Chapter 5
“I’m not going to die,” Muriel said to Kyle. Her soon-to-be stepbrother stood holding two surfboards in his arms.
“You’re totally going to wipeout,” Kyle said, shaking his head. “Let me go with you. It’s not safe to take Sadie when you don’t even know what you’re doing yourself.”
“Are you serious right now?” Muriel couldn’t believe this teenager was giving her a hard time. “I’m your elder.”
“Exactly. You’re going to get hurt,” Kyle said. “I’ve seen your mom and aunt swim.”
“My mom is a very good swimmer,” Muriel said. They had been named after their mother’s love of all things aquatic. Cora and Muriel, the sea goddesses of inland Massachusetts.
“In a pool,” Kyle said. “The water is very different out there. Besides, you don’t even have a wet suit.”
“Sadie’s teacher’s going to be there,” Muriel said. “Mr. Abbott.”
“Oh, Mr. Abbott, now I get why you want to go.” Kyle gave her a little nod.
“It’s not like that.” Muriel changed the subject. “Sadie came into the store all sad because she was left out by her friends and I—” She stumbled through her words.
“Look at you blush,” Kyle said and then laughed at her.
“Then come with us,” Muriel said, hoping he’d agree. “You could bring your girlfriend.”
Kyle hesitated. “I don’t think Brianna’s going to want to come.”
“What do you mean?” she asked. She had noticed Kyle hadn’t been attached to his girlfriend like usual. “Is everything alright?”
He shrugged. “She’s always busy lately.”
Muriel should be the last person talking about relationships. What would she say at this point? She remembered being “busy” during the summer after graduation. So many big changes made things hard, especially with high school sweethearts. “Then let her be busy and get busy yourself.”
“What?” Kyle looked as confused as Muriel was about the advice she kept throwing out into the universe, but here she was again.
“You’re all about to leave for college and start a new chapter in your lives, and I’m sure she’s trying to deal with it in her own way,” Muriel said as Zack popped into her head. “Being busy may help her feel in control and make sense of these new changes. I’m sure she’ll find time for you when she’s figured things out. But in the meantime, don’t sit around waiting for her.”
Muriel did know she was better off in Blueberry Bay than sitting in her stuffy apartment bedroom, waiting for her roommates to leave, wondering if Zack was going out with her friends without her, and spiraling even more. Maybe it was the social media sites she focused her attention on, hoping and praying she’d find some sort of sign he still loved her.
Let him go, she thought to herself.
“Are you coming tonight?” Kyle asked.
“What’s tonight?”
Kyle looked at her like she had four heads. “Dinner with the whole gang.”
“Yes, of course,” she said to him, thinking about how strange it was that this eighteen-year-old boy who she sort of knew was sort of part of her family and wondered what would happen if her mom and Quinn were to break up. Would Kyle no longer be included? Like her friends did to her?
“Are you cool with my mom and your dad?” Muriel asked. Since his mother died, it might be harder for him.
“Of course not,” he said seriously and Muriel’s heart dropped. But then a huge grin grew across his face, and he started chuckling. “You should’ve seen your face.”
“I’m cool with it,” Muriel said. Then she asked something she hoped wasn’t inappropriate. “Do you think your mom would’ve liked my mom?”
Kyle looked up as he contemplated his answer. “I think she’s exactly who’d she want for my dad.”
Muriel smiled at this. “So, surfing? Will you lend me your boards for Sadie and me?” She clasped her hands together in prayer.
“I guess I have to say yes,” Kyle teased. He passed the surfboards to her. “Let me ask some friends if they have some wet suits you could borrow.”
“These are huge.” She didn’t realize the surfboards would be that long. They were taller than her by a lot.
“They’re longboards,” Kyle said. “You want to have as much board as possible at this point.”
She looked at the big board. “Wasn’t Jaws filmed in the Atlantic?”
“In the Cape,” Kyle said as though that really mattered, but she doubted him. “You’re more likely to be stung by a jellyfish than anything.”
That sounded horrible, too. “Oh, great.”
“Mr. Abbott’s pretty cool,” Kyle said. “Isn’t he around your age?”
“Is he?” Muriel thought he looked a tad bit older than her, but she wouldn’t comment on her looking older than her actual age. Maybe that was why Zack didn’t want to marry her. Was she aging poorly? Would Kyle be honest if she asked him if she looked older?
Whoa.She stopped herself from spiraling even further in her head. Why couldn’t she just focus on one thing at a time?
“Is Ryan coming up this summer?” Kyle asked her.
“Usually, I’d say yes.” Muriel’s family before the divorce had been as tight-knit as they came. Sunday dinners every week. Holidays spent together always. They never missed celebrations like birthdays and anniversaries or graduations. Even during college, Muriel would make it home once a month at least. But since the divorce, holidays and birthdays were different. Her siblings don’t make the effort they once had. “But it depends on his schedule.”
“Let me just put these in my truck and I’ll drive us all to the beach,” Kyle said, picking the surfboards up, as she was barely hanging onto them.
Just as Kyle left the garage, Cora called.
“I know, I know,” Cora said into the phone. “I just talked to Mom this morning.”
“Were you going to text me back?” Muriel said, slightly annoyed. “Can you stay longer than the weekend?”
“I’m scheduled for a ton of hours at the restaurant,” Cora said back with the same irritated voice Muriel had. “It was hard enough to come tonight.”
Muriel rolled her eyes at her sister’s exaggeration. “I just miss you.”
“I miss you, too.” Cora stayed quiet for a moment, then said, “It’s just weird. You know? Seeing Mom with another man. And before you give me a hard time, I know Quinn is great for Mom and he makes her happy,” Cora said, reasonably and without selfishness.
“It is a little weird,” Muriel agreed. “I mean, I never even thought Mom and Dad would get a divorce.”
“Yeah, well, when your dad is a pig, you root for a nice guy to steal your mom’s heart,” Cora said.
“She really loves Quinn.” Muriel had spent most nights having dinner with the happy couple. “So I take it you haven’t heard from Dad either.”
“Oh, no, but he’s been golfing in Washington DC with Ryan,” Cora said harshly. She held the same feeling about their dad as Muriel did. “It’s like he forgot he had other children.”
“He went to DC?” Muriel was shocked. She had just talked to Ryan a few days ago and he hadn’t mentioned anything. “He saw Dad?”
“Yup,” Cora said. “And I guess Dad took a whole weekend to visit him.”
Muriel couldn’t keep the tears from forming and the sting angered her. She didn’t want to cry for that man. Not any longer. The pain of losing her family unit had been hard enough, even in her twenties. But to lose her father somehow because he had a better option out there killed her.
Always a daddy’s girl, she would follow him around the house and yard on the weekends as he did household chores. She’d beg him to spend any free time he had with her, which wasn’t much, even if that meant learning how to golf.
“It would be nice if he asked me to golf.” Muriel couldn’t hold back. “He never asks me to play golf. And you’re literally down the road from him in the city. When was the last time he took you out for dinner or even invited us to his house?”
“And…we weren’t invited to Britney’s birthday party.” Cora’s words hit Muriel like a punch in the gut.
“There was a birthday party?” Muriel’s heart plummeted. “Is he mad at us?”
“Muriel,” Cora sighed into the phone. “He’s not mad at us. He’s not inviting his first daughters because it makes her uncomfortable. I think he’s a jerk that deserves to live in his own narcissistic world.”
“We shouldn’t take it out on an innocent child,” Muriel said. She seriously wondered if her father’s daughter would ever become a sister to her in the same kind of sense she had with her other siblings. Sadly, she didn’t think so.
“Did I tell you how I ran into Rylie in Andover?” Cora said. This was unusual for Cora to bring up their stepmother.
“What were you doing in Andover?” Muriel asked.
“Grandpop wanted me to check on the house,” Cora said. “And she was eating out with friends and acted like she didn’t even know me.”
When their father had first left their mother, he seemed to want to include them in his new life, but now…he barely acted like he had another family.
“Hey, Muriel, you ready?” Kyle called into the garage from his truck.
“Cora, I need to go.” Muriel didn’t need to keep talking in circles about their father. She’d had her heart broken enough times to know the ending by now. They all leave in the end.
She looked out at Kyle’s truck, the surfboards hanging out of the bed. She wondered what Zack was doing.
The whole way to the beach she second guessed the surfing adventure, after Kyle’s warning. Maybe she’d stay on dry land and out of the waters at this point. It felt safer than dealing with the unpredictability of the ocean.