Chapter 11
HALLIE
“And then Emmaline tried to eat your hair!” Charlie said, practically bouncing in his booster seat.
I grinned back at him. Charlie was so easy to love, full of life and kindness. So easily accepting of me and anyone else in his orbit. “She must’ve been extra hungry. Unless emus usually eat hair.”
Charlie laughed harder, shaking his head. “Good thing we had treats.”
“Good thing,” I agreed as I turned onto Main Street and headed toward the high school. I was beyond grateful for the size of Cedar Ridge. And the fact that it created a sort of easily remembered grid.
But it was more than that. The town being so small made it easier for me to push my boundaries and dive into the new.
“I wish we could’ve stayed longer,” Charlie said wistfully as he turned to look out the window.
“I bet Emmaline wished you could’ve, too.” It was the best I could give because, after my second freak-out of the afternoon, all I’d wanted to do was run back to my cabin and hide.
My cheeks heated just thinking about it. Aspen’s kindness said so much about who she was, but I was sure she wondered what was wrong with me. Everyone did. And I didn’t blame them. It generally didn’t come from a bad place, but it made me feel like a freak all the same.
Charlie let out an epic sigh, his shoulders rising and falling with the action. “I wish Dad would let us get a puppy or kitty.”
I glanced in the rearview mirror. “I always wanted a pet growing up, too.”
His eyes sparked with hope and a bit of mischief. “You could get one now! And then I could play with it all the time. Dad couldn’t say no because it would be yours, and you’re a grown-up.”
I couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled out of me. “Has anyone told you how smart you are?”
“Not today.”
I grinned at him. “Since I’m living in your dad’s guest cabin, I don’t think it would be very fair of me to get a pet without his permission.”
Charlie’s shoulders slumped. “He’s never gonna say yes. He says we’re too busy, and pets make a mess.”
The dejection in Charlie’s tone killed me.
I thought of all the times I’d begged for a dog.
But they shed and might’ve left hair on the floor of the museum disguised as a house.
It hadn’t been possible. Not for a second.
Maybe I could broach the subject with Lawson once things were a little more under control at the Hartley house.
Flipping on my blinker, I turned into the high school parking lot.
There were still a fair number of cars around.
I saw two groups practicing soccer in a far field, some runners from the cross-country team stretching, and a handful of students heading from the main school building to vehicles parked in the lot.
My hands grew clammy as I pulled to a stop in front of the school. This would be my first time around Luke without Lawson present. Part of me hoped that not having his father around would help Luke’s acceptance of me, but another part feared his behavior would be far worse.
I put the SUV in park and gripped the steering wheel as we waited. I was five minutes early, not wanting Luke to think I’d forgotten him if he got done before we planned.
“Luke’s always late,” Charlie grumbled.
“Actually, we’re early. And it’s okay if we have to wait for a bit. He’s working on his schoolwork.”
Charlie let out a harumph that made him look and sound like a tiny grandpa. “Doubt it. He and Dad are always fighting about his grades.”
I worried the corner of my lip. One thing had been clear in the few interactions I’d had with Luke. He was in pain. Some might think he had an attitude problem or was just a typical teen, but I knew it was more than that.
There was real anger stewing in Luke. And anger like that only came from one thing: hurt. Something was causing him pain. I hated the idea of it. I’d only known the boy for a single day and wanted to fix it. But I knew he’d never open up to me the way things were now.
One step at a time.
And the next one was to simply be here. To not let him get a rise out of me.
Charlie kicked the seat as we waited. I asked him questions about his favorite frog and lizards—I’d need to look up reptile facts to keep him entertained.
A beige minivan pulled in front of me and parked as the minutes ticked by—fifteen past when Luke had said to pick him up.
My stomach churned. What if he’d already left? What if I’d lost Lawson’s son on my first day of work?
My mouth went dry as I gripped the steering wheel tighter.
Then the school doors opened.
Luke walked out, clad in a black tee and black jeans, a backpack slung over one shoulder.
A girl kept pace next to him and was his complete opposite.
Golden-blond hair where Luke’s was so dark it looked almost black, a petite frame next to his tall one.
She wore light blue jeans and a floral top and beamed up at him.
She smiled at Luke as if he’d hung the moon. But the real miracle was how he looked at her. His mouth curved with the hint of a grin. It was the most positive emotion I’d seen out of him yet. His whole body tilted slightly in her direction as if she were the sun, and he orbited around her.
A woman got out of the minivan in front of me, not looking especially pleased. “Violet. We need to go.”
The girl’s head jerked up, but then she quickly nodded, giving Luke a quick wave and hurrying toward the woman.
I rolled down the passenger window to flag Luke down. His hint of a smile disappeared, replaced by that familiar deep scowl.
Instead of getting into the front seat, Luke opted for the back. The message was clear. I was the help and nothing else. He slammed the door behind him to punctuate the statement.
“How was the study session?” I asked.
Luke didn’t answer; he simply glared at me through the rearview mirror.
I fought a sigh as I started the engine. This would be a marathon, not a sprint, but what Luke didn’t know was that I’d had to live through what felt like a lifetime of agony. A few death glares from a teenager were nothing.
Charlie watched me from his perch at the kitchen island as I pulled an array of ingredients from the cupboards and refrigerator. “Whatcha making?”
His voice held a bit of skepticism, and it echoed the doubt rolling around inside me. My mother’s words swirled in my head. “Enough with these juvenile eating habits. It’s embarrassing and ridiculous. Eat something normal for once. You’re not five.”
I rested my hands on the counter, squeezing the edge. “I was thinking mac and cheese and a salad with roasted chicken. Do you think everyone will like that?”
A grin split Charlie’s face as he bobbed his head. “Mac and cheese is me and Drew’s favorite.” A little of the smile slipped. “I don’t know about salad. I don’t always like that.”
My lips twitched. What kid enjoyed greens? “Well, you can try it and tell me what you think. Maybe you can help me with the recipe.”
Charlie brightened at that. “Really?”
“I could use a sous chef.”
His face scrunched. “What’s a soush chef?”
I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing. He was too adorable. “It’s a second-in-command.”
Charlie’s doubt slipped away at that. “I wanna help with the recipe! I don’t like olives or peppers. Or broccoli or spinach. Or—”
“How do you feel about corn, onion, cucumbers, tomatoes, and avocado?” I asked, thinking it might be simpler this way.
He paused for a moment. “I don’t know about cucumbers…”
“That’s fair. Why don’t you try one bite, and then you can tell me whether they make the cut or not.”
Charlie nodded, sliding off his stool. “Sure. I’m a real good taste tester. I gotta get my chef’s hat first, though.”
He was running down the hall before I could ask how—and why—he had a chef’s hat.
I moved to the sink, rinsing the cucumber with some veggie wash before placing it on the cutting board. As I began dicing it, I heard a door slam down the hall. I expected Charlie, but Luke entered the living area.
“Do you need anything?” I asked.
I’d made Charlie a snack when we got home, but Luke had gone straight to his room. Now, he ignored my question and crossed to the fridge. He grabbed a soda and then turned, entering my space as he bent to pull a bag of chips out of the drawer next to me.
I focused intently on my chopping and breathing. The quicker Luke knew he wouldn’t get a rise out of me, the better.
Luke paused, hovering near me. “Jesus. Did you do that to yourself? Did Dad hire some sick freak cutter or something?”
I stilled, my knife halfway through the cucumber. So stupid. I hadn’t thought. I was so used to being around Emerson and Adrian, and they knew all about my scars. I’d pushed my sleeves up to wash the cucumber and hadn’t pulled them back down.
My heart hammered in my chest. Memories slammed against the walls I rebuilt on a daily basis.
I swallowed the bile surging up my throat and looked up at Luke.
“No. I didn’t do this to myself. But if I had, it would mean I was hurting.
And needed help. I doubt your response would’ve inspired me to seek that help. ”
Luke’s mouth snapped shut, and his cheeks flushed.
My goal hadn’t been to embarrass him. It had been to make him pause and think. To remember that his words and actions had consequences.
I gentled my tone. “Everyone has a battle, an inner war they hide from the world. It’s good to remember that.”
Luke’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. He didn’t say anything, simply turned on his heel and stalked away. But he left the bag of chips on the counter when he fled.