Chapter 37
HALLIE
My mouth went dry as I stared into Lawson’s eyes. The deep blue blazed brighter with the kind of heat you knew would leave third-degree burns. I couldn’t believe I’d spoken the words. But what I’d said was true. Lawson made me brave.
And I could be brave now.
I released my hold on him and stood. My legs trembled as I walked toward the bed. It wasn’t fear. It was a whole tangle of emotions. Nerves, for sure, but the strongest was want, need. A craving so intense my body couldn’t handle the force.
Lowering myself to the mattress, I focused on Lawson. That blue gaze swept over me, bringing heat to each place it touched.
“Hallie,” he rasped.
“I trust you,” I whispered.
A muscle along Lawson’s jaw popped. “Tell me what you want,” he said, grit coating his words.
I swallowed hard, my heart hammering against my ribs. “You. I want you to touch me.”
Sparks danced in the blue depths. “Need you to be more specific.”
Color hit my cheeks. “You know.”
Lawson’s expression gentled for a moment. “You’re in control, Little Minx. You’re going to tell me exactly what you want. And I’m going to give it to you.”
My lips parted as I sucked in a breath. “I, um, you know my last partner wasn’t all that…” I didn’t know the words I was looking for. “I’m not sure what I want,” I finally finished.
Admitting that had me wanting to crawl under a rock. The only boyfriend I’d had was in high school, and he had always been the one to lead things. The sex hadn’t been what I’d call good, but I hadn’t had to figure it out either.
Lawson leaned back on the couch, gaze roaming. “It’s instinct. You know what feels good, don’t you? Or what you might like to try?”
“Maybe…”
He ran his thumb along his bottom lip. “Do you touch yourself, Hallie?”
My face flamed.
A grin stretched across Lawson’s face. “My girl touches herself. Good. That means you know your body. Know what you like.”
I huffed out a breath. “It’s not. It’s never as good as what I think it could be.”
Lawson’s eyes hooded. “We’re going to change that.”
I licked my lips and nodded, my heart picking up speed.
“Tell me where we start.” Lawson’s voice was liquid smoke.
“You come here.” My words held the slightest tremble, but Lawson did as I asked.
He prowled across the space, stopping just short of me. He was so much taller than me, but when I was sitting, he seemed like a giant.
As if he could read my mind, he sank to his knees. His hands wrapped around my calves. “It’s you, Hallie. You’re leading the show. Nothing happens that you don’t want.”
I nodded but couldn’t get any words out.
Concern flitted across his features. “Why don’t we take sex off the table for today?”
My brows flew up. “Isn’t that the whole point?”
A husky chuckle escaped him. “Little Minx, we can have so much fun without crossing that line.”
Heat pooled low in my belly. A hint of fearlessness swept through me. “Show me.”
Lawson’s hands slid up my legs, over my thighs, and came to rest at my waist. His fingers played with the hem of my sweater.
I knew he was waiting for me. “Take off my top.”
My voice was barely audible, but Lawson heard me clear as day.
“That’s my girl.”
Lawson lifted my sweater and shirt, pulling it up and over, tossing it to the floor. The cool air hit my skin in a rush.
He sucked in a breath. “So beautiful.”
My breath hitched as my heart picked up speed. I couldn’t help but let my gaze drop to the scars crisscrossing my torso. They were all thin, faint even, but they covered every inch of skin.
“Eyes on me, Hallie.”
My gaze jumped to Lawson’s face.
“Beautiful. Every single thing about you.”
“Lawson,” I croaked as my eyes burned.
Lawson’s hands tightened on the edge of the mattress as if it were killing him not to touch me. That simple knowledge made me feel more powerful than I ever had before.
“Every. Single. Thing.”
The burn dropped deeper.
“My bra,” I whispered.
Lawson’s hands lifted, his finger tracing the line of fabric against my breast. “You were born for lace. Delicate and beautiful, just like you.”
He bent forward, his lips tracing the same line, his tongue flicking out.
My core pulsed, pulling in, wanting.
“Blue,” I breathed.
His head pulled back. “Love when you call me that.”
I lifted a hand, running it through his dark hair. “Blue…”
Those eyes flashed. He reached behind me, unfastening my bra. My breasts fell free, but Lawson’s hands were there in a flash. He looked up for permission.
“Please,” I whispered.
He palmed the swells, his thumbs ghosting across my nipples. They pulled into tight buds as if crying out for his touch. Lawson leaned forward, taking a peak into his mouth.
My back arched, my body seeking more of the sensation. It was as if it set off a chain reaction of sparks, leading from nipple to core.
My legs tightened around Lawson, needing pressure at the apex of my thighs. And I couldn’t help the moan that slipped from my lips.
He released my breast, his eyes heating. “The sounds you make.”
I sat up straighter, emboldened by the need in his eyes. I reached down, pressing a hand to the front of his uniform pants.
Lawson let out a groan as he pressed against my palm. Hard and thick.
My breath caught as his dick twitched. “Can I see?”
“You are going to kill me,” he muttered. “Those innocent eyes ask such devilish things.”
I bit my lip. “Please.”
Lawson stood then, taking a step back. “Only because you asked so nicely.”
His fingers made quick work of his uniform shirt, then he tossed it to the floor as he kicked off his boots. My gaze drank in the planes of muscle and the dusting of hair over his chest. Then those clever fingers were on his fly. They moved fast, and then he was shucking his pants, too.
I couldn’t do anything but stare. I swallowed hard as I took in his length. Lawson’s hand closed around it, and he pumped once, twice.
My core tightened, wanting so badly to know what it would feel like to be filled by him. “Blue,” I whispered.
“Tell me what you need.”
“I—I don’t know. I just—I need.” My words wouldn’t come, but it was like my body was burning up, and only he could stop it.
Lawson stalked toward me. “You aching, Little Minx?”
“Yes,” I breathed.
“Need me to help?”
I nodded.
“Words, Hallie. Give me your words.”
“I need you,” I whispered.
Lawson sank to his knees again. He pulled off one shoe and then the other, taking my socks with them. Then his fingers hooked into the waistband of my leggings, and his eyes met mine.
“Yes,” I said before he could even ask.
My bottoms were gone in a flash, my panties with them.
“These fucking leggings have been driving me crazy,” he growled, startling a giggle out of me. Lawson’s eyes connected with mine as he tossed the clothing to the floor. “My girl loves torturing me.”
Warmth spread through me at his words. “Maybe just a little.”
His lips twitched, and it was only then that I realized he’d completely bared me to him. But I wasn’t scared or nervous. All I felt was desire. A desperate need for Lawson. Whatever he could give me.
Lawson’s fingers ghosted up my inner thighs, pressing them farther apart. His gaze dropped to my center. His thumb parted me, and Lawson sucked in a breath.
“So beautiful. Glistening. Aching for more. You want me to eat you, Hallie? To make you come so hard you see stars?”
My core spasmed. “Please.”
I was begging, and I didn’t even care.
It was all Lawson needed. Two fingers slid inside me as his tongue circled that bundle of nerves.
I cried out as my back arched, so much sensation. And I felt it everywhere. My fingers fisted in the blankets as Lawson’s fingers stroked inside me. They twisted and curled, making me tremble.
“Blue,” I whispered.
Lawson growled against my clit, the sound sending another wave of pleasure coursing through me. He added a third finger. There was the slightest hint of pain, but it melted into heat as he teased that bundle of nerves with his tongue.
My legs shook violently as black spots danced across my vision.
“Please,” I begged.
Lawson’s lips closed around my clit, and he sucked deeply just as his fingers curled.
I fractured.
My walls clamped down on his fingers, taking all the pleasure Lawson had to give. Wave after wave crashed through me. But Lawson didn’t let up. He took and took until I collapsed back on the bed, my vision blurry.
He moved then, lying next to me and curling around my spent body.
I turned into him, my eyes meeting those stormy blue ones. “I think I love not-sex.”
Lawson’s laugh boomed out of him. He bent forward, taking my mouth. “We’re only just getting started.”