deny that you’re my first choice.
But I have discovered that the Shadekin as a people are strong.
There are others here who would do as well.
And if you force me to choose one of them, I won’t have any reason to keep you safe any longer. ”
“You don’t protect me!” I snarled at him, sliding my hand into the sheath at my back.
Lucifer arched one brow. “You don’t have a clue all the things I’ve done for you, Queen of the Shadow Walkers,” he said darkly. “Who the fuck do you think made you?”
A flash of fear and pain jangled through my chest. Instinctively, I threw the knife—the serpentine flick that propelled a blade faster than an enemy’s eye could catch. But somehow, even faster, he was gone.
The blade whipped through the night air he’d inhabited a blink earlier and thunked harmlessly into a tree —
I sat bolt upright in bed, sucking at the air, panting, sweating, clapping a hand to Melek’s shoulder, who woke immediately and leaped to gather me in, his head whipping back and forth as he looked for the intruder.
“What is it? What’s wrong?” he demanded, pulling me higher on the bed with one arm to put himself between me and the unseen assailant as he threw the furs back with the other and prepared to leap from the bed.
But I grabbed for his shoulder and stopped him. “No, don’t leave me!” I gasped.
Melek’s head snapped back. He immediately gathered me into his chest, holding me to him, still looking around, then realizing that whatever had scared me wasn’t a physical threat.
“What is it? What happened? A dream?”
“We have to protect my people, Melek. My girls. My women—the Nephilim, the Fallen… they want them.”
Melek stared. “Istral?” he said hoarsely. “He’s after Istral?”
My blood ran cold, but I shook off the thought. “No, no, he spoke of… of strong people. Strong women.” Diadre. I swallowed hard. “He’s threatening my people so I’ll give in. We have to stand between them, Melek. We have to get control of this whole fucking continent and teach them to resist. Now!”