Chapter Twenty-Two
Cormal
Does he really believe I’m not going to hurt you?” Cormal asked hopefully.
Perian tilted his head back and forth. “I’m not totally sure. I think he’s got a lot to process. But he does know that I can bring you down before you get anywhere near me. I mean, assuming that I can duck a fireball.”
Kinan shifted uncertainly.
Perian said, “Not a threat. Just making sure everyone understands where we stand.”
“I did always wonder,” Cormal admitted. “How much you were restraining yourself.”
“Every time you surrounded me with a bunch of aroused Mage Warriors, you mean?”
He sounded a bit amused, thankfully, and Cormal groaned. “Surely, they couldn’t all find you attractive. You’re not that pretty.”
Perian laughed outright. Kinan turned to look at him incredulously.
“I prefer you?” Cormal tried, looking at Kinan.
Kinan snorted, finally, and seemed to relax a bit, thank goodness. He reached out to pat Cormal’s leg as best he could. “So smooth. Wow.”
“It’s definitely not my best skill,” Cormal conceded. He looked back at Perian. “I wish I’d listened better. I know I keep saying it, but I really am sorry I didn’t.”
Perian blew out a breath, nodded, and then admitted, “I never really liked you, you know.”
“Ah, so the feeling was mutual?”
Kinan’s elbow went through Cormal’s ribs as he hissed, “Cormal.”
But Perian just laughed. “Yeah, I don’t think we brought out the best in one another. But it means that I was never really invested, right? I mean, I was totally taken by surprise when you grabbed me, obviously, but it wasn’t quite unexpected. Brannal took it a lot harder.”
“I betrayed him, and I hurt you,” Cormal said with a sigh. “I’m pretty sure it doesn’t get any worse than that.”
Well. Had it gotten worse than that, Cormal would be dead.
“He needs some time to process,” Perian repeated with a nod.
“And you know, speaking entirely selfishly, although being banished and restricted to the estate is kind of awful, it has the benefit of giving me so much time with the man I love and ensuring he’s not doing a job that might kill him, so there’s that. ”
Cormal made a face. “He hates it?”
Perian glanced down for a moment and then up again. “He always assures me not?”
Cormal grimaced. “Fire and water, I didn’t mean—”
Perian shook his head. “No, I know you didn’t. And he picked me over everything else in his life. I will always cherish that. But he’s so good at protecting people.”
“And now he has you to protect,” Kinan pointed out.
Perian nodded, eyes a bit glassy. “Yeah, he’s super serious about that. We actually have training sessions all the time. And, you know, they’re not all about sex.”
Kinan laughed, and Cormal made a disgusted face so that Perian would laugh. Not that he particularly wanted to think about Brannal having sex with Perian, but it wasn’t like he hadn’t known that detail for months. Perian was not shy.
“I’m glad you’re happy,” Cormal told him. “I know we gave you no options.”
Kinan’s voice vibrated with anger. “It’s outrageous that you did so much good and we trapped you here.”
Cormal nodded, glancing at Kinan. “It is, really. I assume all of you haven’t been protesting more in order to ensure I didn’t snap and declare that we should just kill Perian instead?”
“Not just you,” Kinan said after a moment.
There was that. Cormal’s change of heart didn’t mean that the Queen had had a similar one. Could she really stand up to all of them? Or rather, would she?
“It’ll help if I don’t agree with her,” Cormal said.
“Probably,” Kinan agreed. “But she’s always made her own decisions.
And I suppose it’s not easy to overcome a lifetime of prejudices.
We all did it the other way around, became good friends and then didn’t let anything else get in our way.
But if you weren’t friends first, if you hadn’t seen as much as we’d seen…
” He looked at Perian and shrugged. “It’s hard to see you as anything but Perian. ”
Perian smiled. “Thank you. And you’re not wrong, really. Demons are certainly not an easy topic to discuss, especially with Mage Warriors and the ruler of the realm who is meant to be keeping everyone safe from them.”
Cormal faced him squarely. “Are we killing people we shouldn’t?”
“That’s the question, isn’t it?”
“Are there more people like you?” Cormal asked.
“I’ve never met anyone else like me,” Perian answered, and Cormal was pretty sure he was telling the truth. Not that he’d blame him for lying, under the circumstances.
“I think we know a lot less about demons than we thought we did,” Perian continued after a moment.
Cormal nodded. That was certainly clear.
“And I don’t know any wraiths or nightmares that want to have a conversation with anyone. Nor lesser demons, either.”
“We’re just talking about carnalions, then?” Cormal clarified.
There was an expression on Perian’s face that made Cormal think he was still missing something, but Perian nodded.
“I don’t think you can judge all of them based off one of them. I mean, imagine if you did that with a human.”
There was a furrow in Kinan’s brow. “Your entire perception would change depending on who you were observing.”
Perian smiled faintly. “Exactly. And maybe there are more… likely patterns of behavior than others. Maybe carnalions are more likely to be violent than humans—but I’m just saying that’s possible, not that I believe it to be true.
And even then, that doesn’t necessarily mean that all carnalions are violent, or that all humans aren’t.
And it’s hard to judge how anyone behaves naturally when they’re constantly feared and hunted.
I think we made sweeping generalizations and… some nuance has been lost.”
Perian kept saying “they” not “us”, and Cormal wasn’t entirely certain why.
Was he trying not to remind Cormal of what Perian was?
Obviously, Cormal knew. Did he not think of himself as a carnalion?
Having been raised thinking he was human, that would actually make sense. But if that wasn’t it… What was Perian?
“I haven’t been a very good host,” Perian said suddenly. “Are you hungry? Thirsty?”
“I would actually be really grateful for a glass of water,” Cormal said, before admitting, “There’s been far less drenching than I expected, to be honest.”
Perian smirked, and Kinan huffed a laugh.
“You know that was always Molun,” Perian pointed out.
Wryly, Cormal said, “I am one hundred percent certain Brannal sneaked a few in there because he was confident that I would blame Molun and not him.”
Perian laughed, his expression easy and open. Cormal was so glad that joy was still there. He hadn’t realized how much he’d feared—too late—that he’d snuffed it out.
“That’s probably true,” Perian agreed, still grinning. “Somehow, I don’t think Molun would mind. He seems very much to enjoy cooling down hotheads. I have to actually throw water at Brannal from a glass or pitcher. It’s not the same.”
“I was actually hoping to drink the glass of water,” Cormal said mildly.
Perian grinned wider. “No, no, it’s a tradition here, didn’t you know? Every guest gets a glass of water thrown at them.”
“Oh, well, if it’s a tradition.” Cormal agreed, amused.
Perian’s expression went puzzled, and his head tilted slightly to one side.
“You really would let me throw a glass of water at you, wouldn’t you?”
“If you wanted to,” Cormal admitted. “Way less painful than a knee to the groin.”
Perian was staring at him. “You’d let me do that, too?”
“Cormal,” Kinan said warningly.
Perian shook his head, but he looked amused.
“I think I actually understand a bit better now how shocked you were at Brannal’s behavior, and how you felt like he had to be under the influence of something unnatural.
Because it’s only been a couple of months, and you’re a lot like a whole different person. ”
“That’s thanks to Kinan,” Cormal acknowledged.
“It’s not!” Kinan protested.
Cormal turned to him. “It really is.”
Kinan’s expression was stubborn. “No. Because that takes away from all the work you’ve done. All the realizations you’ve made. All the effort you’ve put in to confront your old behavior. That’s not me, Cormal. That’s all you.”
Cormal cupped his face.
“Thank you, Kinan. But I assure you, as much as I’ve made an effort, it’s unlikely I’d be here without you. You make me so happy, and you make me want to be better. You make a tremendous difference.”
Perian made a sniffling noise, and when Cormal looked over at him, he was wiping at his eyes.
“You two are so cute. I didn’t see that coming.”
“None of us did. Well”—he gazed sardonically at Kinan—“except for Kinan, who’s had a crush on me for years.”
“Hey!” Kinan protested, though he was half-laughing.
Perian was laughing outright. “What’s this? A crush on Cormal? Oh, no, wait, I seem to remember you describing him as, what was it, ‘not totally awful if you like fiery redheads who lose their temper’?”
Cormal raised an eyebrow, and Kinan scoffed. “Renny is a lying liar.”
Perian laughed. “Yeah, I didn’t really think that’s what you said. But if I’d thought about it more, I might have realized you were being awfully complimentary. I was too busy trying to set Cormal up.”
Cormal stiffened. “You were what?”
Perian sighed. “It sounds stupid now, but I figured if you had some, uh, company, maybe you’d be happier overall, and we’d get along better.”
Cormal snorted, shaking his head in bemusement. “Is that why you kept staring at me? Because I was attributing way more suspect motives.”
Perian laughed. “Of course you were. I apologize for not paying more attention and working out that the exact right person was right in front of us.”
Turning back to Kinan, Cormal said, “I’m sorry I couldn’t see you.”
“You see me now,” Kinan said, eyes soft and fond.
Cormal didn’t realize how long he’d been gazing at Kinan until Perian jumped to his feet.
“Wow. All right, I’m going to go get you that water because my goodness, that is strong.”