Chapter 18 Yara
YARA
There was something in the darkness of the night that invited my soul from a very young age, beckoning me especially on those nights when I felt that my life had no more meaning and that no matter what I did someone would somehow get hurt.
I used to believe that it was my twin, finally coming to take away this rotten soul that was left to roam the earth while he continued to exist somewhere in the clouds, much happier than I ever would be.
Maybe I should have been jealous, envious of the faceless boy who would've been a part of me, who would've made me feel less alone, if it wasn't for the fact that I knew he wouldn't have been able to handle our parents.
He wouldn't be able to withstand the cruelty of this imperfect world.
I didn't regret killing him in the womb, not in the way many people wanted me to regret it.
My only regret was that I didn't follow.
That I couldn't join him somewhere up there, among the stars I looked at as I came to the entrance to the cemetery I haven't been to before, pretending I could feel him.
Some days, I thought he was there, right next to me, guiding me when I wanted to simply give up and stop this hurt from spreading from my heart through my bones.
And I was tired of people kicking me when I was already down.
I was tired of having to prove myself. I was fucking tired of having to fight for my own life even when I left them all alone.
It sounded whiny, it sounded like something a child would say, but it was no longer fair having to feel like this.
Whatever it was I have done in my past life, I wanted to think I have already paid for all my crimes.
I wanted to think that the darkness living inside my bones had already paid the price.
But it would seem not.
My entire body froze in the spot as the sound of branches breaking flickered through the forest behind me, and before I had a real chance to think it through, I started running through the cemetery, rushing between the tombstones, hoping they didn't see me.
I had no idea how long I already ran—minutes, hours—but it felt as if an eternity had passed since I abandoned the hope that Xavier would ever see me as something worthy of having.
His words no longer had any meaning, not to me, and had he meant what he said to me in front of that place, he would've stopped me from running away.
He could've told me about this stupid game.
He could've done something, anything, but he let me go.
He let me be chased like a rabid animal running from hunters.
I could hear them when we started running, howling to the moon, cackling, mocking like a pack of hyenas, telling us they were coming for us.
It wasn't the voices of the others that froze the blood in my veins, but the Rhett’s voice that kept coming closer and closer until I started running faster, begging my muscles to work.
I prayed to the stars above and the gods and goddesses I desperately wanted to believe in, but I could feel it, deep in my gut, that this fucked up game of theirs would be the last thing I would ever do.
I never wished for a lot. Just a little bit of peace for my soul and a little bit of love I could call my own.
Peace wasn't something I was familiar with, but during those moments with Xavier I could almost taste it on the tip of my tongue, showing me what life could really be like.
This place was supposed to be just a stop before I could get on with my life, far away from my mother and everything that held me back, but now I knew that destiny had other plans for me.
Plans I couldn't foresee and I should have. I should have taken the first bus out of St. Bipal's, disappearing without a trace, but my greedy little heart wanted to stay. Deep down I wanted him to come for me, to take me back to that limbo where we could be just us.
The pain cut through my lungs, unused to this kind of physical activity, and no matter how much I ran, no matter how far I went, I didn't know this place.
I didn't know this fucking forest. My eyes were barely adjusting to the dark, but every new step felt as if I was walking over a hot coil, becoming slower.
Blinking through the fatigue taking over, my heart thundered faster as the small crypt appeared in front of me, and a small flicker of hope started burning in the center of my chest. Hope I stopped feeling since they took me. Hope that could keep me going now.
Turning around wasn't an option, and I didn't dare looking back to see if anyone was following.
The fog started descending on the ground, built from the humidity and the shattered dreams seeping through our pores, and I begged whatever was out there to save me.
To give me just a little bit more time. Just one more day and I promised I would do things differently.
My right hand landed on the side wall of the crypt, and as I rounded the corner my eyes zeroed in on the doors—the entrance to the crypt.
They wouldn't look for me here. No one in their right mind would want to hide in a place crawling with bugs, probably rats and some dead bodies, but I had no other choice.
My fingers wrapped around the handle on the door, "Please be unlocked. Please, please, plea—" Yes! The doors croaked as I pushed them open, making me wince as I stepped inside, but I couldn't hear anything coming from the outside. Maybe I had imagined those branches breaking.
Maybe I had lost them.
It's been a while since I heard the giggling, moans and howling of the guys chasing the girls, so maybe, just maybe, whatever forces were out there had heard my cries for help. Maybe things were starting to change for me and Rhett wouldn't be able to get me.
I could still feel his touch on my leg from when we were in his car. I could still feel those filthy words he whispered, his laughter, the poison dripping from his lips, and for a hundredth time, I regretted not telling Xavier about it. I regretted not telling someone at least what he had said.
Perhaps if I had he wouldn't have been here tonight. He wouldn't have been one of the guys in that room, assigned to guard me. Maybe he wouldn't have been chasing me.
I stepped deeper into the crypt, slowly pushing the doors to close, but I was too late.
I was too fucking slow.
An arm came out of nowhere, wrapping around my neck from behind me, pulling me back out of the crypt.
"No!" I screamed as the hand landed over my lips, shutting me up.
"I got you now," he laughed, walking backwards as I thrashed and kicked, but there was no use.
His face landed in the valley between my neck and my shoulder, inhaling me sharply, making me shiver from the disgust rolling through my body.
"I told you I would get a piece of that pussy, Yara.
I told you it was futile trying to stop me. "
My brain knew who it was, but I refused to listen.
I refused to acknowledge the fact that it was Rhett who held me against him, rubbing his fucking dick against my backside.
His filthy scent invaded my nostrils even through the humidity of the night and the stale scent of decay coming from the crypt.
"Your little boy isn't coming to save you.
" His laughter grated in my ears, his words piercing through my heart.
"He told us he had no interest in participating tonight, so guess what that means?
" I didn't want to know. I didn't want to acknowledge the fact that Xavier didn't even give a fuck on who got me tonight.
"That means you're free game. That means that any one of us could take you, fuck you, claim you.
Do you know what the Harvest is?" I shook my head, trying to stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks.
He didn't deserve them. None of them deserved my tears. None of them deserved to see me break, least of all a maniac holding me right now.
"I didn't think you did," he murmured as his free left hand dragged over my hip, bunching the material of the dress I wore.
"The Harvest is something our parents did, their parents and the ancestors that were here since the town was created.
To preserve the lines, to make sure their kids would marry someone worthy of their name.
You were never supposed to be here, because we all know you're not worthy and you could never be a part of our circle.
Not with blood like yours. You're trash, Yara, we all know it.
Xavier knows it as well, that's why he decided to bring you here as a little plaything for us.
" Had he ripped my heart out it would've hurt less than the words spilling over his lips.
"Those other girls—" he squeezed my hip, "—they're worthy and one of them will become Xavier's wife.
Maybe not tonight, but he needs to choose and the only way he will ever get married is if he marks his bride on the night of the full moon, when the Harvest is happening. That bride would never be you."
I tried to stop them. I tried to tell my heart it didn't matter, but it did.
It didn't matter to this organ in my chest that I logically knew Xavier never really cared about me.
It didn't matter that I understood on some deeper level that Rhett was right.
All that mattered to the battered heart somehow still beating was the fact that Xavier touched me as if he loved me.
He looked at me as if he truly cared. His words, his reactions, they were all lies and I fell for it.
I fell for it when I said I wouldn't.
"But don't you worry," he crooned. "I have plans for you. Plans that don't involve Xavier, and the sooner you get aboard of them, the better it will be for you."
He removed his hand from my mouth, allowing me to inhale properly for the first time since he dragged me out, and before I could ask what he meant, a sharp pain jolted my entire body, coming from my neck.
My body rebelled against it, against the pain, the cold substance he had injected me with, but there was no use.
My body was too weak to fight it, and as Rhett stepped away from me and turned me around, his words were the last thing I heard before the ground disappeared beneath my feet and the darkness started swallowing the stars above.
"Sleep tight, Yara. We will have so much fun."