Chapter 3
Jax
I slump back into the armchair next to the bed, take Rylee’s hand in mine, and trace the outline of her ruby and emerald rings.
Then I make a path to her sapphire bracelet and back.
Her chest rises and falls in a slow, steady rhythm—the moon-and-stars tattoo beneath her collarbone peeks from the sheet half-covering her.
Even in sleep, she wears our tokens so proudly.
She’s alive, she’s just not here.
“I need you to come back to us,” I say, not for the first time. I use my free hand to smooth some of her blond hair off her cheek. She doesn’t react to my touch or voice. An overwhelming sense of dread pools in my gut.
What if she never wakes up?
What if—
“Jax, you need to sleep.” Pierce’s voice cuts through my panic, focusing me. “I can take this shift.”
None of us has slept well in the last week, all searching for ways to revive her or hunting for answers about the chaotic Athanry.
“I’ll sleep when she wakes up.” I shift back in the chair.
“Killing yourself won’t help her.” He crosses the room and stops near the edge of the bed, eyes raking over Rylee. His longing matches mine, as does his anguish.
I flash him a pointed look. “I’m not sleeping.”
“At least eat,” he begs. “I can have the kitchens send up something.”
“Has it happened again?” I ask, ignoring the worry in his voice.
Pierce leans against the wall next to where I sit and blows out a breath. “No, my power only came back for a blink. Hit me like a hammer.” He furrows his brow. “Then it was gone just as fast.”
“Tell me again,” I request, even though he’s told me the story a dozen times now.
Pierce rubs his palms over his face but indulges me. “In the brief moment my power returned, I entered Rylee’s mind. She was in your mother’s temple. Like she never left the Athanry. She was alone and scared.”
“You experienced her having a nightmare.” I press my lips together.
“Perhaps,” he says. “But it felt real. I’ve been in her mind enough times to know when she’s dreaming.” He meets my eyes. “This felt . . . different. My powers were snatched from me before I could explore her mind further.” He rubs at his chest, much like I did moments ago.
I know what he’s feeling—like if he paws at the spot enough, he might be able to mend the invisible, gaping wound. Without our powers, each of us feels wrong. Different. Lesser.
But it doesn’t matter. I’ll surrender my powers a thousand times if it means Rylee gets to live. That was the deal we made with our mothers.
I swallow hard. “Do you think our mothers played a cruel trick on us?”
“Why would they do such a thing?” Pierce asks.
“I don’t know. They seemed angry or jaded when we saw them during the Athanry. Not like how I remember them.” Though my memories are painted through the gaze of an adoring, naive child.
“Perhaps they were angry at us for wasting the Choosing elixir?” Pierce offers.
“Maybe. Maybe it’s something else. Maybe nothing. I just don’t understand why they’d ask for the sacrifice and then not allow Rylee to wake up.”
“Maybe she’s not waking up because our collective power combining with hers is too much for her psyche. We had years to develop and grow and learn how to control them. She wasn’t given the same luxury.”
No, we took that choice from her. Made a decision to bring her back, so ensnared by our grief, we didn’t stop to think about the consequences.
But our mothers said it would be her choice in the end, whether to return to this life, and she had returned.
Only for the weight of our powers and the strike of my blades to put an end to that.
“Any word on the Fader she defended?” I ask, lowering my voice. We didn’t tell our fathers about the specifics—that Rylee had repossessed our powers soon after she’d returned them to us and then stepped in front of two of my blades to protect a Fader.
“No,” Pierce answers. “I was on the hunt earlier today. Kal and Axl are out there now. Searching for her—” He cuts himself off.
Her sister.
That’s what he doesn’t say. What he can’t say.
Because there’s no one else in Lumathyst Rylee would protect.
Right?
She never spoke of anyone else important to her, beyond Ivy and Layce, and they’ve been here at the palace since the Athanry. They aren’t Faders.
But her sister? The one who’s been missing for over a year? I don’t want it to be true, but nothing else makes sense. Rylee wouldn’t put her life at risk for just anyone. Especially not with how intertwined all our lives are now. I squeeze her limp hand, willing her to respond.
“Has there been another attack?” I ask, gently placing her hand back on the bed by her side.
“Thankfully, no,” Pierce says. “The people are on edge enough with the stories spreading about the Athanry. The kings, naturally, are doing their best to assure them all is right and well, but I fear once news inevitably leaks that our mate is unconscious and possesses . . .” He glances over his shoulder, ensuring no one lingers beyond the closed door.
We’re alone. No one is listening. “All our powers,” he continues in a whisper.
“There will be an increase in attacks. Quite possibly a play from one of our enemies across the seas.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Rylee was only ever meant to gain the ability to balance us should we be a danger to each other when our powers reached their full strength. Now that she has full control of all of them? We’re in uncharted territory.
So, having Erithmore finally take a swing at us because they hear about our situation is the least of my concerns. ”
“I understand that, Jax,” Pierce says, his tone rough. “But you have to consider the possibilities. We all want Rylee back. Need her back. But we must protect the people of Lumathyst, too—”
“I don’t give a shit about Lumathyst!” I growl, gripping my knees. “Nothing matters if she doesn’t wake up. Do you think for one second that I wouldn’t burn this entire damned royal city to the ground if I thought it would bring her back?”
Pierce cocks an eyebrow, silently urging me to calm the fuck down.
I try.
It’s impossible.
“And the people in the Obsidian City?” he challenges. “Would you throw them in the flames as well?”
I glare at him.
“You wouldn’t,” he answers when I cannot. “Because Rylee returning to us won’t come down to a blood sacrifice.” He rolls his eyes. “She’s the most brilliant, strong, capable woman we’ve ever met. Do you think she won’t snap out of whatever is holding her back?”
Tension uncoils at the hope and certainty in his voice. “She will,” I say, nodding.
“She will,” he echoes. “And it’s up to us to ensure that this realm is at peace when she wakes. What sort of mates would we be if we allowed her to return to war and ruin?” Pierce asks, a small, broken smile on his face.
I can’t return it, but I nod in understanding.
A knock on the door sounds, and Pierce crosses the room to check who’s on the other side. After a few seconds, he swings the door open, and Mirren—one of our oldest, most trusted friends and Rylee’s handmaiden—-comes in, a tray of food in her hands.
“You will eat, Jax Lavine,” she says in a stern, motherly tone. “Or I will drag you out of this room by your ear.”
I press my lips together, a fleeting moment of levity dissolving in my chest as quickly as it rises.
Pierce manages a true laugh. I wonder if that’s because he’s so sure Rylee will return to us, where I’m riddled with nothing but doubt. I’ve loved very few things in my life, and each of those things has been taken from me. Hope is a dangerous game I rarely play.
Mirren places the tray on the table near the bed. “You too, Pierce.”
“Understood,” Pierce says.
Mirren lingers near Rylee, looking down at her with just as stern a look. “You’d better be ready for my lecture when you awaken, girl. I’m not fond of all this waiting. You’re being dramatic.” She turns back to me. “Eat,” she demands.
“I don’t take orders well.” I arch a brow at her. “From anyone—”
“Oh, enough with that,” she cuts me off, scooping a bread roll off the tray and holding it toward me, a look of challenge in her eyes. “Eat.”
I take the bread, immediately biting into it to satisfy the woman.
“Good.” She nods toward the food. “I want that tray empty by the time I get back.”
Pierce bows deeply as she passes him on her way out of the room, and it’s all I can do to force myself to take more bites.
Silence fills the space as Pierce and I eat, both of us looking to Rylee with a ridiculous hope that she’ll magically wake up and chide us for staring—
Kal bursts into my room, panicked. “Jax.”