Chapter Thirty-One
Lulu
“You okay?” Lulu squeezed Xavi’s hand as they stood in front of the sliding entrance doors to Portland Airport.
“There’s still time to change your mind, you know?
Casey hasn’t left yet.” When they’d aired their intention to fly back to Buffalo instead of taking the FIAT, Noah’s brother-in-law had offered to drive the car back for them.
Apparently, the guy loved driving, and Aislin was okay to fly alone with the kids.
“We can still take the sardine can instead,” Lulu winked, bumping his shoulder against Xavi’s.
Xavi squeezed Lulu’s fingers back, a deep sigh leaving his chest. His dark coffee eyes locked onto Lulu’s, staring right into the depths of Lulu’s soul as always.
“Nah, if I ever wanna take you to Madrid,”—Xavi tipped his chin with that newfound determination that was just so fucking sexy in too many ways to count—“which I really fucking do, I’m gonna have to suck it up.”
A strangled groan fell from Lulu’s lips before he leaned in and hissed against Xavi’s ear. “Don’t ever, and I mean fucking ever, say suck in a public place again, mano.”
Xavi’s thick eyebrows shot up almost all the way to his hairline. “Why not? What’s wrong with suck? It’s just a verb. Suck.”
“Ugh, what the fuck did I just tell you? Don’t say it.” Lulu shifted on his feet, his jeans suddenly way too tight.
“Why not?”
Lulu hinted at his crotch, where the outline of his hardening dick was showing a little too clearly behind the light blue denim. Xavi’s gaze followed Lulu’s, then his eyes widened when they landed on Lulu’s dick that strained toward him.
“Oh,” Xavi blushed adorably, his mouth pressed into a cute O. “I see.”
“No shit, Sherlock! And so will the rest of the good folk of Portland, too, if you keep it up.”
“Sorry.” Xavi smirked, blinking his doe eyes innocently.
Xavi never used to be a smirker; always so serious, so solemn.
He never used to flirt or tease either, but Lulu guessed he’d created a monster, pouring more and more confidence into Xavi with every kiss or tender word spoken in the darkness when they lay naked and panting next to each other.
He loved it, though, this new version of Xavi, which Lulu suspected had always been there, just beneath the surface, dying to come out, but too afraid.
Now he was there, his Xavi, the real Xavi, less burdened by the past, braver and bolder and just altogether everything Lulu had ever wanted in a man.
“You’re not really sorry, are you?” Lulu scowled back.
Xavi’s blush deepened. “But you will be later, when I edge you with that purple tentacle dildo of yours until you cry and beg me for mercy. But there won’t be any.
Mercy.” Lulu spat the last word, a wicked smile playing along his lips.
“There will only be inches upon inches of fat, purple silicone tearing up your hole.”
“Fuuuck,” Xavi growled, then leaned in, resting his forehead against Lulu’s as his hips shot forward toward Lulu’s crotch. His breath coasted hot against Lulu’s mouth, their lips almost touching, as Xavi’s entire body seemed to vibrate with need.
“You like that, dontcha? It’s all you can think about now, ain’t it?” Lulu purred. He had a theory that if he could distract Xavi as much as possible today, it would be easier for Xavi to get through this ordeal and face his fear of flying.
“You drive me fucking crazy, baby, you know that, right?” Xavi’s lips hovered in front of Lulu’s, his breath smelling of coffee and the sugar-glazed donut he’d scarfed down in the cab, before feeding Lulu the last bit, his fingers all sugary and sticky, sending Lulu catapulting right back to the night before when he’d licked his own cum off Xavi’s thick fingers.
“Igualmente, oso. You drive me fucking crazy, too, but unless you want to have us arrested by the airport police according to Article 134, I suggest you better cool it, compadre. And fast.”
“Article 134?” Xavi wrapped his arms around Lulu’s waist, pulling him flush against him, revealing that Xavi, too, was hardening.
“Yes, indecent exposure.”
“Indecent…? How the fuck do you know that?” Xavi took a step back, his hands resting on Lulu’s hips.
“Never mind. I just do, okay?” Lulu did not feel the need to recount how he had, on a dare in a drunken stupor, streaked down a residential street in Allentown only to run into two police officers, one male, one female, who’d luckily let him go with a warning, referring to said article.
“Huh,” Xavi hummed. “Interesting.”
“No.” Lulu shook his head. “Not interesting. Not interesting at all.”
Xavi dug his fingers into Lulu’s hips, his eyes glimmering with mirth. “You know I’ll get the story out of you eventually, cisne. I have my ways.” Xavi paused, biting his lower lip. “Then again, you might just enjoy my ways a little too much.”
“You gotta stop. Now, oso. I’m gonna blow my fucking pants if you keep this up, and that won’t go down well when we go through security.
” He leaned in closer. “Not well at all, mano.” It was true.
He potentially could. These days, Lulu was latently horny 24/7, his arousal just lingering permanently beneath the surface, like an ever-present buzzing need, and it had everything to do with the guy currently staring at him all googly-eyed.
“Okay,” Xavi smiled, then leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss against Lulu’s chin.
“Let’s go.” Pulling Lulu after him, they moved through the sliding doors and entered a busy airport filled with Christmas travelers.
Xavi instantly froze next to him as he tightened his grip around Lulu’s fingers almost to the point of pain.
Tiny drops of sweat began beading along Xavi’s forehead, and his lips twisted into a grim line on his face.
“It’s okay.” Lulu dropped his voice into a reassuring coo. “It’ll be fine, mano. I’m here.” He brushed his thumb soothingly along Xavi’s knuckles. “I won’t let you go. I’m right here.” Xavi nodded, his gaze finding Lulu’s as it flickered nervously. “You’re my brave oso, aren’t you?”
“Don’t feel so brave.”
“You are. You’re braver than anyone I know.
And remember, we can leave at any time.” Xavi nodded, then took a deep inhale and started walking toward the screen listing the departures.
They didn’t have any luggage to check in, just two light backpacks since Casey had offered to drop off their luggage at Xavi’s place when he arrived in Buffalo in a few days.
Xavi’s place. Lulu couldn’t believe he was moving in with Xavi.
That Xavi had asked him. It was crazy how Lulu’s world had been turned upside down in the matter of a mere week.
The fact that Xavi loved him back—that he had always loved him back—still felt like a dream most of the time, like a bubble that could easily burst. But Lulu wouldn’t allow his fears to take over.
The fear that Xavi would change his mind when their trip ended, or that he would get enough of having Lulu in his space.
He wasn’t going to go there. He was going to be positive and hopeful and just embrace this new stage of their relationship and love Xavi back with everything he was.
No fear and no doubt. I deserve this, Lulu reminded himself.
I deserve him. It was the universe’s way of righting all the wrongs in Lulu’s life.
It was the universe’s way of saying, ‘I’m sorry I fucked up and gave you so much shit early in life, but I’m gonna try harder from now on. ’
“It’s Gate 37,” Xavi smiled nervously.
“Okay. Let’s get through security, and then we can get a drink or a bite to eat, okay?”
“I don’t think I can eat.” Xavi rubbed across his stomach, his skin already shades paler than usual.
“That’s okay. We can just grab some for the flight if you get hungry.”
“Okay.” Xavi’s lips quivered. “Thanks, baby.” Then a blush crept along his tawny skin, and Lulu knew what was coming from the solemness in Xavi’s eyes.
“I love you, cisne.” Fuck, it never got old.
Lulu’s chest expanded with happiness to the point that it felt like his heart was going to burst through his ribs.
“I love you, too,” he smiled back, his cheeks hot and his voice shaky. “So much.”
Security was busy, but eventually they made it through and found a small coffee shop where they sat down for a bland chicken sandwich and a coffee.
Xavi’s leg bounced underneath the table, his knee knocking against it from time to time, his hand wrapped around Lulu’s across the table.
Lulu carried on with the conversation about the most mundane things he could think of.
What did Xavi think his mami was gonna cook for Christmas dinner?
Was Manu gonna go overseas with Harriet or bring her along?
Did he think it would be expensive to hire a moving truck, or if it would be better to wait until Joe and Noah got back from their honeymoon?
Xavi nodded carefully, hummed his one-word answers, while chewing on his sandwich like it was his last meal.
“You want more?” Lulu asked when their plates were empty and their coffee was gone.
“Nah, I’m good.” Xavi smiled weakly, looking slightly queasy, his skin pale and clammy.
“Good. Ready?”
“Yeah, ready.” The words came out clipped and automatic. Xavi’s gaze flickered between the table and Lulu, then Gate 37 where people were starting to board to their right.
“You’ve got this, mano.”
“If you say so,” Xavi chuckled bitterly.
“I do. I believe in you. Always.”
“At least that makes one of us.”
“How can I not, mano, when you always believe in me, too?”