Chapter 14
Her heart trembled.
Her throat was thick with emotion.
Her body was still aflame.
Nora sat beside a stream, cupping her hands in the water and cleaning herself. The slick wetness stained her thighs like morning dew, while her breaths were heaving.
Never before had she experienced anything like this. The way he touched her… it was as though lightning coursed through her and the storm showed no sign of abating. What Callan did was akin to sorcery.
And it was wrong.
Terribly, terribly wrong.
She was wrong for letting it happen.
Why didn’t she stop him? She could have pushed him away, could have screamed and slapped and kicked him, but she’d stood there and let it happen because she was weak.
Because she wanted it.
Because she had been curious and when his hand started moving down her body she liked the way she responded.
She told herself that as soon as it started to feel strange or uncomfortable she would tell him to stop, but that moment never arrived.
Instead, what unfolded was a dancing array of wild delight and ecstasy that played havoc with her mind and left her feeling transformed.
And just his fingers… just his fingers could elicit all of these sensations from her. Imagine what he could do with…
No.
She reached up and splashed herself with cool water, trying to douse this unwanted flame. At least she thought it was unwanted.
It should have been unwanted.
How was she ever supposed to face Laird MacPherson? She was supposed to be pure, untouched, her virtue intact. While she and Callan hadn’t done anything more, she still believed this counted.
It certainly felt as though it counted.
“Are ye gaeing tae stay here all day?” Callan asked, calling out from a ridge.
Nora turned, looking over her shoulder. She stepped out of the stream.
The hem of her dress caught the shallow part and was stained, not that it mattered.
She’d become a mess a long time ago. She tried to smooth down her hair, but she wasn’t sure she would ever be proper again.
All her life she had been taught that women who did this kind of thing out of marriage were wrong, sinful, and wicked, but she didn’t classify herself as one of them.
It wasn’t as though she made a habit of it.
It was just… just… oh, she didn’t know why it happened, only that it had.
And it couldn’t be taken back.
Not that she would have wanted it to be taken back.
She trudged back to Callan, staring at him. Her eyes naturally drifted towards his fingers now. They had been hidden under her dress as they danced their secret dance, but she felt them. His fingertips would never be the same to her now. They were far more delicate than she would have guessed.
“I hae been thinking. Perhaps we should return tae the cabin instead of running around after MacPherson. It’s nae good chasing him all the time. We need tae find out where he is, and I’d rather spend a night under shelter rather than out here,” Callan said.
Nora agreed mutely, nodding just once. She curled her arms around her chest. Part of her wanted to leave, to find the nearest estate and wait there for Laird MacPherson.
But then she looked at Callan and found she couldn’t leave.
Nora tried to remind herself of his true nature.
He was a thief, a scoundrel, a killer. He was just like the bandits who killed her parents.
Except he wasn’t.
He believed what he was doing was right. He used the coin he stole to help people. Orphans. He’d suffered, losing his home and his parents. Was it any wonder that he had turned out the way he had? Life had been hard for him, and somehow they had been thrown together.
She couldn’t leave him now. Perhaps she couldn’t ever leave him. Was she trapped? Had the invitation into her body been a silent promise, a commitment from which she could not back away?
Everything had seemed so simple, yet now she couldn’t think straight at all.
They made their way back to the cottage.
Nora couldn’t bring herself to speak. Callan didn’t try.
The horse clopped steadily until the familiar sight greeted them.
They were just dismounting the horse when heavy rain started.
It fell from nowhere and pelted against the ground.
Callan held the door open and ushered her in.
The horse stood under a rudimentary shelter that stretched from the roof of the cabin.
Nora quickly dried herself while Callan got a fire going. The rain rattled against the roof and walls while the fire started crackling. Flames danced as though they had been freed from nothingness.
“That’s better,” Callan said, and settled to warm his hands.
Nora joined him, but the cabin seemed smaller now.
It was as though the walls were moving, seeking to push her towards Callan again.
She became acutely aware of the distance between them and stared at his outstretched fingers.
They had conjured a fire in her as well, and she almost groaned as the ache swelled again in the deepest part of her.
“Ye hae been quiet all the way, lass. I hope ye ken that what we did was nae wrong,” Callan said quietly, his voice barely audible over the fire.
“It was,” Nora barely parted her lips. The words were a fraught whisper.
Callan shifted and frowned. “It’s a natural part of life. It’s—”
“I’m promised tae another.”
“Ye think MacPherson hae kept himself pure? The only virtue in life comes with daeing what makes ye happy. I ken ye enjoyed it. I felt it.”
Nora shifted her weight. An unsettling feeling swept through her because Callan was right and because he had been given an intimate insight into her true feelings.
It felt strange to know that someone else had created such intense feelings within her and that there was no way she could lie about it because he had felt everything, the shudders, the moans, and the whimpers.
“It was wrong,” Nora repeated in a flat tone. It wasn’t enough to convince her either.
Callan stared at her. She could see him out of the corner of her eye, although she kept her gaze fixed on the fire.
“Lass, I think people are too concerned with right and wrong. All ye can dae is try to be happy. Life is too short tae dae anything otherwise. What’s the use of worrying?”
“Because… because my clan depends on it. Because marrying MacPherson means that he will help them.”
“Dae ye still believe that? Even after all we hae seen? He dinnae take care of his own people. What makes ye think he will take care of yers?” Callan replied.
Nora was stunned into silence. She’d been harboring the same thoughts, but what was the alternative?
“Dae ye truly want tae be promised tae him?”
“Nae. I never wanted any of this. It was all Hamish’s idea and I hae tae make the best of it. I hated it, but at least I ken what I should dae. The decisions were made for me. It was easy tae follow the path I needed tae walk.”
“Aye, it can be hard making yer own way, but perhaps this is the best of it. Ye could hide here with me. They might believe ye were killed in the attack, or taken away by the vile bandit, never tae bee seen again.”
There was a hint of humor in his voice because this version of events wasn’t too far from the truth. Nora glanced towards Callan, feeling a strange desire to live the life he promised, to disappear, but would that be selfish of her? There were other things to consider too.
“Callan, I cannae live with a man who steals and attacks others.”
“Then I’ll stop. I’ll change for ye,” he said.
The words rushed out of his mouth. He looked at her earnestly, his green eyes more captivating than the fire that blazed beside them. She studied the angle of his nose, the shape of his lips. Why was he so attractive? Why was she so unbalanced when they were close?
“Did ye promise tae change for Alison?”
Callan drew back. Surprise etched his face. “Alison? What hae she got tae dae with anything?”
“I saw the two of ye taegether.”
“Alison dinnae mean anything tae me. Nae like ye.”
“And what dae I mean tae ye?”
“A second chance. Hope. Something I dinnae quite understand yet, but something I want more than anything else. We can hae a life here, a life that’s better than whatever awaits ye with MacPherson, and one that’s better for me than being alone.
Let the Highlands deal with MacPherson. The world hae taken enough from us already.
Maybe it’s time tae take something for ourselves.
But ye hae tae choose this, Nora. Are ye brave enough tae make the choice? ”
Nora knew he was goading her. Amber light flickered across his face.
The problem was that the life he promised was appealing.
It seemed like a dream to shrug every responsibility aside and finally live for herself instead of her clan.
Callan’s words had the ring of truth to them as well.
How could she be certain that MacPherson would even help her clan?
The fire seemed to be climbing higher and higher until it enveloped her completely. She was engulfed by a storm, and she kissed Callan again.
This time it was a hungry kiss, a passionate one.
She ran her hands through his hair and moaned deeply, loving his animalistic grunts and the way his hands squeezed her waist. Her body responded to him, aching and yearning, her legs already parting.
He pulled her close so that she was sitting on his lap.
He grabbed her dress and lifted it over her head, revealing her naked flesh.
It glowed in the fire. There was a look of awe on his face, as though he was trapped in a blissful illusion.
Nora arched her back as his powerful, strong hands roamed around her supple skin.
They clamped around her pert, full breasts, sinking into the soft skin.
As he dragged his thumb across her nipple it hardened and a rush of pleasure swept across her chest. Her skin became flushed and her heart beat rapidly.