Chapter 15
Henry
“You’re killing me, Smalls.”
“Quoting The Sandlot? It must be bad,” Drew said with a laugh.
After he got off the phone, we moved into the kitchen to make breakfast before running the errands that I needed to get done that day.
Every time I brought up his new job, he had a deflection for me.
I didn’t understand why he wouldn’t want to talk about it.
I would’ve thought it was something he was proud of, but maybe not.
There might be something about it that I just wasn’t getting, but if he didn’t tell me about it, I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to know.
“I was hoping to hear more about your new job,” I said with a flourish as I set the plate of french toast in front of him before getting up to grab the forgotten maple syrup.
“Daddy, it’s not that I don’t want to talk about it.” He sighed.
He fiddled with the napkin he’d put in his lap, rolling it over and over between his fingers. I let him sit with it for a moment before saying anything else.
“Honestly, it kind of seems that way. You didn’t even mention it at dinner last night.”
Drew nodded but kept his comments to himself. As much as I racked my brain, I couldn’t understand why it wasn’t something to celebrate.
“It feels small, and I hate that I’m excited about it.”
Whatever I thought he was going to say, that possibility hadn’t crossed my mind.
“Can you explain what you mean?” I kept my voice calm, like it was a deposition with a spooked witness. Half the time, getting information was about how one asked.
“I had such a good time with Ben at the park and then the aquarium with the other kids. I don’t wanna sound vain, but I was really good at it.
Like juggling them and keeping them entertained and keeping them wrangled.
Then afterward, when we were at the playground and then the movie part of it, I did a really good job, but… ”
“The director must’ve thought so too because she offered you the position.”
“Yeah. She actually offered it to me before the movie, but still, she did. Ever since I accepted it, I got to thinking about something that Jonathan—and actually, even before him—said when I brought up getting a job.”
“What was that?”
“It was… Oh my God, I don’t even know how to explain it.
The word that hurt the most was inconsequential.
I don’t even remember what job it was. I think it was a garden center or something.
Not even taking care of the plants because I’m not that good at that, but just working the register.
They said it was inconsequential, and that’s not true.
There’s nothing wrong with working for a living, no matter how much you get paid.
I know that, but it made me feel so small.
And now with you… I don’t want you to feel that way. ”
“And you think that I will?”
“I don’t want you to.”
“Sweetheart, it’s not exactly the same thing, but I think it’s great.
Kids love you. I saw the way Ben responded.
I’m not at all surprised that the other kids did too.
To be clear, I’m damn sure I couldn’t do that job.
I’d last about twenty minutes tops before those kids mutinied.
It’s a great opportunity for you to do something that you might love and be really good at. ”
“Do you think it’s beneath you?”
“Beneath me? Absolutely fucking not. I’m gonna be proud to have you by my side whether you work, stay at home, or volunteer. I’m good with any of it. And if you change your mind down the line, I’m good with that too.”
Drew stared at me for a minute without saying anything.
I could see the war going on between his head and his heart, and I tried to give him the space to resolve at least part of it.
When he explained his reasoning, it was obvious that it didn’t have much to do with me and everything to do with the men he’d been involved with over the last however many years.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Although—and this isn’t a criticism—how are you going to get to work?”
Ben’s daycare was several miles from Halo House, so walking wasn’t an option. If public transportation was an option, I’d be pleasantly surprised.
“There’s a bus stop about a mile away. I can walk to that, and the bus will get me to just under two miles away. Not great, but definitely close enough to walk.” Drew jutted his chin, daring me to argue with him.
“How long is the ride?”
“An hour, give or take.”
Shit. A mile to catch a bus, an hour-long ride, then another couple of miles on foot was one hell of a commute. A two-hour commute on top of the physical aspects of a forest school setup was a lot, and that didn’t account for bad weather or running late and missing the bus.
The Daddy in me wanted desperately to lay down the law and tell him it wasn’t a sustainable plan, but I knew that would crush him.
The way he sat in the chair across from me, his shoulders hunched as he waited for the blowback, forced me to keep my mouth shut.
I wanted to fix it, but I wasn’t sure how to broach it.
Rather than screw it up now, I made the executive decision to put it aside until I had a little more time to figure it out.
“I think it’s fantastic and deserves a celebration.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yes. The oil change still has to happen, but if you’re doing all that walking and forest rangering with kiddos, you need a proper pair of shoes, and I’m claiming the right to buy them for you as a present.”
“You don’t need to do that.”
“I want to do it and I will because I’m the Daddy.”
“And you said so?”
“It’s my Daddy privilege,” I said with a firm nod. “Good thing french toast isn’t terrible cold because we forgot to eat.”
“All right,” Drew answered before picking up his fork. “Eat. Errands. Shoes.”
Didn’t you say you were looking to hire someone to take Ben to daycare in the mornings?
Marc
Yeah, I’ve been too busy to find someone though.
I take that back. There was someone, but they bailed after a week.
Is your kid really that bad?
Probably.
So FYI, Drew got a job at Ben’s school…
Oh fuck yeah.
Do you think he’d be interested?
Either way, Ben has a serious case of hero worship for the guy.
I’m not sure, but I’ll mention it to him. If he’s interested, then I’ll have him text you.
Butter him up for me.
Tell him I pay well.
Do you pay well?
Yes.
Wait…does he have a car?
He will if he says yes.
Please convince him.
I knew single parent by choice would be hard, but OMFG the logistics are a pain in the ass.
Pretty sure it’s a PITA regardless of choice.
Yeah, but I feel like a dumbass for complaining about it when I’m the one who decided to adopt on my own.
I’ll talk to him, but no promises.
You’re a lawyer.
Use your evil for good and talk him into it.
That doesn’t help your cause.
Convince him.
Think of the children.
Think of *ME*
“Everything okay?”
After the oil change, we stopped for lunch at another local taco place.
It had the second-best carne asada in the area but was tops for the churros, and the tortillas were made fresh every day.
If I let myself come here every day, I’d die a chubby, happy man.
This place was owned by the cousin of the other taco place.
After ordering, we wound our way through colorful cut-outs made of tissue paper and sat at a bistro table near a small fountain in the back. It likely wasn’t intended to be a private place, but it almost felt like we were alone in the busy taqueria.
“Yeah, sorry. I was checking something with Marc.”
“Is Ben okay?”
The fact that Drew asked about him first made me smile. The kiddo, being the excellent judge of character that kids often were, had adored Drew at first sight.
“Yeah, he’s fine. Marc mentioned the other day that he needed to hire someone to take Ben to preschool in the morning.”
Drew immediately perked up when I asked if he’d be interested but then collapsed back into his slouch. “Ugh, I would be.”
“So that’s a yes?”
“I mean… Who wouldn’t want to hang out with Ben? He’s cool, but I’m pretty sure his dad didn’t mean taking him on the bus for hours.”
Ugh. Seeing the light leave his eyes was an absolute punch in the gut.
“You have a license though?”
“Yeah, but without a car, I don’t even get to brag about my no-ticket record.”
The self-deprecating laugh was brittle.
“Then it’s settled. You’ve got yourself a job. Marc said he pays well, but he didn’t say exactly how much. I’d be happy to negotiate for you.” I paused before adding dramatically, “You can tell him to call your lawyer about the terms. We’ll drive a hard bargain.”
“Unfortunately, you won’t be able to practice your lawyering skills to fleece your own brother. Bad Daddy. I don’t own a car and, uh, I’m not likely to be buying one anytime soon.”
“That’s fine. You can borrow mine.”
“You drive yours to work.”
“No, I mean the one we’re going to buy.”
“We’re not.”
“I am.”
“You can’t buy me a car.”
“I am.”
“But…but…but you can’t.”
“I can. However, I’m not a monster. We can argue about the trim if it’ll make you feel better.”
“Do I have a choice in this?”
“About you having reliable transportation to a job you’re going to be kick-ass at? No. But the color is definitely on the table.”
“You’re not going to let this go, are you?”
“Not even a little.”
“Daddy…”
“I’d prefer to put you on the title too, but I’m not sure you’d let me.”
“No, I wouldn’t.”
“Great! Then we agree you’ll be driving my car.”