Chapter 7
Chapter
Seven
Kraghol paused at the edge of the clearing, watching the bonfire rage. It stood over three times his height. Smoke and ash choked the air. Around the clearing, broken branches and ripped-up trees lay scattered around. The fire would burn until dawn.
Bonfire Night. A night in early December when the krampuses came together. It marked the beginning of the celebrations leading up to Krampus Night.
Some krampuses lived scattered throughout the forest near Anorra. Others lived further away. But they all came together for Bonfire Night, stayed until Krampus Night, and remained around for the celebrations that lasted days afterwards.
Kraghol despised Bonfire Night. But truthfully, Kraghol despised all krampus gatherings.
“Brother!” Freya, his older sister, strode towards him. A wide smile stretched her lips. “We haven’t seen you in a while.”
“I’ve been busy.”
Throughout the year, krampuses who lived near one another gathered once or twice a month. Always at night, since krampuses were nocturnal. Kraghol only went around during the day because that was when Jasper came to the forest.
Kraghol avoided the gatherings. He wished he could avoid tonight, but he knew his sister and grandmother would notice and not tolerate that. So here he was.
Her eyes flicked over him. “You’re looking a little off.” Beads, bones, and stones hung on cords around her neck. They marked her as a krampus spiritual guide.
It was an honour to have such a role, especially in someone as young as his sister. The elders, those who led the krampuses, had all been spiritual guides earlier in their lives. In fact, being a spiritual guide meant you were on the path to one day being an elder.
“I am fine.” Could his sister sense that Kraghol had partially mated someone? Did spiritual guides have that ability? A lot of their skills remained a mystery to Kraghol.
Thankfully she turned away from him and looked towards the bonfire. “Bonfire Night is going well.” Freya placed her hands on her hips. “And it will be a glorious Krampus Night. The people of the city will know we are the harbingers of fear.” She bared her teeth.
Unlike himself, his sister was a true krampus at heart. She embraced their purpose. She loved Krampus Night and being a krampus.
A screech wrenched the air, louder than the other yells and cries and ringing of bells. He turned towards the source of the sound.
Of course. My grandmother.
She stood on a platform that had been erected overlooking the fire. On the platform were chairs of woven branches where the half a dozen elders sat. But right now all the elders, including his grandmother, stood.
His grandmother held her head high. Her black horns curled. Her eyes glowed red. A krampus’s eyes tended to only glow red when they were experiencing heightened emotions, like anger or fear. But his grandmother was a powerful krampus. As a result, she could make her eyes glow red at will.
The crowd grew quiet as they faced his grandmother. She did not speak for several long moments. But no one made a sound, out of either respect or fear. Either of those reasons would be satisfactory to her.
“Soon it will be Krampus Night.” Her voice rang over the crowd. “We will descend on Anorra. We will scream and howl and whip.” Her eyes glowed brighter. “The city folk will know they need to behave and keep away from evil or suffer the consequences!” Her voice rose.
Applause and yells filled the air. She lifted her hands. Immediately everyone fell silent.
“Last year, the snowstorm ruined Krampus Night!” she shouted. “They could not see or hear us as we made our way through the city.”
The snow had been so thick. Kraghol and the others had struggled to move through the streets. The wind had howled, drowning out their voices and bells. No one had been out. Those inside had seemed not to even notice their presence.
He’d barely seen anyone watching or peering out through the windows. Unlike the other krampuses, he’d been relieved.
“But this year, we will make up for the last. This year, we will be better than any year previously!” his grandmother yelled. “They will know us! They will fear us! They will respect us!” She threw back her head and screamed.
The clearing erupted with cries and howls. Then the krampuses resumed dancing. His grandmother looked out over them all.
“Go, Kraghol. Pay your respects to Grandmother.” Freya clapped him on the shoulder. “Then join us.” She walked over to her mate, Thorsten, and their parents, who were all already dancing and swinging switches and whips through the air.
Reluctantly, Kraghol walked towards the platform on the other side of the fire. His grandmother watched the dancers.
“Grandmother.” He bowed low to the woman who’d raised him.
His parents had often taken off for long periods of time when Freya and Kraghol were growing up. They’d never been attentive parents. This meant their grandmother had been the main one to raise them. She’d relished the role, since she wanted to shape her grandchildren into proper krampuses.
Clearly, she’d failed with Kraghol.
His grandmother turned slowly and stared down at him. “Kraghol, I worried you would not come tonight. Your absence from recent gatherings has been noted.”
“I’m sorry, Grandmother.”
“But Freya was certain you’d not let us down. Not tonight, at least.” She lifted her chin. “I am glad she is correct there.”
Kraghol swallowed, uncertain how to respond.
His grandmother studied him for several long seconds. “You do not take your duty as a krampus seriously, Grandson. I know you are not enthusiastic about Krampus Night.”
“That’s not true, Grandmother,” he said, although he knew it was.
His throat tightened at just the thought of running through Anorra whilst horrified children watched him from their windows. He wondered what it would be like to make a child smile instead of cry. Or laugh.
Kraghol just wasn’t a very good krampus. Nor did he want the life of a krampus.
For a second, he thought of Jasper. He wondered what his partial mate’s life was like.
Kraghol had never been inside an actual building before.
But when he’d run through the streets, lanes, and alleys of Anorra on Krampus Night, he caught glimpses of the insides of the homes through the windows.
He saw comfy chairs, beds, fireplaces, decorated trees, and glittering baubles.
Did Jasper have all those things in his home? In winter did he sit by a pretty tree in front of a fireplace, on a cosy-looking chair?
Kraghol’s heart swelled in his chest. I hope he has all that. And so much more. He wished Jasper had happiness and joy and beauty and warmth for all his days for the rest of his life.
And he hoped with all his might that Jasper would not look out his window on Krampus Night and see the monster that was Kraghol. Kraghol’s stomach clenched as he stared at his grandmother’s hooves.
“Everyone must pull together this year, especially after last Krampus Night.”
“That could not be avoided, Grandmother. The snowstorm could not be overcome.”
“Excuses!” she snarled. “We could have yelled louder. We could have banged on windows and rattled doors and filled their souls with dread until they shit and pissed themselves.” The light from the fire danced on her dark fur. “But this year will be better.” She smiled.
His grandmother truly loved Krampus Night.
Every year, foolhardy individuals intentionally stayed out so they could brave being chased by the krampuses. Usually it was a bunch of young fools. To them it was a challenge to try to outrun the krampuses. His grandmother delighted in hunting them down and beating them with her switch or whip.
Of course, there were others who also liked to be chased by krampuses. But they did not wish to outrun them. They wanted to be fucked by a krampus. His grandmother also liked to hunt down these individuals.
She looked at Kraghol. “As my blood, I expect you to do your part this year.”
He inclined his head.
She stared at him. His entire life, he’d always felt like she’d seen right to his soul and to his defects as a krampus.
“And I have been thinking.” His grandmother straightened her muscular shoulders. “After Christmas, you should take a mate. Perhaps finding a krampus mate will solidify your place amongst us and remind you of your duty.”
His heart thumped rapidly against his ribs. Kraghol lowered his gaze in what he hoped would be seen as respectful.
He could not obey his grandmother in this. Even if he had wanted to. He could not mate a krampus. Not now. Because he was already partially mated to Jasper. And he did not know how long it would take for that partial bond to fade. He didn’t dare ask anyone.
His grandmother looked back to the fire and the other krampuses dancing and hollering. Their tongues lashed at the skies. Switches and whips swung through the air. Bells jangled.
“You are a krampus. You have a duty, Kraghol. I expect you to remember it and fulfil it,” his grandmother said, voice like flint.
“Yes, Grandmother.”
“Look at your family. They make me so proud.” His grandmother lifted her hand towards them.
Kraghol looked. Freya, Thorsten, his mother, and his father writhed and danced by the flames and amongst the smoke.
“We are the monsters in the dark,” his grandmother said. “This is who we are. This is our role. We are here to keep order. To remind people to behave or face chaos and terror. Be proud to be one of us, Kraghol. You are a krampus. Embrace it.”
Kraghol didn’t respond. But his grandmother’s words crept like ice through his veins. He fought the urge to shiver despite the heat of the bonfire.
His grandmother flicked her hand towards those dancing around the fire. “Now join your family. Join your kin.”
Without a word, Kraghol obeyed and walked forward. He joined his parents, his sister, and her mate. His parents smiled at him.
Kraghol danced. But inside he wished he was anywhere but here.
Yes, this is where I belong. I am a krampus. This is all I can ever have.
He squeezed his eyes shut, wishing it wasn’t true whilst knowing it was.
Kraghol danced amongst the krampuses, soul sinking in his body. He opened his mouth and screamed from the bottom of his aching soul.
He wished his life could be different. He wished he could find a way to get away from all this. He wished he could find a way for he and Jasper to be together. But that could never be.