Chapter 30
Rylee
“We’ve been summoned,” Axl says in dramatic fashion as he swings open the door of Jax’s bedroom.
I squint against the sudden onslaught of light, the golden beams drenching Axl like it can’t help but kiss his bare skin. He’s shirtless, of course, the way he prefers to be, his ink on full display.
Jax shifts beneath me, my head jostling against his chest. Something silver flies through the air, and one of his blades snicks into the woodgrain right next to Axl’s head.
“And it’s formal,” Axl grumbles, not remotely fazed by Jax’s outburst. “We have an hour.” He stalks in the opposite direction, and I hear his footsteps on the stairs leading up to his rooms in Jax’s home.
A heavy sigh rushes from my lungs as I stretch my limbs, my body arching against Jax’s. He tightens his hold on me as I stretch, rolling us until he’s on top of me.
“I don’t want to,” he whisper-growls into my ear, as if I’ve delivered the message. He shifts again, and I gasp as he settles between my thighs. “I want to stay here and keep playing with you.”
Heat sweeps through me like a wave of lava. “Not tired of me yet?” I tease.
“Never.” He shakes his head, the tip of his nose grazing along the line of my jaw as he inhales. “An eternity with you won’t be enough.”
Goddesses save me, this man.
I swallow hard, emotion clogging my throat as he draws back enough to look down at me again. He’s brutally beautiful, the sharp angles of his face, the fierce indigo shade of his eyes, the powerful intent behind them.
It’s been almost three weeks of nothing but practicing with their powers, hopping from city to city, sometimes with all of us present, other times not.
I’m starting to learn that despite my wildest fantasies, there may never be a time when we can all be together constantly.
There’s always business to attend to, whether that be Legend or prince issues.
And that’s okay; we’ve found a way to make it work.
We’ve had extensive conversations about Tox, the enhancement that gives non-powerful beings a boost in power, while nullifying or killing those who do have powers.
We haven’t heard back from Atlas yet, but we’re hopeful he’ll find something more solid for us soon.
And despite nightmares plaguing my sleep, I still wake up every day, wondering how I got so lucky to be mated to such incredible men.
I know something new and dangerous is knocking on our doors every second of every day.
I know my sister is still out there, acting as the leader of a rebel group that goes against everything I thought we stood for, but . . .
I’m happy.
I’m happier than I’ve ever been.
And it scares the shit out of me.
This kind of love, this amount of understanding and connection, is something I never thought I’d experience.
My mates have only ever made me feel treasured, loved, even when this one has me in chains and at his mercy.
I smile up at him, calling on the practice I’ve almost perfected after days and days of nonstop training. I open the door to Jax’s power, urging it to wash down our bond, swirling it around the connection, allowing him to feel every ounce of love and desire and happiness I feel in the moment.
Jax gasps as the power and emotions hit him, his eyes widening as he looks down at me in wonder. He smooths some of my hair back, kissing me quickly. “I don’t deserve that.” He shakes his head. “I don’t deserve you.”
I reach up, cupping his cheeks. “The Fates beg to differ,” I counter, focusing internally on that bond between us. I curl his power around it again, tighter this time, sharpening on that love between us. The one that is all-consuming, dangerous. “You feel that?”
Jax groans, moving against me in a devious way. “I do.”
“Then stop with the self-deprecation,” I demand. “Unless we’re playing a game, I don’t want to hear you say such things.”
He cocks an eyebrow at me. “Giving me orders now, butterfly?”
I shiver at the timbre of his voice, at the chaos in it.
“Only when I have to,” I answer, a little breathless. I move my hand from his cheek to his hair, threading my fingers into his blue-black strands. “Are you going to obey?” I tighten my grip on his hair at the roots, tugging just enough to emphasize my point.
He smiles—not my smile; the one of the Nightmare. Icy chills dust my skin, my heart racing as our bond trembles and he takes hold of his power. It’s a relief for all of three seconds before he’s sending it toward me, a prickle of fear piercing the back of my neck.
I close my eyes. Practice again. The prick.
It’s a small dose of fear that slides through my system, sweeping into those hollow, doubtful fractures in my soul. He’s doing it on purpose. He’s always warned me, from day one, that I should fly away.
He doesn’t think he’s worthy of the love I have for him. I’ve felt that more times than I can count since he gave his powers to me to save my life.
It doesn’t matter how many times we’ve had the argument, how many times I’ve countered it with how much I adore him, how I’m not afraid of him, how I’m not going anywhere . . . he doesn’t fully believe it. He thinks I’d be better off not attached to him, that I’d somehow be safer.
I know some of this comes from his past, losing his mom so young and being raised by Baydel. Goddess, it’s a wonder he has any love in him at all.
Still, he wants me to fly away. Wants me to be strong enough to make that choice for us both.
He’s going to have to get used to disappointment—
Fear grips my heart, a razor-sharp terror shooting through my veins.
I tremble in the Nightmare’s grasp. There’s no escaping this kind of dread. It’s endless. It’s . . .
Not real.
All the other powers inside me awaken, alerting at the threat now swimming around us. It’s an effort to push through the cold, dead fear, but with the help of the other powers, I manage to clear my mind enough to get angry.
“Cheater,” I accuse through chattering teeth. “We were talking, not practicing.” I can barely get the words out.
Jax’s grin deepens into that terrifying smile that usually draws me in. He shifts atop me, his free hand going to my throat.
I gasp as he gently grips it, his thumb stroking over the middle. “You think when you’re out there, facing our enemies, that you’ll get a warning?”
Another wave of fear crashes into me, but it’s met with a wave of frustration. He’s right. He’s always fucking right.
Internally, I’m scrambling, floundering in my own mind and soul as I reach for any power I can get ahold of. On the outside, I’m as still as a statue, frozen in the fear he’s creating.
His grip on me tightens, just a fraction.
I focus. Of course, my power, the one I’ve lived and breathed for years, is the closest.
A deep breath fills my lungs when I grip it, when the wind and air fill me so much they push back the terror.
I keep pushing it. Harder. All the way into Jax.
He wants to play hard? Fine. We’ll play hard.
I take hold of his breath. Stop him from taking his next.
His eyes go wide, the hand on my throat faltering.
“You feel that, Nightmare?” I ask, my head rushing with the way the fear drains from my body, replaced by nothing but power—way more than I should possess—as I hold the Nightmare’s life in my hands.
I grab hold of Pierce’s power, the other doors wide open in response to Jax’s sneak attack. I spear it toward Jax’s mind, filling it with a visual I want him to see.
Him.
How I see him.
I want him to see himself through my eyes—this beautiful, terrifying, increasingly irritating love of my life. My mate. My match in every way.
I show it all to him and send the emotions, too, all while I hold his very breath in my possession.
“Do you see?” I demand. “Do you understand?”
He nods. Just one slight dip of his head. That’s all the submission this man will give me, and I lap it up.
I restore his air and retreat from his mind.
He takes a gasping breath but barely finishes before his lips are on mine. A punishing kiss that I return with equal passion.
“Fucking love you,” he growls, his hands roaming everywhere they can reach. “You don’t understand how much.”
“I do,” I whisper, nipping at his bottom lip. “I assure you, I do.”
Another growl as he drags his hand down my thigh—
“If we’re going to be late and risk whatever punishment the kings will see fit for such a crime, then I’m at least joining you two.” Pierce’s voice is like liquid velvet from where he stands in the open doorway.
Jax groans, shifting to look back at him, his free hand moving quicker than I can follow.
A blade hurtles straight for Pierce, who doesn’t flinch.
I do. Immediately. Instinctually. A band of glittering green energy springs from my fingertips to stop the blade a hair’s breadth from Pierce’s shoulder, the tip almost touching his immaculate emerald suit.
“Thank you,” he says, taking a step away from the blade and brushing a hand casually down his suit jacket. “This is one of my favorites.”
Jax is grinning down at me in an innocent way that makes me laugh.
“Enough with the knife throwing,” I playfully demand, nudging at his bare chest. “We need to get dressed.”
I earn a growl for that.
“Please,” I say, meaning it. “The tasks on this damned list are hard enough. Baydel is waiting for me to fail. Lucas and Brooks probably are, too. The only king I think we have in my corner is Jullian, and I’m not sure if any of the RAC likes me at all.
Even after all the work we’ve done in the cities with the people. We can’t afford to test them.”
Jax relents, rolling off me.
“Thank you,” I say, sliding out of his bed.
Pierce’s eyebrows draw upward as he looks me up and down. Heat pools low in my core at that look. It doesn’t matter how many times my mates have seen me fully bare to them, they still look at me like it’s the first time.
My heart is so damn full, it almost eclipses the growing anxiety at being summoned for the next task on the Kings’ List.
Almost.
But it comes full force after we’ve all dressed in our finest, my mates in their signature colors and me in a mixture of ruby and sapphire today—a tight pair of red leggings that are buttery soft beneath the long-sleeved dress of blue, the fabric around my waist split on either leg to show the pop of red.
Ash is atop an onyx table in Jax’s entryway, lounging in a sunbeam, his limbs half hanging over the edge as we approach the front door. He hisses as Kal and Axl head out first, then downright growls at Pierce when he pauses to try to make small talk with him.
“I won’t give up,” he says to the cat, like it can understand him, before turning and winking at me and heading out.
Jax grins at Ash, stopping to stroke his fingers over his scarred head. The feline purrs under his touch, leaning into it and demanding more.
I know how he feels.
I laugh, drawing Jax’s attention, but he doesn’t dare stop petting.
“What?” he asks.
I shrug. “It’s . . .” A strange and satisfying thing to see. The Nightmare’s companion. I shake my head. “I’m glad he likes at least one of us,” I say. “He barely tolerates me, and he clearly doesn’t like the others.”
Jax tilts his head, and Ash lies back down, clearly finished with him. “I’ve never had anything prefer me over my friends,” he says, almost to himself. He blinks a few times, that hardened edge to his features returning as he faces me. “Not that it’s ever been a competition between us.”
My heart aches for him, for how little he thinks of himself.
“I love you all equally,” I say.
“I know,” he says, sliding his hands into his jacket pockets. “And I’m still shocked by that.”
I part my lips to argue, but he stops me. “I’m trying,” he says. “I really am. I’m working on it. I just . . . I’m going to need time. This is all new to me.”
I nod, fully understanding.
“Are you ready for this?” he asks.
“I’m starting to dread that question,” I tease. “But when have I ever been ready for any of this?”
He laughs, low and rough. “When have any of us?”
“At least we’re in this together,” I say.
“And you’re in control of everything,” he adds.
“Mostly,” I say, knowing that I’m not perfect at wielding their powers, but I’m in a more stable place for sure.
Of course, it hasn’t truly been tested. If a Fader attack happened and they were threatened, I wouldn’t trust myself with their powers.
All the more reason for my practices at locking them up or forcing them back to their rightful owners.
“There’s nothing you can’t face,” Jax says, stepping closer. “You died.” His voice cracks over the words. “And here you stand. More powerful than all the kings combined.”
I choke on that. “I’m only here because of what each of you sacrificed,” I say. “And as for being more powerful than the kings?” I shrug. “I’m not consistent. Sometimes I can hold the powers for what feels like forever. Other times, it’s mere minutes.”
“It’s more than you could do when you first awoke,” he says. “With more time? You’ll be unstoppable.”
I don’t know what to say to that, especially when all I want to do is give them their powers back. I don’t want them. It’s too much. It’s all too much.
“Let’s go,” I say instead of voicing that sentiment. “We can’t be late.”
Jax nods, gesturing to the open door.
I walk out, smiling at the Legends already mounted on their velomages. Jax mimics them, and I climb on behind him. The five of us ride toward the palace like a deadly unit intent on earning our place in this realm.