Chapter 13
13
S he grumbles to herself under her breath, her words incoherent. The woman steps out into the oasis, anxiously pacing around the sparkling pond of crystal-clear water while rubbing at her temples.
“Damn it! Why am I such a fool?”
I hastily throw on what little remains of my clothes. My outer robe has been torn to shreds, and my tunic and pants are heavily stained with crusted blood. My blood. It’s no wonder she stripped me bare.
“My lady?” I ask as I follow her around the edge of the water.
She doesn’t hear me, too absorbed in conversation with herself. She curses in a language I don’t quite understand—a dead dialect?—but I don’t need to know the words to feel her distress pulsating over our thread.
It leaves me nauseated, my guts tying themselves up in sickening knots, causing my stomach to lurch. Is this what she is feeling? Why is it that I can sense her emotions so clearly that I almost confuse them for my own?
“My lady?”
“What?” she snaps, turning on a point.
My Fated One is so spellbinding that I can hardly find any words. I fixate on the severe press of her rosebud lips, the curl of her long lashes framing her icy glare. I’m especially fascinated with the small beauty mark just below the corner of her left eye. I won’t do her the injustice of comparing her beauty to the stars, for she is far more radiant than anything in the Heavens, the earth, and the spaces between.
“I—I wanted to thank you,” I say, heart hammering in my ears. “For taking care of me. And rescuing me, too. That was you, was it not?”
She grinds her teeth, her fists clenched. When her lip curls back in a snarl, I can’t help but notice how her teeth are the slightest degree sharper than most humans’. She looks terribly upset. “You… need to go,” she says, shoulders trembling with tension. There’s a note of hesitation in her tone, but force in her words nonetheless. “Right now! As far as your legs can carry you.”
“As far as my legs can…” I shake my head. “But we’re in the middle of the Western Wastelands. I’ll certainly die of thirst before I make my way home. And I have so many questions, besides.”
“Not my problem.”
“My name is Sai,” I say quickly with a hand over my heart, desperate to have her hear me. “Might I know your name?”
Her hands fly to her hair. Instead of answering me, she returns to her agitated pacing. “Bringing you here was a mistake.”
I follow without hesitation. “All I want is your name. Is that so much to ask? I would very much like to know it, so that I might thank you properly.”
“And I would very much like for you to piss off.”
“I’ll remind you that it was your choice to strand me here, my radiant sunshine.”
She whips around, one finger pointed at me like a dagger. “Do not call me that, unless you have a death wish.”
I beam at the glimmer of her gorgeous eyes in her frown. Even angry, she’s the most beguiling creature who ever breathed. Her words sit low in her throat, but I’m confident her threat is an empty one. Again, why go through the trouble of saving me—thrice now—just to do me in?
“But I don’t have anything else to call you, my succulent pork dumpling. Unless you bestow upon me your name?”
“If you call me by one more nickname, I’ll bite your face off.”
“If it should please you, my lady, I wholeheartedly give my consent.” I bend forward slightly. “Here, now you can reach it better.”
She presses her hand to my face and pushes me away forcefully. “I should have left you to die.”
“You wound me, my mooncake—”
This time, she shoves me straight into the pond.
My whole body plunges beneath the surface of the water. My skin is immediately cooled by the plunge, but it’s far from relaxing.
Instinct tells me to panic. My limbs flail about uselessly as I sink like a boulder. I accidentally inhale water, and a burst of adrenaline rushes through my veins. An unfortunate tumble into a stream when I was a child ensured my ever-present fear of deep water.
And yet the water is so clear and pure that I can see the very bottom, sunlight dancing over the gray rocks beneath my feet. It’s a welcome sensation against the hot desert sun, colorful pupfish swimming about in small schools between the ribbonlike blades of underwater grass.
I once again get a flash of something across my mind’s eye. It feels too real to be a daydream, but too spectacular to be a memory. Clear as day, I see a serpentlike dragon with shimmering blue scales swimming around me. It’s much smaller than the green one I have come to know, youthful in its movements as it joyfully chases its own tail.
When I blink, it’s gone. Nothing more than a vision.
A hand breaks the water’s surface. I’m dragged up for air.
“What are you doing?” my Fated One shouts. “Are you trying to drown yourself, you idiot?”
“You’re the one who pushed me!” I cough around a deep gasp for air, hacking up water.
She shakes her head and walks away as I climb out, my clothes fully soaked. An effective way to wash the blood out, I suppose. I pull my tunic off and wring it out, sunshine beating down on my skin. In this heat, I’ll be dry within a few minutes.
“Why are you always such a pain?” she mutters.
“Always?” I echo. “What do you mean by that? You’ve just met me.”
She pauses on the other side of the pond, casting me a look that is equal parts anger and… grief? “Never mind. Please, just go .”
Anxiety turns my palms clammy. How can I possibly go, now that I’ve finally met my Fated One? Does she not feel what I feel, this inexplicable pull?
Why help me when she seems to want nothing to do with me?
I purse my lips, swallowing down what little blood remains coated on my teeth. I don’t believe her words. They’re an attempt to put distance between us, but why? The notch between her brows signals something else—vulnerability, or even fear.
“Fine. If you wish me gone, so be it,” I say slowly, “but only once you answer my questions.”
The woman sighs. “Fine. But make it quick.”
I pause for a moment, unsure where to begin.
“I thought I was a dead man,” I say. “What was that you gave to me earlier?”
“It was blood. My blood. It has… healing properties.”
“How’s that possible? Unless you’re… part dragon?” I feel ridiculous asking such a question aloud, yet here I am, sounding like a madman.
“I’m not part dragon,” she utters, her tone indignant. “I am a dragon. I have the ability to transform.”
“How?”
“Just as the Gods may choose their form to suit their desires, I, too, can change on a whim.”
“You said before that you knew you were my Fated One. How?”
The woman shifts her weight from foot to foot. Her mouth opens for a moment before she closes it again. Even from across the water, I can see that she’s choosing her words carefully. “Next question,” she says.
I stride around the edge of the water and approach her cautiously. “Please, answer me.”
“I can see them, too.”
My brows knit together. I now have more questions than I started with. “The threads? How is that possible?”
“It’s complicated.”
“I’m willing to listen.”
“Even if you do, it will do you no good.”
“And why is that?”
“Because…” She trails off, her eyes glassy with the threat of tears.
I take a step closer, my fingers itching to touch. There’s barely a pace between us now, the tension thick and heavy in the air. I reach up slowly and carefully, genuinely surprised when she allows me to graze her cheek with the back of my hand. It’s fleeting, but electric.
Now I know exactly what all my customers have experienced the first time I bring them to their Fated Ones. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. My skin tingles with a pleasant warmth, my soul is wrapped in a restful peace. It’s the same feeling I get when I lay my weary head on my pillow at night, soothing and comfortable and secure.
And then she pulls away, and I’m adrift once more.
“You can see our thread, then?” I ask hastily.
“Yes.”
“Why is it gray?”
She stares at me, then exhales deeply before her eyes flick away. She’s still being very deliberate with her words; I can’t say that I like it.
“I don’t know,” she replies.
“But you must have some idea—”
“Enough questions,” she says. “You’ll get no more answers from me.”
“Just one more,” I barter. “And I’ll let the issue rest.”
“What is it?”
“What’s your name, my lady? At the very least, please grant me that.”
She glares at me, but the anger from behind her eyes is barely there anymore. Her resolve is dwindling. “You already know it,” is her vague reply.
I stare at her, my mind reeling. How could I already know her name?
Then it hits me out of nowhere, breaking free from a locked-away box in the back of my skull.
I see that brilliant green and her smile and fragments of our lives together. I hear her voice and her wordless songs and the rush of wind howling past my ears. I smell the ocean spray and the damp springtime earth after heavy rains.
When I look at her, I swear I can hear my own voice—older and rougher somehow—calling out her name.
“Jyn,” I say without meaning to.
She nods but doesn’t seem nearly as elated as I am. Instead, she begins to cry.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you. If I’ve offended you in some way—”
She wipes at her eyes, her deep-seated anguish magically seeping through our connection. “Enough,” she snaps, trudging off toward the shade of the rocky overhang. “Leave me be.”
I have no plans to do such a thing. If I can convince Jyn to let me stay—just for a little while longer—perhaps she’ll open up, even a little. Looking around, I formulate a loose plan.
“Very well,” I say with my best feigned huff. “If you wish me gone, then say no more. Have a pleasant rest of your day.”
I set off due… east? The sun is blazing hot, and I have no water or other necessary supplies. There’s a good chance that I’ll be fried to a crisp within an hour or two, should I continue in this direction. I push past the last of the leafy green oasis and step out onto the hot sand, scorching the bottoms of my feet.
“Not that way!” Jyn shouts after me.
“This way, then?” I head in the opposite direction and try again. This time, she lets me get half a li out before stomping after me.
“No, you idiot!” she exclaims, grabbing me by the wrist.
“You know, you could just fly me out of here.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I need time to rest— argh! Stop talking. I’ll draw you a bloody map. You can stay the night and leave in the morning.”
I beam, pleased with my efforts. It’s not as long as I would like, but it’s a start. Being in Jyn’s presence is a much-needed relief after all the death and carnage I’ve witnessed since crossing the border.
“As you command, my lady.”