Chapter 26 Nazar #2
When they hit the bed, he pushes Kai onto his hands and knees, and the sight of him — all that pale skin, the vulnerable curve of his neck, the way he’s trembling slightly — makes Nazar pause.
This is what he wanted. What he’s been obsessing over for eighteen months. It is almost too much. He is so ready he’s afraid he’ll come right then.
He stretches him slowly, his touch gentle, almost reverent. “Okay?” he asks, his voice a rough whisper.
Kai just nods, his face buried in the pillows.
His hands skim along Kai’s sides, slow at first. His thumbs press into hip bones, firm enough to anchor him but not to hurt. Kai shivers. Nazar leans forward, chest brushing against Kai’s back, breath hot against his ear.
Nazar enters him, a careful push into the tight heat. He feels the muscles clench around him, and he stops, giving him a moment. “Kai. You okay?”
A muffled sound.
“Tell me,” he pants. “Tell me it’s okay.”
Kai nods again.
“Okay.”
He pushes a little deeper. The friction is incredible. Heat and resistance close around him, overwhelming. His fingers tighten on Kai’s hips without meaning to. He is losing his mind.
He pushes in a little deeper. His breath stutters. His pulse roars. “Say it,” he demands quietly. “Please.”
On the fourth attempt, the word finally comes, a ragged whisper against sheets. “Fine. Great. Just shut up, Rykov.”
Something inside Nazar breaks. This has never happened to him before. This overwhelming, desperate need to know, to be sure.
Nazar grips him harder and pushes forward in one smooth, unstoppable motion. Kai gasps— sharp, choked—his arms trembling as he braces himself. Nazar’s vision blurs for a second. Heat surges through him so fast it almost burns.
He finds a rhythm, hips rolling forward, each movement deeper, heavier. The sound of skin meeting skin fills the room. Kai’s breath comes in broken, uneven pulls, sometimes catching, sometimes turning into quiet, frustrated sounds he tries to swallow down.
Nazar leans over him, chest to his back now, one hand sliding up to wrap around Kai’s throat — not squeezing, just holding. Claiming. His mouth finds Kai’s shoulder, teeth scraping lightly against skin.
It’s too much. Too tight. Too hot. His control slips.
His thrusts become frantic, erratic. His body coils tight, and then snaps. He spills into Kai with a hoarse, guttural sound that tears out of him before he can stop it. His right leg shakes with the force of it.
His breathing slows. He realizes he’s still holding Kai against the bed. And that Kai hasn’t moved. He’s still tense. Still silent. And very clearly—he didn’t come.
Nazar pulls out and turns him onto his back. He needs to see his face. He enters him again, and this time he moves slow, a shallow, teasing rhythm.
Kai is flushed, his lips swollen, his eyes a hazy, dazed blue. “What are you doing?” he pants. “Move faster, Rykov.”
“You want me to go deeper?” Nazar murmurs, leaning down until their faces are inches apart. “Then say it.”
Kai’s pale face flares a darker red, but he stays stubbornly silent.
Nazar’s mouth twists into a sharp grin. He leans down and kisses him hard, his tongue plunging into his mouth. “I’m going to fuck your mouth too,” he rasps against his lips. “I want you fucked every way today.”
Kai moans, a soft sound that makes Nazar’s cock twitch inside him. He speeds up, just a little, a teasing rhythm designed to bring Kai to the edge. But Kai just sighs, his eyes closing.
“I dreamed about this,” Nazar says. “Especially about hitting your prostate. Wanna see how you’d take it. I watched hundreds of videos to figure it out. Never done it with guys before you.”
He lowers his head and bites into the side of Kai’s neck, leaving a sharp, red mark.
And that’s the last straw. Kai gasps, his body arching. He draws his knees up to his chest, his hands gripping his legs, opening himself up completely. Now Nazar can see everything—the way he fills Kai, the way his cock pounds that tight hole, the way Kai’s body takes him.
A dizzying surge of triumph floods Nazar. “That’s it,” he groans, voice thick with approval. “This is how I want to see you. Always.”
“Faster,” Kai begs. “Deeper. Please. P-please, Nazar.”
Nazar bites his lip, hard, and then he fucks him. Deeper. Faster. The bedframe knocks against the wall. “Anything you ask for, Kai,” he grunts. “You just have to ask. You know that. Right? You know that?”
Kai comes with a high, broken whimper, his body going rigid beneath him. The sight, the sound, sends Nazar over the edge. He follows moments later with a raw cry, releasing inside him.
Afterward, they lie tangled in sheets. The tension that’s been coiled in Nazar’s shoulders for months has finally loosened. He feels light.
Kai is warm against him, his breathing evening out. For a moment, Nazar thinks he might be falling asleep.
Then: “You know, that drop pass in the second period last week, the one against Tampa? That was genuinely brilliant. Audacious. Also kind of stupid. If Norskiy hadn’t bailed you out, you would’ve been a highlight reel for all the wrong reasons.”
Nazar grins, surprised into happiness by the casual way Kai is dissecting his gameplay. Like they’re teammates again. Like this is normal.
“You were watching?”
“I always watch. Even when I tell myself I won’t, I do.”
Something warm blooms in Nazar’s chest. He rolls onto his elbow, looking down at Kai — at his flushed face, his swollen mouth, the marks Nazar left on his neck.
“You begged me so well,” he says. It’s meant to be teasing, affectionate. A callback to how desperate they both were.
But the effect is catastrophic.
Kai’s face shutters. The warmth drains from his expression, replaced by something cold and distant. He sits up, pulling the sheet with him like armor.
“I have a flight in the morning.” His voice is flat, empty. “You should go.”
Nazar feels like he’s been doused in ice water. “What? Kai—”
“I said you should go.” Kai won’t look at him now. “This was—it’s late. You should go right now.”
The dismissal is so sudden, that Nazar can only stare. He’s being kicked out. Discarded. And he doesn’t even understand what he did wrong.
Pride surges up, hot and defensive. “Fine.”
He gets up, yanking on his jeans and shirt with jerky movements. His hands are shaking. He wants to say something cutting, something that will hurt Kai the way he’s been hurt. But the words won’t come.
He leaves without looking back, the way Kai always fucking does. The door closes behind him with a soft click that sounds like finality.
In the rental car, the leather cold against his bare back, Nazar sits in the dark and feels the pride evaporate. It leaves behind only regret.
He’d finally had him. For a few hours, he really had him. Kai had let him in — not just physically, but emotionally. They’d talked. Really talked. Kai had been open and vulnerable and everything Nazar didn’t know he needed.
And then Nazar had destroyed it with two thoughtless words.
You begged me so well.
Like it was a victory. Like he’d won something. Like reducing what they’d just shared to a power dynamic.
Kai doesn’t want to be reminded that he was vulnerable. Nazar knows this, he has seen how fiercely Kai guards that part of himself.
“Fuck,” Nazar says to the empty car. “Fuck.”
His phone is on the passenger seat. He could text. Could try to explain. Could apologize for being an emotionally stunted idiot who doesn’t know how to have a normal human interaction without sabotaging it.
But what would he even say? Sorry for making you feel weak when you let yourself want something? Sorry for being so bad at this that I destroy it every single time? Sorry that I’m obsessed with making you beg?
He starts the car and drives back to his hotel, replaying the whole night. The conversation in the kitchen. Kai’s admission about watching Nazar’s games. The way he’d opened up about visiting Halina, about being lonely.
The way he’d looked at Nazar afterward — trusting and vulnerable and something that might have been the beginning of hope.
All of it destroyed because Nazar couldn’t resist the urge to assert dominance or prove something or whatever psychological clusterfuck was happening in his brain.
By the time he reaches his hotel, it’s after five AM. The lobby is empty except for a night clerk who doesn’t look up from her phone as Nazar passes.
In his room, he strips off his clothes and stands under a scalding shower, trying to wash away the lingering scent of Kai’s and the memory of how good it felt to be trusted with something precious.
He’d finally figured out what he wanted. What he needed. And in the space of two words, he’d lost it.
Derek’s voice echoes in his head, asking him if he’s learned anything. If he’s capable of having something good without destroying it.