Chapter 11
The snow was gently falling as Nathan’s giggles echoed through the garden. Ava’s heart swelled with joy.
For what seemed like the umpteenth time, the little boy trudged through the snow to the patch of ice, where he stamped his feet and held out his hand for her to take.
Ava held his little mittened hand, and he walked bravely onto the ice.
His feet slipped, and she broke his fall, helping him land gently on his bottom.
A giggle burst out of him, and before she knew it, she was on the ground, giggling next to him.
The afternoon air was crisp, but the bite to it made her feel alive. Warmth spread through her body, and she did not mind so much that her nose stung from the cold. She could not count their footprints in the snow from all the fun they had had. She wished she could remember this moment forever.
Nathan’s blue eyes glinted almost silver in the sunlight that peeked through the clouds.
His pearly white baby teeth matched the snow around them.
Bits of snow had melted into his ear-length brown hair and made it stick up in all directions.
He looked like a little wildling. He reminded Ava so much of herself that she did not know if she should laugh or cry.
He took her hand again, and together they slipped on the ice. He collapsed onto her stomach as she crashed into the snow, and they both burst into giggles.
The sound of boots crunching in the snow came from behind them. Then a shadow fell over them, and Ava looked up to see Caden’s frowning above her upside down.
“What are ye doing?” he barked, instantly ruining the peace and joy of the moment.
The birds stopped chittering in the trees. All that could be heard was their breathing.
Little white clouds formed above Ava’s face as she let out a laugh to ease the tension.
“We’re slipping on the ice. Care to join us?”
“Do I look like I want to join ye?” he shouted. “How could ye be so irresponsible, letting him fall down so many times? He could get hurt!”
Ava sat up, with Nathan still in her arms. She could not argue with her husband while lying on the ground.
“I’m right here. I would never let him get hurt!”
She set Nathan on his feet and stood, brushing the snow from her skirts. The boy immediately hid behind her.
“He’s me heir; he must be protected at all costs! Do ye nae understand that? Is that they way ye’re going to raise him?” Caden scolded.
“Nathan is just enjoying the world! Like all of us should, if ye ask me!” Anger flared hot in her chest.
How dare he speak to her that way?
“I didnae ask ye,” he ground out.
“Actually,” she held up a finger, “ye did. When ye asked me to be his maither.”
She planted one hand on her hip and the other on Nathan’s shoulder to reassure him.
I willnae let this brute terrify the boy. Ye asked me to protect the lad, husband, and that’s what I will do. I will protect him even from ye.
“So…” Caden tilted his head, studying her. “Did ye want to escape marriage so ye can run outside like a toddler?”
Ava tossed her head, shocked. “Nay! I just wanted to be free.” She looked at him like he had decided to walk around without his head just for the fun of it. “Ye promised me freedom, remember?”
“Aye, but I didnae promise ye could do whatever ye wanted with Nathan.”
“Well, this is certainly nae freedom, me Laird. Nathan needs to be free to play, at the very least. A bairn’s got to run around and be wild. Didnae ye ever have fun, husband?”
“This is a ridiculous conversation,” Caden snarled. “We arenae here to talk about me! We’re talking about ye putting Nathan at risk!”
“Risk? He was just playing in the snow, what sort of risk is that!” Ava shot back.
Nathan cried out and clamped his little mittened hands over his ears. Ava instantly regretted yelling. A little child like Nathan should not be exposed to such tension and loud noises.
“Nathan, I—” She made to reach for him, but he stuck his thumb in his mouth and ran back to the castle, tears streaming down his red face.
She turned to glare at her brute of a husband, who was starting to resemble a giant snowman as the snow fell on his hair and shoulders.
“Happy now, me Laird?” she hissed.
She gave him a mocking bow, before turning on her heel and running after Nathan. She caught up to him quickly and put a gentle hand on his shoulder, drawing him to a halt.
His cheeks were streaked with tears, his mittened thumb was still stuck in his mouth, and little wisps of wool clung to his tears.
Ava knelt before him. “Nathan, dearie, I’m so sorry.” She looked deeply into his eyes. “Can I take ye into the castle to warm up?”
Nathan nodded, allowing her to pick him up.
As she rose to her feet, she realized Caden was still standing in the same spot, staring at them. She shook her head and held Nathan closer, before turning around and trudging toward the castle through the snow .
“I’m so sorry, lad,” she whispered again in his ear.
Nathan buried his face in her neck and continued sucking on his thumb.
The wide double doors welcomed them into the warmed foyer. A gust of wind pushed them inside, and she had to lean against the door to get it shut properly. A shiver ran down her spine, and she welcomed the warmth seeping into her skin.
The nursemaid stood at the top of the stairs, a sad smile on her face. Nancy was a plump and soft-mannered woman, with greying hair and grey eyes.
“Poor dear.” She frowned. “He hasnae sucked on his wee thumb in a year.” She held out her hands to take him.
Ava shook her head. “It’s all right, Miss Nancy. I’ve got him tonight, but thank ye. I have a few sins I need to atone for. I think some bedtime stories and cuddles might do the trick.” She smiled half-heartedly, hoping her eyes conveyed her gratitude.
“Aye, and I suspect some warm sweetened milk should do the trick as well.” The nursemaid smiled and rubbed a hand on the little one’s back. “I’ll go warm some up for the two of ye.”
Nathan sniffled in reply.
Ava smiled kindly at the nursemaid, before taking Nathan to his room to get him changed into a comfortable shirt and robe.
She was so angry with herself for letting Caden get the better of her. She should not have lost her temper back there.
Curse ye, Caden, for ruining the day.
The sky was now fully grey, and a winter storm was blowing in. Caden stood in the icy wind, punishing himself for being so stupid.
What is the matter with ye? Why would ye let her get to ye? She’s only yer wife. The boy should have been safe. She should have listened to me instead of arguing with me. I’m the laird of this clan. I’m the boy’s guardian, nae her.
Caden could not figure out why it bothered him so much that Ava was angry with him. He ignored the snow that was gathering on his shoulders and hair, and tried to sort through his thoughts.
He hated being wrong, but this felt like one of the very few times in his life that he might have been.
Finlay opened the front door and poked his head out, waving for him to come inside.
Caden shook his head. He could have sworn he heard a curse before his brother stepped out into the snowstorm.
“May I ask what ye’re supposed to be doing out here, me Laird?” Finlay asked as he ran up to him.
Caden grunted in reply.
“Ye’re a damn fool, Braither.” Finlay frowned.
Caden jerked his head up and glared at him, but Finlay merely raised his eyebrows, as if to say, Ye ken I’m right, daenae deny it.
“What am I a fool for, Braither?” Caden bit back.
Finlay started counting on his fingers. “First, for being out in a snowstorm like a sulking statue without a cloak. Second, for yelling at Ava and Nathan for having fun. Has something gotten into yer head? Are ye ill?” He looked at him the way Ava had, as if he had left his head behind somewhere and was walking around without it.
“I didnae want Nathan to get hurt,” Caden retorted, defensive.
“It was a wee patch of ice, Braither. He was fine. Ye just didnae want him having fun without ye, and ye resent Ava for it. That’s how I see it.” Finlay crossed his arms and shot him a look, daring him to deny it.
“He’s me heir, Finlay. He needs to be protected at all times,” Caden argued.
“That’s a load of horse shite.” Finlay barked a laugh. “Ye did far more dangerous things at his age, like climbing on the roof of the stables and chasing after wild dogs, trying to make them yer pets.”
“There was ye, in case I died,” Caden mumbled.
“Uh-huh. And what about that time when ye tried to kill me? I swear it was at least once a fortnight.”
“Och, please. We were just playing tag-o’-war. It isnae me fault ye werenae strong enough and fell in the lake.”
“I almost drowned.”
“I saved ye just fine.”
“Ye cannae save everyone alone, me Laird. Ye must let other people help ye with the saving, ye ken. I doubt we’ll ever hear Nathan’s voice again after today.”
Caden sighed but did not say anything. He hated it when his brother was right.
“Listen, get yer arse inside, at least. I wouldnae want ye to die of frostbite. Plus, I daenae want to take up the mantle and wait for Nathan to grow up to take his rightful place.” Finlay shoved his shoulder playfully, before turning to go back inside.
“Oh, and find a way to apologize, me Laird!” he added over his shoulder.
Caden frowned down at his fingers, which were turning blue.
Ach, I hate that the bastard is right. I guess I shouldnae have been so harsh. I have to find a way to make it up to them.