Nine
NO WAY IN hell.
Not a lot of wiggle room there.
To be honest, I hadn’t been completely truthful with Hutch during our alliance negotiations when I told him that I was in contact with Cole often .
I was actually in contact with Cole from time to time .
But tonight, just hours after Hutch’s very hard pass on my mini-documentary, was one of those times.
I didn’t even recognize Cole’s number when the call came in, if that says anything. Mostly we just sent nuts-and-bolts texts.
This phone call didn’t stand on pleasantries, either. No chitchat, no small talk… Just Cole launching right into his only question: “Did Hutch say yes to your ‘Day in the Life’ thing?”
“Um,” I said, as if I might have to think back. “No. He did not.”
“He said no?”
“Technically, he said no way in hell , but, yeah. Same idea.”
“That’s not good,” Cole said.
“I agree.”
“No, I mean, that’s really not good.”
“Why? What?”
“Sullivan,” he answered.
“What about her?”
“She fired the first two people today.”
Oh, god. “Who?”
“You know that new girl Janine with the tongue ring and the purple bangs?”
“I love her!”
“Yeah, well, too bad. She’s toast.”
“Who else?”
“Jaden.”
“Jaden? Your protégé, Jaden?”
“Yeah. He’s gonna have to move back in with his mom.”
“Wow,” I said.
“And Sullivan called me in today to ask about you .”
I frowned. “Ask what?”
“If you were any good. If you were worth keeping. That kind of thing.”
“What did you say?”
“I said you were good and you were worth keeping—and that I thought you were really going places. Which is true, by the way.”
“Thank you.”
“But she didn’t seem convinced. So I had to get creative.”
“You had to get creative ?”
“I told her that you were already filming a ‘Day in the Life’ video with Hutch.”
“What?!”
“And, okay, that it was almost done. And that I’d seen some clips, and it was awesome. And that you were going to be the next big thing. But I also emphasized the many, many shirtless shots of Hutch. And then I mentioned—in an unrelated way—that Hutch is single.”
“Implying—what, exactly?”
“Implying that if she doesn’t fire you, you might be able to set her up with him.”
“Cole! What the hell!”
“I may also have showed her some old beach photos of shirtless Hutch looking handsome.”
I put my head in my hands. “Whyyyy would you do that?”
“Look, we have to use everything in our arsenal. Word is, Sullivan’s in she-wolf mode.”
“What does that even mean?”
“She’s got a man-starved vibe about her.”
“I thought you said she was all work all the time!”
“Well,” Cole said, “she’s had a rough year. And a six-minute mini-documentary on Hutch might really appeal to her. On a deep level. Do you see what I mean? He could turn this whole thing around. Especially if you can get him to jump-rope shirtless.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying when you’ve just had a mouthwatering meal, you don’t turn around and fire the chef.”
“But don’t you see how you just made things worse?”
“You should be thanking me. Your head was on the chopping block. And guess what else? She was into it! She wants to see that ‘Day in the Life.’ She got so excited she even talked about all the vacation time she’s never used and how she might just come to Key West.”
“Do not let her come to Key West!”
“If you hurry up and get this video made, she won’t have to.”
“That makes no sense. There is no ‘Day in the Life’ video with Hutch. It’s not almost done—and, as of yesterday, it’s never going to even start!”
“You’re going to have to fix that.”
“How, exactly?”
“Ask him again. Nicer.”
“He already said no.”
“Tell him the truth. Tell him your job is on the line. He’s got a savior complex. Use it against him.”
Why did that sound so sinister?
“I have a nuclear option,” Cole said next. “But I’d rather not use it.”
“Why are you helping me?” I asked him then.
I don’t know what I was expecting from his answer, but Cole just said, “If you get canned, then I’ll have to take over the Coast Guard project. And then I’ll have to make a video about what a hero my big brother is. And I don’t really want to do that.”
I let that land.
“So we’re in this together,” Cole went on. “You’re doing something for me that I really don’t want to do, and I’m saving you from getting axed and crying in the elevator like Jaden.”
Did I want to cry in the elevator like Jaden?
I very much did not.
I sighed, and said, “Fine. Okay. I’ll ask again. Nicer.”
I WAS ABOUT to call Beanie to process all this… when the phone in my hand started ringing—and it was Beanie.
“I was literally just about to call you,” I said, by way of a greeting.
“How are you feeling?” she asked. “Are you holding up okay?”
For a second, I thought she was talking about the layoffs. But she couldn’t know about those. “How am I feeling about what?” I asked.
“About Lucas!”
Lucas? “Why would I be feeling anything about Lucas?”
“Oh,” Beanie said. “You haven’t heard it yet.”
“Heard what?”
“Lucas just dropped a new song. And it’s about you.”
I held very still. Then I said, “How do you know?”
“Because it’s all about him dumping you.”
“I’m not the only person he’s ever dumped,” I said. Right? By that criteria, there were at least three other candidates—that I knew of.
“Yeah,” Beanie said. “But the title of the song is ‘Katie.’”
Ah. Well, then.
Beanie went on, “It’s all over TikTok. And YouTube. And everywhere else. The video is him just wandering around in a field of grass, and looking forlorn, and wearing that little knitted hat you made for him after he found out he was allergic to wool.”
“ That ,” I asked, “is taking over the internet? Lucas in a knitted cap?”
“It’s all about how stupid he was to let you go.”
“No argument there.”
“And then it ends with a lyric that’s so epic, this girl I follow already got a tattoo of it.”
“What’s the lyric?”
“Love is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”
“That’s John Lennon! He plagiarized John Lennon!”
“Nope. I saw a thread about this. John Lennon’s version says ‘life,’ not ‘love.’ ‘ Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.’ Also some people are saying it was Henry David Thoreau. Or Beyoncé.”
“It’s still plagiarism.”
“Not according to a bunch of random strangers on the internet.”
“He can’t change one word and pretend he didn’t steal it!”
“Who cares?”
But now I was worked up. “It’s not even a good point! Love doesn’t happen to you while you’re busy making other plans! That’s not how love works at all. When you’re in love, you don’t want to make other plans —you just want to make plans with the person you’re in love with. That’s the whole thing!”
“Why do you care?”
“Because he doesn’t know what love is.”
“That’s not your problem anymore.”
“But now it’s everybody’s problem! Somebody who is terrible at love decided to define it for the rest of us—and now it’s becoming tattoos .”
“Yeah, well. Everybody loves that lyric.”
“Except for John Lennon’s ghost.”
“The point is, it’s a hit. You should listen to it.”
“I will never listen to it.”
“Never is a long time.”
“Fine. I’ll listen to it on my ninetieth birthday. I’ll drink a whole bottle of champagne, listen to this song, and then throw myself off a cliff.”
“Don’t throw yourself off a cliff. Throw Lucas off that cliff.”
“Great suggestion.”
“Anyway, it’s topping the charts. I feel you should get a royalty or something.”
“ John Lennon should get a royalty.”
Lucas and his timing. I had finally—finally!—found something I was more interested in than feeling terrible about him… and now here he was again, demanding my attention.
“What will you do if he calls you?” Beanie asked.
“I won’t answer.”
“Good. Perfect. Stay strong.”
“I don’t need strength. I have indifference.”
“That’s because you haven’t heard the song yet.”
DID I LISTEN to the song?
Of course. The second I hung up with Beanie.
And was it good?
Fine. Affirmative. It was good.
Annoyingly good.
The kind of song you put on repeat and it sends you into a poetically bittersweet groove that makes you reflect on life and love and what it all means in a way that hurts just right.
I never said he wasn’t a good songwriter. Plagiarism aside.
But did the song make me waver? Did it make me wish I could turn back time and be with Lucas again?
Honestly? Not really.
If anything, it made it pretty clear that I had moved on. Thanks to some very intense journaling, some bossy life advice from Beanie, and the stability that comes from standing on your own two feet for a while.
I’ll also add: it really kinda takes the shine off a man once he’s cheated on you.
Plus, to be honest, the sunny memory of Hutch’s handstand dive into the swimming pool kept lighting up the corners of my consciousness.
Not that I needed that visual of Hutch to be okay. I was just fine on my own, thanks.
But if it was free for the taking… I’d go ahead and take it.