29. Traveling the Mind
twenty-nine
Traveling the Mind
*AZADEH*
M y body is still aching the next day, but fortunately, the oil and scented balm the innkeeper gave me helped me recover some. I’m feeling good enough to head out. The air is fresh and cold, but the sun is shining and it’s a beautiful day.
Flinn seems to think the same because he just looks at the sky and smiles. “We are having a lot of sunny days recently.”
“Isn’t that normal?” I ask.
“No, usually we have a lot of snowstorms around this time of the year,” he grins. “I’m not complaining, though. I love that it’s sunny.”
“You would love the Everlasting Desert, then,” I say.
“Maybe you brought the sun along with you?” Endellion says. It would have been a cheesy line if it weren’t for his gentle smile and the warmth in his eyes.
Flinn looks like he is about to roll his eyes and say something sassy, fortunately Caelan saves the day, appearing at the right moment. “Let’s go,” he says. “The innkeeper said the witch, Erin, is living at the edge of the pack. Apparently, she likes her privacy.”
“Can we trust her?” I ask.
“The pack members here do,” Caelan states with a frown. “Who knows? Hopefully Aylin isn’t playing us.”
“I wouldn’t put it past her,” Flinn chuckles.
“Aylin is loyal,” Endellion tells me. “But she does like her games.”
“Let’s see for ourselves then,” I suggest. Caelan nods and leads the way towards a cottage at the border of the pack. Unlike Aylin’s, it looks less fancy and a tad more old-fashioned. Pretty much like I would have imagined what a witch lives in.
Before we have even arrived at her door, an older woman opens it. “I have been expecting you,” she says with a smile.
I look at her thoughtfully. Her eyes and her nose remind me of… “You are related to Aylin?” I ask.
“You have sharp eyes, my child,” she chuckles. “Aylin is my niece. My name is Erin, and I’m happy to finally meet four of the six people who are supposed to change fate.”
Endellion rolls his eyes. “Games. I told you so.” I can feel how tentative and skeptical he is, and in a sudden burst of instinct, I reach out to touch his arm. He looks at me, surprised, but then smiles. He takes my hand with his, squeezing it slightly while he leads me inside. Caelan and Flinn follow us, and to my surprise, none of them utters a word. They just exchange a curious gaze but remain quiet.
Inside the cottage, Erin shuffles off to prepare tea for us. “You know the prophecy?” Flinn breaks the silence.
She nods. “It seems like you uncovered some truths,” she says. “I don’t want to know any details, though. It's better not to know too much if I’m not directly involved.”
“Can you help me open my mind?” I ask her when she returns with the tea. “For me to reach out to someone who visits me in my dreams?”
“You want more control over it?” Erin asks.
I nod. “At the moment, it’s just when I’m between sleeping and waking that they come to me, and our minds connect. I need to be able to reach out to them on my own.”
“We can do that,” she says. “But it means your mind will be more vulnerable.”
“What does that mean?” Endellion asks. “Will it hurt her?”
“No, but it means we are going to lower her walls, and there will be no protection anymore.” She pauses. “The mind is not a door you can just open and peek through. It’s much more complicated, and the princess has a strong mind. Lowering her walls will open more doors than just one for her.”
“It has to be done though,” I say before anyone else can argue with her. “I will need to learn how to put up my walls myself.”
“That’s the goal,” Erin says, sounding content. “And the right spirit. So, without further ado,” she turns to the guys. “You three have to leave.”
I almost snort into my tea at the expression on the triplets’ faces. Caelan looks like he is willing to put up a fight, Endellion like he wants to grab me and run, and Flinn like he wants to throw something at Erin.
Erin sighs. “She needs quiet to focus.”
“We will be quiet,” Caelan argues.
“No one can concentrate with three guys staring a hole into your head,” she deadpans, making me laugh.
“It’s alright. Aylin wouldn’t have sent us to Erin if she didn’t trust her,” I calm them.
“This will take us hours,” Erin says earnestly. “I want the princess to be able to stay focused without prying eyes. I’m sure you have business to attend to.”
I turn to look at Endellion. I’m fine. I form with my lips, hoping he will understand. Oh, how I wish I could mind link him. He smiles at me, sending butterflies through my belly.
“Alright,” he says, much to my surprise, and stands up. “If Azadeh agrees, then we’ll respect her decision.”
“But we don’t like it,” Caelan grumbles.
“Not at all!” Flinn agrees.
“We will talk to the alpha and discuss some issues with him,” Endellion says. “And then plan our sightseeing trip.”
His last words seem to have improved their mood, as Flinn raises his head. “Right, we need to show Aza around!”
“We could also train a bit,” Caelan muses.
“You have a one-track mind,” Flinn groans.
Erin laughs before chasing the guys out of her cottage. She returns shaking her head. “These three... They might not remember me, but I saw them as little boys. I know their mother, and she consulted with me about their lack of a fate.” She sits down next to me. “Alright, first I will show you some herbs and tell you how to brew them. It will help you meditate.”
I nod, and then Erin teaches me about herbs. How to dry them and brew them and what they will help me with. I try to listen carefully and soak up everything as well as I can. She promises to give me a list and proper instructions.
Eventually, though, we get to the more practical part of today’s lesson, and I find myself sitting on a pillow on the floor. “Always try to find a place you are comfortable and relaxed in,” she tells me. “With minimum distractions. Ideally, it would be outside, but it works inside, too.”
“I have a small library in my chambers in the castle. Would that work? The scent of books always puts me at ease.”
She nods. “You can certainly try.”
Erin has mixed together some fragranced oil, the whole room smelling like it now. It makes my head feel a touch dizzy. We start with breathing techniques first, and Erin teaches me how to stay with my body and not allow my mind to wander just anywhere.
“Werewolves believe in fate,” she tells me. “In many strings of fate, one of these is their mate bond. I want you to imagine that you have these fates too,” she says. “Envision it like strings going from your body to somewhere else… to another place, to a person. Alternatively, you can imagine a stream of water with little sub-streams spreading from the primary stream. Try it and imagine one after another.”
I choose to imagine the strings, and allow my mind to build several strings in my imagination, and carefully follow them. One leads me to Simin and one to Shayan. It’s easy to find and understand them. The other one is shaky, almost torn, leading me to my family in the desert, and seeing my bond like that fills me with sadness. I don’t linger much with it though, and instead follow my bond to the triplets… While Caelan and Flinn are easy for me to define, I’m having more difficulties with Endellion. I barely dare to even think in that direction, but if I allow myself to dream, I want to be his. I want him to hold me in his arms. I want to give myself to him, and have everything from him, too. I want to carry his mark!
I swallow thickly at my own thoughts, moving to the next bond. It leads me to the castle, the place I have started to call home, and that thought fills me with warmth.
The next one takes me longer to follow. It’s a thin bond but firm, and curiosity fills me as I follow it. It’s almost like I’m wandering through the snow. Suddenly the sun is gone, no warmth, and no light to illuminate my surroundings. I’m standing at the tip of a mountain, a freezing cold wind brushing over me and making me shiver. A blizzard seems to be approaching.
I can see her in it!
The woman in white. She is standing there, but she doesn’t seem to notice me. Instead, she just keeps staring at something in front of her, a vast empty area of snow.
Fear fills me, and I tear my gaze away, deciding to follow my instincts and retreat. When I turn around, there is a door in front of me. Curiosity fills me once more, and I open it, carefully peeking inside. I’m in a beautiful room, richly decorated, and people are whispering. I sneak closer, my eyes widening when I see a figure lying in a bed. He is wearing the necklace I already saw once. He is pale and there are beads of sweat on his forehead. A young guard sits next to him and holds his hand. Hang in there, my prince.
I stare at the young man. “Favian,” I whisper.
I step closer, eyeing him carefully. He is sick… that’s why we only meet in our dreams. Something is happening to him. Is this his reality? Where is this place? I wonder if all of them are dragons, if they are hiding away so as not to get erased from existence. I bend down a bit, touching Favian’s forehead. I’m starting to feel nauseous but will my feelings down.
As I touch him, my surroundings change once more, and I see him in front of me. I’m in your dreams, aren’t I?
I think so , he says. But princess of the sun, you shouldn’t. It’s dangerous.
There is a pull from the bond of fate connecting us… this is how I can enter his mind and meet with him!
Before I can connect further with it, though, I can feel a sudden pull from the other side. A sudden cold hits me, and I startle, feeling how I’m pulled out roughly from this illusion.
“Princess!” Erin calls. “Azadeh!”
My body winces as I open my eyes, finding myself lying on the floor with my head in her lap. There is something cold pressed against my forehead.
“You are back! Thank Goddess,” Erin sighs.
I jolt upwards as I feel a sudden wave of nausea hit me again. “Sick,” I breathe out.
Erin helps me up and hurries with me to her bathroom, where I empty my stomach in a bowl. I want her to leave me alone, feeling my body wince at having someone watch me in such a vulnerable state, but she stays with me.
“It’s my fault,” she whispers. “I’m sorry, Azadeh.”
I have no idea what she is talking about.
“Are you feeling better?”
I nod, feeling a bit wobbly. “I apologize,” I whisper.
“Come, I have a tea for you; it will help,” she says, leading me back to the living room. The scent of the herbs is gone, and fresh air comes through from the open windows.
She wraps me in a thick blanket, warming me up again, and hands me a cup of tea. For a split second I feel like throwing up again, but it settles fast, her medicine doing its miracles.
“What...” I take a shaky breath. “Erin… I saw Favian… and the woman in white…”
“I didn’t expect you to work it out that fast,” she explains. “Or, I would have taught you how to return. You can’t go that deep in on your first try.”
“I found Favian,” I utter, barely registering what she says. “It means I can reach out to his mind.”
“Yes.” Erin looks at me earnestly. “But, did you listen to me? You need to know how to return!”
“I… yes… Erin, I understand,” I agree, yet I can’t help the sudden feeling of hope filling me. “It’s just, I didn’t expect it to work so well.”
“Neither did I,” she admits. “As a human, it’s unbelievably amazing what you were able to do today,” she pauses. “But then, you are the gifted princess, after all.”
“Do you know what my gifts are about?” I ask her.
She shakes her head. “I’m sorry, I don’t. But… all I can say is that ever since you came to the kingdom, the harvests have been better. We have a lot of sunny days and fewer snowstorms.”
“But this can be a coincidence,” I say.
She smiles. “It could be, but it could also be due to you.”
“Will you teach me how to put up my walls and how to pull myself out of someone’s mind again?” I ask her.
“Yes, but I want you to take a break until tomorrow. Go and meet the triplet princes and let them show you around. Enjoy your time here.”