19. Rourk
Chapter nineteen
Rourk
I spend my final night in the hut I’ve called home for the past week and a half, listening to the rustling trees and heavy rain. I was told that rain, especially storms, are rare in these parts of the Wildlands. I lay there, far from sleep, wondering what this unfamiliar sensation is that’s been coming over me. This anxiety and uneasiness.
The low sounds of a heated argument stir me awake early the next morning. A few voices are disturbing the quiet air, and they don’t sound happy. I crawl off of my bedding and inch toward where I can see outside through the gaps in the hut flaps. The light is low, with the sun barely over the horizon, and the main field looks empty.
I try another angle and see some people across the field. The old man, Yovin, is there sitting on a log far to the side. He is speaking with Colm and Magdalena.
“This is ridiculous,” Colm is saying, his voice low but angered.
“And yet it is real,” Magdalena says. Her voice is normally bright and casual, but now she sounds almost unrecognizable, her tone dark. Far more commanding and controlled.
“We must see the facts,” Yovin says wisely.
Colm huffs. “I will not discuss this out in the open.”
“I agree,” Magdalena says. “We should find the others.”
I assume she means the elders, but it sounds like she’s talking about someone else.
They head across the field. I keep low and still as I peek out at them.
“I will prepare the thoro-seer,” Yovin says.
“We’ll wake up Aldus and Abby,” Magdalena says.
I sit there for a while after they’ve left, wondering what a thoro-seer is, and what it has to do with Aldus and Abby.
I throw on a sleeveless shirt and head out, keeping my actions quiet. A pre-dawn blue-gray haze is over the world, making me feel like I’m walking through a dream. The birds in the trees have only just begun their morning songs.
The field is muddy in places from the rain last night, so I stay on stone pathways to reach the rows of tents. For a while, I hear nothing but the sounds of the quiet morning birds as I creep along the tents. When I round the back of one, I catch sight of Aldus and Magdalena heading into a small tent on the outskirts of the village.
I make my way to the tent and listen by the side of it. I think this is one of their supply tents, used for hunting tools and general storage, as it’s smaller than the others and I don’t think I’ve ever seen it frequented .
Aldus’s grumpy voice sounds very disturbed about something.
“For the record, I still don’t believe this is happening,” Magdalena says challengingly.
“Let’s just trust in the thoro-seer,” Aldus says. “That’s what it’s for.”
“We should send people immediately,” Yovin says. “We need to know what is really happening out there.”
There’s a rustle in the leaves nearby. I duck to the side of the tent as two figures come into view. It’s Colm and Abby. They enter the tent with the others.
Something isn’t right here. This seems like a strange group for a secret meeting. I’ve seen them all in smaller groups before, but never together at the same time. It sounds like something very important is going on, and I wonder why they aren’t involving the elders.
“Colm told me what’s happening,” Abby says from within the tent. Like Magdalena, her voice is also different now. Slower and more severe, without her girlish lightness. “Are we sure this is real?”
“That’s what we want to find out,” Aldus says.
“We should make an announcement,” Magdalena says.
“And get everyone worried?” Colm asks skeptically.
“It’s too soon for an announcement,” Aldus says. “We shouldn’t bother the elders for such a thing. Not yet.”
“I’ll get Bohan,” Colm says, “and begin forming a hunting team for the western plains.”
They agree on this and say they will stay close to the thoro-seer to see what else they can discover .
I’m not sure what I’m hearing, but it doesn’t sound good. And why aren’t they involving the elders?
I step back into the dim shadows between the tents as Colm leaves and makes his way to the other side of the village. The sky is lightening around us and the morning gloom is gradually dispersing like mist burning away.
I consider following Colm to hear what he tells Bohan, but a flash of golden light gets my attention. I look around, wondering where it came from. It was like a faint lightning flash.
I wait a moment until another flash lights the air. This one is coming from down in the valley beyond the village. I make my way there and look down the hill to see a cluster of trees below, beyond a field of tall grass. Someone is there within the trees.
Another light flashes. The golden vibrancy of the light tells me who this person is. My heart begins beating faster.
I head down the hill and cross the tall grass to get a better look at the figure. A golden light begins to grow, casting a warm glow in the field and sending long shadows out from the trees.
When I reach the edge of the trees, I see Galene is there with a glowing light emanating from the bottom of her boots. She is several inches from the ground, standing on the solid light. Her arms are fully shrouded in a golden glow of light. Her long dress gently billows in the wind. My eyebrows rise at the sight of her in the air.
She sees me, and the light instantly vanishes. She drops and scowls at me, though there is a look of shock and embarrassment on her tense face .
“That is very impressive.”
Galene pants softly and catches her breath. “What are you doing here?”
“Morning stroll. How about you?”
She looks around, reminding me of someone trapped and looking for a way out. But she softens a little when she regards me. “I… thought I should learn more about my… ability.”
“Good for you.” I step out from the trees and approach her.
“It is not just channeling light.” She looks at her hands. “If I concentrate enough, I can harden the light. Make it solid. And… it doesn’t just come from my hands.”
I make a show of looking her up and down. “Where else does it come out from?”
Galene rolls her eyes, unimpressed with my humor. “Take a look at this.”
She raises a foot as if she’s showing me her boot. A look of deep concentration crinkles her brow.
A square of golden light appears beneath her foot. Seeing it materialize makes my breath catch in my throat. Galene pushes against the light and rises, as though she is going up a step. Her arms glow, as if the light is emanating from her skin. The light gradually lowers with her weight before it vanishes in a puff. She falters and steadies herself.
“Well, I’m still working on it,” she shrugs.
I’m guessing my presence is making her distracted or nervous, and likely affecting her ability to wield her magic. Something about her arms being fully encased in light nudges at my memory, but I can’t place it .
“I stand by my assessment. Very impressive. What made you decide to practice your magic? I thought you were against it.”
“I never said I was against it. But, I was thinking about the boar attack, and how my magic saved us. If… If I knew more about what I can do, maybe I can help other people. And I can finally stop my father from telling me I should practice more.”
I nod in agreement and step closer. “You have a good heart, Galene.”
Her breathing has increased, I see, like she’s nervous. But I also feel how strong our desire is for each other. How the air burns between us.
“You are a good person,” I say, my voice low. “And you are strong of heart. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone like you before.”
She holds my gaze, her lips quivering. I can feel my heart being pulled toward her. My lips part as I inch closer, breathing in her warm, intoxicating scent.
Galene’s face shutters and she steps back before we touch. Her eyes burn with anger.
“I don’t know what you’ve been thinking, or feeling,” she growls, “but I want no part of it. You are an Oathlander, Rourk. All Oathlanders sicken me. I could never befriend someone like you.”
The coldness in her voice strikes my heart and freezes me.
“I thought you were leaving. Why are you still here?” she continues .
My chest tightens, making it hard to breathe. It feels like the world has just tilted and I’m having to reorient myself.
“Yes, I am leaving today,” I say hoarsely.
I search her eyes for the truth and see nothing but turmoil and pain in their depths. I know I have to accept her words and her wishes.
“Not all Oathlanders are the same,” I tell her.
“I have seen no evidence against that,” she says, her voice shaky. She faces me challengingly, as though she wants me to argue with her.
“You’re alive, aren’t you?” I ask.
“I could say the same thing.”
“Your integrity isn’t the one being questioned,” I point out.
“You’ve done nothing to prove you aren’t like the other Oathlanders.”
“Bullshit.”
She just glares.
I think she’s lying to me and herself. This charged energy between us cannot only be felt by me.
I take a step closer and raise my hand to place it on her side and bring her closer, to convince her of what we are feeling. Galene flinches and slaps me hard on the face.
“That is enough,” she says through her teeth. Her trembling eyes are filled with emotion. “Leave, and never look back.”
With that, she storms away furiously.
I ache to make things better, but it’s too far gone for that. I shouldn’t have pushed things. I know I have to accept the truth, not the fantasy I’ve been making up in my head. I’ve been a fool. It’s time to return to my life.
There is nothing for me with the Shanti People.
The village has awakened by the time I reach the central field, with many people mingling and going about their chores for the day.
Aldus is pulling a cart with a mountain of wooden blocks, taking it to one of the huts being rebuilt. He pauses when he sees me and waves me over.
“I have the sister wives preparing a care pack for you,” he says. “You will have provisions for your journey home. And the map I promised you.”
“You have my thanks, Aldus,” I say. “For a great many reasons. I’m happy to help with the pack.”
He smiles and shakes his head. “They have it handled.”
“Is Leila around?” I ask. “It would be good to say goodbye.”
“She has already left with the boys. They have gone to tend to our crops in the northeast.”
I ask him to send my regards to Leila and her boys once they return, as I follow him to one of the huts being rebuilt.
Several people there are trimming thick wooden beams into shape. The woodworkers are cutting gaps in the wood to allow other parts to fit into place. I’m still amazed at how they can construct their huts by fitting wooden beams firmly into each other, with no other bindings required .
Aldus leaves to attend to some business, so I help those setting up the new beams into place while I wait for my travel pack to be ready.
A small girl watches me curiously and cautiously. I recognize her as the one who has mostly been watching me fearfully from behind her mother’s legs. Now she is smiling at me, which makes me smile back. She must have become accustomed to my presence. It makes me think how much I’m going to miss this village.
I notice a familiar face watching me from across the field. Wini, the young girl who had tried to seduce me during the festival. She stops to stare at me when our eyes connect. A passing look of what I guess to be regret, longing, or perhaps disgust, crosses her soft features. She strikes a strong figure with her blouse hugging her full chest and wide hips curving beneath her dress. Wini settles on a sneer and swiftly turns away. I guess that explains what she thinks of me.
A sister wife comes over to me, with a bowl in her hand instead of a heavy travel pack.
“Leila requested you keep your strength up,” she says, handing me the steaming bowl of stew. Large chunks of boar meat are mixed with the rice and vegetables. It smells delicious and hearty.
I take it from her gratefully.
“I thought Leila was away this morning,” I say.
The woman blushes. “Well… I’m not supposed to say, but Galene was the one who requested the meal for you. She told me to say it came from Leila.”
That brings a smile to my face. Though it makes me more confused than ever .
I sit and eat for a while, taking in the atmosphere, knowing these are my final moments in the village. A few familiar faces nod hello’s to me as they pass, while others are firmly trying to avoid eye contact with me.
Aldus comes over to me by the time I’ve finished the bowl of warming stew. He hands me a medium-sized backpack with water skins hanging from the sides.
“The map is rolled up inside,” Aldus says as he comes to me. “It will show you the best routes to take and where you can camp each night. I put it together myself.” A pickaxe and a knife are hanging from the back of the pack.
I thank Aldus for all his help. “Is everything okay in the village?” I ask, watching his reaction. “I thought I heard something about the elders making an announcement?”
His face hardens enough to make him appear like a different person. He eyes me firmly, his mouth a tight line.
“Not sure where you heard such a thing. I can assure you everything is well here. You can leave knowing we are in a good state. And we feast on boar meat thanks to you.”
Aldus notices me looking around. “I’m sure Galene will miss you, as well.” His countenance softens with a smile.
I raise my eyebrows. Does he know Galene and I have been getting closer lately? “She will be relieved once I’m gone, more than anything.”
“Women are the greatest mystery of the world,” Aldus says. I have to agree with that. “Galene is not here, anyway. She just left to spend time with Leila and the boys in the fields. She said something about wanting to clear her head. You wouldn’t know what that meant, would you? ”
I shake my head. “The greatest mysteries, indeed.”
We shake hands firmly. Aldus wishes me well and I thank him once again for getting me back on my feet.
With no desire to drag out the goodbyes or find anyone else, I make my way out of the village without ceremony. I notice some people watching me go, but mostly, I can simply disappear from among them.
When I pass the last of the tents, I hear heavy footfalls coming from behind me. The young hunter, Freddick, is rushing up to me, his long hair flapping about him.
“You’re not leaving, are you?” he says, catching his breath.
“That’s the plan.”
His face is struck with horror. “Y-you can’t. We need you here. Now, more than ever.”
“What do you mean?”
Freddick hesitates, as if wondering if he should say something. But the moment passes quickly.
“There is talk of a great disturbance out there. Like a darkness devastating the land and tearing up crops. People are saying it’s some great evil. Like… like the magic in the world is breaking.”
“What are you talking about?” He sounds like a madman.
“I don’t know. There are just whisperings. We’re waiting for the elders to tell us what is happening. But I’ve heard its something to do with everyone’s magic. Like it isn’t working properly. Or… I don’t know. But it isn’t good. We’re getting a group of hunters to take a look at the western fields. We think we’re going to find something big there. Something dangerous. We could really use your help, Tarin.”
The false name he uses tells me what I already know—I don’t belong here. I never have. I place a hand on his shoulder. “I’m sure everything is going to be fine. This sounds like superstitious and unwarranted rumors.” I swallow. “Besides, I’m just some military soldier from Oathlands. There’s not a lot I can offer you guys.”
“You know that’s not true,” Freddick argues. “I’ve seen what you’ve done here. How you helped us with the Wildlands attack. We need you.”
I swallow thickly. “I can’t stay. This isn’t my home.”
He looks physically hurt.
Galene’s furious glare flashes in my mind. I sigh and add, “Look, Freddick. I have a home to go back to. I have my family waiting for me. They think me dead. If I go back with you, I’ll never go back home. There’s always going to be something keeping me here with you all. I have to go. I wish you a good life. You will be a formidable hunter one day. Feel free to visit the Oathlands whenever you like. You will always be a welcome guest among us.”
Freddick shakes his head and steps back. “I cannot believe this.”
I frown, seeing how much I’m disappointing him. He lost his father a few days ago and I can see my departure is hitting him hard. Much harder than I thought it would. He’s shaking his head and his eyes have reddened.
I want to tell him something encouraging, but he moves away from me.
“Just go,” he yells, shaking with fury. He turns and runs back into the village .
I stop myself from going after him. There is nothing for me back there. I need to look ahead and move forward.
I begin my long journey home.
And I pretend that I don’t regret every step.