Chapter 30
“Here we are, trying to be nice to you, and this is what you do?” Colt slams the front door shut and locks it before Nix finally sets me back on my feet. I whirl around, furious, my breaths coming in big, heaving sobs.
“Nice?” I scream, and that feels good. Hearing my voice echoing, seeing the way their eyes widen in surprise. Like they expected me to be this meek little thing, begging for the slightest scraps of kindness. They didn’t expect me to come back swinging.
“Well, yeah,” Colt finally responds once he shakes off his surprise. “What did you think today was about? We told you—”
“That’s not being nice. That’s just basic decency, you asshole,” I bark at him. Nix snorts, and I whirl on him next. “Sorry if I’m not falling on my knees and thanking you for your generosity, but nothing about treating me like a human being is generous. Why won’t you just let me go?”
When he shrugs, I want to scream again. “Because we can’t. And if you would grow up and see this for what it is, you would understand that.”
“Grow up? So what, that’s your way of telling me to suck it up and deal with it? Because I’m not going to do that. I need to get out of here, dammit. How much farther do you think he’s going to take this before he stops?”
This is the first time we’ve spoken about the things their father has them do to me.
It’s like my words have a magical effect.
Immediately, the fight goes out of both of them, and they look at the floor.
Like all their posturing and bullying drops away as soon as I speak frankly about their father’s monstrous behavior.
“You know it doesn’t work that way,” Colt murmurs, his gaze still lowered.
“That is bullshit. That’s what you’re letting yourself believe. And I’m sorry if that’s what he’s making you think, but it just isn’t true.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Nix growls. When he makes a move for me, I don’t flinch. I stand my ground, feet planted, chin lifted. It throws him off, but only for a moment. Then he bends, throwing me over his shoulder and charging up the stairs.
“Stop it!” Though I can’t exactly fight, not when he’s carrying me like this. I don’t need us both falling down the stairs. It’s only once we reach the hallway that I pummel his back and shoulders with both fists. I might as well be punching air for all the good it does.
Colt follows us, and soon the three of us are back in my room. Nix throws me onto the bed, but I scramble off in case he decides to throw himself on top of me.
That’s not what he has in mind. Instead, he thrusts a finger in my face, his own face beet red. “Now, you listen to me. You can leave as soon as this week is over. But you have to go through with this. You need to cooperate.”
I shouldn’t believe him. He’s never done anything but lie to me. But dammit, I want to hope. I still need to hope. “You mean to say you’re going to actually let me go? For real?”
“For real,” Colt confirms, nodding slowly. “And the week’s almost over. You don’t have much longer to go through this.”
“We won’t stop you from leaving. But he has to get what he wants first. That’s just how it is.” Nix is still breathing heavy, still angry, but at least he takes his finger out of my face. I have half a mind to bite it off. He’ll never stick it up anybody’s asshole again.
I turn my back on both of them since the sight of their faces disgusts me. “Leave me alone. I don’t want to see either of you.”
But instead of leaving, somebody touches my ass. Before I can swat his hand away, Nix asks, “What is this?”
I realize the picture must have slithered out of my pocket a little when I was struggling.
“Leave it!” It’s too late. He already has it, and now Colt is grabbing me, pinning my arms to my sides before reaching into my pocket to pull out the other half of the photo.
They stand next to each other, holding the two halves up and putting the picture back together the way I did when I first found it.
“Where the fuck did you get this?” Nix whispers, his eyes almost bulging.
Meanwhile, Colt doesn’t say a word. The muscles in his jaw jump and twitch, though.
The intensity coming off him is overwhelming.
“I found it downstairs.” I leave it there since I’m not exactly in the mood to be punished for snooping.
I don’t know why it took me so long to figure it out. Probably because I was too busy worrying about how I was going to get away. There wasn’t much room for anything else in my overheated mind, but now? “Was she your mom?” I whisper.
Neither of them says anything at first, and their silence is enough of a response.
If she wasn’t, they would say so right away.
From what I remember, I heard their mother died in a car accident before the family came to town to start over again.
I don’t know how long ago that was, but it clearly wasn’t long enough for the sight of her photo to keep a rush of emotion from blindsiding them.
“Yes,” Colt finally whispers. I don’t even think he’s blinked since he started looking at it. “That’s her.”
I have to wonder why James would tear her picture apart.
Maybe it was a moment of anger like he was venting his rage at her sudden death.
But he still couldn’t bring himself to let go of the photo.
Not that this in any way makes up for what he’s done or who he is, but it’s sort of a tool in a way.
It gives me an idea of the man he is, the real man inside.
Not a weapon, per se, but it never hurts to know the enemy.
Nix lowers his half of the picture but doesn’t let it go. “Don’t ever, ever mention her again. Not for any reason. Not to us, and definitely not to Dad. Do you understand?” Nothing about the way he says it is nasty or bullying, which might be why his words have such an impact.
“And you never found this,” Colt adds. “Got it?”
It must be their intensity that does it, or maybe it’s the way they are obviously shaken at the sight of her. Whatever the reason, it’s easy to agree. “Yeah, fine. I’ll never bring it up.”
With that, they leave me alone, and I drop to the bed before putting my head in my hands. That was my last chance. I know it. And since things have only escalated every day, I know it’s going to be worse tonight than it was last night.
If only I had gone out the window right away instead of searching the desk. I might have gotten away.
I know he’s home because I hear him down there. He’s looking forward to another night of fun. He sounds upbeat, even happy. I hate it so much to know he’s going to get what he wants. That’s the last thing he deserves.
The click of the lock doesn’t come as a surprise.
By the time Nix steps into my room, I’m showered and my legs are shaved, the whole nine yards.
I would hate to see what would happen if I kept James waiting, no matter how it kills me to know he’ll be pleased.
I’m not so stubborn that I would push his buttons on purpose.
Nix is holding a glass of wine, which he extends my way. “Trust me.”
Trust him? That’s a laugh. I take it to the bathroom and dump it down the sink before returning to him, glaring, daring him to say something. All I get is a disbelieving smirk and a slight shake of his head. “There’s no helping some people.”
“Whatever. You had the chance to help me earlier by letting me go, and you didn’t. Can we just get this over with?” I don’t feel half as defiant as I sound. Mouthing off and pretending this isn’t tearing me up inside are my only ways of getting a little of myself back.
We start down the stairs, and there’s no helping my curiosity. “What’s it going to be tonight?”
“Relax and do as you’re told,” he replies, his voice flat. Like he’s reading off a set of prepared remarks or something.
“Like I have a choice.”
“Just let us do what we’re going to do, and it will be over.
” I have to bite my lip to hold back all the many ugly, enraged thoughts running through my head.
I could push him down the stairs right now, couldn’t I?
We’re still far enough from the bottom that he might seriously hurt himself.
No, with my luck, he’d end up just fine.
And I would still have to go through with this, only it would be worse because he’d want to get back at me.
We go straight down to the basement, where James is already waiting in front of the TV.
Some sort of sports commentary plays, not that I care, but I’d rather watch it than have to acknowledge the man smiling at me now.
“Leni. I’m telling you, there’s nothing better to set eyes on after a long day at the office.
Knowing you’re here and we’re going to have all this fun together makes it possible for me to get through my day. ”
I don’t bother hiding my contempt as I stare at him. If he’s waiting for a response, he’ll be waiting a long time.
His smile fades away, revealing the true man beneath the facade. I guess the game isn’t as much fun if he knows he’s the only one playing. “Get her ready,” he grunts, turning back to the TV.
The coffee table is gone again, this time replaced by something else: a weight bench, smack dab in the center of the floor. Nix steps up behind me while I stare at the bench, wondering what it means. “Time to get undressed.”
Meanwhile, Colt comes walking down the stairs behind us, his tread heavy.
I look over my shoulder, and the sight of the vinyl straps he’s carrying makes my knees shake. They aren’t plain straps, either. There’s a cuff on either end of both of them.
When I don’t start taking my clothes off, Nix decides to help me, pulling the shirt over my head almost before I know what he’s doing. My thoughts are too jumbled, panic, disgust, and hatred all fighting for control of my brain.
I watch Colt arranging the straps under the bench, wrapping them around the metal legs before standing and finally looking at me.
“It’s okay,” Colt says in a whisper, barely audible over the TV. He unbuttons my jeans and lets them fall to the floor. “You’ll be fine. Just lie there, and we’ll get it over with. It’ll be done before you know it.”
He’s such a liar. I can’t bring myself to be grateful for this clumsy attempt at comforting me.
Nothing about this is fine or okay.
It wasn’t enough for James to humiliate me. Now, he needs to be sure I can’t move.