Chapter 7
Knut couldn’t sit still. Edith was back. And things were about to get much worse for her. He felt the need to physically run the indignation out of his body. Regardless of the late hour, he put on his hat and coat and left his apartment.
In the hallway, the nosy neighbor was lurking. “Going out again, Lieutenant Hesse?”
He owed Frau Stenzel no explanation, but to avoid bad blood, he politely replied, “An urgent official matter.” And, since a question as to the exact nature of the official matter clearly lay ready on her tongue, he added, “Top secret.”
The neighbor knew, of course, that he worked for the Abwehr, and wasn’t allowed to reveal any details.
This wasn’t entirely true. Until recently he had carried out administrative duties in the logistics section.
Officially, that was still the case, but now he was working more closely with Hans von Dohnanyi.
But secret and subversive or not, he felt no desire to reveal his duty roster to this gossipmonger.
However, Frau Stenzel wasn’t easily fobbed off.
She regarded it as her personal mission to know everything about everyone in the building, presumably so she could report any irregularities, genuine or imagined, to the Gestapo posthaste.
“What a shame. Is that why your lady friend left in such a hurry?”
He briefly toyed with the idea of letting the neighbor believe Edith was his lover, then thought better of it. “That was my sister. And yes, she is used to my service to the fatherland always coming first. Please excuse me, this matter is very urgent.”
Frau Stenzel stepped aside, her sour smile proof enough that she would have liked to interrogate him further about Edith. “That nice young man earlier – I suppose he works in your department, too.”
“Top secret, Frau Stenzel.” Knut couldn’t escape fast enough.
On an appropriate occasion, he would have to provide the neighbor with a credible explanation of why Bernd would be visiting more often.
His heart began to beat faster just at the thought.
After their first kiss a few weeks ago at the S-Bahn station, everything had moved very quickly.
Knut had truly found his other half, his soulmate, his best friend and counselor, his partner and lover.
A warm feeling of happiness spread through him.
He decided he must visit Bernd and tell him about Edith and Julius’ terrible experiences.
About forty-five minutes later, he was standing in front of the impressive villa belonging to Bernd’s parents.
Heinz Ruben was a wealthy industrialist who had struck an advantageous arrangement with the Nazis, profiting handsomely from his war production.
Bernd lived in a two-bedroom apartment on the ground floor of the villa.
So far, Knut had never been inside. Bernd’s parents must never find out about their son’s homosexuality.
They would have thrown him out of the house, or even denounced him, just as Knut’s own parents would have done. He rang the bell, and Bernd, who had exchanged his uniform for a more comfortable dark blue suit, opened the door.
“What are you doing here? Has something happened?” he asked with a horrified expression.
Knut nodded wordlessly.
“Come in.” Bernd gestured to his cozy living room. “Make yourself comfortable. I’ll prepare us a hot toddy.”
A few minutes later, he returned to the living room with two steaming mugs and placed them on the coffee table.
“That was my sister Edith earlier.”
“I know, you introduced us.”
“Sorry. I’m totally out of sorts.” Knut had completely forgotten that Bernd had been with him when Edith showed up so unexpectedly.
“You told me she emigrated. Why is she back in Berlin?” Bernd sipped at his toddy, looking at Knut with curiosity.
Knut ran his hand through his close-cropped hair. “They were turned away at the Swiss border. Because of the new edict.”
“Oh no. What happened?” Bernd was visibly shaken, even though he had only met Edith briefly for the first time that day.
“Apparently, they had trouble on the journey, and it took over a week before they finally reached the border. Once they got there, they were refused exit on the German side. They would have let Edith pass, but not her husband.”
“And she didn’t want to leave him alone.” Bernd twirled his moustache. “Because the only thing that protects him from deportation is his marriage to her.”
“Yes. You have no idea what they’ve had to endure so far. Life in Germany has become hell for them.”
“I can imagine.” Ever since Bernd had seen Dohnanyi’s dossier on the government’s anti-Semitic measures, he had told Knut one horror story after another.
“You know it’s only going to get worse. Hitler will never miraculously change his mind and regard Jews as human beings.
What can I do?” Even though he knew nothing of Hitler’s plans to solve the Jewish question, Knut was fully aware they didn’t bode well.
Anyone who thought the current situation was bad would soon realize that it could get much worse.
Bernd took a deep breath. “Not much, I’m afraid. Apart from offering your sister moral support and putting groceries her way every now and then.”
“I gave her the office phone number just in case.” Admittedly, neither Edith nor Julius were under immediate threat of deportation. Nonetheless, he realized with frightening clarity the hopelessness of their situation. Julius was doomed and Edith with him. Neither of them was safe in the Reich.
“That’s a good first step. Keep an eye on her, meet up with her regularly, and help with little things like ration cards. Then you can only hope that this is all over soon.”
“That would be nice.” Knut had the impression Bernd knew more than he was telling. But he didn’t probe, even though they trusted one another completely. When dealing with secrets, best to have as few co-conspirators as possible.
They sat silently for a while, sipping their toddies, until Knut spoke again.
“I told Edith to make the best of her situation.” He looked deep into Bernd’s eyes.
“None of us knows how long we’ll be on this earth, especially not while there’s a war raging.
We have to live every day to the fullest and enjoy the time we have left, no matter how much or little we’re given. ”
“Well said. We’ll keep to that from now on.” Bernd took him in his arms and kissed him. Knut closed his eyes – all thoughts of war, suffering and horror washed away.
Love was the only thing in the world that mattered.
Hours later, as they snuggled next to each other, Knut mused, “I feel that I need to do more. It’s been weeks since I talked to Dohnanyi, but I have yet to do anything useful.”
“You have to be patient.” Bernd squeezed his hand. “Believe me, I know the feeling. Collecting information about the atrocities committed against our Jewish compatriots isn’t exactly world-changing either.”
“Isn’t there anything more hands-on we could do?” The urgency to resist the regime burnt even brighter since Edith had returned to Germany.
“I’m not sure…” Bernd paused. “There are plenty of secretive meetings, planning and talking. Most of it is geared toward a possible coup, and how to secure power after the event.”
“Which is all fine, but it doesn’t help to alleviate the pain of the persecuted people right now.” A slow desperation seeped into Knut’s bones, since there was so much he wished to do and so little he actually did.
Bernd stroked his hand, but didn’t answer. After a long silence, he asked, “Do you have anything in mind?”
“Not really, except that I’ve heard the Abwehr has on occasions placed individual Jews under its protection and saved them from deportation.”
“That’s true. Mostly on Admiral Canaris’ request, some Jews have been labeled as essential workers and saved from the clutches of the Gestapo at the last moment.”
“Couldn’t we do this on a broader scale?”
Bernd looked at him. “I’ll need a glass of wine for this discussion.”
“Sounds like a plan.” Knut grinned. They dressed and he settled on the sofa, while Bernd climbed down into his father’s wine cellar and returned with a bottle of expensive French Bordeaux.
“It tastes exquisite, you’ll see.” Bernd twirled the ruby red liquid in the elegant wine glass.
For a fleeting moment, Knut felt inferior. He came from a middle-class family, his father a retired elementary school director, whereas Bernd’s family belonged to the top ten thousand in Berlin.
Bernd seemed to have noticed, because he set the glass down on the table. “I love you the way you are. There’s nothing wrong with not being a connoisseur of wines. I’d rather my family shared my political opinions, even if that meant we’d be dirt poor.”
Warmth spread through Knut’s heart. “I still cannot believe that I found you. You’re such a wonderful man.”
“As are you.” Bernd stroked his hand over Knut’s cheek and kissed him intensely, before he took up his glass again. “We wanted to brainstorm on ways to resist the regime.”
“Right, you distracted me.” Knut smiled happily. “You were going to tell me about Admiral Canaris’ orders to deem certain Jews as essential workers.”
“Unfortunately it’s a measure that can only be used occasionally, or the Gestapo will become suspicious.”
“We must find a way to spirit away Jews to a safe country.” Knut’s enthusiasm for the just cause took over. “We could equip them with false papers.”
Bernd shook his head. “That’s way too risky. If the Gestapo ever finds out that the Abwehr is issuing false papers, they’ll take over the entire organization.”
“Right.” Knut racked his brain. Bernd was right. They couldn’t risk the entire operation going up in flames. That would cause so much more damage. “Then we’ll do it on a personal level. We can arrange for safe hiding places, perhaps train tickets, anything.”
“I guess that’s a good start. During my next meeting with Eberhard Lange, I’ll put my feelers out. He must know many people in dire need,” Bernd offered.
“That’s a fantastic idea. Even if we can only save one single person, I’m determined to do everything in my power.”
“Let’s toast to our mission,” Bernd suggested. They raised their glasses and Knut said, “To saving as many lives as we can!”