Chapter Ten
ADAM
I rolled over onto my back with a huff of frustration. I’d been lying in bed for over an hour, unable to fall asleep because I couldn’t stop thinking about Lyla.
Jesus.
Images of her sprawled out in the tub, tits on full display, flashed through my mind for the millionth time. It wasn’t even the image of her half-naked body that was burned into my brain. No, it was her little moan of pleasure as I washed her hair that kept playing on repeat in my head.
And I was dying to make her do it again.
Preferably with my tongue, or my hand. Or better yet, as I plowed into her soft, wet pussy.
My dick twitched, obviously loving that idea. I closed my eyes, letting my hand disappear under the waistband of my shorts. My cock was painfully hard as I gripped it and ran my hand up and down the shaft.
Was I really going to jerk off to thoughts of Lyla?
I scoffed. Although, if I was being honest, it wasn’t like it would be the first time.
She was supposed to be just a friend. So why couldn’t I stop thinking about her as more?
I knew all the reasons we couldn’t—or shouldn’t—go there, but it didn’t stop me from wanting it. And fuck did I want it. So bad. And I had no idea what to do with that realization.
It was probably a good thing I had to go back to work. Even though I wanted to be here with her, I needed some space before I did or said something I couldn’t take back.
I continued to stroke myself as I imagined walking into her room and climbing under the blankets, pulling her into my arms. I’d kiss and touch her until I could hear her sweet little moans again.
I moved my hand faster as I thought about how I would slowly slide inside her.
How she would beg for me to thrust into her. Harder. Faster.
Dammit dammit dammit. This was so wrong. I shouldn’t be thinking about any of this, but I couldn’t seem to stop either.
“Fuuuuck,” I gritted out as the force of my orgasm tore through me.
And that was it. I was totally fucked. Because I thought relieving some of the tension would help me stop thinking about her, but all it did was welcome more dirty thoughts into my head.
I got up and took a cold shower, hoping that would help. But the problem wasn’t just sexual. I wanted to hold her in my arms, kiss her, spend every waking moment with her. I wanted to be more than just her friend. The guys were right—I was in complete denial, and I had no idea what to do.
But what I did know was that I couldn’t keep pretending I only wanted to be her friend.
I cleared the top step of the firehouse and glanced around at the guys in the common area. “I need help getting out of the friend zone.”
Shocked expressions slowly morphed into smug smirks.
Zack jumped to his feet wearing a huge smile. “About time. I have so many ideas.”
I shook my head. “Not taking advice from the only other single guy here. I want to hear their opinions.” I pointed at Jay, Logan, and Seth.
Seth shrugged. “Give her a potted plant, or make her a playlist on your phone.”
Nope. Neither of those would work. “She’d kill a plant within days, and she already has complete control of my music when we’re together.”
I looked over at Jay with a raised brow. He’d been so opinionated about us, maybe he’d have a good idea.
“Just keep showing up, man.” Jay stood and patted me on the shoulder. “That’s what I did with Sarah.”
“She’s living with me.” I wasn’t sure I could show up any more than that.
“Just tell her.” Logan chuckled. “I learned with Izzy that communication is the key.”
That was probably the worst advice. What did he expect me to say… Hey, I jerked off thinking about you last night? I cringed. Yeah, that would go over great.
Zack crossed his arms over his chest and cocked a brow. “Want my help now?”
I sighed. His ideas couldn’t be any worse. “Fine. What do you got?”
“What made you change your mind?”
That was a good question. But it wasn’t that I changed my mind.
If I was being honest, deep down I’d wanted this since the moment she walked into my class over six months ago.
I’d worked hard to convince myself I was better for her as a friend and coworker, but ever since the accident—and having her in my space—I couldn’t keep ignoring how I truly felt.
The things she made me want that I never thought I did… It was a lot.
I gave him the simplest answer I could come up with. “I washed her hair for her and we had a moment.”
He pointed a finger in my direction. “Then that’s what you need. More of those moments of showing her you guys have chemistry that zings off the walls.” He dramatically threw his arms out to the sides. With a shrug he added, “Let her catch up to where you are.”
I hummed, thinking over what he said. That might actually work. “So you’re saying lean into those moments, help her see the attraction.”
He nodded and smiled. “And then once you’re pretty sure she’s on the same page, let one of those moments lead into more.”
I could do that.
I started to feel more confident I could pull this off. Until the nerves overflowed as I thought about the possibility that she might not want more.
“Stop that,” Zack scolded. “You won’t know until you try. Is she worth trying for?”
I stared at him, confident in my answer. “She’s worth everything.”
“Fuck yes, she is.” He walked over and placed his arm around my neck. “Because you’re crazy about her. It just took you a little bit to realize it.”
How the hell had they all seen it and I didn’t? None of that mattered now. I couldn’t change the past six months, and I wouldn’t even if I could. Being her friend had been exactly what we’d both needed. But now I wanted to show her we could be so much more.